Lightning Forgotten

by Lila Felix

  Damn it all to hell. Either that bastard Sanctum was in my head or I was slowly turning into Sméagol—a bi-product of watching too much Lord of the Rings to impress Theo.

  It was Sanctum, I slowly realized, and heard a foul cackle that confirmed my fear. He was inside me—speaking for me—speaking as me. If Sanctum had told Theo right that minute to kill them all for hurting me, there was a chance he would believe my voice.

  Shit. I’m in deep.

  It wasn’t enough to have all this pain, I also apparently had to have the greatest pain in the ass of the entire world in my head…

  Sanctum, is that you? Why in the shit are you in my head?

  Oh, darling girl. What a foul mouth for such a beauty. Who do you think is giving you that stomach pain? The fever? The pain and anguish you haven’t even told them about? You didn’t want them to worry, but now it’s too late. They will only hear my words through your mouth.

  And believe me, it won’t be anything they ever saw coming.

  I thought Malynn only meant to treat Colby with herbs and general juju, but after Colby’s third or fourth rant about how they were trying to kill her and how Collin and Ari were devils… and how much she hated me for what I was doing to her… I relented to the syringe Malynn held in the air meant for my mate.

  “What is it?” I said, on the verge of madness myself, watching the degradation of my mate into some kind of pain-riddled insanity.

  “Something to calm her. I have tried all the regular things, so now it’s time to get serious. If we don’t get some calories into her soon, she’s going to wither away.”

  “You’re telling me you weren’t serious this whole time? What were you doing—just using her as a lab rat.

  She paled. “No, Eidolon… I would never…”

  I shook my head, hoping to clear it. Everything coming out of my mouth was beginning to sound more like Colby’s outbursts than logical. My eyes, I knew, were glassed over in making the choice before me. I didn’t want her to be knocked out, but at the same time, it was what was good for her.

  Anything that got her out of pain was good for her.

  Malynn put her hand on my arm. “Eidolon, I don’t mean to be harsh, but if we don’t get an IV into her with some nutrition, she’s going to die. I’ve seen her future, but that can change.”

  “Malynn!” Omar admonished her for being so blunt, but it was what I needed right now.

  She didn’t falter, squaring off her shoulders and speaking with conviction. “We owe him the truth above everything else, Father. I do this for him.”

  I looked down at Colby’s body, now a ghost of who she had been. I had to save her. My life would be nothing without her.

  I nodded, saying, “Do it. Give her the shot. Give her the IV and the other thing. Do it all.”

  “The other thing?” she questioned. Without hesitation, she jabbed the needle into Colby’s vein.

  I growled at having to repeat myself, but it had nothing to do with Malynn. It was the frustration that grew inside me like a plague. “Find out what the hell is going on. Do something, for the love of the Almighty.”

  Already, back-up plans were forming in my mind. Selfishness took over. I could take her to Paraiso myself. There would be no more need for suffering. The Almighty would accept her.

  I hadn’t even gotten to tell her what he’d told me.

  The life, violent as it had become, faded from her eyes as whatever Malynn had given her took over. I reluctantly moved out of the way so she could set up an IV and get fluids into her while we could.

  Colby didn’t move as the tube was shoved into her arm.

  Everything was desperate again. We couldn’t get around this life of fighting and running and constant desperation for something to just give—for something or someone to just give us a break. That was all we needed.

  If there were a damned wall in this place, I would’ve put my fist through it. But was there? No. There were only rugs and walls made of fabric.

  “I’m going to let her get a little stronger before I try to reach into her mind. Those women have been waiting for you in the main room. I’m assuming they know something or are up to something. I would be able to tell you which, but I don’t want to leave her yet.”

  I agreed with a nod and looked at Colby one more time before leaving. There was nothing I could do by watching her suffer—but I could go after the bastard that made us run in the first place.

  When I entered the main room, I’d thought the women of the Synod would be cowering in the corner. They were once my enemy.

  Or maybe they never were.

  I wasn’t sure anymore.

  “Eidolon, I know you have just recently returned, but we would like to have a word with you.”

  They called me by the title. I’d gotten used to it, finally, from everyone else, but hearing it from Regina was like hearing a hated teacher speak praise.

  It was just—weird.

  I waved her off. “It’s fine. Have you discovered anything?”

  They looked at each other. The one named Eliza cleared her throat.

  “Sir…”

  I interrupted. “Theo is fine. Formal titles aren’t necessary. Calm down, Collin.” I didn’t have to look behind me to know that he was going to interject some history lesson about how ‘The Eidolon shouldn’t be called by a nickname’.

  “I didn’t say anything,” he answered from behind me.

  “You didn’t have to. Now, Eliza, continue.”

  It took a few seconds for the shock to wear off. “We believe we have found either Sanctum’s hideout—or somewhere he once used as a place to hide. It seems he hasn’t been there in a while, but there are signs of a woman. We thought maybe the woman, Malynn, could get some vibes off it or whatever she does.”

  “What would be the signs of a woman?”

  Eliza cleared her throat. “There are women’s clothes there—dresses.”

  Even I wasn’t all that clear on what Malynn did, but I wasn’t sure even she could sniff a dress and find someone.

  “Where is it? Maybe I can go first and…”

  “Don’t even think about it, Theo.” Collin again—the rat bastard—always in my junk. I smiled in spite of my thinking. He was loyal to a fault. I was sure that, given the opportunity, he would put himself in front of a bullet for me.

  Hopefully, there wouldn’t be bullets.

  Sanctum probably didn’t even know how to use a damned gun.

  “As soon as Colby is stable, we will investigate that. Are there any other leads? Have you checked other places?”

  Regina showed me a list she had in her pocket, with some items checked off. They were being careful to go to the places at night, so waiting for time zones was an issue that left them here and stagnant for a while.

  “We are working on it. We will find him, Eidolon.”

  I hefted out a weighted breath—one laced with the weight of a thousand worlds—and nodded, acknowledging they were trying. Maybe they weren’t so bad after all.

  Or—they could be setting me up to be trapped by Sanctum.

  I told them I would go, but Omar would be going first to make sure The Synod weren’t, well, being the Synod again.

  That was what they were infamous for, after all.

  “Collin, Ari, can I see you for a few minutes?” Omar got up, ready to follow. “Alone, please?”

  Omar looked hurt. While I trusted him, I needed my friends at that moment.

  They followed as I walked outside, letting the hot night breeze warm my cheeks and body. It felt so cold with Colby not well.

  Everything was off with her not standing beside me.

  I made sure we walked out far enough not to be overheard.

  There wasn’t anything in particular I wanted to tell them. I didn’t actually know what I wanted. Yes, yes, I did.

  I wanted to lean on my friends when I was feeling like shit.

  Because seeing Colby like that felt like drowning in water that I’d fille
d the tub up with myself.

  “What is it?” Collin asked, standing in front of me. He was probably blocking the expression on my face and my lips from being read by those inside the tent.

  They didn’t need to see my weakness.

  They needed a leader—at least for a while.

  “It’s nothing. I—Colby.”

  “Shit,” Ari whispered. She grabbed Collin’s arm to move him closer while she wrapped her arms around my shoulders. The first tears since I’d been back fell. I didn’t know what to do. She was in there, almost lifeless, hanging on by a thread of morphine-induced normalcy. It was everything I’d never wanted for her.

  And with all the powers I had, there was nothing I could do to help the one I loved the most. Flashing didn’t help her. Sticking my face through windows and walls didn’t help her. And what the hell good were those powers or gifts if they didn’t help me now when I needed them the most?

  “What do I do, Ari? I can’t lose her. I can’t. I won’t.”

  She fisted my shirt at the shoulders. “We are not going to lose her. We—are—not. But I’m telling you, something hellacious is going down with her. She doesn’t feel those things she’s saying. I know she doesn’t. It’s impossible. Maybe it’s just the pain. Pain makes people say things that they otherwise wouldn’t. This could be something simple. I mean, we are in a tent—it’s not like we have state-of-the-art technology and hospitals. This could be something completely unrelated.”

  I knew all of those things, but it was good to hear someone else feel the same. This was why we were given Collin and Ari in our lives.

  I wiped the tears from my face with a good deal of violence. “Shit. I didn’t mean to cry. Damn it.”

  Ari winked at me. “It’s okay. I haven’t really seen you cry in a while. Not that you ever cried all that much. But if there was a reason to, your mate is a damned good one.”

  I let the salty, hot wind of the desert dry my face. I wished Colby could see the moon. The desert made everything clearer. Except how I could save my mate? Seeing the way the world rounded made me feel small—smaller than I already felt.

  “Let’s go back. I’ve been gone from her too long.”

  I went in. The two new lovers stayed outside, probably to make out. That was what I would’ve been doing with Colby if I was a regular person and if she was not on the verge of death.

  I got back to Colby. Malynn was next to her, on her knees, rocking back and forth, chanting and singing something that seemed to infuse the air with magic and soul. The air was different in that room, thick like syrup with emotion and heartache. The octaves coming from Malynn were almost holy—angelic in their rises and falls.

  Her father whispered next to me. “She’s calling out to the Almighty. Like you, her strength and her power comes from above. She asks him to attend her—to guide her so that she may help your beloved as He would wish it.”

  I nodded at Omar’s assessment and stayed still and silent, careful not to disrupt her.

  Her black hair and coffee skin glimmered in the light of the candles she’d lit. They were all shapes and colors, flickering back and forth as though the desert wind blew them from the outside.

  I had a feeling they weren’t just for decoration.

  Her prayers and songs grew more and more quiet and as they did, the rise and fall of Colby’s chest did as well. Her chanting seemed to lull Colby into relaxation.

  For a while there, Colby was breathing like one of those zombies from I Am Legend, and nothing was scarier than that.

  “She’s breathing okay now,” Malynn said, still hugging her own torso.

  Omar stepped forward so that he was standing shoulder to shoulder with me. “Her prayers are not regular prayers. They are songs, like those of David, from her heart to the Almighty’s ears. It’s not like us, where we think about other things or let our minds wander to the day’s events. She’s almost in a trance, a piece of time that no one else can touch. She started this when she was about three. We thought she was a little…” He made the swirling finger around the temple gesture for crazy. “Then she told us things that no one else could know. She told us that we should listen to my mother’s stories that day. So we all sat around and listened as she told us stories of how the Clandestine came to be. My mother died the next morning. That’s when we knew that she was something beyond unique.”

  Then, like a light switch had been flipped, Malynn stopped.

  “She is okay now. The pain is lessened and her breathing is better. I’ve put her into a coma of sorts. She gave me permission before, but I have to ask… Can I go into her mind—see what’s happening?”

  It seemed incredulous for her to ask me. Yes, Colby was my mate, but her body and her mind was her own. “If she gave her permission, then that’s all you need.”

  Malynn got to her feet. “I need to eat and get a little rest. I’ll come back in a few hours and begin. And… Theo?”

  I wasn’t the only one to notice it was the first time she’d said my first name.

  “Yes?”

  “It won’t be pretty. It’s going to be ugly. I may say things out loud that you don’t not want to hear—things she probably never wanted anyone to know. But we all have those demons, you know? We all have things that no one needs to know. We all have things that no one else wants to know about us—the little bit of devil inside. I will try my best to be quiet, but if I do, don’t think any less of her. Don’t hate me or her when this is over.”

  I touched Malynn’s shoulder before she could leave the room. “I would never hate you or my mate. None of us are perfect, especially me.”

  She smiled and looked back at Colby before going to take her rest.

  The place was a wreck. Those women had no respect for their own place of business.

  Oh, no, wait, that was me. I had no respect for the Synod or their snotty headquarters. That was why I’d called on the demon Theo stupidly gave back to me to shake things up a bit—like earthquake shake things up.

  They hadn’t been here in days, that I knew for sure. Their closets were bare, and there was rotting food in the kitchen. Walking around here was like taking a tour of a tomb.

  I knew where they were.

  They were with him, my golden child of a brother.

  And they were probably trying to find me.

  At least they didn’t know about Pema yet, and they wouldn’t.

  Grinding my teeth against the gnawing in my chest, I slammed my fist into the wall at the thought of them finding her. Plus, the fact that they had sided with him after everything we’d done for him—me and the devil himself.

  It was all falling to pieces.

  All of it—my plan—my ultimate goal of ending the humans—there was nothing left of it. And it was his fault.

  The one person I’d turned into a monster to defeat was, inch by inch, cutting off all of my plans.

  I had turned into him—the first Sanctum—the first Eidolon—all of them together. I was hiding in filthy places, trying to keep Pema and the fetus safe. I slinked in shadows and out of public places as though I was scared of him.

  Pema wasn’t handling it well.

  She was miserable, and hiding was bad for her health.

  All I had left was the hold I had on Colby and the powers that were ever growing in Theo. Which meant that there were more powers growing in me.

  My master was watching.

  He probably wasn’t pleased.

  I flashed back to Pema—in the cave on the side of the mountain that straddled Russia and Mongolia. It was a pathetic place to keep her, but it couldn’t be helped. I was powerless against whatever tactic they’d found to hide themselves. But we were exposed, or so I thought. They could find me in an instant.

  But if they could, why weren’t they?

  I was the rat that had, for so long, been the cat.

  And being prey wasn’t my jam.

  I went to the side of Pema’s bed. She didn’t get up when I flashed into the r
oom. I didn’t see how the female didn’t wake up. My wake was brighter and redder than I’d ever seen it, despite how much flashing I’d been doing. She was pale. The times she had looked at me lately, her eyes were glassy and her gaze seemed to go right through me.

  “Are you okay?” I asked. The question was foreign in my mouth. The only reason I cared was because of the fetus—the baby—whatever.

  She nodded, eyes still closed.

  “What’s the matter with you now?”

  She turned her head away from me. Her hair was getting longer. To anyone that didn’t know, it would seem like she had just cut her hair this short, but comparatively, it was longer.

  When she did speak, her voice could barely be heard. “I hate what you’re doing to Colby. If I had known, if I had known this was how it had to be, I would’ve denied you. You said this was your chance for redemption, but it’s just an excuse for you to torture her because she…”

  “Don’t say it. Don’t you ever say it.” I ground the words through my teeth, courtesy of a clenched jaw.

  “It’s true. I might not say it, but that’s what this is all about—always has been. I thought giving you a child would make you love me. I’ve never regretted anything more in my life.”

  I left her there with alligator tears falling down her face. Her belly had swollen a little, but there was still seven more months until the baby was born.

  I didn’t know whether I could take seven more months of this earthly hell.

  “There. Did you see it?”

  Collin was losing it too. I didn’t see a damned thing. All there was in this place was sand, sky, sun, and moon—there was nothing else. I’d gladly welcome the facade of a mirage at that moment—if mirages had Dr. Pepper and spicy Funyuns.

  “No. I’m sorry, Collin. What am I supposed to be seeing again?” I leaned against his side while his arm was draped over my shoulder. No matter who was chasing us or what lay ahead, I knew that Collin would keep me safe.

  He continued to stare into the sky. “It was like angry lightning. Red, bright as hell. It’s him. It was far away. To a human, it might look like airplane lights or one of their infamous UFOs. But it was him. I’d recognize that lightning anywhere.”

  “Sanctum? Why is his lightning red? Wait, can’t anyone’s lightning be red if they are angry enough? It could be anyone.”