The Heart's Command

by Rachel Lee

  More than anything, Niall wanted this rescue. When they got home, back to the station, he wanted time alone with Brie. Time to talk without the threat of dying. Time to try and mend the past and talk about a future that would include both of them.

  As he knelt in the rubber dingy, one arm around Brie's shoulders, the other waving the flashlight to help the cutter hone in on their location, Niall felt trepidation, joy, anxiety and panic.

  Was there a chance for them now? Or had the admissions they'd both made come under the duress of dying? Would Brie feel the same way tomorrow? Niall wasn't certain, but one thing he knew for sure now: he wasn't going to abandon her again. He wasn't going to run away this time. He was going to face Brie honestly, warts and all. She deserved that from him. No, he wasn't his father's son; he was going to prove that to Brie. This was one battle he wasn't running from. Niall was being given a second chance to prove he was a far better man than his father had ever struggled to be.

  ♥ Scanned by Coral ♥

  Chapter 6

  "Are you ready to go home?" Niall asked as he came and stood next to Brie, once the doctor had finished examining her. She sat on a gurney, dressed in tan slacks and a colorful short-sleeved blouse. Like him, she'd dressed in civilian clothes she kept in her station locker. As she lifted her head, her blue eyes shimmering with quiet joy, he managed a slight, sheepish grin. His heart bounded with unparalleled happiness.

  "Your home or mine?"

  Niall waited as the doctor finished filling out her report form and left. The door closed quietly behind her. They were alone. Finally. Reaching up, he grazed Brie's pink cheek with his fingers. "Mine." Where you belong. With me. Like it should have been all along. Her lips parted softly at his feathery touch. The look he thought he'd never see again, was in her eyes. It was a look of love—for him.

  Sliding off the gurney, Brie retrieved her black uniform purse and hung it over her left shoulder. Her heart was beating hard with excitement and anticipation. "I'm ready. Let's go home...."

  The words sounded wonderful. As if in a dream, Niall nodded and opened the door for her. They were at the Coast Guard station medical dispensary. After spending two days at sea aboard the Coast Guard cutter that had rescued them, they'd finally made it to shore.

  The welcome at the station had been nothing short of overwhelming. Morgan Trayhern had embraced them, tears in his eyes, he was so glad that they were safe. Best of all, his mercenary, Burke Ormand, had contacted him, and his cover was still intact and he was fine. After receiving a lot of handshakes, claps to the back, hugs and tears of relief that they were safe, Brie and Niall had been hustled off to the dispensary for the obligatory medical checkup that any pilots went through after a crash. When they were aboard the cutter, they'd filled out individual reports on the crash, and now administration was looking at their paperwork.

  Moving out into the passageway of the highly polished white tile, Brie looked over at Niall as he walked at her side. As officers of equal rank, they could have a personal relationship. However, they were on a military base and no hand-holding or any show of affection was allowed. Brie itched to reach out and slide her hand into Niall's, but she stopped herself.

  Outside, the weather was clearing. Miraculously the hurricane had suddenly veered away from Kauai, so the rough ride on the ship had become smoother as they approached the island. Niall was grateful, because he'd been seasick from the moment they'd been picked up out of that cold, black sea. The two days aboard the cutter they'd spent sleeping, eating and getting themselves together emotionally once more. There hadn't been a lot of time to speak intimately with one another. Both had been put into the hospital dispensary, where they had remained for the voyage home. With medical technicians always hovering around, or the doctor, Niall found it impossible to speak privately with Brie. He had so much to say, so much he wanted to tell her. Now, they would have a chance.

  Brie entered the small bungalow Niall had. It was a cozy place filled with bamboo furniture, a red-yel-low-and-olive-green Oriental rug on the floor, and photos of bright hibiscus flowers hanging on the beige walls. Her heart jumped with shock when she spotted a small bamboo table near one wall that held a number of photos in silver and gold frames. As Niall closed the door to his home, she went over and looked at them.

  To her surprise she saw that many were photos of their wedding ceremony. Her heart squeezed as she saw a color photo of herself standing in profile, her belly growing big with their baby. She was smiling toward Niall, who had taken that proud photo. Poignantly, Brie remembered that day. She'd been standing outside their home, the wind playing with her hair, which fell to her shoulders. Her eyes were burning with joy, her hands caressed her swelling belly, and a look of love filled her face—love for Niall.

  Niall moved quietly to her side and slipped his hand gently across her shoulders as she stared down at the photos. "Good memories," he told her in a husky tone.

  His touch was warming. Brie twisted to look up at him. His face was no longer tense with strain. She still saw remnants of the trauma in his features, the darkness beneath his eyes. They'd nearly died. But in a near-death experience, they'd found one another again, too. Her voice was low. "Yes...good memories. The best, Niall."

  His fingers closed across her shoulder and he turned her to face him. Erie's hand went around his waist and she rested her head against his shoulder. "We can have them again, Brie," he murmured. "I know we can. We just have to work at it differently this time." Niall's heart squeezed with terror. Would she want to try and get back together again with him? He wasn't sure. Just because she'd said she loved him out there on that storm-tossed ocean didn't mean she wanted to marry him, or live with him, again. He gazed down at her soft profile. When she looked up at him, he saw tears swimming in her turquoise eyes. Her lashes were thick and framed her shimmering eyes. Brie was incredibly beautiful to him, from the freckles that ranged across her nose and cheeks, to her straight red hair, which made her eyes her most prominent feature. She looked like a beauty from an old Renaissance painting to him.

  "I meant what I said out there in that raft, Niall."

  "That you never stopped loving me?"

  Swallowing, Brie nodded. "I tried to stop loving you after I asked for a divorce." Shaking her head, she reached out and touched the last photograph. "But I couldn't. You weren't a bad person. Just...mixed up and confused. I knew the score, and I knew why you were the way you were. I knew it going into our marriage, but I believed that with time, you'd change and grow, and we'd open up those channels between us."

  Nodding sadly, Niall whispered, "I was pretty stupid, darling."

  "No, just scared and unsure. You had to learn to trust me with yourself, Niall." Brie searched his saddened face. "And you have. Out there in that ocean, after the crash. That's where we learned to trust one another for the first time in our lives."

  "Yes," he whispered. "I trust you now as never before. And I'm not going to be afraid to tell you what's on my mind or what's in my heart."

  She smiled gently and eased her arms around his broad, capable shoulders. Their hips met and melted against one another. "Here's what's in my heart, sweetheart," she whispered.

  Niall cocked his head. Her eyes glimmered with mischief and joy. "Tell me...and it's yours...." he murmured.

  "I want you. I want to lie in your arms. Make love with you. Reacquaint myself with you in all ways." Brie slid her hand across his recently shaved face. "What's in your heart?"

  Smiling unevenly, Niall whispered, "You. I want you so badly I can taste you. I want to love you until you faint with pleasure, Brie. I want to make you happy. I want to see that smile I used to see after we'd made love. I want to kiss your luscious, sweet mouth...."

  "Can we bring the past to life again?"

  "Yes," he answered, his voice deepening, "we can...."

  The queen-size bed with the bamboo head- and footboard was covered with a cream-colored duvet decorated with emerald green bamboo stalks. The windo
w was made of stained glass, the weak rays of sunlight filtering through it casting a rainbow of colors across the bed. There was a bamboo dresser and a bedstand with a pale green lamp on it. The floor was a gleaming teakwood, Brie noted, as she eased off her shoes.

  Standing near Niall, she began to slowly undress him, one item of clothing at a time. He was wearing that mysterious smile that had haunted her dreams. The look in his eyes as he slowly unbuttoned her blouse, one button at a time, sent heat flowing from her heart to her lower body. Brie melted beneath his hooded gray gaze as he eased the blouse from her shoulders. She never wore a bra because of her small breasts, only a white silk camisole, which he divested her of.

  Sliding his finger provocatively across her waist to the band of her slacks, Niall gently eased it open. The garment fell to the floor around her bare feet.

  "You are so beautiful," he whispered, as his hands moved to her silken briefs.

  Closing her eyes, Brie felt him run his large, water-roughened hands across her hips to divest her of the last of her lingerie. Unable to think coherently, she managed to loosen his jeans with her trembling fingers. Heart pounding, she closed her eyes, her hands gripping his waist. Niall's fingers moved tantalizingly up across her flared rib cage, then upward to cup and hold her breasts in his hands. Prickles of heat and longing exploded through her. Feeling dizzy, Brie rocked forward, wanting more of his touch. Wanting him.

  "It's time," he whispered in a husky tone against her ear. Removing his jeans and briefs, he drew her to the bed and guided her down upon the soft, feathery duvet. As Niall eased next to her, naked, their hips and legs brushing together, he smiled. Brie's eyes were half-closed. He saw the sunlight in their depths, the longing, the need of him as she lay there facing him. Sliding his arm beneath her neck he brought her fully against him. When her breasts brushed tantaliz-ingly against his chest, he groaned. The sensation was so fiercely hot that he felt himself harden instantly. As her trembling fingers slid from his arm to his neck and then on to trace the line of his cheek, he leaned down and captured her tempting, smiling mouth.

  A moan of pleasure rippled through Brie as his mouth took hers, with a commanding strength that sent a message straight to her heart: she was his. All his. And he was claiming her; like a man claimed his woman. His breath was ragged and moist against her cheek as he continued his silken assault upon her lips. Hungrily, Brie responded in kind, unable to get enough of Niall, of his taste, his wonderful male fragrance or the rough texture of his skin as he rubbed seductively against her.

  When he gripped her hip, pulling her hard against him, letting her know he was more than ready to take her, claim her, she cried out softly.

  "Enter me," she whispered raggedly against his mouth. "Take me! I need you so badly, Niall...now... please! Now..." And she thrust her hips against him.

  As she looked up into his glittering, silvery eyes— eyes narrowed like those of a predator—she moaned. This was the man she loved. The man she'd waited so long for, and thought she'd lost forever. Now he was hot, sleek and powerful as he moved above her to claim her. Never had Brie thought they'd be in one another's arms again. The moment had sweetness, hope and such a palpable beauty that her heart mushroomed with joy. Her breath hitched in anticipation as his knee moved her thighs even farther apart.

  Just as the sunlight broke through the ragged clouds to strike the rainbow colors of the stained glass, Niall entered her aching, tense body. He flowed into her like all the colors of the rainbow. Like sunlight to her heart, she welcomed him, all of him, into herself. Arms closing around his shoulders, tight shoulders, she arched against him with a husky cry of pleasure.

  Every movement, every thrust and equally joyful response flowed through Brie until she was breathless, riding on a wave of such pleasure that her world spun out of control. Absorbing his male odor, she reveled in the way their bodies fused and glided together. He fit her so perfectly, melded with her in such a glorious golden cloud of happiness, that all Brie could do was surrender to her wildly beating heart.

  Niall was her life. She was a part of him, and he a part of her. Two halves that made a whole. He made her feel complete, and strong, and beautiful. His breathing was ragged against her ear, his breath hot, his growl deep as he claimed her and made her his. The violent explosion of heat, light and love that occurred deep within her being tore the breath from her. She arched and climaxed, spinning off into a kaleidoscope of rainbow colors.

  And when Niall stiffened, his hands gripping her shoulders, fingers digging in, she knew he was gifting her with his life, his love, in that wildly spinning moment torn out of time.

  For the next few minutes, all Brie could do was feel the aftershocks riffling through her body, one after another. The pleasure was so intense, she truly did feel faint. All sounds ceased except Niall's breathing near her cheek, his wet kisses against her brow, nose and, finally, her smiling mouth. His hands ranged knowingly along her length, as if reacquainting himself with her in every possible, intimate way. She loved his exploration of her afterward, the gentle touch of his trembling fingers caressing her taut breasts, the way he suckled her and made her moan with want of him all over again.

  Time had no meaning to Brie as she languished in Niall's arms, a prisoner of pleasure. How wonderful it was to kiss him in return, to see the joy in his stormy gray eyes, that feral look as he rose above her, that crooked smile of triumph in his handsome face. His dark hair was plastered against his brow, perspiration gleaming on his taut body in the aftermath. Brie watched, mesmerized, as light streamed through the stained glass window, sending color flowing across them.

  "The colors of life," she told him, her voice husky, "are flowing across us again."

  Niall lay against Brie, propped up on the one elbow, his arm beneath her head. "Yes..." he agreed, watching the gold, crimson and emerald colors move in graceful asymmetry across her hips, torso and breasts. How much he loved her. Looking down at her, he ached to love her again, to show her once more, how much she meant to him. Running his fingers across her damp red hair, he whispered, "You're my life, darlin'. I was a ghost walking the land without you. Now—" he lifted his head and looked at the brilliant, sunlit window "—you've given me back my life. Now I'm not walking in a land of black, white or gray. You complete me. You give my life color, meaning, a reason for being. A reason to wake up in the morning full of hope, of happiness..."

  Tears drifted down the sides of Brie's face as she reached up and gently stroked his cheek. "You're no less to me, Niall." She saw his eyes flare with surprise. "It's so wonderful to hear how you feel... I love it. I love hearing how you feel about me...about us."

  Capturing her hand against his cheek, he rasped, "I'm sorry I never shared this part of me with you, Brie. I will now...if you'll give us a second chance?"

  How could she say no? Brie smiled and nodded. "Yes, I want that second chance with you, Niall. I'm willing if you are...."

  A sigh of relief flowed through him. Placing her hand against his heart, he said brokenly, "When you gave me back the wedding band and engagement ring, I kept them. I never threw them away or sold them. I've kept them in the same red velvet case they were in when I gave them to you the day I asked you to marry me."

  Touched, Brie felt hot tears falling across her cheeks, blurring Niall's features. "Oh, Niall...I didn't know...."

  Shrugging sheepishly, he wrapped his fingers around her hand. "When you left, I set up that table with those photos. In the drawer are the wedding bands."

  "You never quit hoping, did you?" she choked out.

  "I guess not. I didn't want our marriage to be over, Brie, but I didn't know what else to do, or how to get you back."

  "Because you were in as much pain over the loss as I was." Brie shook her head and slowly sat up. "I was just as blinded and grieving as you were, Niall. I didn't realize all this about you."

  "Listen," he whispered, pulling her back into his arms as he lay against the headboard, "we lost our baby. How else coul
d you feel? You were wild with grief. With shock. I understood that later. But not at the time. I was too wrapped up in my past, the abandonment... and I ran just like my father did." Mouth turning down, Niall held her in his arms and pressed a kiss against her furrowed brow, "I promise you, Brie, that will never happen again. I've learned my lesson. I want this second chance with you. And it doesn't matter if you ever get pregnant again. I'll accept whatever the future has in store for us. As long as we're together...."

  Sighing, Brie snuggled deeper into his warm, strong arms, her cheek resting against his darkly haired chest. She could hear his heart pounding. "I want babies, Niall. Even now, I hope that our making love has created one. If it has, I'll be overjoyed. And I'll be scared, too. I'll be afraid of losing this second one as I lost the first."

  Hearing the carefully concealed anxiety in her voice, Niall placed his finger beneath Brie's chin and forced her to look up at him. "Listen to me, darlin'. We'll take this one day at a time. If you get pregnant, we won't jump the gun like we did last time. We'll be talking to one another this time, and that will help a helluva lot. In my heart, I don't feel you'll lose the next baby. Things happen for a reason. But we have grown and matured in the last two years, so that this time around it'll be different. Better." And he gave her a devastatingly charming smile.

  Niall's dazzling male smile could always coax Brie out of her deepest worry or despondency. That was his priceless Irish legacy—that smile that made rainy days in her life dissolve in the sunlight.

  Pressing a kiss to his shoulder, she lifted her head and smiled up at him. "I'm game if you are."

  Nodding, Niall sighed. "That's a roger, my beautiful lady."

  "I don't want to live with you, Niall."