by Brenda Novak
“On me?”
“I was attracted to you from the beginning.”
“My childhood is on the internet?” he asked with a scowl, obviously too fixated on that to react to anything else.
“You’ve never Googled yourself?”
“Why would I?”
“Some people do, just to see what comes up.”
“I guess I’ve never been interested in seeing what’s out there. Everyone around here knows me, so it didn’t seem important until now. What’d you find?”
“An old article from when Aiyana first opened this place. They cited you and your...um...background as an example of the type of boy she hoped to help.”
“Oh. Right.” He relaxed a bit. “I have seen that article, now that you mention it. Although it’s been a while.”
“She probably needed the publicity to stay afloat.”
“She tried to keep me out of it, but...there’s no controlling what some reporters dig up.”
“It made for a sympathetic story—a heartbreaking story—so it had to have helped with donations.”
“I wouldn’t know. I was just a freshman then. But...what you read about me, it didn’t raise more questions?”
“It did,” she admitted, “but I’m not going to pressure you for details. If you want to talk about that period of your life, I’m here. If not...let it go—if you can.”
His mood lightened instantly. “Hallelujah,” he said. “Let’s get some breakfast.”
Cora smiled to think letting him avoid that conversation would bring him so much relief. “At Lolita’s Country Kitchen?”
“If you like that place.”
She thought it would be a nice change to go out with him, to forget about trying to hide the fact that they were romantically involved. “Sounds good to me. But...what about Matt?”
He grimaced. “Don’t tell me we have to invite him. I don’t like him very much.”
“No, we don’t have to invite him,” she said, laughing. “But I should at least go over and talk to him, tell him goodbye.” And see what she could do to minimize the damage she might’ve caused by running out on him last night...
“Do that if you have to—then call me when you’re ready,” he said and tugged the sheet away to get a final look at her before rolling out of bed.
* * *
Eli’s phone buzzed just as he was about to turn on the shower. He assumed it would be Jo again, but the screen showed Gavin’s number, so he answered. “’Lo?”
“It’s me. You on for basketball with the boys this morning?”
“Not today.”
“Why not? It’s Saturday. What else you got going?”
“I’m about to have breakfast with Cora.”
A strained silence ensued. Then his brother said, “The same Cora who was at the bar last night with her ex-boyfriend?”
“Yeah.”
“You don’t find that a little strange?”
He leaned against the door to the bathroom while he talked. “They’re just friends, Gav.”
“I thought you were going to say you’re just friends. That’s the type of thing you normally say when I ask about a woman.”
“Cora’s different.”
His voice changed, grew more somber. “Eli, I just passed Doug Maggleby a few minutes ago—out in his yard. He said her ex has been staying with her.”
“I’m well aware of that.”
“In a small house with only one bedroom...”
“Stop it. She has a couch.”
“I’m just being real with you, man.”
Eli started the shower so the water would get hot. “They’re friends, like I said.”
“How do you know?”
“She told me.”
After another brief silence, during which he seemed to be weighing whether to continue the argument, Gavin said, “Breakfast with Cora it is, then. I guess basketball can’t compete.”
“You could join us.”
“No. One of us needs to show up at the court. The boys will be disappointed otherwise. But...can I say one more thing?”
“I have the feeling you’re going to do it regardless.”
“I’ll take that as a yes. Besides the fact that Cora’s had another man in her house for several days, are you sure you’re doing the right thing, getting involved with one of the teachers here?”
“I’m not sure at all,” he admitted.
“But you’re doing it, anyway.”
Eli remembered how he’d felt last night, right before she agreed to come home with him—and how having her say yes had changed everything. When he was with her he could more easily put his childhood into perspective, more easily remember the present and what his life was like now. “I can’t help myself.”
“That’s freaking terrifying,” he said.
Eli drew a deep breath. “Yeah, I know. I guess we’ll see how it goes.”
* * *
Matt was gone. Hallelujah! The dread in the pit of Cora’s stomach eased considerably when she saw that his car was no longer in her drive. She still feared she’d find a nasty note waiting on her dresser, but at least she wasn’t facing a confrontation.
After she let herself into the house, she held her breath as she wandered around. She was afraid he’d only stepped out to buy milk or something and planned to return. But everything that belonged to him was gone. And he hadn’t left her a message or anything else to indicate that he was upset with her. While on the way home, she’d briefly considered the possibility that he might’ve dumped out her drawers, ransacked her personal belongings or thrown away her birth control...
Fortunately, all looked as she’d left it.
A ping signaled an incoming text message, so she reached into her purse to retrieve her phone.
Everything okay? Eli wanted to know.
Fine, she wrote back. She didn’t think of her ex-boyfriend as particularly vengeful, but she did know he’d always been a little threatened by her search for her birth mother. He probably blamed the fact that she’d found Aiyana and was planning to move to Silver Springs as the reason she broke things off with him. It was easier to believe that than the truth—that she just wasn’t fulfilled in the relationship.
Matt’s not giving you any trouble? He’s leaving?
He’s already gone, she told Eli.
Great. Then I’m going to swing by the basketball court and play hoops for a while—until you’re ready to go, okay?
The students were going to love seeing him. Okay. I’ll walk over there when I’m done.
She set her phone to charge, since it was almost dead after going all night, and peeled off her clothes. Then she paused to stare at herself in the mirror.
“I hope you know what you’re doing,” she mumbled and turned on the water.
Chapter Sixteen
Jo tried to call three times and texted twice while he was at breakfast with Cora. Eli had believed, if he ignored her long enough, she’d simply go away. Now he wasn’t so sure. His birth mother seemed determined, adamant—was desperate to get some money out of him. But she had no right to come to him in the first place.
“Have you thought about changing your number?”
The question caused him to glance up. Cora had seen him check his phone numerous times but, true to her word, she hadn’t asked any intrusive questions. Although this one made it clear she knew who kept interrupting their meal, it still respected his privacy regarding the details of his past and his feelings toward his biological mother.
“I have.”
“And?”
He set his phone aside. “Seems pointless to go to all that trouble.”
“If hearing from her upsets you...might be worth it.”
“I don’
t believe a new number would really get rid of her, not for any length of time. She knows where I work, could do the same thing she did before.”
She drank a sip of her orange juice. “Which was...”
“She called the office, got hold of Betty May, gave a false name and claimed to be interested in making a large donation to the school. She even went so far as to claim that Aiyana Turner recommended she speak to me. After hearing Aiyana’s name, Betty was so eager to make sure this ‘donor’ got through, she suggested Jo call my cell.”
“Yikes.”
“Exactly.” He still hadn’t had the heart to tell Betty she’d screwed up. He didn’t want anyone to know that his past had come back to haunt him. He’d thought he could handle it, was determined to bear that burden alone so Aiyana wouldn’t have to feel any added empathy or concern. She dealt with enough of that type of thing as it was.
“Has she ever come by—tried to see you in person?” Cora asked.
“Not yet. The last time she asked for money, she wanted me to use an app to transfer it. I doubt she has transportation.”
“Where does she live?”
“I haven’t even asked. I’m guessing LA, but it could be anywhere. Maybe she’s out of state. I’m not sure what her situation is, to be honest. But chances are it’s not good. It was never good when I was a child. I have no reason to believe that’s changed, since it’s obvious she hasn’t.”
He had to have raised more questions than he’d answered with the information he’d conveyed so far, but Cora simply said, “I see,” and went back to eating.
“It can be so confusing,” he admitted, watching her.
Her chewing slowed, and she swallowed. “What part?”
“All of it, but—” he pointed to his phone “—most especially what to do about her now.”
“Parent/child relationships—even bad ones, especially bad ones—can be complicated,” she said.
His food was getting cold, so he shoveled in a bite of his bacon-and-egg omelet. “Are you speaking from experience?”
“To a point.”
“Care to elaborate?” he asked, waiting before taking another bite.
“Not really. I haven’t experienced anything like what you have, which is why I hesitate to offer any advice. I don’t appreciate it when people tell me what I should do or how I should feel about certain things when they’ve never been in the same situation.”
He respected her for not being too heavy-handed with her opinions and remarks. That was what made it possible for him to talk to her even though he had so much trouble talking to most other people. He didn’t have to worry that she wouldn’t back off if he indicated he’d had enough. “I can appreciate that.”
Cora put some jelly on her toast. “Does Aiyana know your birth mother’s been trying to get in touch?”
“No. And I’d rather she not find out.”
“Because...”
“Why upset her? There’s nothing she can do about it, anyway.”
“Do you ever hear from your father?”
“My biological father died in a motorcycle accident shortly after I was born, but he wasn’t together with my mother, anyway. He probably wouldn’t have been a big part of my life.” Although... Eli had always wondered if it would’ve made a difference, had his father lived. “The man who married Jo and was there while I was growing up is in prison for sexually abusing his daughter.”
She put down her toast without even taking a bite. “He had a daughter? Did she live with you?”
“No. Stayed with her mother, only came to visit once, maybe twice a year. But if she hadn’t said something about me to the next-door neighbor—and that neighbor hadn’t called the authorities—I might never have escaped my...situation.”
“Seems more likely she would’ve told her mother about you. That didn’t happen?”
“She was quite a bit younger than I was. Who can say how much she really understood or conveyed about what was going on at my house? The way I heard it, she said something about her father having a boy for a dog—as if it wasn’t a big deal—which shows you right there that her understanding was limited. Anyway, Jenny’s mother never did anything, even if she did know. I’m guessing she ignored what she could, felt the less she had to do with Tim and his life, the better.”
“I bet she’d like to kill him now.”
He turned his water cup around, making circles in the condensation. “That makes two of us.”
“I don’t blame you. Are you still in contact with Jenny?”
“She’s married, lives in Virginia, so I don’t see her often, but we’ve had lunch once or twice.”
“And Tim?”
“Nothing from him, thank God. I wish my mother would follow suit and leave me the hell alone. I have a new life, am an entirely different person. I don’t want anything to do with her.”
She waited for the waitress, who’d come around with a pitcher, to fill her glass and leave. “So...what are you going to do?”
He picked up his phone. “I’m going to tell her to beat it. Again.” He did that, but turning her away wasn’t as easy as he was leading Cora to believe. Part of him—the part that admired the mother/child sculpture Cora had brought into his office when they’d first met—still craved an apology, an explanation he could understand, some sense of closure, even a little contrition, if not a full acknowledgment of what she’d done. She owed him something.
Whatever that something was, however, he’d never get it. She was too narcissistic to feel the slightest bit of remorse. How could she feel bad about what she’d done when she claimed no responsibility?
As difficult as it was, he had to learn to live with the reality that she wasn’t a fully functioning individual, that she never loved him and never would.
Some things just were what they were, he told himself.
“Is she or Tim responsible for the scar on your face?” Cora asked.
He fingered it, remembering. Late one night, he’d managed to get free of the cage they kept him in, but instead of running—he was too weak from lack of food—he tried to get something to eat. Tim caught him going through the pantry and slugged him so hard he’d flown across the kitchen, right into the door frame, splitting open his chin. There’d been so much blood, yet they’d never taken him to the doctor, which was why the cut had healed so badly. “Yeah.”
Cora reached across the table to take his hand. “Bastards. I hope they rot in hell.”
He couldn’t help smiling. He’d never heard her use that kind of language before. “I like being with you,” he said as if it was a revelation, because it was. Not only was she refreshing, she was healing, knew how to be supportive without being too overbearing. He felt like a whole new person when she was around, and that didn’t happen with just anyone.
He expected her to say the same to him, but she didn’t. “Who wouldn’t?” she said and that enabled them to climb out of the mire of his past—to shove it all away—with a laugh.
* * *
Cora was invited back to Aiyana’s for dinner on Sunday night. She’d been looking forward to it ever since she’d left Aiyana’s house last week. Only this time she’d be going as Eli’s girlfriend, which changed the way she’d be viewed by everyone else at the gathering. She knew Aiyana, and Eli’s brothers, would be watching her in a different way. She’d also be that much more conscious of what she was hiding from them.
As it turned out, however, she didn’t mind the extra attention. Gavin teased her quite a bit more and the younger brothers gave her shy smiles as if they were excited to think Eli had a romantic interest, but Aiyana treated her as kindly and politely as ever, almost as if she was determined to ignore the change. It was Eli who surprised her the most. He touched her freely and at every opportunity, despite the presence of his family. He could be so
withdrawn and difficult to read, she hadn’t expected him to be this demonstrative.
“How are your classes going?” Aiyana asked after they’d shooed the men from the kitchen so they could clean up without threading their way around so many big bodies.
Cora liked having this time alone with Aiyana, liked puttering around, helping with such mundane tasks. “They’re going well.”
Aiyana filled the sink with hot water. “You’re not having any behavioral issues, are you? I remember you were worried about that.”
“The new student—Zack Headerly—is giving me some trouble, but from what Darci says, he’s acting out in English class, too. I think it’s a general problem and not specific to me.”
Aiyana lowered her voice in concern. “You know his parents were killed in a plane crash last year...”
“Yes. Eli told me. My heart breaks for him. That’s why I haven’t sent him to the office. I’ve been trying to gain a rapport with him, hoping the relationship we establish will encourage him to settle down.”
“How’s that going?”
Cora put plastic wrap over the cauliflower au gratin she’d made and contributed to the dinner. “It’s too early to tell, but I remain hopeful.”
“Let me know if you need help.”
“I will. I was thinking that maybe Eli and I could take him and a friend riding this week. I feel as if some one-on-one time might help calm and reassure him. He needs to know that there are people who are still invested in him and his life.”
Aiyana tossed Cora an approving smile. “That’s the real secret,” she said, her hands deep in suds. “I’ve invited him to have lunch with me tomorrow, so I’m trying to do the same thing.”
Cora began loading the dirty silverware into the dishwasher. “Do you spend one-on-one time with all the boys?” That would be a daunting task, she thought, in addition to running the school and taking care of such a big family. Aiyana still had two high schoolers at home, who had homework every afternoon along with sports, but Cora supposed living on campus made a big difference.
“Just the most troubled,” Aiyana replied. “I wish I had time to get to know them all on the same level, but the logistics are such that...”
