Lightning Forgotten

by Lila Felix

  Ari leaned over and translated for me. Translated was a stupid word. I was just uncomfortable with the subject matter—I wasn’t speaking another language.

  “No way. There is no freaking way. I mean there is a way, but that doesn’t happen, does it?”

  Ari laughed, watching Colby. “She’s gonna blow!”

  I braced myself for whatever that meant.

  “Not really, Collin. Calm the hell down. I’m not going to explode. You’d just love that, wouldn’t you? All boys like explosions and blowing shit up.”

  Regina whispered to one of her cohorts, “We just thought she was sassy before.”

  No one else in the room knew what we were talking about, but Malynn was interested since she was the main one trying to fix it. She was staring at us and had forgotten whatever she was conjuring.

  “They think I’m knocked up, Malynn.”

  The street slang was lost on the woman.

  “Preggers, pregnant, bun in the oven, baby in the belly.” Colby was smiling, at least.

  “Oh… oh! No, you’re not pregnant. I’m sorry.” Malynn did a little bow of reverence.

  “Don’t be sorry. I’m so relieved. Can you imagine bringing a baby into this? And how do you know?”

  Malynn once again pointed to her temple as she did when her gift was questioned or misunderstood. “You and Theodore’s children are yet to come. It is not the time.”

  Colby sobered. “Children? There’s more than one of those things to come? Theo needs to put it away.”

  I looked to the heavens and begged them to make her stop.

  Ari asked, “What else? What else can it be, Malynn?”

  She glided through the tent, carrying a cup of something that smelled like brimstone and backside. “I’m hoping this will help. If not, I have a few more options before I try other things. I’m hoping it is something simple.”

  Colby sat up. “Does that taste like it smells? Because, if so, this waif thing might be okay after all.”

  Malynn smiled. “Trust me, the taste is heaven. Ignore the smell.”

  Colby grumbled to Ari. “By heaven, she means Hulk’s crack.”

  Nothing would stop that sarcasm, but at this point, I was almost glad to hear it.

  Malynn didn’t hand the cup to Colby. Instead, she lifted it to her lips. Colby was not pleased to be fed like a child, but she accepted it. After the first taste, she even seemed to like it.

  “It’s not bad.” She smiled peacefully and continued to drink, losing her posture to slouched shoulders and waning eyelids.

  It was disconcerting to watch her slip into sleep like that, coaxed by whatever was in that cup.

  It was what I would liken to watching someone’s pain medication take effect or like a mother pulling a warm blanket up over a child—softly and so slow in its steadiness that the patient hardly noticed they were being taken under.

  “Is she okay? I don’t like this.” Ari was holding onto Colby for dear life. Tears pooled in her eyes as she looked at her friend, both of them helpless.

  “She is fine. Check her pulse. It is steady and slow. This should have her sleep for a while. When she wakes, she should be hungry.”

  Ari said, “Back in the states, we call that pot.”

  “Ari,” I admonished in a hush.

  “What? That’s what it sounds like—not that I’ve ever partaken.”

  Ari wasn’t a very good liar. Or maybe she was and I didn’t know it yet. I was in trouble with that one.

  “Ari, sweetheart, let’s put her to bed so she’s not disrupted.”

  Ari looked at me, broken. “I don’t want to leave her. I don’t want her to wake up alone again.”

  The first lesson I learned from Ari was true friendship. She was an honorable female who, through the sarcasm and humorous jabs, would lay down her life for her friends. And it wasn’t a one-way street. Colby, and even Theodore, would do anything and had done anything to keep Ari and me out of danger. They were working to make sure all Lucents were free from harm and from Sanctum.

  That was friendship. It wasn’t keeping score or basing love only on the good times. It was accepting a person for who they were and loving them even when who they were wasn’t pretty.

  People had ugly moments and ugly phases.

  But if they were our friends, we loved them through it. We let them hold us at a distance when they needed to and close when they needed that as well.

  Ari’s ability to be the best friend was what first made me love her.

  She was the most loyal person I knew.

  She taught me, through actions, not through words, that loyalty wasn’t just when you liked the person—it was also when you hated them, when they’ve pissed you off, and when they hated themselves.

  Loyalty was for a lifetime.

  Malynn piped in, “She will not wake up alone. I will be with her. Spend some time with your mate, Ari. Like Theo, you are no good to her when you are worn so thin. I won’t leave her for a second—believe me.”

  Ari looked at me to gauge Malynn’s response.

  “She’s right, Ari. We should take this opportunity to let her rest properly. Malynn won’t leave her. The Clandestine are true to their word.”

  Ari let two of the men carry Colby’s almost-lifeless body to her room. It was only when Malynn took a seat next to the bed that Ari relented her charge to Malynn’s care.

  “You honor the Eidolon with your care of the queen. We may need to check your lineage, Ariana. There is probably some Clandestine in your veins.”

  “Thanks.”

  We went to the room we were given to sleep in the night before. It was not as divine as the Eidolon’s chambers, but I expected no less. Ours was a mix of maroons and teals. Our bed was a simple but comfortable pallet on the floor.

  “You need some sleep, Ariana.”

  She turned, stretching out her back, and gave me a wry smile. “You heard that, huh? Ari is so much more badass.”

  Apparently, badass was something my mate strived for. I’d let her believe it for a while.

  “But Ariana is so much more beautiful. Both are fitting for you.”

  She did a few yoga poses, trying to loosen her muscles. She did that every night and first thing in the morning.

  I soaked her in like a plant absorbs sunlight, growing in the knowledge of everything she did.

  “Stop staring. You’re creeping me out.”

  Ariana was a liar. From now on, in my head, I was going to call her Ariana.

  “Is ‘creeping me out’ what the kids are calling it these days?” I loved to use our age difference as a point since everyone else seemed to tiptoe around the issue. “I mean, I am an old man, but…”

  Ariana looked over her shoulder and winked. I thought my chest might burst every time she winked at me. She knew it. She knew what it did to me.

  I’d allowed my age and the profession I’d grown into shape the way we had courted in the beginning.

  Until Ari had kissed me.

  She joked and said that if she hadn’t, I never would’ve.

  And I would not have. I was taught that those things were reserved for mated couples—not that I ever expected to be a part of one.

  But she was mine.

  And I belonged to her.

  “Get down here, female. You’ve been away for far too long.”

  “I’m coming. Hold on.” She went behind a small screen in the corner and came out wearing one of my white T-shirts. Only a hint of a pair of shorts peeked out from underneath. She was incomparably beautiful like this—in a way that she didn’t allow anyone else to see—hair down—makeup free—not giving a damn, as she liked to say.

  “Creeping me out was not a compliment. But I was just kidding,” she said, bending down and lying next to me on the pallet.

  We lay next to each other, just enjoying breathing the same air again. Even though we had been back together for a day or so, being near her after so long apart felt like coming home. We talked about all
the places we’d been since we split up, and I told her all about the California beaches. She slapped my bicep when I explained the kind of swimwear, or lack thereof, I’d seen on the beaches.

  She told me she’d found the best coffee on the West Coast.

  “I can’t flash, but you can take me with you, right?”

  She nodded. “We’ll go everywhere, I promise. But what are you going to do? I can work—Lucent work, but you said you wanted to find something else to do.”

  I had thought about it. While I was alone, all I did was think about it. Although Ari’s work would sustain a home and eventually a family, I didn’t want to feel useless. I’d spent enough of my time holed up and alone.

  “I think I’m going to work at a library. I would like that. There are libraries everywhere, right?”

  She nodded. “Let’s live somewhere with a huge library.”

  I’d already thought of that. “The New York Public Library is enormous. At least from what I see on the computer.”

  There were always giggles from her when I said the computer instead of the Internet. She’d quit trying to correct me after a while.

  “I love New York. It’s the answer to so many questions.”

  I looked down on her. She had one lithe arm behind her head and the other hand was combing through my hair. Her eyes were closed.

  “What place have I never been to?”

  “New York City.”

  “Where would you like to move when all of this is over?”

  “New York City.”

  I sighed before asking the last one. I knew that she would stutter over the answer, just as I was over the question.

  “Where’s the perfect place to raise children?”

  Her eyes fluttered open and connected with mine. We hadn’t talked about it, but the world had been cracked open for me and it was all at my hands, anything I wanted—but what I wanted most was now in my grasp—Ariana and a family.

  She grabbed the collar of my shirt, pulling me in for a quick kiss and biting my bottom lip. “Duh. New York City.”

  Yeah, I loved this female with everything that was in me.

  I was awake, but my eyes were still closed. I knew where I was, but my fingers wouldn’t move. I was breathing and heard someone else, not Theo, breathing next to me.

  “Who is there? And I swear, if it’s Collin or Regina, everyone is fired.”

  It sounded plain as day in my head, but out loud, it was like I was winning a really good game of Chubby Bunny.

  A laugh rang out next to me, and I heard something shut like a book or a drawer. “I don’t know what you said, but it sounded hostile. The only person here is Malynn—me.”

  Malynn was cool.

  “Can you open your eyes?”

  I concentrated, but she must’ve sewed the damned things shut.

  And my mouth wasn’t working, so I shook my head against the pillow. I wasn’t even sure I had actually shaken it.

  “Well, if you want to eat, you have to open those eyes. My dad cooked some pretty good stuff for you.”

  My stomach answered for her.

  “Open those eyes. Let me see the blue. Our eyes are mostly brown, so we love your eyes. Oh, maybe that’s creepy. Sorry.”

  I focused on my eyelids. Finally, after a good three or so minutes, I made them open.

  “Aha!” Malynn clapped. “She wakes! How do you feel? Don’t sit up yet. There may be head blush.”

  The things she came up with were hilarious. Always only one or two letters from the correct word. I worked my lips together until they began to work.

  “Rush. Head rush. Ugh. Damn it. I could use a Slush Puppie.”

  “We have no puppies here.”

  When all this shit got straightened out, I was going to take Malynn on a U.S. tour to all the places she thought she knew but clearly didn’t.

  Ari walked in with the Viking and laughed. “Give me five minutes, B.” In less time than that, she was back with a cherry Slush Puppie in her hand.

  “He gave you a list?”

  She shrugged. “When we were in Portugal. He sent me this long-ass e-mail with everything you love and all the places to get Slush Puppies. It was insane. That boy knows more about you than I know about myself.”

  “Forward me that e-mail,” I said, taking one long drag of the pure sugar and Red No. 40 goodness.

  Red No. 40 was banned in most countries except America.

  Americans loved chemicals that mimicked crack in their bodies.

  “Mmmm… sugar.” I felt the little hyper nerves coming to life in my brain.

  “We have food for you. You’ve slept for three days.”

  I bolted up and gave myself not only a head rush, but also a brain freeze at the same time. I was just awesome. “I’m sorry, what? Three days? He’s not back, Ari?”

  Ari looked down and shook her head. Collin didn’t look pleased about it either, although they comforted me with their opinion that he should be back any day now.

  “I need…” I said, throwing the covers off the bed with the Slush Puppie going down with it. I tore out of the room. Every head in the main room turned toward me when I ran through and pushed the tent door open. I barely got outside before bending over and hurling… nothing but the little bit of red, frozen drink.

  After that, there was nothing in my stomach to come out, but it didn’t make me feel any less like my intestines were trying to expel the fifth horseman of the apocalypse and more.

  I could hear them behind me.

  She hasn’t eaten in days. This is something more than stress. Are we sure she’s not pregnant?

  Theo is going to kill me.

  She can’t afford to get much thinner.

  And Ari whimpering.

  It must’ve lasted an hour. I heaved and coughed until my body would no longer hold me up anymore. Both my abdomen and my throat felt like I’d eaten hot coals.

  “It made her rest, but her stomach is still off. I have more things to try before we begin looking at other options.”

  “Other options,” Ari repeated. But as Malynn began to unfold the answer—my knees buckled and my face hit the hot sand.

  ***

  For another week, Malynn tried concoctions of all textures and flavors. At one point, I thought she was giving me sips of camel’s piss from a teaspoon just to be able to say she was actually trying something different to heal me.

  Whatever the last thing was, it didn’t work either. There was a momentary lapse when the ebbing waves of pain ceased and I took advantage of it, asking for some bread.

  As soon as I swallowed the bite of unleavened heaven, it bit back.

  The pain from that little bite lasted until I could no longer tolerate it and blacked out again.

  I blacked out a lot lately.

  “Come on, Colby. Listen to my voice.” Ari sounded like she was faking a ghost sound.

  “There’s no need to sing. I hear you.” I groaned and then doubled over at the pain that sliced through me. “Shit, that hurts. What in the hell did Malynn give me?”

  I heard several voices talking back and forth.

  “Colby, I’m going to give you some more to drink. While you’re under, I’m going to dig into your mind. Is that okay? You have to give me permission.”

  I rolled to my right side but nodded. Even if she poisoned me at this point, it was better than feeling like I was being constantly stabbed.

  “I know it’s hard, but you have to give me permission out loud. Speak the words.”

  “Dig a grave in my head. I don’t care.” I think I said the ‘F’ word somewhere in there or maybe afterward, but noticed it didn’t really sound like me at all.

  Malynn began chanting something like a song—a lament. It almost sounded like a melodic prayer from one of those monks.

  Just when I’d almost gone to that black place again, where there was no pain, only sleep and arrested time—I felt him.

  Theo was coming back. Tingles scattered over my skin. E
very hair on my skin rose with a prickle.

  He was near.

  “Theo,” I called. It wasn’t a question because there was no question that he was here.

  “I’m here.” One hand on my stomach and one on my forehead blotted out the pain, but not altogether. It was like a shot glass of water after four days of thirst.

  But a little help was better than nothing.

  “You have been gone forever.” I spoke the words but didn’t recognize the thought as my own. It was as if someone else was speaking through my mouth.

  “It’s not been forever, Querida. Only a week or so. Has she gotten any better? She looks worse.” He was asking someone else in the room. Unjustified rage built in me. He was here for me. He was mine.

  Why was he talking to someone else?

  Why did I still feel like I was in the dark and alone, even though I could feel his hands on me, giving me a candle in the darkness?

  “They’ve been trying to kill me.” The voice took the breath from my lungs and spoke again. It was as though my lungs were haunted with a vile ghost. I opened and closed my mouth, trying like hell to make my own sentiments come out. To tell him that it wasn’t me speaking. To tell him anything but the foul words that were being spoken.

  “Who has been trying to kill you? Malynn? Collin? Ari?” he asked me in earnest, the precious, trusting man. It probably hadn’t struck him that what I was saying didn’t belong to me at all. He trusted me about anything, and now my own mouth was betraying him. Malynn spoke, and a rupture of anger and jealousy ripped through me. How dare she speak to my mate? How dare she?

  Wait. I don’t feel that way. Malynn is here to help us.

  “We have done nothing but try to help her, Eidolon. I swear it. I would never do anything to harm her. None of us would. I’ve tried to read this situation, but it’s cloudy—like this part of her life has been erased.”

  They hate you. It’s like I always said. But you didn’t listen to me, did you, Querida? Isn’t that what he loves to call you? You’ve never been the Eidolon’s mate—not truly. He was confused. He was lust-stricken. This is all your punishment for taking something that never belonged to you. It hurts, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it?

  A pain gripped my stomach like an iron fist squeezing the juice from an orange, but the orange was my stomach.