Defiance (The Protectors, Book 9)

by Sloane Kennedy

  I shook my head.

  “You sure?”

  “I’m sure.”

  “Good,” he said as he placed a soft kiss on my lips. “Because I need inside of you so badly right now…”

  His words dropped off and I felt him stroking my hair. I nodded. “Yes.”

  I couldn’t manage anything else, mostly because of what I might end up saying. And as gentle and as sweet as he was being, I needed to remember this really was still just sex.

  Even if that little piece of my heart that I’d just lost to him wanted it to be so very much more than that.

  Chapter 16

  Vincent

  I should have been able to stop. I should have been able to climb off of him, take him by the hand, and lead him back to the house. I should have been able to leave him at his door with a few words about how what we’d done couldn’t happen again…that things couldn’t, no, shouldn’t, go any further.

  I didn’t do any of that, of course. Not after the stunning man beneath me, eyes shining with a mix of satisfaction and renewed hunger, had spoken that one little word giving me permission to take everything he was offering. No, instead I began kissing him again because I just couldn’t get enough of how his mouth moved perfectly beneath mine.

  He gave.

  He took.

  He was with me one hundred percent and he put every part of himself into those kisses. I knew he was nervous; how could he not be? But it wasn’t enough to stop him. I’d given him so many outs that he could have taken any one of them and I would have let him walk away.

  But he was still here, his hard body pressing up against mine, trying to get closer.

  I could feel his cock growing hard against mine and I cursed the fabric separating us. I reared back and quickly climbed to my feet so I could shuck the rest of my clothes. I half expected him to just lie there, but he shocked me when he quickly scrambled out of his pants. I nearly tripped in my eagerness to escape my clothing, but when I saw Nathan’s hand move to his cock to begin stroking it as he watched me undress, I nearly came then and there.

  Fuck, how the hell was I going to stay in control long enough to make this good for him?

  I barely managed to remember to grab the condom and packet of lube from my wallet before I fell to my knees in front of him and just drank in the sight of him. Legs splayed, fingers gripping his rock-hard dick, chest rising and falling with heavy breaths, eyes twinkling with a mix of excitement and fear.

  “Nathan-”

  “Don’t,” he cut in, and then he was sitting up. “Don’t you dare give me another out.”

  His fingers curled around the back of my head and then he was pulling me to his mouth for a searing kiss. “I’m so very ready, Vincent,” he murmured against my lips. “I’ve been waiting so long for this…for you.”

  I knew I shouldn’t put more behind the words than he’d meant, but that was exactly what I did as I pushed him down into the grass and settled my weight on top of him. He might have meant he’d been waiting for someone like me, but that dark, lonely part of my heart that had appeared after I’d lost David chose to believe he really did mean me.

  I took my time kissing Nathan before I worked my way down his body. I let my fingers skim over the bruise on his side, but I didn’t let them linger because I didn’t want to be reminded of how close I’d come to losing him.

  Losing him?

  He wasn’t fucking mine.

  I needed to remember that.

  “Vincent, please,” Nathan cried out as I licked over the ridges of his abdomen, tasting both the remnants of his cum and the sweetness of the pre-cum that was streaming from the head of his dick. I looked up to see that he was on the verge of losing it. I wasn’t doing much better.

  “Turn over,” I said as I used my hands to urge him onto his stomach. He hesitated for the briefest of moments, likely because his nerves were starting to take over. But he did it, and I sat back enough so I could take in the sight of his gorgeous back and perfectly-shaped ass. I wished like hell I’d managed to talk him into going back to the house for this encounter because the light was fading fast and I felt like I needed hours just to get my fill of him visually. But it wasn’t like my dick was going to wait patiently in the wings.

  I settled over his back, leaving no space between us, my cock nestled against his ass. As I nibbled on the back of his neck and along his collarbone, I shifted my hips until my dick was actually in his crease. Enough moisture was seeping from the head of my dick that it only took a few glides between his firm muscles to distribute the natural lubricant.

  Nathan’s arms were folded beneath him, supporting his head. I stole kisses now and then, but mostly focused on letting my shaft brush back and forth over his hole. Within a matter of minutes, Nathan was humping the ground beneath him. Since I knew he’d likely end up making himself come that way, I forced myself to sit up and straddled his muscular thighs as I searched out the packet of lube. My fingers shook as I got some of the cool substance on them. I braced myself so that my face was near Nathan’s as I rubbed the pad of my thumb over his entrance. The position allowed me to see and hear the things he wasn’t saying. Not that he needed to say anything, considering his whole body had locked up tight as soon as I’d placed my finger against him.

  “Relax, baby. Just feel, okay?”

  He nodded and I felt him take in a really deep breath. I kept my touch light as I played with his opening. I placed kisses along his shoulder, neck, and cheek as I gently massaged him. When he began pushing against my finger, I knew he was finally letting himself enjoy the sensation rather than getting hung up in the anticipation of what was coming.

  I murmured inconsequential things in his ear, but it wasn’t until he turned his head and hungrily sought out my mouth that I knew he was ready for more. I kissed him deeply just as I pushed my finger inside of him. He hissed into my mouth and squeezed his eyes shut.

  “Just breathe, Nate,” I whispered as I stilled my hand.

  He nodded and did as I said. I’d only bottomed on a few occasions, but I still remembered my first time and everything it had entailed. David and I had still been incredibly young when we’d started having sex, so our inexperience had worked against us in a lot of ways. We hadn’t understood the concept of taking it slow and preparing each other…we’d just been too eager to be together in every way.

  As badly as I wanted Nathan, I wasn’t that naïve, inexperienced kid. I waited until Nathan’s body stopped fighting before I added a bit more pressure. Just as he tensed up again, I pulled my finger out a little and then pushed forward.

  “Fuck,” Nathan moaned.

  My heart surged into my throat when Nathan’s fingers suddenly closed around mine where I had my hand pressed against the ground by his head. I let him link our hands and then I leaned down and kissed him hard.

  “So fucking beautiful, Nate,” I said softly, and then I pushed my finger deep inside of him. Another guttural moan tore free of Nathan’s throat, but he kissed me back without hesitation. I was deep enough to search out the bundle of nerves I knew would change the game entirely. The second I rubbed over his prostate, Nathan let out a ragged shout and bucked his hips up against my finger. I managed not to plunge any deeper into him. As I began massaging him, he let out little grunts and groans.

  “Vincent, I need…I need…”

  I kissed him. “I know what you need, baby,” I said against his mouth, and then I pushed my finger all the way inside of him. He cried out, but not in pain. I pulled my finger out, then plunged it right back in.

  “Yes! God, yes!” he shouted as he tried to push back against me. I’d settled more of my weight onto his back, so I was truly in control now. I nipped, licked, and sucked every piece of skin I could reach with my mouth as I began finger-fucking him in earnest. He barely seemed to notice when I added a second finger. The words falling from his lips made no sense, but I understood exactly what he was saying.

  As much as I would have liked to make
him come again just by using my fingers, my body wasn’t patient enough. Nathan was young enough that he’d likely recover quickly enough that we could go for round three without too much preparation, but I wasn’t as certain of my own libido.

  Even though I was currently more turned on than I’d been in in a really long time.

  Maybe ever.

  I dropped my mouth to Nathan’s ear as I stilled my fingers in his ass. “Tell me you still want it, Nate. I can make you come like this,” I said as I pressed against his gland.

  He let out a harsh curse. “No,” he gasped. “You! It has to be you.”

  I understood what he was saying and was so damn glad that I gave him another hard press that had him stifling a cry of pleasure against his forearm. I eased off him and carefully pulled my fingers free of his body. It took just seconds to get the condom on and the rest of the lube slathered over my rock-hard shaft. I used my hands to split Nathan’s ass open, but it was too damn dark for me to see anything. I gripped my cock in my hand and maneuvered it to his hole.

  “Bear down on me, okay?”

  Nathan had gone tense as soon as I’d pulled my fingers out of his body, but he nodded in agreement. As I began putting pressure on his entrance, I felt him push back against me. He let out a ragged gasp as my crown slipped past his outer muscles. I carefully laid down over his back, my body covering his like a blanket.

  “So hot,” I said as I sifted my fingers into his hair and pulled his head up so I could kiss him. It was an animalistic move, one of ownership and dominance, but I didn’t care.

  He was mine.

  He’d been mine from the moment he’d told me yes.

  I let his body adjust for several long seconds before I slid more of myself inside of him.

  “Fuck,” he ground out.

  “Hurts so good, doesn’t it?” I asked.

  He nodded. “Need more.”

  I knew the sensations he was experiencing. Even as his body fought the intrusion, it wanted more. The stretch, the burn, even the pain to some degree.

  I slid farther into him as I kissed him hard and deep. “So perfect, baby. Like you were made just for me,” I whispered.

  He nodded.

  I wanted to believe it was agreement, but I knew I was reading too much into it. He was overwhelmed by what was happening to him. It could have been anyone doing this to him and he wouldn’t have known the difference.

  The thought made me unreasonably angry.

  “Open your eyes, Nathan,” I demanded.

  He immediately did and they locked on mine.

  “Whose body is this?” I growled as I bottomed out inside of him.

  Nathan let out a harsh moan, and I had to repeat my question. I knew I was being too aggressive as I kept his head at an awkward angle so I could see his expression, but it was like I was battling some unseen force.

  “Whose?” I repeated for a third time when I pulled nearly all the way out of his body.

  “Yours, Vincent!” he cried. “It’s yours!”

  I rewarded him with a hard surge that had him screaming in ecstasy. I released his head, but to my surprise, he kept it elevated so he could look at me. Something deep inside of me cracked wide open at what this man was giving me.

  So much more than just his body.

  His trust.

  His vulnerability.

  Him.

  God, I could see everything in his eyes.

  “Christ,” I whispered even as I began to thrust into him with hard, heavy drags. The pressure was so fucking intense that I was sure I wouldn’t last long enough to get him off.

  And those eyes.

  I needed to look away.

  This was supposed to be sex…fucking, damn it! Nothing more.

  I shook my head as I kissed him. Who the hell did I think I was kidding?

  “Need to see you,” I snarled, and then I pulled out of him. I had him on his back in one swift move. I used my arms to lift his legs high and wide and shoved into him hard, my body desperate for relief. Nathan’s body was splayed wide open as I began fucking him harder than I’d intended. But I saw no sign of pain or fear. His fingers were wrapped around my wrists where I had my hands planted on the ground next to his sides.

  “Can’t stop,” I tried to explain.

  He shook his head. “It’s…it’s not enough,” he admitted.

  The unexpected words surprised me.

  “Need all of you, Vincent,” he demanded, and then his hand was snaking up to grab the back of my head. He pulled me down for a kiss.

  And just like that I gave up and stopped trying to keep the last vestiges of myself apart from him.

  Chapter 17

  Nathan

  I was so fucking scared.

  By how good it felt. And not just the feel of Vincent’s thickness rippling inside of me.

  I’d known something was missing once I’d gotten past the pain of Vincent’s entry into my body. Along with the pain, there’d been the uncomfortable burning and stretching as my body had tried to accept his, but once it had passed, the only thing that had kept going through my mind as he’d begun thrusting in and out of me had been a singular word.

  More.

  A small part of me had shattered when Vincent had turned me over so he could take me from behind. I’d had no idea why it had mattered, but it had. And now that he was facing me, I knew why.

  Because face to face meant I could see everything. And I saw the exact moment Vincent stopped trying to hold himself apart from me. His gorgeous eyes had gone dark with more than just lust, and when I pulled him down for a kiss even as he continued to drive into me, I finally felt it.

  That more I’d been seeking.

  But not just more…everything.

  “It’s so good, Vincent,” I whispered against his mouth as I wrapped my arms around his hot, sweaty back. I felt raw and vulnerable. Somehow, I’d lost all control…of my body, of my feelings. Maybe that was why I’d needed to see all of Vincent. Maybe I needed to know I wasn’t the only one going through this.

  Vincent’s lips gently skimmed my jaw and then settled over the pulse point on my neck. He had to be feeling how rapidly my heart was beating. Like it was going to pound out of my chest at any moment.

  His fingers tangled in my hair, gripping me hard as he continued to plunge in and out of my body in long, smooth glides. Every few strokes he’d shift his body just enough so he could hit that spot inside of me that had me seeing stars.

  “Need to come,” I whimpered. I was so close, my body hanging right over the precipice. I’d had orgasms before, but this…this was so much more. It was like my body was finally waiting to be set free after so many years of being locked away.

  “Come, baby,” Vincent growled as he settled his mouth against mine. “Need to see you.”

  He was there with me. All in. And I loved it. His words were giving me so much more than permission to let my body feel something that it had been denied for so long.

  I could feel tears sliding from my eyes as Vincent slowed his movements and carefully slid the head of his dick against the spot. I began nodding frantically because my pleasure increased tenfold every time he did it. I locked my ankles around his ass, digging them into his flexing muscles as he surged in and out of me. My fingers scrambled for purchase along his hot, wet back.

  And then it happened.

  I screamed in relief as the coil of need inside of me snapped and flung me over the edge. I couldn’t speak or breathe. All I could do was feel as wave after wave of agonizing sensation flayed my body alive in the best way. I was dimly aware of Vincent murmuring things into my ear, but I couldn’t be sure of anything he actually said. His dick pulsed and throbbed inside of me as my body clamped down on his and then he was ramming into me hard, driving my pleasure higher in sharp, angry spikes.

  It almost became too much.

  Almost.

  But as Vincent yelled my name, my nickname, I managed to open my eyes. I saw the muscles of his neck
straining as he braced himself above me. His arms were once again holding his body above mine as he plowed into me, and I saw his eyes watching where our bodies were connected. I looked down long enough to see his dick spearing in and out of me. He let out an angry curse and then a shout of relief as he shoved into me hard. His body collapsed on mine and he wrapped his arms around my upper body, clinging to me like I was his lifeline. He jerked against me, his cock shoving into me in short, jerky thrusts over and over as he rode out his orgasm. Bursts of energy danced beneath my skin as my own orgasm continued to surge beneath my skin.

  I lost all track of time as Vincent fucked into me over and over. By the time his body slowed and all his weight settled onto me, I couldn’t move. I managed to hang onto him with my arms, but that was it. My breath was seesawing in and out of me, and I felt so hot I was sure I was going to burst into flames. Vincent’s length still filled me and every once in a while he’d let out a little moan as his body jerked inside of mine. I eventually managed to regain my senses enough to lift one arm enough to cradle the back of his head. I pressed kisses against his temple, but didn’t say anything.

  What was I supposed to say?

  Thank you?

  Those words were hardly enough for what he’d just done to me…given me.

  The sounds of the night returned slowly, as did the coolness of the ground beneath me and the mugginess of the air surrounding us. I knew we needed to go inside, but I was reluctant to move.

  Because reality was returning like a vengeful bitch who’d decided she’d been gone just long enough that you got to see what life could be like without her.

  Vincent shifted somewhat, and then he was using his arms to lift himself off me. He reached between our bodies and it was then that I realized I’d come without him or me even touching my dick. Vincent grabbed the edge of the condom and slowly pulled out of me.