The Way to Game the Walk of Shame

by Jenn P. Nguyen

  A devilish look entered her piercing blue eyes, and my stomach sank in response. Oh no. I think I poked the bear. Stirred the hornets’ nest. Unleashed hell. “Fine, stay here. Come have fun with the rest of us.” Lauren reached into her pocket and pulled out a small white tube. She held it out to me. “Go on. Take it.”

  It was a joint.

  She had called my bluff. And now I didn’t know what to do. Crap. Crap. CRAP.

  I rolled it around in my fingertips. It was so small and harmless looking. But I’d attended enough D.A.R.E. meetings to know how dangerous it could be. I still wore the antidrug T-shirts to bed. I still helped out at the yearly fundraisers. Heck, I even won the award for best essay in my district division just a few years ago. I knew all about the consequences.

  But now all that seemed to fade into the background with everyone staring at me. All the arguments, all the facts. Poof! Gone.

  “Taylor?”

  We both whirled around, and there was Evan. His mussed hair stuck up in all directions. He was in a threadbare black T-shirt and khaki shorts that were covered with dark, wet splotches.

  I’d never been so happy to see anyone in my life.

  His gaze jumped back and forth and finally landed on the joint in my hand. With a fierce scowl, Evan snatched it from me. “You know what? I don’t even want to know. Come on. Let’s go,” he muttered, sticking it in his back pocket.

  We had only taken a few steps when Lauren grabbed his arm and pulled him back, inadvertently knocking me off balance, since his other arm was wrapped around my shoulders. “You’re just going to leave? Just like that?”

  The simple question had a thousand other questions attached it.

  He scanned the party for a long moment before he finally released me. Time froze and I stepped back, feeling dejected. He was going to go with her. Probably deciding this ruse had played through long enough. A wave of disappointment washed over me. Not because I liked him or anything. No, because I thought we had become friends.

  NOT because I liked him.

  The smugness on Lauren’s face grew as she came to the same conclusion I did.

  To everyone’s surprise, Evan just pried her hand off ever so lightly—finger by finger—until she was no longer touching him, and he dropped her hand. He backed up a few steps until he was at my side again. With both hands raised as though he were surrendering, Evan nodded. “Yeah, I am. Just. Like. That.”

  17

  {Taylor}

  I don’t know if Evan understood what he had just done. I barely understood. Even if he was naive—and I knew he wasn’t—there was no mistaking the pissed-off look in Lauren’s eyes before we left. It was weird to see her eyes so icy when her hair and ruby lips looked like they were on fire. You could practically feel the waves of hatred radiating off her body.

  Even now I could feel her eyes piercing through my back. I didn’t know if Evan felt it, too, but he tightened his grip. And he never looked back. Not even when Aaron let out a loud “Whoop!”

  We didn’t head for the parking lot. Instead, we strolled along the water’s edge, hand in hand, but not looking at each other. Not saying anything. I was glad. I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. My mind was still reeling.

  He chose me. Me over Lauren in all her red-bikini glory. In front of everyone. His hand was warm and steady in my hand. It was both comforting and made me tingle from head to toe. And it was getting kind of hard to catch my breath.

  Finally, when the party was way behind us, he let go and sank down into the sand barely a few feet from the shore. He watched the waves crash against each other in the distance. White foam glowed against the black sea. A couple of gray-and-white seagulls pecked at the sand around us, cooing at each other every other minute or so.

  “So, that was kind of crazy,” Evan commented after a while.

  “Yeah, a bit.” Sitting down next to him, I tried to sound confident. “I could have handled it, though.”

  “I’m sure you would have.” He waved his hand in front of my face. His index finger and thumb were half an inch apart. “I helped a little bit, though.”

  “Maybe.” I batted his hand away. “Or maybe I let you play the knight in shining armor to boost your ego. Big as it already is.”

  “I think we both know that my ego is already at its max,” he said with a lopsided grin that made my stomach flop.

  “You said it, not me.”

  With a laugh, Evan shifted to the side and dug the joint out of his pocket. “Better get rid of this now before I forget. Mom and Brandon would freak if I accidentally brought it home.” He wound his arm back and pitched it into the ocean. Dusting off his hands, he turned to look at me. “So why are you here?”

  I wrapped my arms around my knees and rocked back and forth. “What do you mean? This is my scene every Friday night. Before Lauren showed up, I was the life of the party out there.”

  A wide grin came across his face. “Something makes me really doubt that, since you consider homework fun.” His hair flopped around as he shook his head. It wasn’t spiked up at all tonight, and parts of his hair were still damp. He must have been surfing before the party. “Are you sure there’s no other reason?”

  Was I such a bad liar? It was like he saw right through me. “I was worried about you. You seem different. Like you’re mad at me or something. Especially after the other night with Brian—” I broke off when his jaw visibly tightened. Uh, maybe this wasn’t the best time to bring up Brian. “Do you regret this?”

  He stared out at the water. “Depends what you mean by this.”

  What the hell. There was no turning back now. I let out a deep breath. “The contract. Us pretending to be together. Do you regret it?”

  Even though I had asked the question, I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to know his answer. Because I was afraid of what it would be. Just because he chose me over Lauren once didn’t mean anything. Maybe he was being nice.

  He finally looked down at me, and his face softened a bit. His gray eyes searched my face like he wanted to find the right answer there. His hand brushed my hair out of my eyes, and I fought the urge to lean against his hand. “No, I don’t.”

  A shiver ran down my spine at his words. “Thanks. Even if you’re lying, it’s still nice to hear you say that,” I joked to cover up my nervousness.

  Evan didn’t deny or admit that he was lying. He didn’t say anything. He just flashed me a small grin and pulled away from me. He found a small blue plastic shovel someone had forgotten on the beach and dug an oval hole. Soon a small crater was between us.

  Using my feet, I pushed sand into the hole he was making, ruining his efforts. “So we’re good?”

  “Yeah, perfect.” With a flick of his wrist, he threw a glop of wet sand on my legs. “Oops, sorry. Slip of the hand.”

  Oh, we’ll see about that. With my eyes narrowed, I dug my toes into the sand to get more ammunition before launching it at him. It landed directly on his crotch. Perfect. “Sorry, I was stretching.”

  “No problem. As long as it wasn’t on purpose,” he said with a shrug before smashing a handful of wet sand on the top of my head. “’Cause that definitely was.”

  I let out a shriek and jumped to my feet. My hands ran through my hair to shake the sand out as Evan rolled on the ground laughing. This was war now. Before he could react, I straddled his lap and used both hands to dig up as much sand as I could to bury him.

  My plan immediately backfired. He clasped my arms together and rolled over until I was pinned beneath his body. “Now, this is much better…”

  I rolled my eyes and shoved him, but I couldn’t hide the glimmer of a smile on my face. My heart hammered in my chest, and I was half scared he would feel it. “Get off. You weigh a ton.”

  “Hey, there’s no reason to get nasty. I’ve been working out, you know.”

  “I hadn’t noticed.”

  He laughed and stood up. Granules of sand were still stuck to his arms and shoulders. Taking my hands
, he pulled me to my feet and hugged me. His heartbeat thumped against my cheek. Leaning back slowly, he bent his head until our faces were inches apart. My eyes automatically fluttered closed.

  Suddenly, my feet were off the ground as Evan lifted me up in his arms, carrying me like a bride over the threshold. My eyes flew open in shock. “What are you doing?”

  “Getting payback.” He took a couple of steps forward. I could feel the cold water hitting the back of my thighs with each wave. It soaked through my shorts and underwear.

  Crap, that was cold! My arms flew around his neck, and I tried to pull myself up, practically choking with laughter now. “You wouldn’t dare!”

  “Guess what? I don’t like to be challenged, either.” And with that statement, he dove us both right into the water.

  I let out a shriek as the cold water surrounded us. My hands gripped his shoulders so I wouldn’t get swept away, but I didn’t need to worry. Evan had a tight grip around me. He bounced me up and down in the water. Not so low that my head would go underwater, but low enough that everything else was drenched. My loose shirt billowed out like a balloon as the water got underneath it, and I just thanked god that I wasn’t wearing white tonight.

  Suddenly aware that the water was also pulling the wide neckline down, showing off my plain gray bra, I shoved against Evan. “Let me down.”

  He gently set me down, and I immediately moved away from him, turning so he couldn’t see me. The water only reached my boobs, but it still made my shirt flop open, no matter how many ways I held it down. With my head bent, I tied a knot into my neckline to make it smaller.

  “Taylor, are you okay?” His concerned voice was a few feet away. “Did the saltwater get in your eyes or something?”

  I froze. “Yeah, I think so. It’s stinging like crazy right now.”

  “Shit, I didn’t mean to hurt you. Let me see.” Once he touched my arm, I whirled around and used my hands to splash a bunch of water at him. His dripping, shocked face turned to laughter. “Now that’s the girl I know and love.”

  My heart skipped a beat when he said the word love, but by the goofy look on his face, he didn’t even realize what he’d said.

  He flopped backward and floated in the water like a piece of driftwood. Hunky driftwood. The waves didn’t bother him at all as he bobbed up and down in sync with them. So at ease that it looked like he did this every night. He must have been part merman in his past life.

  The water was still kind of cold, but I was getting used to it. It was crystal clear and beautiful, but I couldn’t really see much in the moonlight. I could see my hands and arms floating, but my feet faded into blackness. Usually this would freak me out. I mean, who knew what was in the water? I could step on a jellyfish. Or there could be sharks and barracudas swimming around me right now, and I wouldn’t even know.

  But now all those fears seemed to fade away. Maybe because this felt like a dream. Or maybe it was because I knew Evan would never let anything happen to me. He’d probably fight a shark if he had to, partly so he could brag to people that he’d done it. But I’d like to think saving me would be the main point.

  If I thought it was weird to garden with Evan, that was a walk in the park. I had never imagined I would be swimming with Evan at night. Another Dear Diary moment, I guess. Funny how many of them I’d had since Evan.

  After I almost drowned last summer, I made myself learn how to swim. But I never really figured out how to float. I guess I just skipped that step. So I just waded in the water a bit as Evan drifted around me.

  I don’t know how long we stayed out there. Could be two minutes, could be twenty, but everything was so quiet and peaceful that I didn’t want to leave. I was genuinely disappointed when Evan suggested getting back to shore.

  I wrung the water out of my stringy hair as Evan shook his head like a wet dog. His hair sprang out in a bunch of directions, and I couldn’t help laughing. He looked like a porcupine. My laughter faded when he pulled off his wet shirt. I’d barely had time to register this when his hands drifted down to his pants. “What are you doing?”

  “Just getting out of my wet clothes,” he said with a shrug, like it was no big deal to strip in front of me.

  “But, but…” My hands flew up to cover my blistering-red face, and I stumbled over my own feet in my rush to turn away. “Seriously, dude!”

  He laughed. “What are you doing?”

  “What am I doing? What are you doing? You can’t just strip down wherever you want to! There might not be anyone else around, but we’re still in public! You could get arrested! Oh god, you’re going to get us arrested for public nudity. It’s going to be on my record forever.”

  “Will you just turn around?”

  “No!”

  “Come on, Taylor. I dare you.”

  Cursing at him under my breath, I cautiously turned back, but my eyes stayed glued to the starry sky over our heads. Even when I heard him come closer. Finally, Evan took my hand and put it on his hip—on smooth fabric. My head snapped down, and I stared at the blue shorts he was wearing. Not shorts, but—

  “Swim trunks,” I said blankly. “You’re wearing swim trunks.” At least I think they were swim trunks. They were dark navy and thin and very, very snug. Like tights or something, but shorts. I mean, technically he was covered up, but I could still see the lines of his thighs and stuff …

  … and I was staring. My eyes snapped back up to his laughing face.

  “Of course, I’m wearing swim trunks. You don’t know the Boy Scouts motto? Always be prepared.”

  “Yeah, I don’t think this is what they had in mind.” I felt stupid and a teensy bit disappointed. But mainly stupid. “And I have a hard time believing that you were ever a Boy Scout.”

  “That makes two of us. I try to block those two years out of my life.” A ghost of a grin appeared on his face. “It’s nice that you were thinking of me naked, though. You’re kind of a perv, aren’t you?”

  My cheeks burned, and I tried to pull my hand away. “Shut up.”

  His grip was tight around mine, and he led me to where he laid out his T-shirt and khaki shorts like a small picnic blanket. They were still pretty wet, but at least it prevented the sand from sticking to our butts. After we sat down, he finally let go of my hand, but only to wrap his arm around my shoulders. His bare skin was both cool and warm at the same time.

  I peered up at him, and he just gave me a half smile before watching the water again. I couldn’t help wondering what Evan thought of me. Sure, we got along pretty well, and I could tell he liked hanging out with me. But did he ever feel more than that?

  Not knowing the confusing thoughts running through my head, Evan wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pushed my head down, and rested his chin against the top of my head.

  I laid my head on his chest and listened to the rapid beating of his heart. Thump. Thump. Thump. Hmm … it was so comfortable here. Nice and warm. His heart was like a drum, mingling with the crash of the waves to play a song just for me. My fingers fiddled with the chain around my neck. His hand touched the coin at the same time I did. His hand was nice and warm, too. Hot, even.

  Maybe it didn’t matter how he felt. This was enough.

  For now.

  18

  -Evan-

  I should have been asleep. Hell, I should have been at home instead of lurking in front of Taylor’s house. And throwing sticks at her window like a creepy lunatic.

  I dropped Taylor off and went home for a while. But as I was lying in bed, I realized I didn’t want to be there. I wanted to see Taylor. I wanted to talk to her. Be with her.

  Luckily, her head popped out just as I ran out of sticks and was searching for a rock that wouldn’t smash her window.

  “Evan? What the heck—what are you doing here?”

  The rock fell to my feet with a clatter, and I grinned, not sure if I was happy because of the sight of her or because her hair was smashed to one side like a horn. “Come out here for a minute.”<
br />
  “What? No.”

  “Come on!”

  She threw out her hand to shut me up and nervously looked behind her. I didn’t realize till then that I had been yelling. I winced and mouthed “Sorry.” Taylor gripped the windowsill with her other hand and looked down. I could practically see the wheels in her head working overdrive before she gave me a tiny nod and disappeared.

  I met her at the back door. She wore a baggy white hooded jacket that looked like she had just thrown it on over her T-shirt. The hem ended halfway down her thighs and barely covered the plaid shorts she had on. No, wait, were those …

  “Boxers?”

  Taylor followed my gaze and quickly tugged the hem down. “I wear them to sleep, okay?”

  “Hey, I’m not judging. I’m actually wearing the same kind now.” I grinned when her eyes jerked down to my sweatpants. “Want to see?”

  “Uh, no thanks.” Even though it was dark, I could see her flaming cheeks. She ducked her head even lower and cleared her throat. “What do you want, Evan?”

  “To talk.”

  “Talk? Now?”

  “Yeah, why else would I come to your house in the middle of the night?” I laughed and shook my head. “Never mind, don’t answer that. That was too easy.”

  Even her ears were red, but at least she laughed with me. Taylor wrapped her arms around herself and nodded toward the hammock in the corner. “Fine. Come on.”

  As I followed, I couldn’t help admiring her from the back. Over the past couple of weeks, Taylor got prettier every time I saw her. Those boxers were damn sexy. Thank god it was warm tonight. I wasn’t lying when I said I had a pair just like them. I couldn’t help imagining that the pair of boxers she had on were mine and why she would be wearing them in the first place.

  I shoved my hands in my pockets and subtly adjusted the fabric around my crotch.