License to Love: Holiday Box Set (Contemporary Romance)
Page 54
He couldn’t look at them after hearing their praise. A quiet minute dragged out. Then Mark asked, “How’d you get Cassie’s friend over here so soon?”
“Yeah, didn’t give anyone else a chance.” Larry chuckled.
Jason’s face jerked up. “And nobody better try, either.”
The edge in his voice startled him.
“Whoa!” Larry sent Mark a look. “You’re looking at two married men here, Lancaster.”
Okay, he’d overreacted. And he saw them both raise an eyebrow at each other. “Sorry.”
He could try and explain it, but then again, wasn’t it obvious?
“Did you know her before she came to the funeral?” Larry asked, and Mark leaned forward along with him.
“She lived in an apartment building here a few years ago, before she moved to Texas, and it caught fire. I pulled her out.” He didn’t explain that they were strangers till recently, and he didn’t care. In his present state, he only cared that she was back in Eugene, living next to him.
Once they left, Jason hobbled to the door to go see Savanna and found her outside, on her way to his place.
“Hey,” they both spoke at the same time, bringing a laugh.
“You shouldn’t be walking around out here.”
At that, he nodded back toward his door and turned around. She crossed her arms and tried to look like she was thinking about it, but her coy smile lasted only so long.
“Can we redo that kiss?” he asked. Savanna unintentionally licked her lips.
She didn’t give a direct answer. “What do you mean, ‘redo’? We didn’t get there.”
They’d gotten inside his door and stood facing each other, but the crutches put an awkward spin on things. “I meant the first time, when I apologized for it like an idiot. I was shaken up and selfish, and I’m sorry.”
“Oh, that one.” She looked down at her clasped hands for a minute. A very long minute. Her face came up and she said, “You look a little wobbly. How much medicine are you on right now?”
Was she stalling? She couldn’t be nervous. Maybe she didn’t want to kiss him now, or yet, or like this. Confused, he agreed to lie back down on the couch. When she leaned over to fluff his pillow, she paused over him. He figured she wanted to forget about the kiss, but then he heard her quick breathing. She was nervous! That made him want her even more.
He wanted nothing more than to make this angel smile for him. Well, he also wanted to make her sigh with pleasure.
His will power gone, Jason reached up to trace a finger from her chin to her neck where he slipped his hand behind her head. His prompting worked. Her hand explored his jaw before she lowered her head to meet him mouth to mouth. Warm, sweet, ready.
They enjoyed the sensation without moving for a second, but that was all the restraint he had. He needed to hold her as close as possible. He wanted to kiss her senseless and make up for running away last time.
He teased and explored, while caressing her back, her neck. Savanna made a sound between a whimper and a moan, and the noise made him open his eyes.
He pulled his mouth away enough to say her name.
“Don’t stop,” she said, opening her eyes.
“Don’t?” he asked.
He watched her eyelids drop to half-open as her gaze swept over his face, over his mouth, and to his eyes with anticipation.
“You’ve got gorgeous eyes, Savanna.”
“Kiss now, compliment later,” she whispered. Who could argue with that?
Savanna stood in front of her bathroom mirror, in the third outfit she’d put on that morning. This one worked: khaki shorts and a fitted T-shirt. Casual for the weekend, but she looked good in it.
Was she getting worked up over nothing? Would he just run off again, if he could? She couldn’t breathe normally while thinking about the way he’d kissed her, with such passion. He knew how to tease and give her what she wanted, sometimes at the same time.
At eight, she called her mom and checked on Aubrey. Margaret said, “She’s having fun. Hasn’t cried for you at all.”
“Gee, thanks,” she said, but she wasn’t actually upset. Savanna would feel bad if Aubrey missed her. Savanna got off the phone and went next door, keeping quiet in case Jason still slept. Upstairs, she peeked into his bedroom and thought he looked asleep, but he said her name when she started to leave.
“I didn’t wake you, did I?” she asked, though she was glad she could talk with him.
“I wanted to see you. I’ve actually been up for an hour thinking about you.”
Savanna stood in the doorway, one hand still on the door, unable to stop staring at him. “You have not.”
He’d pulled his shirt off during the night and lay on his back, with an arm under his pillow. His mouth tilted up in a teasing way.
“How about I cook breakfast?” she offered, taking a step back. She felt herself blushing. He looked naked lying there in his rumpled blankets. “I could bring it up.”
“Hungry this early?”
“Yeah. I’ll be back in a while.” She went downstairs quickly, needing to run from the sight of him. It was all the worse because he was in bed. She felt hot and tingly all over and didn’t want him to see her checking him out like that.
She made toast, fried some eggs, and put grapes on both their plates since he didn’t have any bacon. He didn’t have a serving tray, either. She took his plate and juice up first and came back for hers, returning to sit beside him. It could almost be a morning after, except they didn’t spend the night together. This just felt so intimate.
“You’re the best.” He tried the eggs. “And these are really good.”
“Thanks.” She settled back against the headboard to eat with him. A few minutes later, she asked, “Are you feeling better today?”
“Getting there. Actually, I feel great with you here.”
Yeah, and she felt great just looking at him.
“Have you talked to Cassie, by the way?”
His question sure changed her mood. Until now, she’d refused to think about how Cassie wouldn’t come see him.
“I called and told her what happened. She asked if you were all right.” Savanna ached to tell him she thought there was hope that Cassie was coming around, but what if she was wrong? Quite a few times, she had wondered if it had been the wrong decision to move into Jason’s townhouses. That was before his accident. It was clear Jason needed her. Of course, Cassie did too, but she had also needed space.
“I’m glad you’re next door, but I got to thinking about what it meant between you and Cassie.”
That was like he read her mind. She simply said, “I talked to her before I moved in.”
“I hope I didn’t push you into it. What if it hurts your friendship?” Jason set his plate on the nightstand and rolled to face her.
“I decided to move in, remember?”
“Because I offered. And then I went and got myself hurt, so now you’re over here taking care of me.”
“Don’t you want me to?” she asked, knowing she couldn’t turn her back on someone. She cared about other people too much for that, and she really cared about Jason.
“Of course I do. I guess I’m just wondering how Cassie feels about it.” He reached to her hand and trailed his fingers over hers. “I’m treading lightly so I won’t insult your intelligence. I just need to know you’ve thought about this. I don’t want to tell you what to do, either.”
She took a deep breath to cover the swell of emotions in her chest. It meant so much to feel respected. “I know I made a choice by moving in and by helping you now. I want to be here with you, Jason. I want Cassie to get over her anger, too, but nothing I do changes anything. Maybe we’ll have to wait her out.”
“Man . . . it just seems impossible. You don’t think this will make her turn her back forever?”
“How can she?” Savanna hated how she felt pulled both ways. “She has no reason to. I’m doing everything I can to help her deal with losing Mi
ke, but there’s only so much I can do. Then I have to think about myself, Aubrey, other people like you.” Maybe this relationship would force Cassie to face her feelings and realize she was hurting people.
They couldn’t continue the conversation without talking about what was happening between them, so Savanna became quiet. He reached for her plate and stacked it on top of his.
“Come here.” He tugged her hand, and she lay down on his chest. She felt herself melt like butter into him, almost sighing because it felt so nice to have his arm around her. She liked his warm skin under her cheek, his chest hair that felt soft, and his heart beating in her ear. Lying still, she looked at her hand on his stomach as it rose and fell with his breath.
It’d been a very long time since anyone held her close and tender like this. He rubbed small circles on her lower back with his fingers, massaging and caressing at the same time. Her hips longed to respond and move in time to his rhythmic rubbing. Her skin, where it touched his, became hypersensitive. She felt so turned on she wanted to wiggle closer against him, but she thought of his injuries and tried to ignore her wants, for now. He hadn’t made any moves in that direction either, so she guessed he wasn’t ready.
After several quiet minutes, she said, “You sure don’t have much stuff in here.” Besides the bed, he had a nightstand, a dresser, a laundry basket, and some boxes against one wall. There weren’t any pictures hanging in this room, either.
“Yeah, makes it easier to move. When I moved in, I wasn’t sure if I’d stay here a while or buy something else.”
“I’m not changing your plans, am I?”
“Don’t be silly.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re always worried about making other people uncomfortable. I don’t care if I change my plans, or if you change my plans, since I do it all the time.” His hand threaded through her hair while he talked, sending ticklish shivers down her back.
“Women are trained to do that, you know,” she said in defense of herself.
“You don’t have to around me.”
She smiled against his chest and closed her eyes. Getting up early that morning had made her sleepy, and now his breathing and body heat lulled her into a fantasy about him as she drifted off.
Jason smiled when he heard her breathing slow down. He was tired, too, but didn’t want to sleep through this. Holding her felt like a dream. True, feeling her against him made him want a whole lot more right now, but he wasn’t pushing things. This was too special too push and ruin. He lay there broken, hurting, and missing his best friend, but holding Savanna still felt better than anything he’d ever known.
Life had hardly felt worth living after Mike died, and he knew that was just part of the grieving process, but Savanna was like unexpected sunshine in a storm. There was no predicting what would happen with his career, or with Cassie, or even with Savanna if he wanted to be truthful, but he tried to put it all out of his mind for the moment. Besides, some fun thoughts about Savanna were flooding in...
Nine
Savanna pulled up to McAllister’s after work with Aubrey in the backseat and spotted Cassie’s car already parked along the curb. They got out at the same time. Today marked one month since Mike’s death, and Savanna had thought about it all day, knowing she’d be having dinner with Cassie.
Inside, conversations mixed with laughter and forks clinking. A roar went up from the bar area at the other end; a game was on the big screen. Their waiter took them to the family section where they could, thankfully, hear each other.
The anniversary must have been on Cassie’s mind, too, because she didn’t say much. They couldn’t talk about Mike, not even the happy memories, without making Cassie cry. They couldn’t talk about Jason without creating a big chasm between them. Even Aubrey was a touchy subject since it reminded Cassie of losing that possibility with Mike.
Frustrated, Savanna opted for being real and sharing with her friend. “Eric filed for custody.” A wave of relief hit her because she’d gotten it out, but she had trouble looking up to see Cassie’s reaction. Aubrey continued to happily slide her ice cube around the high chair tray. It melted down to half its size, so Savanna pulled another out of her glass and set it on the tray too.
Cassie looked confused and asked, “Why now?”
“I don’t know.” Savanna swallowed hard. “I can’t let him take her away.” The shaking in her voice scared her, but it felt so good to share. They both glanced at the laughing little girl.
“Cubes, mama! Go, go, go!” She scrunched her face down close, to eye level and bumped the cube gently. Still, it bounced onto the table. Cassie used her spoon to pull another cube out for her and let Aubrey grab it in her pudgy fist.
Savanna watched them smile at each other and had to bite her lip so she wouldn’t tear up. She’d been fighting that a lot lately, and she didn’t want Cassie to see.
Cassie looked at her with crystal clear eyes. “We won’t let Eric take her away, Savanna. He can’t just change his mind all of a sudden and do that. So what if he filed? That doesn’t change anything. Maybe he can see his daughter, but there’s no way he can show up after a year of ignoring her and try to take custody away from you.”
Cassie’s focus calmed her even while it relieved her to see Cassie thinking about something else. Now she felt even better about sharing her problem.
“That’s what Mom said, that anyone can go file paperwork. It’s just . . . he has a lot of money. He gets his way.”
“Not this time,” Cassie spoke firmly. “If I can do anything, and I mean anything, let me know okay? I’ll testify, whatever.”
After a nod, she told Cassie about the mediation, but even that made her stomach twist. The waitress brought their plates, and they paused the conversation. The food looked good, but they both picked at first. It took a few bites for Savanna to actually feel hungry.
Then Cassie surprised her by saying, “Don’t go back there. Don’t go back to him.”
“What? Why on earth would I?” It didn’t make sense for the first minute Savanna thought about it, until she realized maybe Eric was doing this to get her back. No, that didn’t make a lick of sense. He had been completely disgusted with her. The romantic man that won her over had turned into a cold, mean, twisted man who hated her.
Cassie noticed her confusion. “Well, I can’t fathom what he’s thinking. That man sounds immature, selfish, and stupid, but it’s a possibility, right?”
“No, he’s not doing this to get me back.”
“Then why? He wasn’t interested in a daughter, was he? Or his marriage?”
Shaking her head and sighing, Savanna still couldn’t understand it. “No, he didn’t want me. He didn’t want her. I can’t imagine why he’d do this.”
The one other reason would be to hurt her. Could even Eric be that cold? It had been his disregard that had hurt the most. He had just stopped caring.
Cassie was taking a drink and made a noise through her full mouth. “Guilt! He feels guilty, like a bad citizen or something, so he’s trying to do the right thing. I bet it’ll blow over once he realizes you’re ready to fight him.”
That sounded much better than what she was thinking. “That could be it.” She prayed it was that simple.
Cassie must have seen her doubt and added, “What do you bet someone else pushed him into it? Maybe his family realized what a jerk he is.”
Whether or not that made any sense, it put a tight, unsettled feeling into Savanna’s stomach. “Georgia, his mother, has been calling my mom, looking for me.”
Cassie’s eyes widened. They both chewed for a few minutes, thinking.
“Thanks,” Cassie said.
“Huh?”
“For sharing that with me.”
And suddenly the evening wasn’t about avoiding touchy topics or agonizing over Eric. It was like old times when they talked about everything.
“We’re home.” She hopped out of the car to get Aubrey, but her little girl was sou
nd asleep. She carried Aubrey to bed, tucked her in, and thought about knocking on Jason’s door.
Before she’d made it to the action stage of her plan, he knocked on hers. Her stomach twirled in a good and bad way. Somehow he looked good dressed in sweats and a T-shirt, maybe because his clothing didn’t hide his nice build.
“Hey,” he said, using his crutch to come inside.
“You shaved.” She reached to his face to feel his clean-shaven skin. While she ran her hands down his cheeks, his gaze searched her face, looked into her eyes.
She guessed he had spent the evening thinking about something.
“Tell me about you, Savanna. What do you do when you’re not taking care of me, or Aubrey, or Cassie?”
She stepped back and thought a minute. “I draw pictures. Would you like to see?”
One corner of his mouth lifted. “Sure.”
She threw a smile at him and went upstairs to get her books. When she returned, she joined him on the sofa and told him the inspiring stories about her and Cassie as kids that went with the different stories she’d drawn. He looked up from the pages to smile at her, but it faded.
“That’s so like Cassie,” he said with sudden pain in his voice. The insanity of the situation hit her, making her mad. Why couldn’t Cassie come around? Cassie and Jason both missed Mike, so why did they each have to hurt more by losing their friendship? The heavy feeling still showed on Jason’s face, so she pulled his head down to her shoulder and held him.
“It’s been a month,” he said quietly.
“I know. I thought about it, too, but Cassie didn’t mention it at dinner. I guess I don’t blame her.”
Savanna returned to work the next day and spent the time thinking about him. That evening, she poked her head in Jason’s door to check on him and found him sleeping on his sofa. She knew he would gladly wake up to see her, but he still needed rest to get healthy again. Instead of leaving, she went in and took soft steps to the couch. Sometimes she watched Aubrey sleep, and Jason looked just as sweet now with his slack face, thick eyelashes, and his lips swollen.