My Brother's Love

by Chara Croft

  Jesus, though, I could already tell I was never going to be able to stop thinking about it, not after this. It was everything that had ever been missing when I’d hooked up with a girl. It was Caleb.

  I pushed the thought and all its frightening implications away and focused on what was important: making my baby feel good. Kissing him until he was begging me again. Pushing our boxers out of the way and thrusting against his pretty little cock until he was shaking. Wrapping my hand around both of us and letting him fuck into my tight grip as I egged him on, told him how good he was doing, promised him things I shouldn’t and greedily took everything I wanted.

  “Jonah,” he gasped, his body going tense as he cried out and finally spilled over my hand, thrusting against me erratically as I held him down, as I squeezed his cock and smiled down at him, as I did my damnedest to make sure he got every single drop of pleasure he could from it.

  “That’s it, kitten,” I rasped, throbbing against his pulsing dick as he shuddered underneath me.

  He moaned so prettily I almost couldn’t stand it.

  I’d done this.

  I’d made my baby feel this good.

  “You’re so fucking beautiful like this, baby,” I gritted out, my balls so tight as I watched him come undone that I was almost in pain. And then, “Oh, fuck, Caleb.”

  His hot cum lubricated my cock, and when he clutched me tight and gasped out my name again, his dick jerking with one last release, my own orgasm slammed through me so hard and fast that I saw stars.

  Caleb had been mine since the day he was born, but this was what we were meant for. Nothing had ever felt as perfect in my entire life, and even though I’d come to my senses the next morning and made myself leave without waking him, a full year away hadn’t done a single damn thing to make me stop wanting that perfection again.

  Wanting him, the way brothers were never meant to.

  I thrust up into my fist as the car my parents had sent to meet me at the airport pulled into our driveway, covering the head of my cock with my other hand to catch my cum as I came with a hoarse shout.

  It was going to have to be enough. I was going to have to be strong this time and keep my hands off my baby boy… and right up until I walked in the door and saw him again, I actually fooled myself into thinking I’d be able to.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Caleb

  I fiddled with my phone as I waited for Jonah to arrive, partly to avoid the awkwardness of standing around with my parents after we’d already said our goodbyes, and partly because I needed a distraction from freaking the fuck out.

  I’d been right about the hot guy blowing up my chat after I’d walked away. We’d been flirting online for a few days, but with my brother coming home, I knew I had to stop being such a baby and move things along faster if I wanted to have any hope at all of not being too needy around Jonah.

  As if I needed any further proof that I was an idiot, the way my stomach cramped when I read Hot Guy’s latest message was it. I should be happy he wanted me. I wasn’t made to be alone. I really wasn’t good at it and didn’t like it at all… but oh God, no matter how horny I sometimes got, it just hurt something inside me to think of being with anyone but Jonah.

  I didn’t care that he was my brother.

  I didn’t care what anyone else would think of it.

  And I was never, ever going to stop wanting him to be my one and only in every single way, the way he always used to be in all the other ways, before I’d gone and ruined everything.

  I sighed, used to the aching, lonely feeling inside that thoughts of Jonah always brought up by now. I wasn’t sure if I would feel better or worse once he was actually here, but I still wanted to see him with a kind of desperation that would probably only push him away all over again if I let it show once he arrived.

  “Is that a message from your brother, Caleb?” my mother asked, sounding impatient as she nodded toward the phone in my hand, then let her glance bounce between her watch and the still-empty driveway. “He really should be here by now.”

  “No,” I said, shaking my head and amazed, even though I shouldn’t be, that she’d even asked me that. She seemed to have no clue about just how completely Jonah had cut me out of his life over the past year.

  I blinked rapidly to fight off the tears as Mother turned away to stare out at the driveway again, then looked back down at my phone to re-read Hot Guy’s last message.

  HOT GUY: So you’ve really never bottomed before?

  I bit my lip, a rush of nerves hitting me at the blunt question. Then I sucked it up and reminded myself that I wanted this—or at least, I should want it—and tapped out an honest reply.

  CALEB: I’ve never done much of anything.

  Just the one night I’d had with my brother.

  Hot Guy sent me back a dirty emoji that made me cringe and wonder how on earth I was supposed to reply. It also made me wish for things I didn’t have anymore, like someone to hold me tight and take charge of things. I was so tired of feeling like I didn’t know what to do. Of worrying so much. Of feeling adrift. And this guy did look an awful lot like Jonah… so maybe once we got together, he’d start acting like him, too? That’s what I needed, so even though I wasn’t entirely sure I really wanted to go through with it, I quickly sent—

  CALEB: Is that a problem?

  HOT GUY: Not for me. I’m more than happy to break in that sweet little ass of yours. You want to do this tonight?

  I swallowed hard, but tapped out a reply before I could chicken out.

  CALEB: Ok. Where?

  The sound of the front door opening startled me so badly that I dropped the phone as soon as I hit send. I looked up and froze, forgetting all about my phone… and everything else. Just like that, after an entire, endless year where I would have given anything to see him, Jonah was suddenly here. His hair was shaggier and he was wearing a coat I’d never seen before. He looked like he’d packed on a little more muscle than the last time I’d seen him. But he was still my big brother. My everything. And he was home.

  “Kitten,” he said, his voice sounding all gravelly and low, the way it always was when he first woke up in the morning, and his eyes burning into me like he couldn’t bear to look away any more than I could.

  My parents said something to him. Maybe he said something back. I couldn’t be sure because I was drowning. I heard a rushing sound in my ears and my knees turned to water, and suddenly I couldn’t breathe.

  “Jonah,” I gasped, putting a hand out to steady myself as my parents left in a flurry of luggage and goodbyes—but Jonah was still standing too far away, and without him by my side there was nothing to hold on to, just like there hadn’t been ever since he’d left.

  Oh, God.

  I couldn’t do this.

  I wanted him so much, and he’d already told me it was all wrong.

  I wasn’t like other people. I didn’t care that he was my brother. I wasn’t made to stand on my own and I’d never wanted to.

  Jonah had always taken care of me, and there’d been a time when I’d trusted that he always would. That he wanted to. But I knew better now, and when I started to wobble and he lurched toward me like he might catch me, I did the only thing I could to keep from breaking down completely.

  I turned and bolted for my room.

  I’d have to figure out where Hot Guy wanted to meet and then pray that once I got there, he’d be able to fill the void that losing my brother had left inside me once and for all. Maybe if that happened, I’d be able to be the kind of brother Jonah wanted.

  One who didn’t need him so much.

  One who didn’t want him that way.

  One who Jonah would want to keep.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Jonah

  My heart snapped in half when Caleb ran away from me, but before I’d taken more than two steps after him, a buzzing sounded from the floor. I glanced down out of reflex and would have ignored it if it hadn’t been for the words that caught my eye.

/>   It was definitely Caleb’s phone.

  I’m more than happy to break in that sweet little ass of yours. You want to do this tonight?

  I froze in shock as I skimmed the whole conversation. And then—

  Oh, hell no.

  I saw red. I didn’t even remember taking the stairs or bursting into Caleb’s bedroom, I only knew that one minute I was watching him make plans to give himself to someone who wasn’t me—someone who wouldn’t appreciate him, care about him, take care of him—and the next minute I’d thrown his laptop across the room and had him bent over my knee, pants yanked down to his thighs and his ass laid bare to my hand.

  “Jonah,” he gasped, twisting on my lap. “What—ahhhhhh.”

  “What the fucking hell, Caleb?” I shouted, the sound of my palm smacking the “sweet little ass” that some other man wanted to use tonight going off like a gunshot in the empty house. Red bloomed across Caleb’s pale skin as he jerked against me, arms and legs flailing for purchase. “You are not… giving yourself… to anyone… but me.”

  I wrapped an arm around his waist and held him tight against my lap, punctuating every word with another hard smack. My baby brother wasn’t going anywhere tonight, least of all to hook up with some piece of shit who didn’t deserve him, and even though I shouldn’t be saying what I was—even though I’d spent an entire fucking year convincing myself I couldn’t—I was too scared of what he’d been planning on doing tonight to censor myself. All I had was the truth.

  Caleb sobbed, somehow managing to curl into me even as he struggled to avoid my palm. “But, Jonah, I was… I’m just… I’m—”

  “Mine,” I growled, spanking him even harder. I’d do anything to avoid hurting him, but sometimes taking care of him meant making sure he didn’t hurt himself, either.

  “I’m sorry,” Caleb gasped out, the words turning into a high-pitched squeal as I laid into him, spanking him over and over again until my hand started to throb… until his wild thrashing and little cries gave way to something quieter… until I could finally take a breath without wanting to track down the motherfucker who’d been planning on “breaking in” what he should have treasured, if Caleb had actually given it to him, and breaking the worthless piece of shit in two.

  “I’m sorry,” Caleb repeated, over and over, like he was saying it on autopilot.

  I was the one who was sorry, though. I’d left him alone when I should have been stronger. I’d run away when he’d needed me.

  “I’m sorry,” Caleb whispered again, melting against me.

  I’d spanked him before. Not often, and only when he’d needed it, but I recognized his tells. His body still jerked with every smack, but his breathing had started to calm down. He’d stopped fighting it and given in. He’d accepted that I knew what was best for him and that I was willing to do whatever I needed to take care of him, and it was time to stop.

  But Jesus. I almost couldn’t.

  A shudder rippled through me as I let my hand come to rest on the curve of his ass. Heat radiated off his skin in waves, and I smoothed my palm over the bouncy, reddened flesh and down his slim thighs, breathing deep as I tried to get a grip.

  This wasn’t how I’d meant for our reunion to go. I hadn’t had a plan at all other than keeping my hands off him once I got here, but the thought of what he’d intended to do tonight had made me crazy. And worse—infinitely worse—now that I had him half-naked and draped over me in a boneless, needy sprawl, I wanted nothing more than to keep right on taking care of him.

  To love him the way he deserved.

  To comfort him after he’d scared the shit out of me.

  To claim him, exactly the way I’d just spent the last year telling myself I couldn’t.

  I rolled him over and gathered him up in my arms, holding him close as I got to my feet. He’d filled out a bit since the last time I’d held him, but he still curled against me the way he always had, fitting perfectly in my arms like he had from day one. The way he always would, no matter how big he got.

  “Jonah,” he whispered, blinking up at me with those big, wet eyes.

  His face was blotchy and his nose sounded stuffy and his bangs were sticking to his sweaty forehead, and he looked beautiful.

  “I missed you so much,” he said, the words breaking in the middle on a little sob that broke my heart and mended it, both at the same time. He wrapped his arms around me as I carried him through the bathroom that separated our bedrooms, waiting until I’d laid him out on my bed to ask, “Did you… did you really mean it?”

  I knew what he was asking, and God help me, I did.

  Caleb was still mine.

  Always mine.

  I was done fighting it.

  “Yes, kitten,” I said, leaning down and brushing my lips over his.

  I drank in the little shudder that rippled through him, then loosened his arms from around my neck so I could grab a warm washcloth and some soothing lotion from the bathroom.

  “No one will understand,” I told him, wiping the tears off his face with the washcloth and then easing him out of the rest of his clothes and turning him over onto his stomach.

  He was perfect.

  He was everything I wanted.

  He took my breath away.

  I warmed the lotion in my hands and then smoothed it into his reddened flesh, my cock twitching when the touch made his breath quicken. He subtly pushed his ass back against my hands as I rubbed the pain away, silently begging for more.

  “The way I love you, it’s not just brotherly, baby boy,” I admitted, my voice sounding thick and slow as my hands moved over him.

  “I love you that way, too,” Caleb whispered, his voice muffled against a pillow. “I love you every way, Jonah.”

  “Thank God,” I whispered sincerely, not sure how I could have handled it if things had changed for him.

  I was outright kneading his ass now, past soothing and just enjoying, and my hands tightened possessively on his reddened flesh as it hit me. I could have lost him. Maybe I should have, given how completely I’d failed to be here for him this last year.

  Caleb sucked in a sharp breath, squirming under my tight grip, but the sound turned into a delicious moan the minute I went back to massaging his heated skin. He was going to be feeling that spanking all night, and I wanted him to. I wanted him to remember he was mine—not just in his head and his heart, but viscerally, in every cell of his body.

  Always.

  I would have to go back to school in a few weeks, and I couldn’t stand the thought of him picking up with what I’d interrupted tonight when I left. It would honestly kill me.

  “Who was the man you were planning to meet?” I asked, jaw clenching hard as I waited for the answer, even though Caleb had already confirmed that he was still mine.

  “No one,” Caleb said. “Really, Jonah. Just… just no one.”

  “Good answer.”

  I believed him. Caleb had never been able to lie convincingly. The man didn’t mean anything to him, and now it was on me to make sure it stayed that way.

  “Open up for me, baby,” I said, palming his thighs and spreading them apart, and the way my sweet kitten moaned, rocking his hips against the bed? I’d bet anything he was hard.

  Knowing that made my own cock start to swell, and I worked more of the lotion into Caleb’s hot skin… slipped a hand down to massage his taint… used my thumbs to spread his crease wide and then pressed them against his pretty pink puckered little hole, over and over, until I earned a needy gasp of pure want that sent me from a semi to rock hard, faster than I could blink.

  I groaned, aching to be inside him.

  How many times had I fucked Kayla the way I wanted to take Caleb right now? With her, it had always been lights off and calling out my brother’s name as I pounded into her from behind. As I’d tried my damndest to enjoy the tight, hot hole she’d allowed me access to; the one that I could almost imagine did it for me, but that was still never enough because it wasn’t his.
/>
  It didn’t matter now. There would never be anyone else for me. There was only him.

  “There’s… there’s only you, Jonah,” Caleb panted as if he’d read my mind, turning to look back at me over his shoulder with an expression on his face that almost made my heart stop.

  He really was mine. He always had been, and I’d been a fool to ever doubt that taking him the way we both craved was right. Nothing between us could ever be wrong.

  Nothing.

  “Love you, kitten,” I said, laying myself out on top of him and instantly feeling better once he was tucked safely underneath me.

  Caleb bit his lip, his eyes filling with tears as he nodded. “I love you, too. I only went online because I thought you didn’t want me, Jonah, but if you do—”

  “Always,” I promised, gutted at the thought of what I might have lost just because… because I’d lost sight of what really mattered. Because I’d almost let the world tell me what was right and wrong instead of just taking care of my baby and his needs like I should have.

  I rolled to the side, turning him over and pulling him close so I could cuddle him against me.

  “I’m sorry I left you, kitten,” I said, my throat tight as I molded his body against mine. “But it’s never going to happen again, okay?”

  “Promise?” he asked in a small voice, peeking up at me through his lashes and killing me all over again because he thought he had to ask.

  There was a time he never would have doubted that I’d be there for him.

  Now it was my job to make sure he never did again.

  I cupped his face, staring into his eyes and baring my soul. “I promise. You’re it for me. You always have been. Nothing else matters, Caleb. Nothing. From here on out, it’s going to be you and me, forever.”