Even When It's Wrong

by Nicole Jackson

  “Tell me what?” I grimaced.

  She hesitated. “I’ll tell you later.”

  I shook my head. “Nah, tell me now. I’m all ears.”

  “Okay,” she gulped. “Umm…you know that I’ve been enjoying myself down here, right?”

  “Yeah,” I nodded, urging her to continue.

  “And you know that my home life aint the best.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “So, I was thinking that I should finish out my senior year here in Dallas. That way I won’t have to deal with Meeka, and her bullshit. You know how she thinks it’s a crime for me to smile, and be happy. I don’t have that problem here, and every time I think about going back to that I get to feeling down. I mean, I might as well stay out here. It’s not like anybody really gives a damn about me out there, and it’ll probably make everybody’s lives better. You know?”

  I swallowed hard. “My, I’m hearing everything that you’re saying. I really am. I noticed how you done spread your lil’ wings out there too. So, everything in me wants to tell you to stay out there, if you think that’s what’s best. In fact, if that’s what’s really in your heart, then stay out there. But I aint gonna pretend to be with it. Honestly, I’m missing you like crazy, and the only thing that’s been keeping me going is the fact that I thought this shit would soon be over. So nah, Ion want you to stay out there, but if you do…I’ll have to accept that.”

  “Omari, I miss you too. On God. But the thing is…out there I be feeling like I have nobody. Like everybody is against me, and I haven’t felt that while I’ve been here. But the way you make me feel trumps all this. Still, I gotta be honest. I don’t feel comfortable with putting my everything into you. You know our situation, and you are not promised to me, Omari.”

  My nostrils flared, as I listened to her talk foolishly. “Look, Mya, let’s get one thing straight. When you say that nobody out here cares, you got me wrong. I fucking care.” I pointed at my chest. “You can believe that shit, if you don’t believe nothing else. And Ion care how the shit looks, or how it gotta happen. No matter what happens to us relationship wise, I’ma be there. Ten toes down. And that’s my word.”

  Although, through the phone, she gazed directly at me. “Promise?”

  I placed a hand on my heart. “I fucking promise.”

  She bit her bottom lip. “Then that’s what it is. I’ll be home at the end of the summer.”

  “Nah.” I shook my head. “You coming to this muthafuckin’ video shoot, but yeah, I got you. At the end of the summer you bringing your ass back. Or I’ma come down there and bring your ass back myself. But that’s on you.”

  Chapter 17

  Mya

  “I seen your girl post a BM…W. So, I hit her in the DM. All eyes, yeah, I see ‘em. Yeah, that’s your man. I’d hate to be him…” Yo Gotti blared from the speakers, and we were too lit.

  “Aye! Snapchat me that pussy if it’s cool,” I rapped along with the song. “Aye!” I wagged my tongue, as I rolled my hips in the seat.

  “That nigga say he loves the Gram,” Cavalli grooved in her seat, but was a tad more conservative than me, since she was behind the wheel.

  “Yeah, facetime me that dick, nigga,” Valisha rapped her own lyrics to the song from the backseat.

  I was in high spirts, as we entered the city limits. It was the end of the summer, and as promised I was back in Houston. My auntie Micko was so cool that she’d allowed us, along with Lonny to drive to Houston from Dallas on our own. And we’d been running our mouths the entire four-hour drive. It had been about two weeks since I’d seen Omari face to face, and I was more than ready to be all up in his arms. He’d been managing to travel down to Dallas every other weekend, but that wasn’t enough. So, I was actually glad to be back home, for now, anyway.

  I’d had one hell of a summer, and now felt more like sisters with Cavalli and Valisha versus the first cousins we were. I knew that Cavalli was a real one, after she’d realized that I was dealing with Meeka’s boyfriend. Unbeknownst to me, she was Facebook friends with Meeka, and she’d been regularly posting photos of Omari. Mostly it was off guard pictures that he was unaware that she’d taken, but it was enough for Cavalli to positively identify him when she laid eyes on him.

  I could still remember our conversation vividly from that night. “Your mama’s boyfriend, Mya? Really? You hell, bitch.”

  I shook my head. “Valli, it aint like that.”

  She arched her brows. “It aint like what? Did you not just disappear for two days with a nigga that your mama is claiming?”

  I gulped. “I did, but…it’s complicated.”

  “You know what, I think I know how this shit happened. Auntie was out there dogging you, doing you bad. And then ole boy comes into the picture, and looks out for you. I mean, that would explain the drastic makeover. And shit happened. You crossed over some dangerous lines, and now here yall are. Am I right?”

  I nodded, as my gaze fell to the ground. “For the most part.”

  “Damn,” she sighed. “This shit is crazy, Mya. But where do yall go from here? I mean, you seem to be attached to the nigga, but that’s ya mama’s nigga. No matter how you try to slice it. And even if I get why you aint really caring about how this affects Auntie Meeka, the fact still remains that she’s your mama. Shit, I even noticed how she’s been carrying you since you’ve been out here. She never calls to check on you like a regular mama should. Hell, it seems like she aint even concerned about you, but every post she makes on the Book is about her nigga, which clearly is her only concern. But damn, bitch,” she stressed.

  “I know this aint right, cousin. I would be dead wrong to even attempt to justify it. But I’m caught up. That’s the only way I know how to put it.”

  She nodded. “I hear you. And after kicking it with you, I know that you aint no loose hoe that I gotta watch. So, if you say that you got caught up, I gotta believe you. But I aint gon bullshit you. The shit is messy. And you keep going how you going, the shit is gonna hit the fan. Still, you have my word. I aint saying shit.”

  And since that day Cavalli had kept her word. She only discussed my situation with me and Omari privately, but she never held back. Anything she felt about the situation was always out in the open, no matter if it was negative or positive, and I respected her for that. So, I was excited that she’d be attending TSU, and living on campus. Therefore, I’d have a real hanging buddy around. One that I could actually trust.

  “Damn, it’s a pretty day,” Valisha acknowledged, snapping me out of my thoughts.

  “I know,” Lonny co-signed. “Let’s do something, before we go back home.”

  “Like what?” Valisha questioned.

  “MLK,” Cavalli spoke up.

  “Huh?” I glanced her way.

  She cut her eyes at me. “Really, Mya? This is your city, and you don’t fuck around on the boulevard?”

  I rolled my eyes at her. “Hoe, you know that I couldn’t spread my wings here.”

  She smirked. “Yeah, I forgot. But anyway, it’s Sunday, so let’s ride down MLK and see what’s popping.”

  I stroked my freshly done faux locks. “I guess.”

  Cavalli rolled her eyes. “You don’t sound too excited, hoe. But don’t worry, you’ll see that nigga, eventually. Just wait,” she called me out, recognizing exactly what time it was. I was so ready to see zaddy, and she was holding me up.

  Omari had no idea that we’d driven down, and was under the impression that I’d be back on Tuesday. So, the plan was to surprise him, and catch his ass off guard…just in case he was engaging in some shit that I was unaware of. Therefore, I was anxious to get to my apartments, but being a good sport, I decided to see what the block party was hitting for.

  By the time, we pulled up on MLK everybody was in full bopper mode, as we saw all the slabs, swanging down the road. “Bitch, yesssss!” Lonny’s loud skinny ass boasted. “It’s niggas everywhere.”

  “Bitchhhhhh,” Valisha stressed. “We gotta pa
rk, and walk around. I think I see some long-distance slash every other weekend lil’ boos out here.”

  “Oh God,” I yawned, really not interested in parking. That would just prolong me getting home.

  Cavalli waved me off, as she swooped into a gas station. “That nigga will be there. We ‘bout to see what’s up.”

  “Whatever,” I huffed, as I pushed my door open. I was rocking some light blue denim booty cut off shorts, along with a distressed cropped tee that exposed my red sports bra underneath, which matched perfectly with my red and white retro Jordans.

  I was about to walk off, when Cavalli’s slick ass played my song. She knew anytime I heard it, I had to do my little dance, and today would be no exception. So, I propped my foot on the inside of the truck, and went to work.

  “Just keeping it honest. You wouldn’t want this young nigga if I wasn’t gripping this foreign. That’s why I came back, top down.” Torey Lanez pumped from the speakers.

  I rocked my hips to the beat, as my favorite part played. “You-oo know. You-oo know. This foreign car let you know…” I grooved to the beat, as I threw my ass in a circle.

  “Got damn!” some nigga shouted, startling me. I quickly stopped dancing, feeling embarrassed. “Nah, don’t stop now,” he insisted, stepping over to me.

  I felt like I was back in school, and was being approached by the principal, as this fine, tall, chocolate nigga hovered over me. I narrowed my eyes, trying to recall where I’d seen him before.

  “I know you from somewhere,” he revealed, taking the words right out of my mouth.

  “Me too.” I nodded.

  He snapped his fingers. “IHOP. That’s where I seen you. You was with that hating ass nigga Gwuap.”

  I chuckled, before a nervous energy shot through me. If he knew Omari, did he know about him and Meeka?

  “What is he? Your little boyfriend?” he questioned, giving me the impression that I was once again overthinking.

  I shrugged, as Cavalli, and the rest of the girls stepped over, joining us. “Something like that.”

  “I’m saying,” he rubbed his hands together, causing the light to bounce off his glistening watch. “Can I get that number?” Admittedly, the nigga was fresh from head to toe, wearing Louie everything, and he smelled like a trillion fucking bucks. His hair was waved up, and he had the prettiest tight eyes I’d ever seen on a dude. His only problem was that…he wasn’t Omari.

  “Umm,” I tucked my bottom lip into my mouth, hesitating.

  “Bitch,” Cavalli bucked her eyes, as she lightly elbowed me.

  “What?” I asked through clenched teeth.

  “That nigga aint promised to you.”

  “Whatever.” I rolled my eyes.

  She turned her head, focusing on the nameless nigga standing in front of us. “Uh, what’s your name?”

  He smiled. “Flame.”

  “Her name is Mya,” Cavalli volunteered.

  “Mya, huh? That’s what’s up, but you can’t talk for yourself, Mya?” he questioned.

  “Yeah, I can. I don’t know why she felt the need to do it for me.” I cut my eyes at Cavalli.

  “So, what’s up? I’m just trying to be your friend. You feel me? Be the nigga you call when you wanna smile, and do shit like go to the mall or a nice concert. Is you with that?”

  “Hell, yeah,” Valisha blurted, speaking for me.

  He chuckled. “Yall funny.”

  “I mean, that sounds good, and all, but I already have somebody.”

  “Mya!” Cavalli gasped.

  Flame animatedly held his heart. “Damn, you aint have to do ya boy like that. I can’t be your friend? Just in case that nigga fuck up?”

  “Nah, Ion think that would be a good idea.”

  “Damn, baby girl, you killing me. Just take my number. You can call me, and that way the ball will be in your court.”

  “I don’t know,” I barely got out, before Cavalli snatched my cell clean out of my hand.

  Unlocking my phone, she handed it to him. “There. Put your number in there,” she instructed.

  With no shame, and without my permission, he locked his name and number in. “Alright, Ms. Pretty, Thick, Fine, Mya,” he rambled looking over my body, before handing me my phone. “Remember the ball is in your court.”

  “O…okay.” I nodded, before he casually strolled off.

  “Bitch, you crazy. Did you see that Escalade he just hopped in?” Valisha inquired.

  “Yeah. So, what?” I shrugged.

  “Ugh!” Cavalli huffed. “This girl is impossible.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” I switched away from the truck. “Are we gonna check out the scenery or what? I aint trying to be out here all day.”

  They all talked their shit, as they caught up with me. Together we twisted down the sidewalk, as we all continuously got approached by different dudes. Low key, I was enjoying myself, although I refused to give anybody some play. I was doing a great job of pretending that I was used to the cars, and niggas, until we came across this mirror painted Lambo. I mean, the car was like something I’d only seen on TV.

  “Biiitchhhhh,” Cavalli stressed. “Look at that car, and the nigga leaning against it.”

  “Good lawd!” Valisha blurted. “The Lord is my shepherd. He know what I want.” She stalked towards the car, but Cavalli snatched her back.

  “Girl, stop playing. You gon make us look fucking thirsty,” Cavalli snapped, which I thought was comical, figuring she’d quickly forgotten about the incident with Flame.

  I giggled at them, until I realized who the dude leaning on the Lambo was. He was Keyasia’s boyfriend, Wale. After taking a better look, I realized that he was standing near Jahrein Junior, Kells, a bunch of niggas I didn’t recognize, along with Omari.

  “Aw shit,” I grumbled, not knowing how Omari would feel seeing me there, especially when he thought that I was still in Dallas. Then I briefly considered standing from a distance to watch him do him, when he thought that no one was looking.

  He was standing there looking like a snack, wearing a MCM backpack and belt with Givenchy jeans and tee. He was gazing down at his phone, seemingly texting. Jealousy shot through my veins, as I thought about who he could be contacting, until my cell vibrated in my hand.

  Him: Damn I can’t wait for you to come home

  I smirked, looking up at him. With all the girls walking around, he was still thinking of me. My heart fluttered, thinking that he might actually love me for real. As if he could feel my presence, he lifted his head, locking eyes with me.

  Slowly, his eyes lowered into slits. “Say, Mya, bring your ass here.”

  Omari

  I shook my head, as Mya sashayed over to me. For a second, it was as if I couldn’t hear or see anything around me. It had only been two weeks since I’d last seen her, but I don’t think I’d realized how much she’d transformed, until that very moment. She’d gone from being a looker to something out of this world…and she knew it. Quite frankly, the shit was intoxicating, as I felt this uncontrollable urge to be near her…in her. And the shit couldn’t wait.

  “What’s up?” she smirked, as she stood before me.

  “The fuck you doing out here, without saying shit? The hell you got up your sleeve?”

  She tucked her lips into her mouth. “I wanted to surprise you. You know, see what you been up to.”

  I lowered my eyes. “I aint been up to nothing.” I studied her closely, wanting to further check her, but there were stronger urges pushing me in a different direction. “Meeka know you back yet?”

  “No,” she shook her head. “Not that I know of.”

  “Cool, cool, cool,” I glanced around, noticing her cousins standing a few feet away. “So, where’s your clothes?” I focused on her face again.

  “Back in their mama’s truck. She let them use it to bring me home.”

  “Alright, bet. I’m finna pull the car around to wherever yall parked. We gon put all your stuff in my trunk, before we burn.”


  “Nigga, did I just hear you say something about leaving?” Kells interjected. “You just got here.”

  I glimpsed his way. “Yeah, I gotta go. I’ll fuck with you later.”

  “This nigga here,” he grumbled.

  “Yeah, yeah,” I waved him off, looking over at Mya’s cousins. “Say, yall need a ride back to yall car, cause she need her stuff?”

  “Really, Mya?” her cousin Cavalli groaned.

  I chuckled, knowing that she didn’t like the fact that I was breaking up their thotting session. She probably wanted Mya as bait to pull in the niggas, but they all had me fucked up. “Yeah, lil’ mama. It’ll be alright. Yall can keep bopping, after she gets her stuff. The quicker you take me to your the car, the quicker yall can get back to strolling down the boulevard.”

  ******

  “Girl, would you come on?” I griped from the bed.

  “Okay, okay, hold up,” Mya insisted.

  We’d checked into The Four Seasons, and the plan was to live it up, but not before I got my rocks off at least once. But she was playing. Had a nigga stripped down to nothing but boxers, while she pranced around in sheer black booty shorts with the matching bra. She’d begged me to just lay on the bed, and wait on her. But I was growing impatient.

  “There we go,” she smiled, as the stereo pumped music.

  “Sex with me is so amazing…”

  I watched, as she spun around, before strutting over to me. Like a sexy kitten, she climbed onto the bed. She gave me a quick smile, before she stood up, hovering above me. Giving me her back, she began to move to the music.

  “Oh-na-na-nana. Five fingers on it. Hit it like you want it. I mean hit it like I’m on it…”

  She bent over, grabbing her knees, making her ass go round. I sat up a little to get a better look. She briefly glanced back at me, before bending it over. Her ass cheeks jumped, as she looked at me between her legs. Needless to say, I was rock hard. So, I was ready to stop her in her tracks when she dropped it low, bouncing one cheek at a time. But before I could make a move, she backed it up on me.