Hardware

by Sara Brookes

  It was hard to articulate her feelings into words that made sense. She'd tried to do it herself and couldn't quite grasp the concepts needed in order to understand it. However, she wanted to try, for him. “I feel safe with the cuffs on. I was a bit surprised to discover that I'm not alone with what I like either.”

  “Ugol's Law.” He continued on when she looked at him oddly. “No matter how odd or bizarre your kink, there's always someone else out there who likes the same thing. While I've never personally been bound, as I like to be the one doing the binding, I've heard some people say it's a comfort. Like they don't have to think—they just follow the instructions given.”

  Her eyes widened in shock and shook her head. “Oh, no. I still think, even with the cuffs on, so I don't agree with that statement. Sometimes the anticipation heightens the sensation to make it better when something does happen.”

  “And the cuffs?” he asked.

  “Enhance that. Strangely enough, as I said, not what I expected to feel at all. I know wearing them everything is confined to that very moment in time, whatever is happening. I like the weight of them against my skin. Hell, given enough time, I could probably get off when simply wearing them and you doing nothing. Which is probably why I could never wear them all the time.”

  “Why's that?”

  Her gaze met his and she noticed his intense look as he waited for her answer. It wasn't hard to see that his mind worked over the thought of her as she wore the cuffs all the time. To her, the appeal of wearing nothing but the cuffs while he looked on for long stretches of time, was tempting. The edge that had dulled marginally throughout the course of the day sharpened again and she shifted in her seat. A cold sweat erupted on her skin as her cheeks heated. “It would remind me of sex with you too much. I'd never get anything done if that were the case.”

  He tapped his spoon on the table and smiled. “Well now, we can't have that. However, that does lead me to my next question.” He hesitated for a moment and took a sip of his coffee before he continued. “How would you feel about being collared?”

  “You mean like asphyxiation?” A series of warning bells sounded in the back of her brain. This was territory where she wouldn't hesitate to pull out her safe word. It hadn't been used yet as he hadn't found anything that made her think to use it.

  “No, of course not. That would be one of my hard limits,” he said in a rush and she sensed his panic at the tone of her question. “While I realize some people may find enjoyment in such a thing, I meant more of something to match your cuffs.”

  Allison eyed him skeptically and studied his face. He hadn't been totally honest with her. He hadn't lied, but something about the set of his expression and the sound of need she detected in his voice gave away the fact he talked about something that interested him. It was as if he wanted to gauge her interest in something before he voiced his next idea. “You know, something tells me you've already made the purchase—like the cuffs—they're sitting at the warehouse waiting.”

  “Very perceptive. Do you find you like that idea?” He didn't confirm her suspicions, but he hadn't denied them either.

  “Yes, I do,” she said quietly as she met his gaze with unwavering determination. It didn't bother her in the least that he'd purchased something for her again without consultation. She didn't mind being surprised and actually found comfort in being with someone who always wanted to explore.

  “Then yes,” he dropped the spoon and folded his hands together. “I recently purchased one for us. As always, the decision is entirely up to you.”

  She noted the use of the word ‘us’ in that statement. A warm glow started to come to life inside her. He truly meant it some time ago when he said this wasn't all just about him—it was about them together. Their likes and dislikes and about the journey they took together as they reached a place where they both found something enjoyable. “You're a complete gentleman, you know that, Patrick?”

  “Is that bad?”

  “No. No, I find I quite enjoy the contradiction you make.”

  “I'm assuming that's a compliment of a sort?” he asked with a bit of skepticism of his own.

  “Of course it is. At work, even on a date, you're a gentleman. You hold doors for other people, even pull out their chairs for them. Then you ask them how their day went and care about what the answer to that question is regardless if it interests you or not. Most men today completely forget about that sort of thing and to be perfectly honest it's probably our own doing. Women's lib and all that ‘I can do it myself’ type of thing. However, in the bedroom, you are anything but. I would never have guessed you were into this type of thing.”

  His mouth twisted into a frown. “I beg your pardon? I'm still a gentleman in the bedroom.”

  She'd offended him. That hadn't been her intention. “I didn't mean it like that. I meant the whole cuffs, collar and telling me what you want once we're in the room at the warehouse. Even when you had me secured to the cross. It's like once you step through the door you become a completely different person. Like you allow yourself to let go and truly be yourself.”

  He was quiet for a few minutes. A long enough stretch of time that caused her to wonder if she'd put her foot in her mouth. “So you're saying outside of that room, I'm not who I want to be?”

  She let out a sigh, relieved that she would get another chance to explain herself. She hadn't intended to explain this to him quite yet, but she'd already opened her mouth and there was no way to turn back now. “You are—in a way. But in that room you are truly free. You have slipped before however.”

  “I have?”

  She nodded and shot him a wicked smile. “At the comic book store and again on the phone last night. Even sometimes when we're together, you...say things most people wouldn't normally say out loud.”

  “Does that bother you?”

  He was certainly full of questions tonight. Not that she blamed him. She had sprung this on him out of nowhere when he'd asked a perfectly innocent question. “Not at all. And the answer is no, by the way. I've never worn—or even thought about wearing—a collar. That doesn't mean I'm not willing to. For you.”

  His expression softened and the worry melted away. “You do know just because I enjoy something I still realize that doesn't mean you will.”

  “Well, the same goes for me. There may be things I've yet to discover about myself that you may find don't interest you.” She exhaled a slow breath. “The point is that neither of us will know until we try.”

  Without a word, he tossed the napkin down on the table, pushed his chair back and stood. He offered his hand and her stomach jumped as she reached out and wound her fingers with his. They threaded their way through the busy dining room and he even kissed her fingertips as they walked. Once outside, he turned to her and brushed back a few strands of hair that had blown across her face in the slight spring breeze.

  “I agree, we won't. So, with that in mind, I'd like to take things a little further.”

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  * * *

  Chapter Fourteen

  Twenty minutes later, he unlocked the door to his room at Sanctuary. He reached into the small black box as he shut and locked the door behind them and Allison chewed her lip. A thick length of leather was his hands and her heart rate spiked in response.

  Based on their earlier conversation, she'd known what he had in mind, but had never actually seen one. The sight caused butterflies to flutter around in her stomach. This really was new. That trepidation melted away when the cuffs she'd worn before came out of the box. She shuddered in anticipation and those butterflies vanished.

  His thumb brushed against her cheek and realized she stared blindly at the collar. Gentle fingers blazed a trail over her jaw. At this close distance, she felt the heat of him cradle her. It kept her safe and made her feel loved.

  “Are you okay?” His voiced was hushed as he asked.

  She swallowed hard as she moved her eyes from the collar to his face. E
motion read clear on his face. He second-guessed himself and the next step they both agreed to take. Above all, she hadn't intended for that to happen. She'd meant what she said earlier, that she wouldn't know until she tried. “I'm fine.”

  “No, you're not.” He shook his head and pulled away. “Your pupils dilated as soon as I pulled this out. That's usually a sign you're afraid. We'll maybe try this some other time, all right?”

  This was new ground despite the places he'd taken her to recently. Someone actually cared about what she wanted. Their wants weren't priority and she was given a choice about whether to continue or not. It wasn't what she associated with the whole dominance and submission aspect.

  She realized why she reacted that way. He truly cared about her and how she felt. This wasn't a one-sided sexual relationship where one person cared only for what they wanted. The experience was for them both, not just him. Maybe she'd been wrong when she'd said he was more of a gentleman outside of this room than inside it.

  Her hands slipped around Patrick's wrists and guided the round collar to her neck. The expression on his face altered and she saw a sudden flash of hunger. There you are. There was the man she'd glimpsed a time or two. The one she'd seen that day at the comic book store. The one who so desperately tried to keep his control firmly latched so no one knew the truth.

  She fed off that energy and let it spread like warm fingers through her. Control was an easy thing to give him now and she felt comforted because he knew exactly what he wanted. She admired—and wanted for herself—that certainty.

  With him, she was certain she would find it.

  “This is a posture collar.” His voice was quiet and heavy with need. The quick slide of arousal touched between her thighs at the sound of it. The smooth leather immediately warmed against her skin as he slipped it around her throat and despite the fact she'd never worn anything like this, she felt comfortable right away. Most of all, just like the first time he'd slipped the cuffs on her wrists, the collar felt as if it were exactly what she wanted and needed.

  The gentle curve of the material cradled her jaw and didn't prevent movement of her head, but definitely prohibited a wide range of movement. She could comfortably swallow and open her mouth, but that was all. When she realized that had been his intention, her body flooded with heat and she inhaled sharply in response as a quiet laugh passed her lips.

  The expression on his face changed. His gentle smile vanished as he secured the lock on the back of the collar. “This isn't intended to be amusing.” The words were spoken carefully and through gritted teeth.

  “This isn't amusement.” Her voice matched his in tone and sounded foreign to her.

  Despite the charged air around them, she was safe. She couldn't explain why the circle of leather made her feel that way but decided not to question it. What she did know was that her wrists felt bare because he'd always cuffed her by this point. Missing their weight, she held her wrists out. “Something's missing.”

  “Aren't I the one who is supposed to be issuing demands?”

  It hadn't been a demand, but she realized her mistake. “I'm sorry.”

  His face softened as he slipped out of the moment. “Don't be. Don't ever, ever be sorry. This isn't just for me. We're in this together, understand?”

  She nodded in response and watched as he buckled the left cuff first, then the right, around her wrists. He blew out a shaky breath as soon as the last piece of leather was threaded through the buckle. Confused, she lifted her gaze to his and saw the raw emotion in the depths of his eyes.

  His finger grazed over the curve of her ear and he pressed a light kiss to her forehead. “You have no idea how gorgeous you are right now, do you?”

  No, she didn't, but she'd seen the change in his body—even felt it. That was a clear indicator as to what he saw. Arousal filled the room and the space around them so thick that it sank into her skin and nearly drowned her. Its scorching hot touch traveled along her spine, around her hips and pooled low in her abdomen so that her entire body tingled.

  He never failed to surprise her and this was no exception. The expected order didn't come. Instead, he took his time to carefully disrobe her. First her tee, then her pants. He paused and admired her as she stood before him in a thin pair of panties and a bra.

  With light contact, he reached out and traced the underside of her breasts with one finger. Even through the padded material, she felt his sizzling touch. Her breath caught as he traced a pattern.

  “That is completely perfect and absolutely you.”

  Startled, she saw that he'd traced the outline of the Superman logo laser-cut into the fabric at the top of the bra cup.

  Dear God, of all the times to get caught wearing this bra. Mortified, she shrugged off the strap as he lowered it and listened to his chuckle.

  At least he was amused by it.

  The scraps of fabric fell to the floor as he undressed her and she stood before him entirely naked. She could tell the instant he slipped back into the scene and her stomach flipped in anticipation as he locked the cuffs together behind her back.

  His hand closed over both her shoulders. “On your knees,” he ordered with determined force and she lowered herself in compliance. Her breath altered as it fell into a familiar pattern. She had already slipped into the hazy state she succumbed to when they were together.

  Patrick's fingers worked the button of his jeans and her anticipation jumped with each slide of metal through denim. Before she knew it, the pants pooled around his ankles and he pushed them away. Freed from the confines of the somewhat heavy material, she scented his arousal. Musk mixed with power. She'd smelled it before, as most lovers did when they engaged in some kind of sexual activity with their partner. However, in this position, it washed over her like a spring rain shower.

  Something about this time was different.

  He slid off the briefs he wore and stood before her completely nude. He was a glorious sight to behold and the image he made was not one she would soon forget. She would always cherish the picture as he stood over her this way.

  Taken by the moment, she leaned forward and slid her tongue over the already swollen head of his thick length. The taste of the salty fluid danced on her tongue as his breath hissed between his teeth, the quiet moan he gave filled with need. His body jerked in surprise and she realized she'd tasted him without thinking. The sound he'd made fueled her and she opened her mouth wider to surround the entire head of his cock. His hiss was drawn out, sharpened as he tunneled his fingers through her hair in encouragement. She relaxed her jaw as much as the collar would allow and under his hands, surrendered her control.

  “I have thought about this all day. About how I'd order you on your knees so I could feel what your mouth was like as you swallowed me.” He moved his hips slightly and she rolled her tongue along the underside of the hardness in her mouth. His fingers tightened against her head as a quiet gasp escaped from between his lips. Again, the sound of it coupled with his words, fueled her and she dragged her teeth against his flesh as he started to pull away.

  His legs trembled and she wondered if his control was merely an illusion. Though Allison—the submissive—was the one on her knees in front of Patrick—the dominant—she was the one who actually had all the power. She could put a stop to this at any moment and he would heed her wishes.

  One word, that's all it took.

  That thought empowered her and fueled the heady arousal that coursed through her. His muscles shifted as he started to remove himself from her mouth, but she wasn't finished. Not even close. She'd wondered what it would be like to be on her knees before him and now that she was, she wasn't about to give it up so easily. She'd had her first taste and now she wanted it all.

  She pushed forward and took more of him into her mouth. Her teeth grazed over the surface of his hard skin as she moved and he gave a strangled cry in response.

  “You are so fucking wonderful, do you know that? Your mouth is so fucking wonderful.” H
is voice faltered a bit. It was as if he could barely maintain control. He hadn't expected her to do what she had.

  His fingers tightened against her head and he rolled his hips, prepared to push himself more deeply into her mouth. She was grateful that he seemed to understand the mechanics involved with the current position. They found a rhythm that suited them both and as he shifted, he moved deeper. It allowed her to gradually relax her throat muscles to take each and every inch he offered to her.

  His movements quickened and she surrendered full control and completely relaxed her throat and jaw. He groaned in approval as her nose brushed against the coarse hair on his lower abdomen. She expected him to move again, but instead, he surprised her by holding her in place.

  “Swallow,” he said with a strained tone to his voice. She'd barely heard him over the buzz that filled her entire body. Her throat muscles worked over him as she did as instructed and he groaned in appreciation. The sound drove her to swallow again and she felt him grow harder and larger in her mouth.

  The need for air caused her to pull back a few inches and draw a few quick breaths in through her nose. She moved again, swallowed him entirely once more. Her tongue cradled the underside of his cock and used the muscles in it to caress him. The muscles of her mouth and throat flexed and moved around him as she milked him.

  A deep, guttural moan of unreserved satisfaction sounded over the roar in her ears and she felt his erection go rock hard seconds before the orgasm tore through him. As she greedily swallowed, she urged more from him and moved with shallow thrusts as he bathed her throat.

  She wasn't finished until she drank him dry.

  It was a long few moments before his orgasm abated and his entire body trembled as he fought for control in order to stand before her. Now his knees shook.

  Unwilling to sever the connection with him just yet, she curled her tongue over his softened length and lightly sucked. The taste of his spent flesh in her mouth made her close her eyes and savor him. He pulled away after a moment and knelt before her as his hands shook.