Pastures of Faith

by Sarah Price

  “I can tell by how you avoid me,” she stated, not backing down.

  “That’s very forward,” he replied without thinking. He took a deep breath. What type of Amish were these people, he wondered. If this was the ways of the Ohio Amish, he was more than happy to stay rooted in Pennsylvania.

  For the next few minutes, they walked in silence. The only sound was the noise of their shoes on the loose gravel of the road. Occasionally, a car would drive by, slowing down out of either respect or curiosity. Daniel noticed that was the only time that Rachel seemed to slow down, shrinking behind him whenever a car approached, her body tense and the color draining from her face. Clearly she did not like Englischers.

  “You OK, Rachel?” he asked when he saw her start to walk on the grass, putting distance between herself and the road. He saw the color drain from her face and she shook her head. For a moment, he thought she was going to cry. Suppressing a sigh, Daniel stopped walking and backtracked to where she stood. “Talk to me, Rachel. Mayhaps that would help all of us help you.” His voice was soft and gentle, hoping that she might open up.

  “It’s the cars,” she finally whispered.

  “The cars?” He looked around. “There are hardly any cars.”

  She shook her head, a single tear falling down her cheek. “I…I would just prefer to walk through the field. Could we do that?”

  Taking a deep breath and glanced over the field. From where they stood now, the walk through the field would be longer as they’d have to walk around a small pond in one of the pastures. But, when he looked back at her, she was staring at him with her big brown, tearstained eyes. He reached out and took hold of her arm. “Let’s go but we should be extra careful, ja?” He led her up the small embankment and held the wire of the fencing so that she could crawl through without having to bend down so far.

  They walked through the field, careful to walk between rows of the growing crop of corn. The sprouts were barely as high as their ankles. When they came to another fence, Daniel once again lifted the wire for her to crawl through. He could sense her start to relax with every step that brought them further from the road.

  “Rachel,” he asked hesitantly. “Why the fear of the cars?”

  If he didn’t expect her to answer, he was surprised that she actually cleared her throat delicately. He glanced at her, waiting for her response. “Daniel, I…I’d ask that you not speak of this,” she started. Her voice was soft and, for the first time, he noticed that she sounded much more innocent than she appeared. “I don’t like to talk about it.”

  “I won’t speak of this,” he said, the closest that he would come to promising her confidentiality.

  Her voice was barely a whispered when she finally confided in him. “The cars remind me of what happened to my mamm.”

  Daniel digested that for a moment. If her mother was killed by a car, he thought, that would explain a lot. He looked at her again. “I’m awful sorry what happened to your mamm, Rachel,” he began. And he was. He couldn’t imagine losing one of his parents. A day without his mamm’s cheerful smile or his daed’s sparking eyes when he teased about something? “Rachel, you should have told us.”

  “I didn’t want to burden anyone,” she explained in a quiet voice.

  “You need to have faith, Rachel. Not just in the Lord but in people, too. Give us a chance. Mayhaps you’ll be surprised at how we can pull through and help support you through this troubling time,” he said and, in an effort to comfort her, he put his arm around her shoulder, giving her a friendly, light squeeze. “I’m glad you told me.”

  As he removed his arm from her shoulders, he smiled and nodded toward the direction of the pond. “Now, what do you say about walking around that pond and getting over to farm? I’m sure hungry after all this walking and talking.”

  When they arrived at Jake and Sylvia’s farm, Rachel smiled at him and quickly retreated into the house. Daniel stood and looked after her, feeling relieved that there had finally been a breakthrough. He understood so much more now about this young woman. She must have seen her mother getting hit by a car and dying. That was bound to create emotional issues for anyone. He felt a burning inside of his chest and vowed to take a stronger stance to protect her.

  “Daniel! Over here!”

  He looked in the direction of the voice that called out to him. The men were sitting near the barn, under the shade of a large tree while the women busied themselves inside with the meal preparation. It was a time for visiting and relaxing after a week of long, hard work. Daniel hurried over tossed himself onto the grass, not caring to sit in one of the folding chairs that his daed and Junior sat in. He preferred to be near the earth.

  “Jake just finished telling us about his latest with the horses,” Junior said. “Sold two of the colts for $5,000.”

  Daniel whistled and looked at his brother-in-law. “$5,000?”

  His brother-in-law leaned back in the chair, the back resting against the trunk of the tree. “Going to race in Kentucky, if you can believe it.”

  “Race horses, you don’t say?” Samuel plucked at the grass. “Sure would like to see some races some day. Bet they sure are exciting!”

  Jonas kicked his youngest son gently in the leg. “Gambling at those race tracks, Samuel. Seems a bit worldly and sinful, ja?”

  Taking a deep breath, Samuel lowered his eyes at the rebuke from his father. “Didn’t think of that.”

  Quickly, Daniel changed the subject and glanced at Jake. “So, how’s that new baby of yours, Jake?”

  The men laughed as Jake raised his eyebrows and shook his head. “Sure teaches a man to respect a good night sleep!” He chuckled to himself. “My Sylvia sure doesn’t seem to mind, though. She just gets up, takes care of that baby with no complaints. Gideon couldn’t have a better mother,” he said proudly.

  The front door of the house opened, the screen door screeching. The men glanced over at the door to see young Linda carrying a tray with four glasses of lemonade on it. She smiled at the men as she carefully mastered the porch stairs, Rachel following close behind.

  “Ach, vell,” Jonas said, rubbing his whiskers. “Look what we have here.”

  Linda walked toward them, her eyes glowing as she served the men their refreshments. “Mamm thought you might be thirsty waiting out here,” she said.

  Jake looked at her thoughtfully. “Right nice of your mamm, Linda. Danke,” he said.

  Jonas smiled at his granddaughter. “What a mighty big girl you are, Lindy!”

  As he leaned forward to reach for a glass, Linda stumbled in the grass and tripped, the remaining glasses toppling forward and landing on the ground. Two of the glasses shattered, the liquid splashing over Daniel. He leapt to his feet, the front of his shirt drenched. For the briefest of moments, Linda stood there, the empty tray in her hands and her face pale. Then, without warning, Linda dropped the tray and turned, running toward the barn.

  “Linda,” Rachel called after her. “Don’t run away. It’s all right!”

  Junior took a deep breath, leaning down to pick up to shards of glass. “Best go after her, I reckon.”

  Rachel’s expression softened. “I’ll go, Junior.” She didn’t wait for a response before she hurried in the direction the little girl had disappeared.

  Daniel frowned. “I’ll go, too. Make certain she’s not too upset,” he said and followed, but at a slower pace, keeping a distance between him and Rachel.

  Inside the barn, Rachel looked around for the young girl. The barn was empty, the cows having been set out to pasture. She was amazed at how clean Jake kept the barn. She had heard that Jake had an odd habit of being quite fastidious about keeping the barn clean. No cobwebs in the corners, no dirt on the concrete floor. She had never seen a barn so well tended but, after having gotten to know Jake, she wasn’t too surprised. He was a character, that was for sure and certain.

  Rachel walked through the empty barn, listening for any noise but hearing only the sound of the horses in their st
alls. One of them looked out over the stall door, watching her thoughtfully as she wandered through the barn, looking for Linda.

  “Where’d she go, eh?” Rachel said softly to the horse, pausing just briefly to rub the horse’s ear.

  There was a sound from above and Rachel noticed a ladder to a hayloft. Of course, she thought. The perfect place to hide and cry. With a deep breath, Rachel held her skirt in one hand and began to ascend the ladder. She emerged into the hayloft and looked around. The bales of hay were neatly stacked and the floor was swept clean. But there, in the corner, she saw the back of Linda’s head as she leaned against one of the bales, partially hidden from view.

  “There you are,” Rachel said softly. She walked softly to the little girl and sat down beside her, wrapping an arm around the little girl’s shoulders. “It’s going to be fine, Linda. Accidents happen.”

  The little girl cried, her face blotchy and streaked with tears. “I just wanted to make Daed proud of me.”

  Rachel pulled Linda closer and tucked her against her shoulder. “Ach, pride. Always a problem, it is. When we seek it, it becomes a matter of sin, don’t you see? The Bible tells us so much.”

  Linda sniffled. “Was God punishing me?”

  Rachel laughed softly. “I don’t reckon to know what God thinks or does, but I imagine that you merely tripped. Everything is fine and there is no need for tears.”

  “I broke those two glasses.”

  Rachel nodded. “Yes, two of the glasses broke. Mayhaps you can offer to help your aunt Sylvia with Gideon for a few hours to make up for it, ja? Might make you feel better if you did something nice in exchange, I think.”

  The little girl wiped at her eyes, a streak of dirt and hay dust being left behind. She looked at Rachel, her eyes wide and glimmering. “That’s a wonderful gut idea!” But, just as quickly as she seemed happy again, her expression darkened. “But Daniel…”

  “Oh Linda,” Rachel smiled, wrapping her arms around the little girl. She thought back to how understanding Daniel had been during their walk over to Jake and Sylvia’s. In fact, as she comforted the little girl, she realized that, of the Lapp boys, Daniel had been the most kind to her during her entire stay. From defending her from Samuel to getting her the ice when she hurt her ankle to taking her to the singing, Daniel had truly extended himself. For a moment, the realization struck her and she felt her heart flutter inside of her chest as a flush covered her cheeks. She hadn’t looked at the big picture, had she?

  “Your onkel Daniel is most gentle and good, isn’t he?” Rachel said, just as much to herself as to Linda. “He’d never hold something like a silly accident against you. Don’t let his quiet side fool you. He is very warm and caring, much like your own daed. They are brothers after all, ja?”

  Linda nodded. “Ja.”

  Rachel smiled. “You are a wonderful gut girl,” she whispered softly. “Now, let’s go enjoy the rest of the day. Your mamm and aendi will need some help. Let’s go back and show everyone how helpful you really are, even after such a simple and silly accident.”

  As Rachel stood to help Linda to her feet, she was surprised to see Daniel watching them from the ladder. There was an odd expression on his face, his eyes taking in the scene before him. She wondered how long he had been watching. He continued to stare at her as though he wasn’t really seeing her. Then, he shook his head and blinked, his eyes seeing her anew. A frown creased his brow and, for just a second, Rachel thought that she saw him nod his head in approval. She averted her eyes and felt the color flood to her cheeks once again.

  “There’s your onkel now,” Rachel whispered. “You can tell him your sorry, if you’d like. I’m sure that he would like that, ja? And bound to make you feel right gut, too!”

  Linda ran toward the opening in the floor and Daniel quickly continued climbing so that he stood before her. “Oh Daniel!” she cried out, jumping into his arms. “I’m terribly sorry. It was an accident. I didn’t mean to spill that all over you. I’ll wash your shirt for you when we get home,” she said.

  Daniel hugged her back before setting her onto her feet. “No need, Lindy! A little bit of lemonade never hurt anyone. Truth be told,” he said as he knelt before her, his hands on her shoulders as he stared into her angelic face. “I was a bit hot so it just cooled me off.”

  “Honest?” the little girl said, her eyes wide and bright.

  “Honest and true,” he said back. When he stood back up, he held her hand and looked over at Rachel. “Now, let’s get you two ladies safely down that ladder, ja? As Rachel said, we have the rest of the day to enjoy.” His eyes met Rachel’s and, for that briefest of moments, something passed between them. A second passed, then another. As they looked at each other, it was a moment of transformation. He gave her a smile of gratitude for her compassion toward his young niece and reached out to take her arm as he helped her down the ladder. To his surprise, she let him without any words of complaint and her own smile of appreciation at his kindness back.

  Chapter Seven

  He was harnessing the mule to the mower when he looked up and saw her. It wasn’t necessarily that she was easy to spot but the movement by the corner of the house caught his eye. She was standing near the porch, hanging wet clothes on the line. The sun was shining and the flowers were in full spring bloom. She wore a dark green dress with her black apron around her waist. As she stood on the porch, reaching for the line, she had to stand on her tippy toes to grab it.

  Daniel leaned against the back of the mule and watched, just for a moment. She was smiling, even though no one was around and she certainly hadn’t noticed him watching her. With each article of clothing that she plucked from the woven basket, she shook it once, twice then gently clipped it to the clothing line. She would pull the line so that the clothes moved further away from the house and empty line was closer to the porch.

  There was something poetic about a woman hanging laundry, Daniel thought to himself. He loved driving down the lane, seeing the gentle waving of the colorful Amish clothes suspended in mid-air between the house and the barn. It was a comforting feeling to see those burgundy and blue and pink and green dresses next to the brown pants and white shirts worn by the men. And, when a good breeze caught them just right, they fluttered like a rainbow. An Amish rainbow, he thought, as he ran his hand down the rump of the mule and gave her a good pat.

  Today was a mowing day. It was an easy day, one when Daniel would mow some of the early hay. Over the next few weeks, all of the hay would be cut but today was just a short acre, one of the first that they had planted. It had ripened early and Daniel wanted to get a jumpstart on cutting it. Plus, he admitted, it was a gorgeous day, one that beckoned him to spend it outdoors and enjoy the sun, that wonderful source of energy that God provided.

  As he started to drive the mules through the hay pasture, the mower churning up the grass behind the machinery, he caught himself glancing again at Rachel and her laundry. The clothing line was halfway filled, the dresses neatly hung by color. He laughed aloud, enjoying the individualism that she was showing by actually hanging all of the blue dresses together before hanging the green ones then the purples and then the pinks. Most women simply hung up the clothing in whatever order they fell into the basket. But Rachel spent the time to make her clothing line a work of art, one that spoke volumes about her patience and creativity. He admired that and thought back to the weekend at Jake and Sylvia’s.

  He had overheard her kind words to Linda in the hayloft. In fact, he had been stunned by what Rachel had said about him. Her distant and detached nature certainly had never given him any indication that she was interested in him or even noticed him. And certainly they had enough negative run-ins that, if anything, he would have thought she disliked him. But she had said wonderful kind things about him and had handled Linda with great tenderness and love.

  Who was this Rachel, he wondered. There seemed to be two distinct sides to her. On the one hand, she seemed so defensive, especially with Samuel
. Her sharp tongue and his unforgiving nature made it quite difficult to keep the two of them in the same room. Luckily, there was very little reason for them to be together, save Sunday dinners and services. Yet there was a gentle, loving side to this young woman. She had been so kind with Linda when the little girl had been so embarrassed and upset the other day. Daniel liked that side of Rachel and found himself watching as she created her art from wet clothes.

  “Whoa there,” a voice called.

  Daniel pulled back on the reins and stopped the mules, barely able to see who was on the other side of them. “Wie gehts?”

  “It’s me, Jake!” Jake emerged from behind the mules, his straw hat tilted backwards on his head. He was smiling, his teeth white and his face jovial as he said, “You better be watching where you’re mowing, Daniel. Your rows are a bit crooked, eh?”