Surviving Passion

by Maia Underwood

  “What does comfrey do?” Gina inquired, watching with morbid curiosity over Selena’s shoulder.

  “Just helps the skin heal faster, I’ll show it to you if you like,” Selena told her. “It’ll probably be safe to take this off in three days or so. Good for it to breathe. It’ll be a while yet before the stitches can come out. I still wouldn’t use that arm much for the next month. The deeper tissue could take longer to heal.”

  The door sounded and Selena held her breath. Peering discreetly around her hair, she saw Blaire come through the door, followed by Cal and finally Dan. They were soaked through, and each carried a bulging sack full of supplies. Selena held her breath as his eyes searched the room. When he found her, his gaze locked on while she took in his tall visage in the dim light. His short black hair dripped rainwater and his shirt clung to his skin, outlining the ample muscle beneath. She looked away. Her face burned as she wrapped Shane’s shoulder, but she could feel that his eyes hadn’t left her yet. It was as though they were the only two people in the room and she was naked again.

  “Thanks,” Shane told her cheerfully when she had finished.

  Selena had to clear her throat to say, “You’re welcome,” but even then, it came out little more than a whisper.

  Unsure of what to do next, she watched as the three arrivals hoisted their burdens onto the table. Selena took the opportunity to scoot behind them back to where Ben was sitting, knowing that Dan was acutely aware of every move she made.

  “That should do it,” Blaire announced, brushing her hands off.

  “How long do you think it’s going to last?” Selena asked Ben quietly, just to make conversation.

  “Ach, it’s a weird one, so no idea,” he told her honestly.

  “What about the animals?” she wondered aloud suddenly.

  “Let ‘em out,” Bear answered from where he sat against the wall opposite her. Susan was leaning against his shoulder, and their hands were entwined.

  “Will they be okay?”

  “We’ll see. Some of the chickens may not do too well if the water level gets too high, unless they’re smart enough to get up into the trees. Horses, cows, pigs’ll be fine. They’re smarter ‘n we are.” His eyes twinkled.

  She couldn’t suppress a smile. Blaire was right. He was a very huggable man. A huggable man bent on revenge, she remembered, appreciating the polarities of his character.

  While they talked, Selena kept an eye on Dan in her peripheral vision. He and Cal passed before her, pulling up two chairs and sitting near the door. He settled in next to Bear and Susan, facing Selena directly as they conversed about the remnants of Jake’s posse. She wished he wasn’t so close. She didn’t know what to do with herself. The raw memory of his body against hers was pounding her mind like the rain on the roof, and with him so near, it was impossible to distract herself. If she’d once thought that he was only physically inescapable, she realized now that she was wrong. Her mind was every bit as trapped.

  “Storm couldn’t have come at a better time,” Cal was saying. “Trail is gone and there’s no shelter out there for them.”

  Dan nodded, “Still shouldn’t let our guard down.”

  “No one’s getting anywhere through this!” Cal said, making a face as he gestured at the window.

  Selena glanced to her left and saw that Sara and Jimmy sat near one another. They looked like they were on speaking terms, and she was glad for that. It could have been a very long wait if there was any unpleasantness between them. Selena guessed that Sara was not the type to worry much about making a scene.

  A particularly violent wind rattled the windows and the kids jumped back. At once, several voices told them to move away. Becky went to her parents and plopped down unceremoniously on her father’s lap.

  “Dad?” she asked, looking dolefully out the window, “Are we going to have my party now?”

  “I don’t know, sweetie. Might be a little later than we planned. We’ll see. Maybe the rain will clear up by tomorrow.”

  But by night, things had only become worse. Their worry grew as the thunder and lightning became stronger and more frequent. Blaire had brought a few lanterns with her, and lit them so they could see one another.

  Selena managed to pass the time talking to Ben. He proved to be interesting enough to take her mind off of Dan by a small measure, so the two of them wound up trading histories. It turned out Ben had come from a Jewish family. Selena was unfamiliar with the term, but guessed that it was probably a religion. Her parents were agnostic, so she didn’t have much to say on the matter. She also learned that he had been separated from his family when he was ten. He explained that Brian, their old leatherworker, had sort of taken him under his wing. The two of them were actually the first people to settle here, before the others trickled in over the years, and that was why the place was known as Brian’s Crater. Ben explained that he spent a lot of time tinkering with the machines. They had no power, which made them useless. That was why he hadn’t felt guilty about taking them apart and examining their inner workings. He soon developed a fondness for making contraptions. The filtration system he had worked out was his pride because it was the most useful.

  “This storm is probably destroying it as we speak,” he complained sourly.

  “Will it be hard to rebuild?”

  “Nah.”

  Selena smiled but her progress with distraction was undone completely when Bear began to play with Susan’s hand affectionately. She responded with a feisty peck to his lips. The two were acting like a pair of teenagers, despite the many years they must have spent together. Their affections were hard to miss, and conversations nearby grew quieter.

  For Selena, the air was suddenly suffocating with tension, and she was grateful for the darkness as she reddened. Could anything make this more uncomfortable? she thought before superstitiously pushing the question from her mind. She didn’t want to look at him, but against her will and for some reason she could not explain, her eyes dragged themselves to Dan. She found him staring back at her, just as she’d guessed. Despite the pensive and searching expression that she saw there, his gaze was as piercing as ever. Selena’s eyes flicked away. It was awful being so near him when they couldn’t so much as talk about what had happened. Despite all her discomfort, she felt a momentary glimmer of satisfaction that his hands were, for once, as tied as hers.

  Over the next hour, the others drifted off to sleep one by one and the lamps were snuffed out. For a long time, Selena lay awake staring out the small window, listening to the thunder. Ben and Cal both snored loudly a couple of feet to either side. The room was so dark, it was impossible to see more than the vaguest outlines of the others until the lightning flashed across the sky, illuminating them brightly in short bursts. She couldn’t help but wonder if Dan was awake. She couldn’t stop thinking about how close he was. Floating in the dark outskirts of her mind was the knowledge that Clint was also near. At the moment, both of these powerful men were disabled, but regardless, she’d never felt more unsettled. In the face of all her tension, Selena’s sleep was surprisingly deep, but there were dreams. She was in a dark forest with vague, menacing figures surrounding her. She couldn’t say whether they were human or animal. Something snapped its arms around her from behind, and just then, a sound brought her abruptly awake from her nightmare.

  Breathing heavily, Selena tried to clear her head. Glancing to her left, she found Blaire at work sorting out what they would eat that morning. The storm continued to rage outside the window, reminding her of where she was and why. Getting her rapid breathing under control, she rose to help Blaire without a glance at the others in the room. The only way she was going to get through this, she realized, was by pretending that nothing had ever happened with either of the men.

  “Morning,” Blaire whispered so as not to disturb the others.

  “Morning,” Selena greeted back with a quiet yawn.

  “Well, you were right. This is a real bad one.”

  “How l
ong will the food last?”

  “Through tomorrow and maybe part of the next day, but if this thing keeps up that long, we’re gonna have a real big mess on our hands. The cellar with all our produce is full of water by now. We might have to bob for apples.”

  Selena cocked her head, “What’s that mean?”

  “Oh, just something that people used to do on Halloween. There’d be a barrel full of water and apples floating in it and you’d have to grab ‘em with your teeth. No hands.”

  “That’s weird.”

  Blaire chuckled, “Yeah well, we had a lot of weird traditions. All in the past now, though. Anywho, it’s the food I’m worried about. At least water’s not a problem. We’ve got a bunch of buckets outside.”

  “Always thinking ahead, aren’t you?” Selena complimented genuinely.

  “Part of bein’ a mother. So’s this,” she said stepping over to where her son Tim lay and giving him a shove with her foot. “Tim, wake up and bring in one of those buckets,” she rasped.

  The boy groaned and rolled over, rubbing his eyes before dragging himself across the hall and out the door.

  “He listens well,” Selena mused with a smirk.

  “Not nearly well enough,” Blaire said grumpily. “I should’a beat him more.”

  Selena snickered.

  “Where is that boy?” Blaire wondered aloud when they had piled a few more portions on the table. She turned towards the door and jumped back. “Jesus,” she hissed.

  Selena turned to see that Dan had been coming up behind them. He stopped and lifted his hands in a placating gesture.

  Breathing an exasperated sigh, Blaire muttered, “Makes you glad he’s on our side, don’t it?”

  “Sorry,” he offered diplomatically as she went out after her boy. To Selena’s surprise, Dan joined her to help with the food preparation. Some of the others were awakening and neither of them spoke. Standing there next to him while they focused on the menial task at hand, Selena felt strangely calm. Perhaps it was because she’d just woken up and her guard was down but, for the moment, she didn’t feel like a target.

  Blaire returned shortly with Tim close behind, muttering about having had to pee. She hefted the bucket of water onto the table easily and Selena couldn’t help wondering how heavy it was.

  “Some birthday for Becky,” Blaire said sarcastically. “But hey, at least everyone’ll be here for it!”

  Shortly after, the girl awoke and promptly pounced on both her parents.

  “It’s my birthday,” she announced matter-of-factly from Bear’s stomach. “Wake up!”

  “Here honey, can you hold this for me?” Bear asked, picking her up and setting her atop Susan. “Thanks,” he grunted, rolling over.

  “Hey!” Becky called indignantly before launching herself at him again.

  Susan looked on with a bemused smile before whacking her husband’s shoulder, adding, “Yeah c’mon Bear. Quit your hibernating.”

  “Nothin’ else to do! We should all be hibernating. Let’s try it,” he suggested with a yawn, and followed up with an obnoxious, feigned snore.

  “What’s hobernating?” Becky asked amidst her attacks.

  “Hibernating, sweetie,” Susan answered. “It’s something bears do during the winter. It’s like a sleep you can’t wake them up from.”

  “What if you did this?” Becky shouted, grabbing her father’s nose.

  “That might wake it up,” Bear conceded before roaring and grabbing the girl.

  Selena tried to get back to what she was doing as Becky shrieked and giggled crazily. Glancing past the end of the table she saw that although the family’s cacophony had roused everyone else, Ben was snoring peacefully. No wonder he had slept through the night of the battle.

  “How does he do that?” Selena wondered aloud, staring down at him.

  Blaire stepped over to have a look before snickering, “Well we all have our gifts. I’d like to trade him. He can be good at cooking and I could be good at sleeping.”

  “Yeah, I’ll trade too. I’ll sleep and he’ll make clothes,” Selena added.

  “Well honey, we might have to postpone your birthday,” Susan was saying. “Can’t do much with this nasty storm. We have a couple of things for you but they’re back at the cabin. We’ll just have to be patient.”

  “Aww!” Becky said, disappointed.

  “Speaking of clothes,” Blaire coughed.

  “Oh, now?” Selena whispered.

  Blaire nodded, “No time like the present, eh?”

  Dan snorted.

  “Okay,” Selena said compliantly before going over to her pack and fishing out the little bundle from the bottom. “I made you something,” she said cheerfully, walking over to where Becky sat, looking frumpy.

  “Ohh!” Becky cooed before she even knew what was inside. She jumped up and reached for it enthusiastically. She untied the thong and unwrapped the leather to find more leather, but it was laced with detailed stitches. She lifted the dress, unrolling it completely before letting out a squeal of excitement. “Lookit how nice!” she all but shouted, holding it up to her parents.

  “Wow,” they both said, frowning and leaning forward to take in the details.

  “Thank you, Miss Selena,” Becky said loudly. To her surprise, the girl came over and gave her a powerful hug, despite barely being able to reach her waist.

  “You’re welcome,” she replied quietly.

  “That’s amazing,” Gina said from the end of the room.

  “Yeah,” Shane agreed genuinely, “I didn’t know you could do anything like that with leather.”

  “Well Brian never made anything like that,” Jimmy threw in, “but maybe he just didn’t want us to think he was gay.”

  Selena blinked. It was the first time she’d heard him say anything, aside from the yelling with Sara.

  “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with bein’ gay,” Sara put in cheerily.

  “Clint agrees with you,” Cal said in a tone that meant he wasn’t just trying to be funny.

  “Fuck you, Cal,” Clint came back belligerently.

  “See?”

  “That’s about enough of that,” Susan said severely.

  “Sorry,” Cal told her with a mischievous half-smile that said he wasn’t.

  Selena returned to her work beside Dan and pondered the exchange. It would make sense that Clint and Cal wouldn’t get along, she realized. They both had an alpha male thing going on. The only difference was that Cal seemed to have some integrity. As long as they were in the same room together, Selena guessed there would be more of this. She silently wished they would fight it out and Clint would get pounded. Or killed. She felt guilty for having such savage thoughts, but not that guilty.

  Becky soon had her dress on and seemed totally oblivious to the bickering that had passed. Selena had to admire her handiwork. It looked even better when it was on the girl. Her happiness made all the hours worth it.

  When the portions were all laid out on the table, they took their food and passed the time eating and chatting with one another. There wasn’t much else to do. The storm raged on outside.

  To everyone’s relief and surprise, by the time evening drew near, it just stopped.

  Twelve

  Everyone filtered out of the hall, eager to survey the damage. The trees still dripped fat droplets of water as Selena and Blaire marched beneath them. The sky above was solid grey, but the clouds were high and thin.

  “I don’t think we’ll get much more rain from this one,” Selena predicted.

  “Well, thank the Lord. I was startin’ to get real itchy all cooped up in there,” Blaire admitted.

  They came upon Selena’s cabin first. To her dismay, there was a tree in it.

  “Jesus,” Blaire whispered as they drew nearer. “You’re stayin’ with me, honey. Don’t you worry about a thing.”

  “Thanks.”

  Selena woefully surveyed the destruction. The trunk had fallen against her porch and smashed the door, the stairs
and part of the front wall.

  “Our insurance bill is gonna skyrocket,” Blaire muttered.

  “Huh?”

  “Oh, nothin’. Just bein’ nostalgic,” she said with a hint of sarcasm.

  “What does that mean?”

  “Missin’ the old times. Never mind. Anywho, I hope there’s not a lot of important stuff in there because I don’t think we’re gonna have an easy time gettin’ inside.”

  “Well, I brought my stuff with me,” she replied, gesturing to her pack. “Old habit. Lot of leather in there, though. Tools, too. Damn.”

  “Let’s leave it for later and make sure I still have a cabin.”

  Fortunately, when they reached Blaire’s, it was in good shape. Selena felt secretly relieved that she would not be sleeping alone anymore. Clint wouldn’t dare trying anything with Blaire around, or at least she hoped not. Tim would probably be there if Blaire wasn’t. Between the two of them, she didn’t expect to be alone much.

  At the end of the day, it was clear that Selena’s cabin had gotten the worst of things. There were others with some roof damage, but aside from that, the cabins were in surprisingly good shape. The pond had swollen so much that Ben’s filter-pump system was nowhere to be seen. The animals were scattered and Bear said that it would take some time to round them up. The produce was sitting in a couple of feet of water just as Blaire had predicted, so she and Selena spent the last few hours of daylight moving it all to the kitchen.

  On several of their trips back and forth, Selena noticed Dan lingering nearby a little more than necessary as he worked. They hadn’t had a moment alone to speak, and she was sure he had things he wanted to say. Truthfully, she didn’t think she was ready to deal with him, so she stubbornly gave him no opportunity.

  When darkness fell, Blaire, Selena and Tim turned in. As they stepped inside, Blaire lit a lantern and walked her through the cabin.

  “We’ve got three beds. You can have my room for now and Tim and I will take the other.”