An Amish Honor

by J. E. B. Spredemann

  His mouth now gaped open and he stared after her, then he stared at the flowers as though they could explain his sister’s irrational reaction.

  Does she hate flowers? How could anyone hate flowers—especially girls? He was pretty sure that maed liked flowers. Usually. Not that he was an expert in knowing what maed liked or didn’t like. He’d never even courted anyone.

  He tiptoed to her room and listened at the door. Still crying. He’d never understand the emotions behind female behavior, he was certain sure.

  Should he ask after her? Should he just leave her alone?

  “Dinah?” He gently called through the door.

  A muffled reply came from the other side of the door. “Go away.”

  He sighed and tried to figure out what to do with the flowers. He didn’t want to throw them away after all the trouble he’d gone through. He could set them on the table, but then they might upset Dinah again. And who knew how his brothers would react to him having picked flowers. He could hear their derision even now. Maybe he’d just take them to his and Benjamin’s room. Jah, that’s what he would do, he decided and headed up the stairs.

  “Joseph?”

  He looked down at his sister from the top step, still holding the unappreciated jar of flowers. “Jah?” He frowned.

  “I’m sorry. I’ll take the flowers.”

  Yep, he’d never understand maed. “You will? You’re sure?”

  “Jah.”

  He clomped back down the stairs. “I thought they’d look pretty in your room on your desk.”

  “Denki.” She received the bouquet from his hand. “I…I’m sorry I reacted that way.”

  “There was a reason, ain’t so?”

  Tears sprung to her eyes again, but instead of running to her room, she simply brushed them away. “Someone gave me flowers before. One time.”

  He remained quiet in case she wanted to expound on her story.

  She shrugged. “He’s gone now. I didn’t even know him for very long, but I miss him. I always think about what could have been. The life we could have had together.”

  “Your husband?”

  “Jah.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “It was a long time ago, but it seems like yesterday. My brothers thought they were protecting my honor.” She shook her head. “All they did was make things worse. Do they have any idea how difficult it is to be a woman and not have your own kinner? Knowing that you will never have your own bopplin or husband?”

  He did know that children were considered a blessing and most Amish families would welcome as many as the Good Lord gave them.

  “Perhaps another man will have you.”

  “Nee. No one would choose me for a fraa.”

  His heart ached at her declaration and the pain behind it. “You could pray.”

  “Joseph, I’ve prayed a thousand times. Since I’ve never received an answer, I assume that is my answer. No.” She smelled the flowers. “Listen, I’m fine. I have a new normal. I’ve accepted my lot in life. I don’t usually cry about it. Anymore. It’s just, the flowers reminded me of him.”

  “I’m sorry I picked them.”

  “Joseph, bruder, never be sorry for doing a kind deed for someone else. Even if the other person doesn’t appreciate it, Der Herr sees your heart.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Denki.”

  She began walking away.

  “Dinah?”

  “Jah?” She turned.

  “I would marry you.” His cheeks warmed. “I mean, if you weren’t my half-sister.”

  “You, bruder, are a sweetheart. You know that?”

  He grinned as she walked back to her bedroom with the bouquet of wildflowers. His cheek still felt a bit moist where she’d planted a sisterly kiss. When was the last time anyone had kissed him? Most likely, the last person to kiss him had been Mamm.

  As Dinah strolled back into the kitchen with a song on her lips, Joseph decided that jah, Dinah would have made a gut mother.

  Please bless her, Gott.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Joseph lifted his face as the sun caressed his cheeks. Days like this were his favorite. Just him and Dat, with the brothers off somewhere else. Leaving him alone.

  They walked along their property—only one of several Dat owned. He’d purchased different plots years ago so he could have ample foliage for the animals, which consisted of horses, cattle, sheep, and goats. Each one served a purpose. The horses were used for work on the farm and for pulling their buggies, the cattle for milk and beef, the sheep for wool and meat, and the goats for their milk.

  At that thought, one of Dat’s favorite verses to quote came to mind. And thou shalt have goats' milk enough for thy food, for the food of thy household, and for the maintenance for thy maidens.

  With the animals they raised, along with Dinah’s penchant for growing an impressive vegetable garden, and their several fruit trees, they practically lived off the land. Of course, they still shopped at a nearby store or two for other items they required which couldn’t be grown in their Midwestern climate.

  Like sugar. But Joseph supposed they could even get along without that if need be. His father had always kept a few beehives so they’d have honey year-round. Dinah often used it instead of sugar when she baked bread. The wheat they grew every year was grounded up for flour.

  It never ceased to amaze Joseph how Der Herr continued to provide for all their needs. It seemed like God had just set everything up in the beginning, put mankind in charge, and let nature take its course. A cycle that reproduced over and over. It was truly a remarkable thought.

  It was no wonder his father had wanted so many kinner. There was no way he’d be able to tend to this farm all on his own. The men did a lot, but he had no clue how they’d ever get along without Dinah making their meals and tending to their laundry and such. He supposed that Dat would need to marry again if their sister ever got a notion to find another husband and begin her own family. But perhaps she was satisfied with what the Gut Lord had provided for her. After all, Joseph had never heard her complain. And up until he’d given her the flowers, he’d never seen her cry.

  Jah, she must be content. The thought brought him comfort.

  “Remember, Joseph.”

  Had his father been speaking to him this entire time he’d been lost in his thoughts?

  “Sorry, Dat. What did you say?”

  “I was saying that how you live your life is between you and Der Herr and no one else. We must always strive to not just do what is right, but to do better.”

  “What do you mean, Dat?”

  “Don’t just do what is required. Do more. You will never be sorry for doing more.” His father handed him a wrapped candy. “And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.”

  Joseph smiled and popped the soft caramel into his mouth.

  His father took his wrapper and deposited both his own and Joseph’s into his pocket to throw away later. He reached down and picked up a few pieces of stray garbage that had no doubt been blown into the yard by recent winds. “This is what I mean.”

  He stared at the fast food wrapper in his father’s hand. “Garbage?”

  “Yes. Don’t be the kind of person that drops garbage on the ground, taking away from the beauty Der Herr intended for us to enjoy. And don’t be the kind of person who sees the garbage on the ground and walks by and leaves it there. Be the kind of person who stops and picks the garbage up. In this way, you will leave everywhere you go a better place. In this way, you will be making a difference.”

  “I don’t mind throwing my own trash away, but I don’t know how I feel about picking up other people’s garbage.” He frowned.

  “Joseph, we must strive to be like Der Herr. He picks up other people’s garbage all the time.”

  “He does?”

  “Jah, but the garbage Gott picks up and discards is called sin. He takes our sins and He removes them from us as far as the east is from the west.” Dat found a plas
tic shopping bag on the ground, then deposited the other trash inside. “So when you stop to pick up a piece of trash, remember what Der Herr has done for you.”

  Joseph reached down and retrieved a half-broken empty bottle. He deposited it into his father’s trash bag. “I will. Denki for teaching me that, Dat.”

  He looked around, amazed at how much prettier the property looked without the garbage present.

  “That’s what fathers are for.” Dat smiled, then scratched his beard. “It may seem like a simple thing. But all the simple, seemingly insignificant things become the big things in life. Like Der Herr says in His Word, ‘He that is faithful with little will be faithful with much.’”

  Joseph nodded.

  His father continued, content to offer his sage advice. “Everything we do should reflect our love and commitment to Gott. He tells us that in everything we do, we should do it with our whole heart—with unyielding devotion, as to the Lord and not unto man. And that whatsoever we have done unto one of the least of these, we have done it unto Him. Der Herr must always be front and center of our lives. Never forget that, Sohn.”

  Joseph briefly wondered if Dat had ever had this talk with his older brothers. If so, they hadn’t heeded his instruction. Nee, they seemed to do the exact opposite.

  He determined in his heart that he would be different. He would take Dat’s advice and live according to it as best as he could.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  “Guess what, Dat. I had the most interesting dream.” Joseph helped himself to the dish of scrambled eggs in the center of the breakfast table.

  He ignored his brothers as they grunted and rolled their eyes.

  “Another one?” At least Dat seemed interested. He rubbed his beard, sipping on his coffee.

  “Jah. It was weird.” Joseph continued. “It was like I was some prince or something and everyone came and bowed down in front of me.”

  One of his brothers scoffed. “Oh, yeah, I can see it now. Oh, hail, mighty Joseph!”

  “Jah, like we’d ever bow down to you.” Another of his half-brothers chuckled. “Wow! Someone is full of himself.”

  “It was a dream.” Joseph frowned at his brothers’ mockery.

  “Some fantasy in your mind, no doubt.” Simeon laughed.

  “Joseph, it is best not to speak of these things.” His father advised.

  “Jah, keep your stupid dreams to yourself,” Dan said.

  “It’s not stupid!” Young Benjamin spoke up in his defense. “I like to hear about Joey’s dreams.”

  “Benjamin, nee. Do not repeat the words that your brothers say,” Dat reprimanded, sending disapproving looks to Joseph’s older brothers.

  “But what do you think it meant, Dat?” Joseph persisted.

  “Don’t mind your dreams, Joseph. They’re just dreams, nothing more.”

  “But I—”

  “He said to shut your trap.” Dan growled. “Don’t you know what that means, dummkopp?”

  “Joey ain’t dumm! He’s real schmart.” Benjamin insisted. “And he’s nice.”

  Joseph smiled and winked at his little brother. At least he had one advocate.

  “Dan,” his father warned.

  “He won’t shut up. Can’t we just eat in peace without him blathering on and on? I’m tired of him and his foolishness.”

  Benjamin spoke up again. “Joey didn’t say nothing wrong. You guys are the ones who say mean stuff all the time.”

  “Benjamin, just eat your breakfast, Sohn.” Their father sighed.

  ~

  After Benjamin had left for school, Dat addressed Joseph’s brothers.

  “I’ve heard tell that you boys have been out drinking again.” Their father’s stern eyes frowned at each one of his older brothers.

  “Joseph, you little snitch!”

  A few curse words spilled out several of his brothers’ mouths.

  “Enough! You will do Joseph’s chores for the rest of the week.” Jacob turned to his daughter. “Dinah, your brothers wish to wash the dishes for you tonight as well.”

  “Ugh!” One of his brothers pounded the table as he forced himself from it. “I hate you, Joseph.”

  Dinah gasped at her brother’s bold words.

  “You take that back right now, Dan!” their father demanded.

  Dan turned back from the doorway. “No, I won’t. It’s the truth. Everyone hates him and you know it. You treat him like he’s a king and we’re his servants. If you had it your way, we would all be bowing down to the great and mighty Joseph!”

  “That’s not true!” Their father insisted.

  “Jah, it is.” Another one of his other brothers spoke up.

  “Who just got a new horse? Who got a brand-new saddle? Who just got a brand-new courting buggy?” Dan demanded. “See, I told you. And now, because you’ve treated him like he’s some priceless diamond, he seems to think that we’re all going to bow down to him. Well, I certainly won’t!”

  Joseph watched as Dan stormed out of the house. Shortly thereafter, the rest of the brothers followed suit. How on earth was he going to live in the same house with his brothers if they hated him so much? Maybe it would be a gut idea to find himself a fraa quickly.

  CHAPTER SIX

  “Joseph, I’d like you to go take this food that Dinah made out to your brothers.” Dat handed a bulky Igloo container to him and a large bottle of water on a sling.

  He eyed it, determining whether he could balance the ice box on his saddle and ride at the same time. Jah, he could. The bottle of water would be fine across his torso, although he wasn’t used to riding with extra gear.

  His brothers had been working on the property Dat owned that was furthest from the house. It would take him some time to get there by horse, but he was certain Freckles would do just fine. She’d been a right gut horse.

  “I wanna go too, Joey!” Benji protested.

  Joseph tousled his little brother’s hair. “I’m afraid we both won’t be able to fit in this saddle. Not if I’m taking this stuff along. Maybe next time, jah?”

  “Besides,” Dat interjected, “I have a very special project we need to work on together.”

  Benjamin’s eyes grew like dandelions in spring. “Really, Dat? What is it?”

  “It’s a surprise.” Dat winked at Joseph. “I’ll have to tell you after your bruder leaves.”

  “Well, it looks like you better get going, Joey.” Benjamin grinned.

  Joseph chuckled, sticking his boot into the stirrup. “You’re right. But I want to see what this surprise is all about when I get back.”

  ~

  Joseph kissed the air to prod Freckles further. He was more than ready to divest himself of the load he carried, although his brothers appeared to be nowhere in sight.

  The cattle grazed peacefully on the hills, not even lifting their heads in acknowledgement of his presence.

  Had he heard Dat wrong? Perhaps he’d gone to the wrong property. He thought back to what he’d been told. No, he was in the right place, for sure and for certain.

  The farmer next door raised a hand in greeting. Joseph gently flicked the reins and guided Freckles toward the end of the property line where the man stood, tending his small vegetable patch. It was tiny in comparison to the garden Dinah raised every year and the produce seemed to be half the size. Jah, she could probably teach this man a thing or two.

  “Have you seen any young men around here?” Joseph asked as he came near the fence that separated the two properties.

  The man nodded. “Sure did.”

  “Do you have any idea where they may have gone?”

  “I believe I overheard them talking about a swimming hole or something. They took off in short order. There were two buggies, a car, and a motorcycle.”

  A car and a motorcycle? Dat would not be happy when he heard about this. His brothers knew better. When would they ever grow up and start acting like responsible adults? They all should have joined the church by now and begun their own families. N
ot that they weren’t entitled to a little fun every now and then. But it wasn’t just every now and then. Did they realize their uncouth behavior gave the entire family a bad name? Hadn’t Dat and Dinah already suffered enough ill repute because of their misdeeds? Sometimes, he felt like the responsible, older child.

  Joseph frowned. “Did you see which way they went?”

  The neighbor pointed down the road, opposite the direction Joseph had come. Who knew how long it would be until he found them? But Dat had asked him to complete a task and he intended on doing his part. Dat would have enough disappointment to deal with concerning his brothers. He certainly did not need to add to his father’s burdens.

  “Denki.”

  Joseph turned Freckles around and urged her in the direction the neighbor had pointed. He’d heard of a swimming hole out this way. Hopefully he’d be able to find it before Freckles became too winded. The last thing he desired was to overwork her.

  He carefully followed the buggy tracks on the road, searching for any sign of a buggy turning off on a side road. It had been quite a while, but he seemed to remember a swimming hole that Dat had taken them all to when he was younger. Could this be the same one? He attempted to recall whether there were any distinguishing features about the place. He remembered a long rope hanging from a big tree that they’d swung out into the middle of the water on. Jah, it had been a lot of fun.

  Several miles down the road, he noticed where the buggy tracks had turned. There wasn’t just one or two sets of tracks though. No, by the look of it, his brothers came down this road quite often.

  He continued down the unpaved road for about a mile until he came upon the trail that led to the swimming hole. He heard his brothers’ voices hooting and hollering before he could see any of them. Sure enough, there were two buggies and a motorcycle. But there was no car, like the man had mentioned.

  He slid off his horse and carried the ice chest and water to where one of the buggies were parked and noticed several beer cans littered among the ground. His brothers wore only their undershorts as they frolicked in the water.