Leminscate as-2

by Jennifer Murgia

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Garreth wrapped me in warm arms as I stared into what was left of the fire, watching as the last of the embers smoldered, refusing to die to ash. He helped me to my feet, allowing me to lean my weight against him. I should have felt overwrought after what I had just gone through, but mixed with the shock was an undeniable sense of tranquility. A tranquility only Garreth could muster for my sake, and it felt good to be in his arms again. It felt like home.

  I wanted to ask if Hadrian was really gone. Would Garreth know for sure? I looked up at his face, and let the question slip away. If Garreth was comforting me, dulling my senses, then he had good cause to.

  Together we shuffled toward the mouth of the tunnel. Brynn stood waiting for us, biting on dirty fingernails, looking forlorn and confused. Surely she was ready to get out of her underground mental torture chamber. We guided her gently along the passageway toward the fresh air that awaited us. I looked up, noticing the roots and leaves dangling above our heads as we walked. They were no longer alive and writhing. Numbly, I felt myself being taken along, walking, stumbling … until at last the cool breath of dawn kissed my face, and I knew we were safe.

  The sun was just beginning to rise, stirring to life the sounds of the little town. I could hear a car pass, shortly followed by a second, and the rattle of the bridge connecting Pennsylvania to New Jersey across the river that no longer appeared as black as the night before. We followed the sounds, trekking silently through cool, green grass laden with dew to the front of the church we had spent hours beneath. The church was pretty. Gray with black shutters and stained glass windows arching severely toward its roofline. I pictured the pews filled with smiling worshippers, imagined it filled with soothing music, and sighed, thinking of the ordeal we had endured under its foundation.

  A few yards up I recognized the sun-kissed glimmer of Garreth’s Jeep, but I wasn’t prepared for the intense feeling of security the sight of it brought me. I could hear Brynn gently slide the keyboard of her phone closed as we slowly walked to his car. Her grip on reality seemed to be surfacing and I briefly wondered who she had texted. Would her friends even answer her? But nearly ten minutes went by without a single chime back.

  When the car pulled up and my frantic mother emerged, followed by a relieved and still disheveled Nate, I realized the numbness was wearing off and that Brynn had arranged our pickup. I could feel the magnitude of all that had happened. My bones hurt. My head ached. I let my mom cradle me, feeling her warmth. Her real warmth. It was her, not an illusion, and I hugged back, realizing I might be squeezing too hard despite my exhaustion and soreness.

  But she didn’t seem to mind.

  “Sweetie,” her eyes took in our torn and dirty clothes and she immediately went into mom mode.

  “What happened to you two?” My mom stared at me, then turned her eyes to Garreth, her voice tender but resonating insistence, especially after noticing how shaken Brynn appeared.

  “Um,” I looked over at Nate. Suddenly I was at a loss for words.

  “I knew you would find her.” Then he turned to my mother, “You see, this used to be Mary’s church. She would worship here occasionally, bringing Brynn along with her. It only made sense that Brynn would come here to feel closer to her mother on the anniversary of her death. Of course, coming here at night isn’t such a good idea, but at least they’re safe and sound.”

  He shot a knowing glance my way, making sure only my eyes saw the grateful thank you behind it. I could sense that he understood all too well everything that had taken place during the night. Of course, I would have to tell him in detail, but that could wait for later. He would want to write it all down in the journal for safe keeping. Maybe he would even give me the honor of drawing the black line through Lucifer’s name.

  “Garreth took care of me, Mom. I’m okay.” But I let her hover and fret. I was too tired to protest.

  “Actually,” Garreth’s voice rose above my mother’s worrying. “Teagan took care of us. All of us.” His angelic blue eyes included Brynn, then met mine.

  His voice sounded calm and soothing again, not like the boy I had seen at school these past few weeks, and I hoped we’d found our way back to each other. But his statement sank deeply into my heart. ‘All of us.’ No, not all of us. There was one I couldn’t save. As happy as I was to be alive, I was suffering. A part of me was gone.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Brynn and Nate reuniting in quiet. I saw Nate pull her into a hug and that she let him. There was forgiveness in the way he tilted his head and somehow I knew they had finally met half way, accepting each other.

  “Let’s get home. You three have been out all night and you’re a mess.” My mother was back to her old self, taking charge, wanting to care for us. I realized the distance that had been growing between us wasn’t just my inability to confide in her. It was a reserved way of protecting her. Of keeping her from knowing of matters that didn’t belong to our world. I also needed the distance to prepare myself, to face the greatest of fears lurking inside me. It was also up to me to take care of things. But I wondered, did I take care of things? Was Lucifer really gone?

  And if so, for how long?

  Nate held the car door open for my mom while she inarguably announced that hot showers, soup and tea were in order as soon as we reached home.

  I spied Brynn standing at the curb a few feet away, staring at the church. When she felt my eyes on her, she silently found her way over to me.

  “Teagan, I … I don’t know what to say,” she whispered. “The last few hours are a blur to me, but I have a feeling it has to do with that stupid spell I tried at home. I’m really sorry if I hurt you.”

  She had tears in her eyes again. Did I blame her for her actions? I couldn’t possibly. During the short time we were trapped together, I contemplated her actions while she slept. Faced with a similar turn of events, my life would have been just as upside down as hers, although stooping to make a deal with the likes of Lucifer was certainly not the wisest of choices.

  “You’re forgiven.” As soon as I whispered it back, I could feel the weight of guilt slip from her shoulders and cautiously, she reached for my hand and gave it a squeeze before sliding onto the back seat of Nate’s car.

  “I’ll meet you at home, Mom. I’d like to go with Garreth.” I was certain she would argue, having not known my whereabouts for an entire night, but she only smiled gently and nodded.

  The sweet scent of incense enveloped me the moment I climbed into the Jeep, but even as it tried to comfort me, I couldn’t help relive the horror in my head. I traced the lemniscate on my hand over and over, thinking of something I could have done to save Hadrian, but there was nothing. Hadrian knew I could help him become the guardian he was meant to be, and that I would be his undoing.

  ‘My unfortunate fate.’ I could feel Garreth’s warm gaze on me as he started the car and I quietly turned my head to meet it. He reached over and guided my head onto his shoulder, letting me rest. His scent was soothing and calming and I breathed in its effect. Sighing, I let the tension and fear I had harbored flood out of me

  - knowing that it was his way of gradually helping me heal. I smiled into his shoulder. In the days that would follow, we would all heal, and in time, everything would be all right.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  It was Monday and the final bell had already hummed its warning throughout the building. I was still fuddling with the combination on my locker when I felt a warm body slide up next to me.

  “So, you’re okay?”

  I looked over to see Ryan leaning against the neighboring locker and was happy to see the last of his bruises were completely gone. He still had dark circles beneath his eyes, but the evidence of his rocky ordeal these last few months was long gone, at least on the outside.

  “Ryan, it’s been two weeks,” I playfully rolled my eyes and yanked hard on the metal lever.

  “You ask me this every day.”

  He chuckled,
sliding his backpack higher onto his shoulder. “I can’t help it. You had me worried.” Ryan paused, staring out into the hallway for half a second. “But you are okay, aren’t you?”

  “Yes,” I insisted. “I’m fine.” He was never going to forgive me for dropping him off after the dance and battling evil without him. A cold shiver went down my back at the thought. What if he had gone with me? Ryan may never have made it out of there. The fears he stored in his mind were permanent and left marks of their existence. Still, I had called him the Sunday after, to fill him in. Actually, I would have called him Saturday, but I slept the entire day.

  “So what’s the news?”

  “My aunt is officially my guardian. Social Services called first thing this morning,” he said with a grin.

  “Ryan, that’s great! Your aunt seems really nice; you’ll be in good hands.” I let out an involuntary chuckle.

  “What’s so funny?”

  Clearly, he was overlooking the irony.

  “Well, it’s just that when I lost my guardian angel, you stood in; now it seems you’re being rewarded with your own.”

  “Yeah, she’s already feeling comfortable in her new role. She made me homemade biscuits and canadian bacon at the crack of dawn this morning.

  And my laundry is always folded on my bed. Weird.”

  He was already reveling in his new life and deserved to be taken care of. I could only hope the years of abuse would become a bad dream of the past.

  “You know,” he whispered, leaning in closer as I shut my locker for the day. “She even hugs me. For no reason. Just because.”

  “You need lots of hugs, Ryan. Hugs are good for you.”

  Ryan smiled, agreeing. He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he knew it too.

  “So, Garreth is back, huh?” I followed his eyes down the hall to see my blonde-haired angel making long strides toward us.

  “He is.”

  “And … Hadrian?”

  I looked down at my shoe and bit my lip, feeling an unexpected catch in my throat.

  “Sorry, Teagan, I know what you went through must have been hard.”

  I looked up into his eyes just as Garreth was upon us and nodded.

  “Back to normal, right?” Garreth said softly while flashing a smile at Ryan. Once upon a time, they would have been enemies, but not today.

  “I’m still getting used to normal.” Ryan turned to me. “Just so you know, I’m still keeping my day job. Can’t give it up yet. Catch up with you later, Tea.

  See you, Garreth.”

  I watched my friend walk away to his next class. It was nice to finally acknowledge that. My friend.

  Garreth looked at me curiously. “Day job?”

  “You may have competition; he’s the best watch dog around,” I said with a smile. “I just think he’s afraid of losing me, like he did Claire.”

  Garreth understandingly slipped his warm hand into mine.

  “So how did you make out on the calculus test?”

  “Can you believe I aced it? I didn’t even study. Actually this morning, I didn’t even remember that I had a test today.”

  A smile spread across Garreth’s perfectly angular face. “See, now you’re the one with infinite knowledge.”

  We rounded the corner past the locker quad at the far end the hall, when Brynn came barreling into the two of us. She was giddy and bubbly.

  “Did you see it? It’s huge and perfect! I got to help pick it out!”

  Scores of fellow students were walking past and lingered around to hear more. Number one, seeing Brynn excited was unusual. Seeing her share that excitement with me was mind blowing.

  “I did, actually. You did an amazing job; it’s breathtaking.” I was trying to ignore the crowd of rubberneckers, especially the three standing against the water fountain. Brynn completely brushed off the fact that not only was she making a spectacle in front of half the student body, but she wasn’t sharing her juicy news with her old friends at all.

  Sage, Lauren and Emily’s eyes widened in the same high, disbelieving arc, but neither came over to ask what the commotion was about. That’s alright. Let them wonder. After all, a rumor is more fun to spread when you don’t have the story straight.

  “Okay, so you’re coming over today, right?” Brynn’s arm linked through mine as Garreth and I began our trek out to the parking lot.

  “Yeah, sure. You’re getting a baking lesson, right?”

  Brynn’s face lit up as she thought about the afternoon ahead. “She’s going to teach me how to make those lemon bars of hers.”

  My mouth couldn’t help watering at the thought of my mother’s lemon bars. It was heaven in a little yellow square when you bit into one of those. I could just picture the happiness oozing out of my mom’s entire being knowing that Brynn was genuinely interested in learning how to bake one of her top secret recipes. I quietly calculated the lesson in my head. With Brynn and my mom in the kitchen, that would give me approximately twenty minutes to speak with Nate. As Brynn was excited about the time she was going to spend with my mom making a delectable dessert, I was equally looking forward to Nate finally showing me the contents of his ever-secretive journal.

  “You know,” Brynn paused, eyeing the two of us. “You really are good for each other.” Then she bounded off, waving goodbye.

  “Hellooo—earth to Teagan.” Garreth stopped me and took my face in his hands.

  “Oh, sorry, just thinking.”

  “It’s a lot isn’t it?”

  “Overwhelming.”

  “The fact that your mother has agreed to marry Dr. Dean, or the fact that he’s about to share some information?”

  “Both, I guess. You know he’s been filling her in, little by little. He’s shown her the journal.”

  His Jeep Wrangler was a few parking spaces away, and for some reason, I couldn’t get there fast enough.

  “Surprisingly, she’s okay with it all,” I offered. “I wasn’t sure how she would handle it, but she says a lot of things that happened make sense now. Nate has a way of explaining that she’s always admired.”

  “Hmm.” His reflection on what I had just said took me off guard.

  “What?”

  “It’s just that there’s a lot of irony going around today.”

  “What do you mean?” I turned in my seat, facing him, grateful that the end of the school day madness was shut out by the window.

  “Well, Ryan and his aunt. There’s a guardian role being played out there.” He paused at my raised eyebrows. I had almost forgotten that he knew everything, even conversations he wasn’t present for. Garreth would always be witness to everything I said or did.

  “Then,” he continued, “there’s the matter of your mother. She’s accepting the impossible in order to close a door that will in essence, open another.

  While you are taking on every aspect of that closed door and reopening it to find a new future.”

  I let it sink in.

  There were no more secrets. My mother knew. She knew about Garreth being my guardian; she knew about my mark. Suddenly, I couldn’t have felt more relieved.

  Brynn buzzed around her kitchen like a little bee, stopping to check the list of ingredients my mother had given her ahead of time. Muttering to herself, she checked the temperature on the oven, “350 degrees, preheating. Check. Oh!” She opened the wide utensil drawer in the center island and pulled out a stainless steel can opener, then recounted the cans of lemon pie filling.

  “You can bring boxes over anytime, you know. My room’s big enough to store them.” Brynn was determined to have us packed and moved in, even though it will still be a couple of weeks yet before my mom contacts a real estate agent for our house.

  “I thought we were going to wait until after graduation to start packing.”

  “I just like to be on top of things, that’s all,” and she continued fluttering about. Seeing this new side to Brynn made my head spin. Never mind the fact that she and I both had major finals t
o study for, and were getting the last of our college applications in the mail. On top of all that, we had graduation to look forward to. But if Brynn had it her way, my house would be sold, my mom and I moved in, and our parents happily married within a month’s time.

  “You just want to have a say in the wedding plans, don’t you?” I asked a bit absentmindedly as I stared out the window for my mother’s car. I was anxious to speak with my future stepfather.

  “Who me?” Brynn acted all innocent.

  “Of course you! This is a party on the grandest of scales and you’re dying to be involved.”

  “Well, maybe a little.”

  At last I could hear the tiny pebbles crunching as my mom’s car pulled around to the back of the house. Simultaneously, Nate came padding down the hall from his study to greet her. I was nearly bouncing out of my seat.

  “Hey, sweeties,” she said to Brynn and me; then she and Nate locked in an embrace that had both of us rolling our eyes.

  “Well, I see you’re all ready for me, Brynn.”

  “Yep, I have everything you told me to get.” She was all smiles, eager for some one-on-one time with the “cure” that would begin to fill the hole in her heart.

  “Calculus test went okay?” she aimed at me, not forgetting to include daughter number one.

  “Um, yeah. I got an A.”

  “Well, ladies,” Nate found the opportune moment to interrupt. “You two better get baking. I’ve been salivating for these lemon bars for about a week now.”

  Without any further discussion, my mother and Brynn set to work, and Nate wiggled his index finger for me to follow.

  My feet knew the way to the study. I could find it with my eyes closed now if I had to. Once past the massive walnut door, he motioned for me to come sit on the settee. A roaring fire was already in the fireplace, and a warm glow stretched out from under the glass lampshade. There was no abnormal chill in the air, no sudden drop in temperature, no reason to drop to my knees to scan the immaculate hardwood floor for traces of black sand or other ritual components. Nate had made obvious attempts to make me comfortable and I smiled, appreciating his kindness.