More Than This

by Shannyn Schroeder

  He came from the kitchen carrying two cans of pop. He wore only his jeans, and they hung low on his hips. Delicious. His hair was unruly and she imagined that was as styled as it got any day. She felt frumpy in her T-shirt and shorts.

  She sat on the couch and picked up a plate. Her stomach growled so loud Ryan looked up. She felt her cheeks blush.

  “I’m not the only one starving.” His easy smile relaxed her.

  They loaded their plates with generous helpings of sweet-and-sour pork and Moo Goo Gai Pan, and settled in on the couch. Quinn pulled her feet up and crossed them, balancing her plate on her knee. Ryan held his plate at his chest and extended his legs to rest on the table.

  “Where does your name come from? Is it a family name or something?”

  Quinn groaned with a mouthful of rice. After she swallowed, she answered, “It’s kind of a long story. I don’t particularly like to tell it. It’s not cute or amusing. It’s not even interesting.”

  “Now you have to tell me. You and your sister have unusual names. I don’t even know what Indy is short for.” He paused to take a drink. “I assume she’s not named after Indiana Jones.”

  “No, though she might prefer it.” Quinn ate another big bite of chicken before beginning her explanation. She washed it down with a swig of Diet Coke.

  She blew out a slow breath, tired of the story. “First, you need to understand our father is very, uh, patriotic. He planned on having two sons. He really counted on it. The first would be named John, the second Quincy.” She paused, waiting for it to sink in.

  Ryan eyed her and the smile broke across his face. “John and Quincy Adams. You said it wasn’t funny. That’s pretty funny.”

  She resisted sticking her tongue out at him. “When Indy was born, he realized he couldn’t name her John. So he named her Independence.”

  Ryan’s mouth dropped open. “Where was your mother in this?”

  “Stopping him from naming her Freedom. Mom figured Independence would give her more choices for nicknames.”

  He nodded understanding. “Your name isn’t Quincy, is it?”

  She chuckled. “No, I was his next disappointment. Had I been a boy, I would’ve been John Quincy. Instead, he shortened it to Quinn. Even with the occasional gender mix-up, I think I got the better name.” She picked up her plate and continued eating.

  “Kind of crappy to know you were a disappointment just by being born.”

  She shook her head. “It wasn’t like that. I mean, my dad loves us. He always wanted a son.” She lifted a shoulder. “Don’t all men?”

  Ryan slid his back against the arm of the couch to face her. His long legs extended under her crossed legs and touched the other end. “I guess so. Every guy has an image of fishing or playing catch or wrestling in the yard with his son.”

  Quinn had a quick mental flash of shirtless Ryan tussling on the living room floor with a young boy. He would be a fun dad. “Your turn.”

  “For what?”

  “Tell me about your siblings. You have a boatload, but you haven’t told me much.”

  “You thought your story was long? It was nothing.” He put his empty plate on the table. “Colin is the oldest. We’re Irish twins.”

  “Huh?”

  “We’re only a year apart. Basically, Mom got pregnant with me right after having Colin. Because we’re so close in age, people would see us together and think we were twins.”

  “Oh.” There was another one of him?

  “Colin dropped out of the picture for the last few years, but he just blew back in. You’ll see him around. He’s working at the bar.”

  “Which one?”

  “Both. Wherever I schedule him. Michael is next in line behind me. He’s the fireman. You’ve seen him at O’Leary’s. Liam comes next. He’s a chef at Porter’s downtown. He’s making a name for himself and wants to open his own restaurant.”

  “Are all of you single? You haven’t mentioned any wives or kids.”

  He smiled crookedly. “Much to my mother’s dismay, we’re all single. Michael has been with the same girl for three years now. I think they might be the first.”

  “Four boys in a row. You’re all close in age?”

  Ryan nodded. “The biggest span is four years between Michael and Liam.”

  “I can’t believe your parents kept going. Your house must’ve been insane. Did your mom want a girl?”

  “Actually, it was Dad who wanted a girl. But we’re also Irish Catholic. No birth control. Moira came after Liam. She’s a reporter for the Herald in the ’burbs. Maggie is the baby. She’s still in school working on some creative writing degree. No one knows what she’ll do with it.”

  “Quite a household. Are you all close?”

  “Pretty much. We don’t talk all the time. We have our own lives, but we get together for Sunday dinner with Mom after church at least once a month. They all pitch in if I need extra help at the bar. Everyone works Saint Patty’s Day. It’s tradition.”

  “I think I’m jealous. It must be cool to have a big family.”

  “It has its moments, but there are pitfalls too.”

  “Like what? I can see the fighting and stuff as kids, but as adults, it must be like having your own crew of friends.”

  “Sometimes.”

  He got quiet and Quinn knew something was bothering him about his family. “Why did your brother drop out of the picture?”

  His eyes darkened a fraction and she knew she hit the right nerve. “When my father died, he left O’Leary’s to me. Well, my mom is still part owner, but it’s mine.”

  “Colin wanted it?”

  “It should’ve been his. He’s oldest and Dad counted on him to take over. But Colin’s a fuck-up. Always has been. Lucky for us, my dad saw it before he died, or O’Leary’s would be history.”

  She stood and began closing containers. Ryan followed her lead and took their plates to the kitchen. “Are you mad he’s back? Didn’t you miss him?”

  “I missed my brother, not the trouble he brings.”

  There was more to it than some trouble. A deep, simmering anger rose beneath the surface, but he tried to conceal it. The sun had begun its descent, so Quinn turned on the light over the counter. Ryan eyed the clock on the microwave.

  “Need to go?” she asked.

  He leaned against the counter. “Not yet. But Mary has a lot to set up for tomorrow. I didn’t plan on being gone this long.”

  Her eyes widened. “You mean you didn’t plan on coming over here to seduce me and screw my brains out?”

  “It wasn’t on my agenda for today. I thought maybe we’d have lunch.”

  She leaned into the refrigerator and placed cartons on the shelf. “We certainly had more than that.”

  When she stood and closed the door, Ryan pressed against her and kissed her full on the mouth. He pulled away and they were both slightly breathless. Quinn knew it was now or never. She wouldn’t find the guts again to ask him. “I have a serious proposition for you.”

  His hands roamed her body. She knew she didn’t have his attention, so she grasped the sides of his face and brought it close to hers. “Will you consider being my sperm donor?”

  In an instant, his face went from aroused to confused. “Huh?”

  “I’ve told you that I plan to get pregnant in the fall. I’ve looked at a bunch of options. It’s important for me to know the sperm donor is a good person. Like you said, anyone can lie on a piece of paper.”

  “You want me to get you pregnant?”

  “Not conventionally. You’d just give me sperm in a cup and the doctor will do the rest. You wouldn’t have any other involvement.” Her stomach churned as she questioned her sanity. Hadn’t she been afraid of losing him as a friend? Judging by the look on his face, this was like a shove out the door.

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  She shrugged as if this was no big deal. “Don’t say anything. I know it’s a huge decision. Will you give it some thought?”
<
br />   “Okay.” His phone rang and echoed from the bedroom upstairs. He groaned.

  “Shouldn’t you answer that?”

  “It’s probably my family.” He trailed more kisses down her neck.

  The phone rang again. He lifted his head. “I guess I better get it. It might be Mary. You can come to the bar and keep me company.”

  He doesn’t want to go. “Thanks, but I have stuff to do here.”

  He pulled away, his fingers lingering at the base of her skull. “Okay. You know where to find me if you change your mind.”

  She nodded, helpless to answer. He jogged upstairs to get the rest of his clothes and she filled the sink with water. She was suddenly lost again in a field of sex and friendship, not knowing which path to take. She feared she might’ve made a huge mistake—maybe more than one.

  Quinn wiped her hands quickly on her shirt and picked up her cell phone. She sent a brief text message to Indy.

  Had sex with Ryan. Help.

  She turned on the radio and sunk her hands into the water. The song playing was familiar, so she sang along and didn’t hear Ryan come back into the room.

  “You’re a good singer. You should’ve taken the stage.”

  Her hands froze in the sudsy water. She’d never sung for anyone. Not since she was a kid. Having Ryan walk in was like being caught dancing naked in her living room. Her muscles filled with tension.

  Ryan came up behind her and rested his hands on her hips. He kissed the side of her neck. The warmth of his hands spread across her hips to her center. She inhaled his masculine scent and she relaxed. His kiss ended with a nip on her earlobe.

  She almost leaned back into him, wanting more, but she stopped short. He needed to leave. Their romp was fun, but over. They needed to get back to the real world.

  “I’ll call you later.”

  “Okay.” She didn’t turn around. If she did, she might ask him to take her back upstairs. That would be a mistake.

  Right after the door closed, her cell phone chirped. A text from Indy.

  R U Kidding?

  She responded with a no.

  B there soon.

  Good. Indy to the rescue. She would know what to do and how to handle this. She knew what to do with most men.

  The enormity of Quinn’s request for his sperm weighed in Ryan’s chest. He had no idea how to respond to her. He supposed if he had a really good friend who couldn’t get pregnant, he might think about donating sperm, but this was weird. What would they be? She didn’t want him to be the father; she’d said she only wanted sperm.

  He looked at his phone. For a change it hadn’t been his family who had interrupted his day, but Mary, at the bar. Ryan called to find out what emergency needed his attention. Couldn’t he even get one afternoon away?

  “O’Leary’s.”

  “Hey, Mary, what’s up?”

  “Oh, thank God it’s you. I’ve got a bar full of people talking about getting free drinks. I have no idea where they came from. They say they’re participating in a pub crawl and they were promised a free drink with the flyer.”

  “What pub crawl?” he asked as he got into his car.

  “Your guess is as good as mine, but the natives are getting restless. What do you want me to do?”

  “Shit. Offer them all a free beer. Nothing else. Tell them there was a mistake on the flyer. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” He stepped on the gas. This had Colin’s name all over it. He said he wanted to learn the business. What bullshit.

  Pushing through the front door, he couldn’t believe the crowd. He got behind the bar and asked Mary, “How’s it going?”

  “Most are pissed that I’m only pouring beer, but they’re taking it. What the heck’s going on with this? How am I supposed to set up for tomorrow with this crowd? I was counting on the usual business tonight.”

  He patted her arm. “Don’t worry. We’ll get you set up. This won’t last long.”

  She moved away to continue to gather flyers and pour beer. They worked side by side for an hour before the crowd dwindled. Grabbing one of the flyers, he leaned against the register.

  NEW ADDITION TO THE PUB CRAWL.

  FINISH YOUR NIGHT AT O’LEARY’S.

  FLYER ENTITLES HOLDER TO ONE FREE DRINK.

  He eyed Mary. She looked beat. Her shift had ended a while ago, but as usual, she stayed because he needed her. “Have you seen Colin?”

  She stopped wiping down the bar. “I think he’s in the back room. He was here earlier, but I haven’t seen him in a while.”

  “Okay. Go home. Tomorrow’s a big day. Jenna can handle the bar.”

  “See you tomorrow.”

  Ryan walked around the bar and headed toward the back. If Colin wasn’t still there, he’d track him down. Luckily, he didn’t have to look far. Sitting at a table, surrounded by drunks, his brother waved to him.

  “Hey, Ry. Great crowd tonight, huh?”

  “Yeah, great.” He nodded to the other guys at the table. “Can I see you in the office for a minute?”

  “Sure.” Colin slid from his seat and loped toward him. It seemed the man had only one speed—snail.

  Once in the office, Ryan began to pace, trying to rein in his temper.

  “What’s up?”

  Ryan held out the crumpled flyer. “What do you know about this?”

  “Last night I heard about this pub crawl that was starting at McGuff’s. It’s a tour of Irish pubs in the area. People were going from bar to bar. I asked around and thought it would be a good way to drum up business for a slow Monday night. I met the crawlers at McGuff’s and handed out the flyers to bring them here.”

  Ryan inhaled deeply. His brother had been trying to do something good. He couldn’t help that he was selfish and didn’t think before he acted. “You should’ve checked with me first.”

  “I get that this is your bar. But it’s a family business. I took some initiative. What’s the big freakin’ deal?”

  “The big deal is that you brought a ton of people into the bar without warning, offering them free drinks. At the end of a pub crawl. These people only showed for the free drink. It’s a Monday night. They have to work tomorrow. They’re not staying and spending their money. They took their free drink and left. By my estimation, you just cost me money.”

  Colin’s face dropped.

  “This is exactly what got you into trouble with Dad. You don’t think. You just do whatever the fuck sounds good. You said you wanted to learn the business. Here’s your first lesson—in order to make money, you can’t give away the product.” He turned and sat on the edge of his desk.

  “I was trying to help. Mondays are slow. I thought bringing in more customers would be a good thing.”

  “If they were spending money, it would’ve been good. Now in addition to losing money and pissing people off because they got a free beer instead of whatever top-shelf liquor they thought they were going to get, Mary’s exhausted and she’s got to set up for her speed dating tomorrow night.”

  Colin shoved his hands in his pockets, not making a move toward the door.

  “Go home. I have a bar to run.”

  “I’ll help. What do you need me to do?”

  “You’ve done enough.” Ryan was suddenly exhausted. He scrubbed a hand over his face as he watched Colin leave. He couldn’t keep cleaning up after Colin. Part of him wished Colin had stayed wherever he’d been. At the rate things were going, he’d never be able to have his own life; he’d be too busy fixing Colin’s screw-ups.

  CHAPTER 13

  Quinn finished washing dishes and went to check her e-mail while she waited for Indy. Three notices from her online profile. She could potentially set up three more dates. The thought of the last one soured the idea.

  One e-mail from Mr. Carlson asking her to stop by Tuesday, if at all possible. She’d have to think about it. How bad could it be? Summer school hadn’t even been in session for two weeks.

  Another e-mail from O’Leary’s confirming her attenda
nce plus one for speed dating on Tuesday.

  Her phone rang. The machine picked up. No message. Cell phone rang. Nick. She pushed the phone to the side and resisted the urge to answer it.

  The doorbell rang less than a minute later. She debated answering it. She dialed Indy’s number instead.

  “Why are you calling me? Buzz me in.”

  Thank God. Quinn hit the buzzer and unlocked her front door. The landline rang again.

  “Hey, babe. It’s me. We haven’t seen each other in a while. Thought maybe we could get together. I miss you.”

  Indy entered at the last sentence. “Please tell me that wasn’t Nick.”

  Quinn nodded.

  “At least you didn’t pick up. You’re improving.” She shut the door behind her and kicked off her heels. She fell onto the couch. “Now tell me what happened.”

  Quinn curled up on the opposite end of the couch and told the story, beginning with her photo shoot. Had it really been less than twelve hours ago? It seemed like weeks.

  She offered only the briefest highlights of the phenomenal sex, but Indy understood.

  “That good, huh? Number eight crossed off the list?”

  “And then some. If I had to sum it up, all I could say is Hoo-doggie.”

  Indy burst into an outrageous laugh. “I haven’t heard that since we were kids. He must be something to pull the hillbilly out of you.”

  Quinn let her smile say it all.

  “So what do you want help with? Sounds like things are going great.”

  Quinn blew out a deep breath. “Yes, the sex was great, but I need to find balance or boundaries for the friendship.”

  One of Indy’s eyebrows rose. “You think after today you’re still just friends?”

  “Yeah. It was weird in a good way. We ate together, talked about our families, and cleaned up. We hung out, but it wasn’t uncomfortable at all.”