Cut Too Deep

by Marissa Farrar

  “No? There’s nothing you might want to say to Jenna?”

  His eyes cast down and he scuffed a foot against the floorboards. “I already told you, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Are you sure you haven’t done anything that might upset Jenna in some way?”

  Mikey lifted his face and glared at Ryker. “No, I haven’t! What’s she doing here all the time, anyway? Have you moved her in or something without even talking to me? You’re not my father, and she’s not my mother!”

  “No one is trying to be your parent, Mikey. We just want some answers.”

  “We!” he exclaimed. “See, you’re all ‘we’ this, ‘we’ that. She’s just some fat chick you’ve screwed, and all of a sudden I’m supposed to care what she thinks!”

  “Hey! Watch your mouth.”

  Jenna put a hand on his arm. “It’s okay, Ryker. Mikey is right.”

  “No, Jenna, it’s not all right. You mean a lot to me, and I won’t have you being disrespected in the house I work to pay for.”

  Mikey scoffed. “Well, that’s bullshit. Dad paid for this house, not you.”

  “Yeah, and who pays the bills now and puts food on the table and clothes on your back?”

  “I can move out, you know. Social services will find me somewhere else to live until I’m eighteen.”

  Ryker’s eyebrows lifted. “I’d love to see how total strangers react when you disrespect them like you do me.”

  Jenna got to her feet. “Look, I’ll go. I don’t want to come between two brothers.”

  “No you won’t,” he said, pulling her back down to sit beside him. Ryker took a breath and put both hands out toward Mikey. “Let’s just calm down. Something happened that I need to ask you about. I’m not accusing you, I just need to know.”

  Mikey narrowed his eyes. “Fine. What is it?”

  “Did you or anyone else mess with Jenna’s sheets?”

  He shook his head in genuine confusion. “Her sheets? No. Why, what happened?”

  “Someone killed a dozen sparrows and crushed their remains all over her sheets. It was brutal.”

  “Jesus. You think I’d pull that kind of shit?”

  “I’m running out of other things to think.”

  “I didn’t touch her sheets, man. I swear it. I left here just after you guys did, and I just got back.”

  Ryker let out a deep exhale. “Okay, thanks, Mikey. Sorry I blamed you.”

  The boy gave an awkward shrug. “Yeah, whatever. I’m going to my room.”

  They waited until his bedroom door slammed shut and then turned to each other. Jenna’s stomach was in knots. She hated that she’d been the centre of their argument.

  “I don’t think it was Mikey,” said Ryker, “but he was acting guilty about something.”

  “Maybe. I can’t say I blame him for being pissed.”

  “Mikey’s always pissed about something.”

  She shook her head. “I hate that I’m coming between you and your brother.”

  “No, you’re not. Whoever pulled that stunt with the birds is coming between me and Mikey.”

  “What if it’s Garrett?”

  “Then we’ll be ready for him.”

  “How?”

  Ryker pushed up the sleeves of his long sleeved, black t-shirt, exposing the patterns of tattoos scrawled up his arms and the leather cuff around one wrist. “I’ll be ready for him.”

  “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “I can handle myself, Jenna. I thought after the tomato festival you’d realized that.”

  She sighed, misery settling deep in her soul. Ryker might be tough, but Garrett was mean and cruel.

  He took her hand. “But listen, this was most likely someone with a vendetta against me, not you. Please, try not to worry.”

  She allowed him to pull her into an embrace and placed her cheek against his chest, inhaling the scent of him. Her hands clutched the back of his shirt, bunching the material tight in her fists. She wanted to believe Ryker about Garrett, but her gut instinct told her Garrett was responsible.

  Chapter Sixteen

  The rest of the day went without incident.

  Ryker cooked dinner for the three of them—spicy chicken wings with baked potatoes and homemade slaw—though Mikey took his food up into his bedroom without bothering to say much. Jenna tried her best to eat the wings, but she kept bringing to mind the sight of the crushed little bodies on the ground beneath her sheets, and lifting a wing of a different variety to her mouth was more than her stomach could handle.

  “No good?” Ryker asked her, as he cleared her plate and noticed the pile of leftover chicken.

  She shook her head. “Sorry. It’s not your cooking, I promise. I just can’t get my mind off what happened today.”

  Realization dawned in his eyes and his mouth twisted. “Damn. I didn’t make the best choice for dinner, huh?”

  “It’s not your fault. I didn’t think of it either until I saw them. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to eat wings again, which is a shame, because I love hot wings.”

  “I can make you something different?” he offered.

  “Nah, I’m good, thanks. The baked potato and coleslaw was enough.”

  To any outsider, their evening appeared to be the epitome of domestic bliss, but for Jenna, the probability of her car being ready the next day hung over her, causing conflicting emotions. Though she wanted to get away from Arlington, and leave the possibility of Garrett having found her far behind, the thought of leaving Ryker broke her heart.

  She didn’t want to leave his side for a moment. She found they always had an excuse to touch each other in some way—holding hands, or arms wrapped around each other’s waists, kisses stolen whenever they thought Mikey wouldn’t be looking. With every minute that passed, Jenna felt her attachment to Ryker grow. Just the thought of leaving him the next day made her eyes swim with tears.

  Ryker noticed. “Hey,” he said gently, touching her chin with the backs of his fingers, lifting her face to his. “What’s wrong?”

  She shook her head. “You know I can’t stay forever, don’t you? What we’re doing here—us—was never meant to be a permanent thing.”

  “Why can’t you stay?”

  “You know why! Garrett will definitely catch up to me then, if he hasn’t already.”

  He pulled her to her feet. “And when he does, we’ll deal with him. We’ll have the police arrest his scrawny ass and he’ll be safely back in jail where he belongs.”

  “And if he hurts one of us before the police arrive? Is it really worth it?”

  He lowered his forehead to hers, his arms around her waist, and stared into her eyes. “If it means I get to keep you, then yes, taking that risk is worth it.”

  “But I can’t stay. I mean, think about the practicalities. Where would I live?”

  “Here, with me and Mikey.”

  She blinked in surprise. “Oh, wow. That’s a massive step, Ryker. We barely know each other.”

  “We know enough.” He reached up to brush her hair from her neck. “I know it’s quick, but I think I’m falling in love with you, Jenna Armstrong. The idea of spending even an hour without you just about kills me. I can’t even start to comprehend how it would be to not even know when I’m going to see you again. I’d feel like I was being tortured every single second that passed. I need you, Jenna. I don’t know why, but I do. You’re as essential to my life as food, or air, or water. Don’t make me try to live without you.”

  Her heart caught in her chest, her eyes filling with tears but for a different reason this time. “You love me?”

  He nodded. “More than anything I’ve ever cared about in my life.”

  She nodded and bit her lip, trying to hold back a sob. “I love you, too,” she managed.

  He touched her mouth with his, a gentle, sweet kiss. “Then you can’t leave.”

  But she shook her head. “I don’t know what to do, Ryker. The idea of leaving terrifi
es me, and the idea of staying frightens me even more.”

  “We found each other. We’re meant to be together, I know it with every fiber of my body. If you left, you’d only have two men trying to track you down instead of one.”

  “You couldn’t do that. You have Mikey to think about.”

  Ryker sighed, and she knew she was right. “So don’t put me in that situation.”

  She’d never been so torn. She didn’t want to leave Ryker, but by staying she would be putting him in danger. She’d hurt him if she left, and he might get hurt if she stayed. But a broken heart would heal. He would meet someone new, though the thought hurt so bad it was like a physical pain. If Garrett killed Ryker, there was no coming back from that.

  But she didn’t want to argue with him, not now. He’d told her he loved her, and she would try to soak up every minute she had left to spend with him. She’d imprint every second onto her heart, every touch, and word, and kiss, so she could call upon the memories when she was at her most lonely.

  Jenna wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed him tight, burying her nose against his throat. “I’ll stay for now,” she whispered against his skin. “But I can’t promise forever.”

  He nodded, his lips pressed against the top of her head. “I guess that will have to do me for now.”

  She didn’t want to broach the topic again, but she needed to know. She let him go and stepped away from him. “My car will be ready by tomorrow, though, won’t it? It’s been a few days now.”

  Ryker glanced away, and turned to busy himself with the dishes. “Oh sure. I’ll get Sam to work on it tomorrow, first thing.”

  “Okay, thanks.” She frowned. “What about you? Don’t you need to go in and do some work?”

  “Yeah, I do, but making sure you’re safe is at the top of my list of things to do. The garage can wait another day or two.”

  If her car was ready, he wouldn’t need to stay away from work to take care of her.

  Mikey appeared in the doorway, drawing their attention. “I’m going to bed,” he announced.

  Ryker glanced over at him. “Don’t play on your tablet too long. You’ve got school in the morning.”

  Mikey rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Night,” said Jenna, feeling awkward.

  “Goodnight.”

  They waited until his feet had pounded up the stairs and the bedroom door slammed shut. Ryker turned to her and pulled her back into his arms. He leaned in and nuzzled her neck. “How about you and I get an early night, too?”

  She smiled. “I thought you were never going to ask.”

  He reached down and caught her behind her legs, lifting her into his arms. She stifled a squeal of protest, remembering Mikey upstairs.

  Thumping him on the shoulder, she said, “Put me down! You’ll break your back.”

  “Bullshit.”

  He carried her up the stairs, but the bedroom door was shut. Ryker fumbled unsuccessfully for the handle, so Jenna reached out to open the door and he staggered into the room, both of them trying to hold back their laughter. He planted her on her feet and closed the door behind them.

  Ryker turned to her, the laughter fading. She caught the look in his eye and it wasn’t one of humor. She bit her lower lip in mock coyness as his eyes raked up and down her body. He took a step toward her, pushing her back into the wall behind. His movements were rough and urgent, grabbing at her clothes to yank her t-shirt over her head while she fumbled at the button of his jeans. He pressed her body up against the wall with the length of his own, kissing her hard, his fingers laced in her hair. His kisses were hard enough to leave her lips bruised, but she returned his urgency, their tongues meeting and sliding together. The silver ball of his piercing grated against her tongue, sending shivers of desire through her body. She wanted to get her hands on his naked skin, and she needed to do it right now. She couldn’t stand the idea of any clothing separating them.

  They broke the kiss just long enough to pull t-shirts over their heads and rid each other of their jeans, Ryker losing his shorts with the denim. He grabbed her wrists with one hand, pinning them above her head against the wall behind her, while his other hand delved down, into her panties.

  Held against the wall like this, helpless and at Ryker’s mercy, she moaned as his fingers slid through her pubic hair and down, between her inner lips. He pushed a finger inside her and then added another, curling his digits inward to find the secret spot on her inner wall that made her whole body throb. She cried out with pleasure. He kissed her neck, and across her shoulder, slipping her bra strap down and exposing one breast. His mouth closed over her nipple with a wet heat, his teeth grating.

  Jenna’s breathing became more frantic. Only his hand holding her wrists and his fingers insider her held her up, or her legs would have given out, leaving her in a crumpled heap on the floor.

  Her arousal started to build in a tightened coil deep in her belly, building higher and higher as he increased his movements inside her. She tried to tug her hands away, wanting something to grab hold of, but he held her firm. His teeth gently sank into her nipple, sending a sharp jolt of pain directly down between her legs and she unraveled, crying out her pleasure louder than she meant to.

  Ryker slipped his fingers from her and used his body to hold her up as she collapsed against him. She panted, her forehead rested on his chest, looking down. His arousal was evident, bobbing up to meet her gaze.

  She wanted to repay him.

  Jenna dropped to her knees and held his length in her hand, steadying him. Ryker gazed down at her, his lips slack, his eyes hooded with need. He reached out and put his palms flat against the wall, steadying himself.

  Jenna parted her lips against the shiny, smooth end of him, inhaling the musky scent that was purely Ryker Russo. She licked the salty drop of his desire and then sank her mouth down over his length.

  Ryker gasped above her and she glanced up to see his eyes closed, his lips parted. She swirled her tongue around him and increased her pace and suction. He grew even harder in her mouth and she reached out to gently cup his balls and squeeze.

  His eyes flew open, locking her gaze with his. “Fuck, Jenna,” was all he managed before he reached down to drag her back up again and tore her remaining underwear from her body.

  “Wait,” she said, forcing herself to be sensible. “We need protection.”

  “It’s okay, I’m clean.”

  “Yeah, so am I, but that’s not the only thing to worry about.”

  “Jenna, if you happened to get pregnant, I would be the happiest guy in the world.”

  She kissed him. “You’re crazy. But this isn’t the most stable place I’ve been in my life, so get us some protection.”

  He gave a smirk. “Whatever you want.”

  He grabbed the condom from his drawer and quickly sheathed himself.

  She held her arms out to him and gave him a wicked grin. “Now come here and do me.”

  He slammed her hard against the wall, and hooked one of her legs around his hip, opening her up to him. His hard length pressed against her most intimate part and with a forceful thrust, he pushed up inside her, filling her. Jenna cried out, her head falling back against the wall. Ryker’s mouth was on her throat, grazing her skin with his teeth, as he thrust again and again. She gripped her nails into the muscles of his shoulders, her body jerking with every movement, her heel digging into his taut ass. One of his hands grabbed the curve of her bottom, while the other roughly held her breast. She didn’t care that their love-making was rough and brutal. It was as if he was trying to claim her for his own, fuck her into submission.

  Jenna’s orgasm powered through her, grasping tight to Ryker as he let out a guttural groan and held himself deep inside her.

  They clutched each other, their breathing gradually returning to normal. Ryker dropped a kiss on her shoulder and then pushed her hair away from her face with one hand.

  “I fucking love you, J
enna. Don’t ever leave me, okay?”

  She pressed her lips together. “I love you, too,” she told him.

  But she couldn’t promise she would never leave.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Jenna woke with her heart banging in her chest. Her eyes sprang open. The room smelled different, a scent that was both familiar and frightening. She held her breath, listening, as her eyes gradually grew used to the dark. Her body froze anew. Someone was standing beside the bedroom door.

  Ryker?

  But no, the figure wasn’t Ryker’s build—tall and slender, instead of Ryker’s muscular stature. Her fingers crept out to Ryker’s side of the bed. Her skin met with his warm body.

  The person standing in the doorway definitely wasn’t Ryker.

  Her eyes pricked with tears of fear. Could it be him?

  Her fingers closed around Ryker’s arm and she gave him a shake. He mumbled in his sleep and tried to turn over. She took her eyes off the figure long enough to turn to Ryker.

  “Ryker, wake up!” she hissed. “Someone’s in the room.”

  She flicked her attention back to the spot where the person had stood, but the place was empty, the door ajar by an inch or two.

  “What?” said Ryker, pushing himself to sitting. “What’s wrong?”

  “Someone’s in the house,” she said, almost crying. “He was here. In the room with us. Standing over us. He must still be in the house!”

  Ryker reached out and flicked on his bedside lamp. She squinted in the sudden glare. “Are you sure? It wasn’t a dream?”

  “No, it wasn’t. Please, Ryker!”

  He climbed out of bed, still naked, and went to his closet where he pulled out a baseball bat. He smacked it against his palm and lifted his eyebrows. “I’ll go check it out then.”

  “Jesus, Ryker. At least put on some pants.”

  He grabbed his jeans and pulled them on. Jenna hurried after him, tugging on her own t-shirt and sweat pants.

  “You should stay here,” he told her, turning back to her.

  “No fucking way. I’ve seen enough movies to know how separating ends up.”