Dirty Neighbor

by Vivian Connelly

  “Agreed.”

  She paused.

  “We just need to, you know, act like a couple until the next time we meet. That’s all. Like we like each other.”

  “Love, Olivia. You said ‘love’ in that room. You said we were in love with each other.”

  She sighed and rolled her eyes and looked kind of like she did that first night.

  “Fine, yes. I said we were in love. So that’s it. Just keep your cool for one week until we sign those papers.”

  “It was good though, right, Olivia?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “You know. Last night. The dancing. The car. The backseat. The…”

  “Yes, it was good. OK? Try to keep your game face on, stupid. We can’t afford to blow this thing. We each have places to be and we can’t afford to be screwing around.”

  “But we’re in love…”

  “Jonathon…”

  “Kidding. Yes, you’re right. No screwing around.”

  The door opened and another couple came in. I realized when I lifted my head that there were two more that had already come in and gotten seated. I had missed them at some point looking into her steely blue eyes. Huddy’s did a decent lunch business too.

  “I don’t want to meet here again,” I told her. “There is way too much traffic in here and the bartender keeps watching us. We need to keep this on the down low.”

  “Agreed. I’ll figure out where to meet. You just worry about selling the whole story to your family and working on that pig-headed father of yours.”

  “Olivia…”

  “Sorry. And I’ll sell this thing to my kind, caring father. No sweat, Jonathon. Two weeks from now this whole thing will all be behind us.”

  ***

  “Dude, you’re dating who?”

  Even in a cell phone conversation I could picture the confused look on my best friend’s face.

  “Olivia Hawthorne. But we’re not technically dating, that’s what I’m trying to tell you.”

  “That chick from Huddy’s with the nice ass? That’s Olivia Hawthorne? Nice. Did you bang her?”

  Yep. He was as subtle as a jackhammer.

  “I don’t really want to get into that. But like I said, we’re not technically dating.”

  “Yep. You banged her. Way to go, champ. I don’t get it though, what do you mean you’re not technically dating?”

  “The Hawthorne family is who my dad is fighting with over the fucking farm property. They own this big cattle farm in—it’s really a long story and it’s not important. But I didn’t know who she was until she showed up at the courthouse and we started trying to settle. And then the shit totally hit the fan.”

  “Oh man, I bet the shit hit the fan. When old man Hawthorne found out you were banging his daughter, he must have been pissed…”

  “No man, that’s not the way it happened. Nobody knew anything about us bang—about us being together. But when we started negotiating the whole land thing it got pretty ugly. Like our fathers yelling insults at each other. And Olivia jumped in and said we were in love to calm things down.”

  There was a moment of silence on the other side of the phone.

  “Dude I’m confused. Hey, did she say anything about her friend? Is she dating anyone?”

  “Are you listening to me, you fucking idiot? I’ve got a little bit of a crisis on my hands here. I just need you to be in the loop here. Nobody else knows about this. But people know you and I talk. If anyone asks you, me and Olivia Hawthorne have been dating for a little while, OK?”

  “Whatever.”

  “And if anyone presses it’s OK to say we’re in love, OK?”

  “Uh huh.”

  “I mean, you don’t have to get too sappy or anything, but you know what I’m talking about.”

  “Yeah, I got it. If you guys decide to get fake married, do I get to be your fake best man?”

  He was nothing if not a dry wit.

  “Sure, jackass.”

  “Great. Listen, I know it’s probably the last thing you need to hear right now, but I fear your ex-girlfriend may know that you’re in town.”

  “What? What makes you say that, Bobby?”

  “Because she sent me a Facebook message telling me she knows you’re in town.”

  “Dude—Facebook friends? Really?”

  “Hey man, don’t take it personal. But she’s really hot and she’s got hot friends. And some of her bikini pictures…”

  “Yeah, yeah, what did you tell her?”

  “I told her you were helping your old man.”

  I let out an exasperated sigh that I was sure carried clear into Clark County.

  “Look man, that was before I knew you were running this fake relationship scam with Olivia Hawthorne. I have to live in this town after you leave, bro. I’m just telling you, she’s on the lookout for you. And she is still a little hung up on you. As in her Facebook status still says ‘In a Relationship.’”

  “Great.”

  “I’m not trying to freak you out, man. I’m just telling you to watch your back. And don’t worry about this whole fake relationship thing. I’ve got you covered.”

  Chapter 8

  Olivia

  “I just don’t understand it, princess. A McCallister? Really? Haven’t I raised you better than that?”

  I had only heard that tone of voice from my father a couple of times in my life. The last time I heard it was when I was fifteen and got caught kissing a boy after curfew. I had been the responsible one in the family and this speech was usually reserved for my brother.

  “He’s not like that Daddy, he’s not. In fact, when I first met him I didn’t know he was a McCallister. I probably would never have dated him if I did, after all the things you say about them. But he’s really sweet.”

  “How long have you been dating?”

  “A year.”

  “How did the two of you meet?”

  “A friend introduced us.”

  “Why haven’t you told me?”

  “Because I knew you would be angry.”

  The rapid fire questions ceased. For now. But he was still looking at me with a wary eye. People assumed because my father was a cattle farmer and he was big that he wasn’t sharp. But he was as cagey as a fox, and he was right to be suspicious. He paused and raised his pipe to his mouth and I relaxed, which was what he wanted. Then he started with the questions again.

  “What’s he do?”

  “He just graduated from college.”

  “What’s his degree in?”

  “Accounting.”

  “Whose his favorite football team?”

  “The Broncos.”

  It was the obvious answer; we lived in Colorado after all. But my father’s eyes still registered suspicion and I made a mental note to make sure that Jonathon liked the Broncos. Because if he didn’t, he did now. Or at least he did for the next two weeks.

  My father lifted his big frame out of the kitchen chair and walked over to the window overlooking our property. I knew he was gazing in the direction of the McAllisters’ property line. Part of the reason I knew was because of the low growl that was leaving his throat.

  “Whatever happened to that fella you were dating up there at that school of yours again. What was his name?”

  “Robert.”

  “Robert, that’s it, Robert. What ever happened to him? I liked that one.”

  “We’ve already been over this, Daddy. Robert wanted me to marry him and move to Owens, Indiana. He wanted me to stay at home and have lots and lots of babies. You know that’s not what I want. I want to get my MBA and work in New York. And to get as far away from here as…”

  The words came out of my mouth faster than they should have because he had struck a nerve. And when he turned back to look at me, I knew I had returned the favor and I had hit him where he lived.

  “I mean, I’d really just like to try to get a job in the city, that’s all, Daddy. I’m not ready to settle down like M
omma did. Not yet.”

  I had played the mother card but I had no choice. I watched him as he sighed and walked over to the mantle and looked at the picture of the two of them that had been hanging there. It was a picture that had been taken forty years ago, and thirty years before she would die an untimely death.

  “I know. Your mother always said she wished she had gotten a chance to see outside of Madison County. And it breaks my heart that she never got a chance before she passed away.”

  He turned from the mantle and looked at me. Even in the darkness I could see the moisture in his eyes.

  “But she always said she would have come back here to live, Olivia. She always said there wasn’t a better place in the world to raise a family than Madison County, Colorado.”

  He changed the topic because the topic needed changing, and I wasn’t about to argue with him.

  “But this McCallister kid, that’s something not even your mother would understand. What exactly do you see in this guy? He looked as useless as his old man, if you want my honest opinion. I mean, neither one of them appeared particularly bright and…”

  “Stop it!”

  My response surprised my father almost as much as it had surprised me. I was looking at two hundred and fifty pounds of cattle rancher that had a shocked expression on his face.

  “He’s sweet, Daddy. He’s really sweet.”

  He was sweet. And he was tall. He had to be every bit of six foot four. I think that means he has two inches on you, Daddy…

  “Sweet? Is that it? That and fifty cents will get you a root beer down at Rouse’s drug store.”

  “And he’s smart too, Daddy.”

  He was actually pretty smart, and kind of funny too. Most guys would have bailed after the insults I threw at him at Huddy’s in front of Cynthia. But he had hung in there like a champ…

  “Smart? Are you sure about that, Olivia? This kid is a McCallister we’re talking about. You say you’re in love after all, and they say love is blind…”

  “He graduated from Notre Dame to get his accounting degree, Daddy.”

  I wasn’t sure what my father knew or didn’t know about Notre Dame or the rest of the collegiate system, for that matter. He couldn’t remember that I wanted to go to NYU half the time. But he bit his lip and nodded his head so I knew the name meant something to him, so he conceded on the stupidity argument.

  I had enough with defending my fake boyfriend to my father, and I knew he had enough talking about him. I needed to steer the conversation in the direction that was going to get me off the hook.

  “I don’t know what’s going to happen with Jonathon, Daddy. And none of that really matters now. What matters right now is this business with the farm. That’s what I came here to help settle for you. And we had it settled. We had reached an agreement. But then you needed to go and poke at Mr. McCallister.”

  “Stupid waste of good property, I tell you. There have been cattle on that property for as long as we’ve been here…”

  “I know that, Daddy. I know that and you know that. But we just need to settle this thing and splitting the property is the right thing to do.”

  I could feel him relaxing and I had him right where I needed him.

  “We can’t afford to go back to court and hire attorneys. It’s not what you want and it sure as hell isn’t what I want. I love you, but I don’t want to come back to Madison to help you manage the farm.”

  It hurt and I might have gone too far but I needed to say it. He nodded his head and looked at me.

  “I know, Olivia. It’s a shame. I always imagined you managing the farm when the time came. God knows your brother isn’t responsible enough to do it. But I understand, princess.”

  I leaned over and kissed him on his sun worn cheek. He would be one less thing to worry about. At least for now. I stood up to go back to my room and he threw me another curve ball.

  “Your grandmother might be another story, princess. You should probably speak to her. She was silent when we left the courthouse and she hasn’t said a damn word since.”

  ***

  “Don’t do it, Livy, don’t do it. I’m afraid you’re getting ready to make a big mistake, darling.”

  It was the second Hawthorne kitchen I had been sitting in within the last hour. This one was cozy and smelled like potpourri and cinnamon, because this one belonged to my grandmother. But the conversation was starting out exactly the same.

  “I’ve already talked to Daddy about Jonathon, Nanny. He’s not that bad. I know he’s a McCallister but it’s not like…”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about, sweetheart.”

  I watched her get up from her kitchen table and walk to the window. She had a view of the Hawthorne property just like everyone else in the family did. Pretty much the entire family was shacked up on this piece of land. For her, that meant living next door to my father.

  “I think you’re making a big mistake if you stay here in Madison, sweetheart. I have a feeling if you end up with a local boy that will be just the thing that happens.”

  “You don’t want me to stay in Madison?”

  “Sweetheart, I know you. For as long as I’ve known you you’ve talked about leaving. I just don’t want to see you throw that away for some boy, McCallister or otherwise. Tell me you won’t do it, Livy. Tell me you won’t get stuck here.”

  “Nanny, I’m not going to get stuck here…”

  “Because it will happen, Livy. You’ll be stuck here and you won’t be able to escape. You’ll get married and then you won’t have a choice.”

  “Nanny, it’s not going to happen…”

  “And then you’ll get pregnant, Livy. And once a man has you pregnant, there’s nothing you can do…”

  She was spiraling off in a direction I hadn’t been expecting. And I had been closer to my Nanny than anyone else growing up. If I needed a confidante, I needed one now. And for some reason the thought of me staying in Madison was scaring the crap out of her.

  “I’m not going to stay here and I’m not going to get trapped. It’s a lie, Nanny. It’s all a big lie. I have no intention of staying here. I’m trying to get Daddy to settle so I can get back to New York. Jonathon McCallister doesn’t want to stay here anymore than I do. He has a job waiting for him in Chicago.”

  “So you and this McCallister boy…”

  “Not really.”

  “But your father thinks…”

  “Yes.”

  It was a lot to take in, especially when you were north of eighty years old. But she was a Hawthorne. She got it. Even if there were parts I was still struggling with, she got it.

  “I don’t get it, Nanny. Why don’t you want me to stay here? I assumed when I came over here I was going to be fighting a different fight.”

  “Because I did exactly what you are doing sixty years ago, Livy. I got shacked up with your grandfather and stayed in this town and I’ve been miserable every day since. The only bright spot in my life is you and your father, but I can’t bear the thought of you making the same mistake I did.”

  “I just assumed you like it here, Nanny. I assumed you and Grandpa were…”

  “Don’t assume anything, Livy. Not all things are what they appear to be.”

  Tell me about it.

  “So this is all a big lie to get your father to come to terms with McCallister?”

  “Yep.”

  “I saw the way the McCallister boy was looking at you in the courthouse. You sure there’s nothing there?”

  “Mostly.”

  Grey hair and silver spectacles were looking at me, but she said nothing.

  “But you have to promise not to say anything to Daddy, Nanny. All I need from him is to come to an agreement with Mr. McCallister. Which honestly should be in his best interest anyway.”

  “Your secret is safe with me, sweetheart. I want to see you get the hell out of Madison. I’ll even help you if I can.”

  I reached over and hugged her and stood to leave her h
ouse.

  “I wouldn’t trust that crazy grandmother McCallister as far as I could throw her, though. That old coot has been a thorn in my side for as long as I can remember. Keep your eye on her, Livy.”

  Chapter 9

  Jonathon

  I thought I knew where she was taking me the minute we turned off the Lakeside Expressway. I was almost certain when I saw her follow the signs to the lake. And when she parked, I could see it—the little building set far off through the trees. It brought back memories that even uttering the name couldn’t suppress.

  “The boathouse.”

  In fairness, I’m not sure it ever actually contained any boats. It was a three sided structure set on the edge of the lake. I don’t know who it had ever belonged to, if it had ever belonged to anyone at all. But I knew it got its name because ‘place-where-kids-go-to-make-out’ didn’t sound so great when you said it in front of your parents.

  She looked at me as she got out of the car.

  “Oh, you know about this place?”

  “Who doesn’t know about this place, Olivia. Every kid in the twin counties comes here to make out at some point.”

  “I suppose.”

  She slammed her car door and started walking towards the little building. I admired the shapely curve of her ass before falling in behind her.

  “God, I remember coming here after junior prom with my date. Her name was Becky Taylor.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “She still had braces. She was crazy about me too.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “She was my first French kiss. I could still feel her tongue between my teeth. I think I might have even bit her that first time, it scared the shit out of me so much.”

  “That’s sweet, Jonathon. But there aren’t a ton of places to meet around here that don’t have prying eyes, and the kids are still in school. So grab some bench and let’s go over some details.”

  We moved to the shady side of the boathouse and sat down. I felt the lump in my tweed jacket and pulled out the thermos I had been carrying. She was looking at me blankly with those blue eyes of hers.