I Was a Teenage Weredeer (The Bright Falls Mysteries Book 1)

by C. T. Phipps

  “Good,” I said, before realization I might have condemned my parents to a horrible death washed over me.

  Oh, why couldn’t I keep my big mouth shut!

  The entire forest was then bathed in the brightest red light I’d seen yet. Like the vision of the past, I saw my family sitting down tied up in the center of the lumber mill next to a bunch of old saw blades. They were covered in sweat, their clothes dirty, and there was a nasty silver burn on the side of my father’s face. Jeanine’s clothes had been torn so her bra was still visible and she looked like she’d thrown up on herself before she was gagged.

  My mother had an inverted pentacle drawn on her forehead in blood. I suspected it was designed to keep her from using her powers. Jeremy, by contrast, was just staring forward with a dead look in his eyes. Harvey Chang was standing over them with a silver chain wrapped around his right fist. I could smell the verbena it had been soaked in, something which worked on shapeshifters like acid even as the silver prevented it from healing properly.

  “Now they will die,” Victoria said, her voice echoing in my mind. “Your fault.”

  “No,” I whispered.

  That was when Dave walked up toward them, as if in a trance, and lifted up a hunting rifle to Jeanine’s head. Except he stopped in mid-step and didn’t pull the trigger. I blinked and heard the entire forest had gone quiet. The vision seemed frozen in place but so did everything else.

  “What the?” I asked, turning to my side and seeing my group looked every bit as confused as I did.

  Except for Alex. Alex was holding up the lighter he’d bought at Kim Su’s. “This was used to give a dying soldier one last cigarette by his lover in the platoon during Vietnam. It contains a minute of time. Go.”

  “Can’t the Big Bad Wolf affect time?” Emma asked, looking up.

  “Yes,” Alex said, trembling. “I am putting everything I have into holding it into place.”

  “Let me help,” Lucien growled. “Please.”

  “You’re needed,” Alex said. “Because the monsters will come soon. I have seen it. I may die, I may not. My foresight is crap. Go Jane, save your family. The others will cover you.”

  I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude as well as relief. I shouldn’t have, since it was very possible this would get Alex killed. I wouldn’t let that happen. I would make sure everybody lived. Somehow.

  “You really are a miracle worker, Alex.” I focused on transforming into the biggest, toughest-looking doe imaginable. That result wasn’t that intimidating, but I would take it over my normal deer form.

  “Not even close,” Alex whispered under his breath.

  I took off as fast as I could for the lumber mill, making it impossible for him to hear the next part of my statement. It was possibly the last words I’d ever exchange with the beautiful FBI agent. Even so, just about everyone else followed and while they didn’t move as quickly, I knew they were coming to fight with me.

  We were going to slay the monster.

  Or die trying.

  Chapter Thirty

  I smashed through a wooden door by kicking it open with hooves that had the strength of several men before lowering my head and walking into the lumber mill. The sights and smells that greeted me on the other side assaulted my senses, making me nauseous.

  The Big Bad Wolf’s spirit realm and physical reality had merged here, even more so than in the Lodge. The walls bled profusely from every crack and tear in the concrete while I felt the sides exhale like lungs before breathing in fetid air from an invisible swamp. Apparently, Alex wasn’t strong enough to stop everything from moving and I prayed to God and Goddess both that that still applied to my family.

  The machinery was twisted and deformed like a Rube Goldberg device (or Mouse Trap if you remember the board game). The saw blades hung from string all around like wind-chimes while conveyor belts moved up and down in twisting patterns. Some hung from the ceiling while others led nowhere.

  “So…” I said, frantically searching for my family. “Silent Hill rather than Resident Evil.”

  The flesh monsters were frozen in place all about, staring in every direction with no sign of awareness. On the second floor, overlooking the blood and sawdust soaked floor was a beautiful woman in a slit black evening dress. It took me a second to recognize Sheriff O’Henry dressed up in Victoria’s homecoming dress. She had her hair up, was wearing jewelry, and had makeup on too. I had to reevaluate my opinion about her looks since she was quite fetching dressed up, even if Alice still blew her away.

  The Big Bad Wolf turned to me. “You should have brought me the knife, little girl.”

  “Who said I didn’t?” I said, having put it in my back pocket. “I’m just not going to let you have it.”

  The Big Bad Wolf screamed and I was blanketed by a chilling gold. I would have found it hilarious, the Big Bad Wolf actually able to huff and puff to blow people’s houses down, but it didn’t seem terribly funny right now.

  Ignoring the breath even as it caused frost to appear on my flank, I jumped on top of one of the conveyor belts before jumping to another in a game of leap frog before getting around them to see where my parents were held. The image was identical to the one the Big Bad Wolf had projected into my mind. Dave was aiming his gun at a terrified-looking Jeanine while Harvey stood over them, ready to beat them some more with silver. I charged toward them, only to see time resume its progression.

  Dave aimed at Jeanine’s head. “Goodbye, pretty deer lady!”

  “No!” I screamed.

  “FEATHER ATTACK!” Maria cried out again, flying over my head and hitting Harvey in the face with two of her glowing feathers.

  The crow’s magic caused Dave to fall backward before Harvey pulled out a .45 caliber Magnum, aiming it at my father’s head. I slammed into him, head first, and sent the deputy flying through the air and against the wall. I didn’t know if I’d killed the man, but didn’t particularly care in that moment.

  Back at the front of the lumber mill, I could hear the rest of my group arrive and the most grisly of sounds echoed. The flesh monsters were attacking with both Lucien as well as Emma engaged in battle with them. I also heard the sound of gunfire. That told me Deana and Gerald were fighting too. A part of me was terrified that Emma was going to get herself killed. She wasn’t a trained fighter and was doing this all for me. I had to suck it up and focus on getting my family to safety. Transforming back to human form, I ran to Judy and cut her bonds first. I ended up using the sacrificial knife, which felt like a terrible idea, but I didn’t have much choice.

  “I am so angry at you right now,” I said, shaking my head before pulling her gag out. “Are you okay?”

  “Destroy the seal!” Judy shouted.

  I was about to rub off the blood off her forehead when another gust of wind struck us. It sent me flying through the air along with my siblings and parents. The ice cold air blasted my face and arms before we landed with a thud against the wall behind us. I was terrified of them having been impaled on a saw blade or piece of jagged metal but saw everyone was alright, though Jeanine was screaming something at me from behind her gag. I cut her bonds then handed her the knife before stepping over their bodies and going to face the monster that had attacked us.

  I saw her.

  Or, more precisely, it.

  The Big Bad Wolf had manifested fully and appeared as a giant nine-foot-tall glowing-eyed monster. It didn’t actually look like a wolf that much anymore. Instead, it was a kind of horrific sallow-skinned, tumor-ridden, thing that just so happened to be vaguely canine. Alex was right using all of its magic to warp its surroundings had mangled the god badly. It reminded me of—and I couldn’t believe I was thinking of this right now—Tolkien’s description of Morgoth. The Valar had expended so much of its essence to corrupt the land that it was no longer remotely what it once was. What it was, though, was still damned intimidating.

  I lifted up the Merlin Gun. “Go ahead, make my day.”

  WITH
OUR COMBINED STRENGTH, WE SHALL DESTROY IT. The Merlin Gun’s thoughts filled my head and they were all of bloodshed as well as destruction. I also felt it gathering energy; that meant the Merlin Gun probably wasn’t capable of killing it outright.

  “I slit the throats of every one of you,” Victoria’s voice spoke, except it sounded like she had a mouthful of gravel. “I shall not stop after you are dead. I will sacrifice the descendants of every single person involved in the massacre of my beloved. I shall become more than I ever was and lift my children to godhood.”

  Emma bolted past one of the conveyor belts beside it and came up beside me, still in wolf form. “Victoria, no! You don’t want to do this!”

  “I think we’re a little past that,” I said, only now remembering we were supposed to take the Big Bad Wolf down without killing Clara.

  SHE IS A NECESSARY CASUALTY OF WAR.

  Shut up, Gabriel.

  I AM NOT EVEN CLOSE TO HIS POWER.

  The Big Bad Wolf stared down at Emma and took a step forward. “You betrayed me! You have led my enemies here to kill me!”

  “We’re not your enemies!” Emma howled.

  That was a lie, but one I wasn’t going to correct her on.

  “Jeremy loves you!” Emma said. “Jeanine loves our brother even though he’s being a dick. You’re possessing Clara and making her into a monster! Don’t you see this thing is every bit as bad as Grandpa?”

  There was a flicker of hesitation as the Big Bad Wolf seemed to stumble for a moment and I blinked, surprised Victoria had that much control. I was also surprised that Emma’s words had managed to reach her.

  “I don’t hate you!” Emma said, capitalizing on her advantage. “I know what you did for me now! Clara can help you! We can help you!”

  The Big Bad Wolf put an enormous paw over its snout as if struggling with something inside it. Then its eyes lifted up and they were glowing red with hatred.

  “Uh-oh,” I said, the Merlin Gun screaming at me to fire but I couldn’t.

  Wouldn’t.

  That was when the Big Bad Wolf brought its enormous paw around and knocked us into the air. I think Victoria and Clara were fighting back, since otherwise we would have been crushed underneath it.

  “I am the Earth and the North Wind’s own child!” the Big Bad Wolf shouted. “The ground beneath me is my flesh and the trees my fur!”

  I stood up despite the fact that I felt like my leg was broken and would need another minute or two to heal. I clenched my teeth due to the pain but stared at the monster anyway. “Yeah, well, right now you have a face only a mother could love. How does she feel about you being a murderous piece of garbage?”

  The Big Bad Wolf roared and would have charged me, except that Lucien smashed through the conveyor belts behind me and latched his enormous gator jaws around the demon’s neck. The dragon breathed flames all across it, clawing and mauling its side. The fact that it was technically Clara in there didn’t make me feel bad about it.

  KILL IT, the Merlin Gun commanded.

  “Can you help me drive it out?” I said, wishing to God I had some magical support here. I’d been hoping to get Judy’s help. “We can save Clara and kill this thing. Maybe even free Victoria’s soul. There has to be something not skanky-evil about her if my brother liked her. Probably.”

  My leg’s bones popped back into place.

  Goddess and God dammit!

  I DO NOT PROTECT, I ONLY PUNISH.

  “Great,” I said, growling. “No wonder Alex left you.”

  The gun grew very hot in my hand and I briefly wondered if it was going to reject me. The gun started to cool, which made me think snark didn’t rank very highly on its list of sins. Unfortunately, as I debated what to do next, Lucien was thrown from the Big Bad Wolf’s back and knocked away by an enormous paw. He landed right beside my mother, who was free and now carrying the sacrificial knife.

  Oh no.

  “If I give you this son of the Drake family, will you let my family go and trouble this land no more?” Judy said, lifting up the knife underneath Lucien’s throat.

  Lucien turned back into a human in response, only for her to grab him in a headlock and hold the knife steady.

  The Big Bad Wolf looked over at her. “Yes. We have an accord. I have no wish to see you or your insolent offspring ever again.”

  “No!” I screamed.

  “It’s for the greater good, honey!” Judy called over.

  I lifted up the Merlin Gun and aimed it at her. It glowed bright and hot and I knew it recognized her for what she was. “He came here to save Jeremy and Jeanine! Shamans are supposed to protect people!”

  Judy stared at me then looked at Lucien, who was keeping his eyes closed and his throat exposed, then dropped the dagger before stepping away.

  “I’m sorry, Jane. I…”

  “Shut up,” I said, having lost virtually all respect I had for my mother in an instant. “Grandpa Jacob would be so disappointed in you.”

  I wish I hadn’t said that but it was true. The Merlin Gun stopped wanting to kill her, though.

  “Pity,” The Big Bad Wolf said. “The dagger is mine, though.”

  I threw down the Merlin Gun and stared at him before shouting, “Get out!”

  The Big Bad Wolf’s form shimmered a second and some of the tumors on its body disappeared. “You are not strong enough. You will be less strong once I have frozen you solid and shattered your remains.”

  “Get out!” Jeanine shouted, having managed to get herself free.

  “Get out!” Emma shouted, having no magic except what she was born with, but joining her power to ours anyway.

  “I also say get out,” Maria said, standing in raven form on top of one of the rafters. “By the way, I’m converting from your worship. You suck as a god, like Jane said. I’m thinking of trying Unitarianism.”

  “Get out,” Judy said, whispering. “You have ruined enough lives.”

  The Big Bad Wolf gradually became something much more wolf-like until it was a beautiful shining red-and-black lupus that shrank to the size of Emma’s form. It was visibly in pain and I saw its eyes continue to glow. The Big Bad Wolf was still inside her.

  I picked up the Merlin Gun and walked toward the demon-possessed wolf. “Victoria, I know we’ve never been friends. Hell, I didn’t like you before you were possessed, but you are stronger than this thing. Protect your sister one last time.”

  The much-smaller wolf spirit was pulled from Clara’s body by a ragged-looking translucent-white Victoria dressed in the homecoming gown I’d seen their host in earlier. Her mascara was smeared and there were red claw marks all across what I could only assume was her soul. The Big Bad Wolf was fighting her, but reacting more like a cat that didn’t want to be put in a crate than a god.

  I aimed the Merlin Gun at the monster. “I’m sorry, Vicky.”

  “Just shoot it,” Victoria said.

  I pulled the trigger and the glowing bullet passed into the Big Bad Wolf’s side as Victoria’s ghost faded away into a bright light. There was a look of profound relief on her face and I hoped Heaven worked like Return of the Jedi with last-minute repentance being a way in.

  NOT MY DEPARTMENT, the Merlin Gun said.

  The Big Bad Wolf didn’t die immediately, hissing and thrashing on the ground while the wound glowed a brilliant orange hue. I lifted the Merlin Gun and fired again into the side of its head. Because it was a spirit, a headshot didn’t do any more damage than a shot elsewhere would have, but it caused the monster to scream out. No great gusts of wind or frozen air came out this time, just a small cloud of ice. I walked over and pressed the gun right between the monster’s eyes. The third bullet did it. A good thing, because I only had two left. The lumber mill shook and all of the gravity-defying weirdness around us vanished, transforming the place into just another junked-up abandoned building. The air lost its foul stench and a great spiritual weight I hadn’t even realized was there vanished.

  “Ding dong, the wolf is
dead,” I said, not exactly feeling like celebrating.

  JUSTICE IS SATISFIED, the Merlin gun spoke. AWAKEN ME AGAIN ONLY WHEN THERE IS SOMETHING WORTHY OF DESTROYING.

  “You got it, chief,” I said, intending to put it in a box and bury it in the woods with hopes of never seeing it again.

  “Jane—” Judy started to say.

  I raised my hand. “I think it’s best you communicate through Dad for the next, I dunno, awhile.”

  Lucien climbed to his feet and walked past me. “Everyone is all right. I’m linked to my people. Gerald and Deana are wounded but will heal.”

  “And Alex?” I asked, terrified that my beautiful FBI agent was dead.

  “Fine,” Lucien said, not bothering to look at Judy. “You should take him out for cherry pie.”

  I didn’t comment on the fact he was a lot more of an honorable person than my mother had proven to be. That made me more inclined to overlook the fact he was a drug dealer. “What about Judy?”

  Lucien looked back at my siblings staring at Judy in confused horror. “We’ve done enough.”

  Epilogue

  Marcus O’Henry’s office was nice enough that if it wasn’t inhabited by a complete monster, I might have dragged a sleeping bag into it and lived there. It was larger than many apartments, with enormous bookshelves along the wall, lush green carpet, and a huge antique oak desk covered in paperwork. The crowning part of it, though, was it had a gorgeous glass window view of the town’s titular shining white falls. My ears were capable of hearing their rush down from the cliff face Pinehold was built over even though the window was designed to be soundproof.

  The Old Wolf himself was sitting behind his desk with a pen and writing on a yellow pad. He was wearing a white button-down shirt, suspenders, and a pair of glasses which told me the Gordon Gecko look was deliberate. I supposed that made him a literal Wolf of Wall Street. Marcus didn’t seem particularly troubled by the week’s events and didn’t acknowledge me when I opened the door to walk in.