Second Chances

by Nicole Andrews Moore

  The action surprised him, the sincerity of it, the outpouring of warmth. He inhaled sharply, but continued to speak. “She is an amazing woman. I would love for you to meet her.” He looked at Sarah and gave a half-smile. “So, anyway, she called a family meeting. She wants everyone she loves to be together one last time while she can enjoy us. You see, the doctors have done everything they can for her. The cancer refused to respond to any of the treatments offered by the doctors. They told her to spend the rest of her time with her family.”

  “Oh, no,” Sarah murmured, tears springing to her eyes. She knew what it was like to lose a parent and she hated that her friend was about to experience it.

  “I’ll be leaving for Myrtle Beach immediately after turning in my grades. That’s where I’ll be spending the entire week. I’ve been working late into the night ever since we spoke in order to prepare for the summer classes so that I won’t have to do any work while I’m there.” He stood up and gazed into the fountain.

  “Your family lives in Myrtle Beach?” Sarah didn’t think she had ever known anyone who lived in such an exotic place.

  “Yup,” he said stretching. “We used to go there for vacations every year growing up. My family had so many great memories of the place that when my parents retired they bought a house on the ocean.”

  “Wow, I’d love to live on the ocean. They must adore it.” Sarah leaned back and tried to imagine what that kind of life must be like.

  “Sarah,” he began tentatively, “would you and Chloe like to join me?” His voice was full of hope.

  Sarah thought for a moment. “I would love to go, but I think you need to be with your family right now, not worrying about entertaining us. Some other time.”

  Brian squatted in front of her. “I’m not asking for you,” he said quietly, ashamed of the admission he was about to make. He swallowed hard before continuing. “I’m asking for me. I don’t want to go alone. Everyone else will be there as a couple or a family. At the end of the day they have each other to vent to, to be with. I don’t want to be alone.” He rested his forehead against her thigh.

  Without thinking, Sarah ran her hand through his hair then over his neck and shoulders. “Are you sure?” She asked carefully after a few moments thought. “I don’t want to be a burden or distraction right now.”

  “No, I’m asking you to be my...” he swallowed again, struggling to say the word that he had grown to detest, “friend.”

  After a moment, Sarah took his head in her hands, forcing him to look at her. The pain was evident in his eyes. She knew how difficult it had been for him to even ask her. He needed her and despite her reservations she had to be there for him. “All right,” she said quietly. “I’ll go. We’ll go.”

  Too soon the three of them were piled into his car. They had discussed flying, but Sarah didn’t want him to waste any more of his frequent flier miles on her. Brian had gone home, showered and taken a three-hour nap. They were on the road by midnight.

  By driving through the night, Brian expected to make great time and arrive shortly after lunch the following day, if they stopped a minimal number of times. And because Sarah was along as a friend, she was determined to make this trip as pain-free as possible. She had given Chloe a little talk before their departure, ensuring the child would be on her best behavior.

  They rode in silence much of the time. At first Sarah didn’t know what to say, so she tried to make polite conversation about which family members she would be meeting upon her arrival.

  “How large a gathering should I expect?” She asked.

  “Whoa, good question,” he replied. “Let me think.” He began the tally in his head and then gave up. “I guess that depends on how much extended family they invite. There could be anywhere from thirty to sixty people present at any given time.”

  “Wow, can your parents’ home accommodate that many people?” Her mind was swimming with images of strangers all but tripping over each other, confined in a small space.

  “Oh, yeah,” he said. “I mean only my siblings will be staying there with their families, but everyone will fit otherwise.”

  They were quiet for a bit then. Sarah was trying hard to picture what this house must be like when Brian interrupted her thoughts. “Um,” he began tentatively, “I don’t know how to tell you this.” She turned to face him expectantly. “We, uh, we have to share a room.” He braced himself for a response.

  “Okay,” she said slowly.

  “And,” he finished, “There’s only one bed.” He watched Sarah for a reaction, but she seemed to be thinking. “So, I thought either we could share the bed, with Chloe on the cot, or I could take the cot and you and Chloe could have the bed.”

  Sarah smiled at this. He was so sensitive to her needs. “How about we play it by ear?” She suggested. Depending on how his mother is, he may need me to hold him this trip, she thought.

  By one-thirty they had pulled up to a huge pale yellow stucco home nearly hidden behind cypress trees and a matching fence with a wrought iron gate. Sarah was awed by the exterior and could only imagine what it must be like inside. “What did your parents do before retirement?” She asked stunned.

  He laughed. “Let’s just say they invested wisely,” he replied.

  The driveway was packed with cars. Everyone had been alerted to their arrival by the intercom at the gate, and so about fifteen individuals were assembled at the door as they walked in. Everyone freely gave warm hugs and boisterous welcomes. If it hadn’t been for the circumstances of their visit, Sarah would have thought of it as any other family reunion.

  Chloe was introduced and sent out to play with a gaggle of children. There was a natural stone pool out back, surrounded by flagstone patios and grassy areas. The children had a huge swing set and tree house. They also had the largest sandbox ever, with its own water supply in the beach and ocean.

  The view nearly took Sarah’s breath away when she was finally led out back by Brian. They had just deposited their bags in the room they would share. The decor was simple and tasteful, the bed queen sized and luxurious. A cot a few feet away from it was already made up to accommodate one of them. Sarah had sized up Brian and felt that it might be a rather uncomfortable fit for him. We’ll see, she reminded herself.

  From the second floor deck it appeared as though they could see forever. Most importantly, she could see Chloe, who was currently busying herself with making friends. The little girl caught sight of her mother, smiled and returned Sarah’s wave with a slight shy one. “She’s ashamed of me already,” Sarah commented.

  Brian merely threw a friendly arm around her. “Come meet my mom,” he said, pulling her down the stairs to the chaise lounger set up next to the pool. An umbrella was planted next to it to provide shade, and a small wooden table littered with tissues, pill bottles, and a glass with a bendy straw, held virtually everything she would need within arm’s reach.

  Mrs. Waite was petite to begin with, but her illness served to make her appear frail, and older than her actual age. She wore a navy blue bandana over her bare scalp, and a white tank top and faded denim shorts completed her attire. The minute Mrs. Waite looked at Sarah it became apparent where Brian’s beautiful expressive eyes came from.

  “I’m so pleased to meet you,” Mrs. Waite said quietly. “Brian told me he had invited a close friend to come with him. Let me have a look at you.” She stared Sarah up and down in a way that made her vaguely uncomfortable. Her own mother had a similar habit, so it wasn’t a completely unusual experience. “Come closer, dear,” Mrs. Waite said lovingly. She gazed deeply into Sarah’s eyes, took her hands and studied them. All the while Brian stood next to her and said nothing.

  “Well,” she said after completing her inspection. “You are on the right path. Your life will only get better.”

  “Well that’s a relief,” Sarah said with a chuckle. “I don’t know how much Brian has told you...”

  “Brian has said nothing to me,” Mrs. Waite interrupted. “I mak
e my own judgments.”

  Sarah tipped her head to one side. She didn’t know how to respond, the only word to escape her lips was, “oh.”

  “I know,” Mrs. Waite concluded with a slight smile, “you think these are the ramblings of a dying woman.” She waved her hand as though to dismiss that notion. “I have always seen. Now is your time of self-discovery. Take your time. It will all turn out in the end.”

  Sarah was confused. She wanted to continue talking to this woman who in so many ways reminded her of her own mother, but they were interrupted by the arrival of more family members. She would ask Brian about all of this later, she decided.

  And so the day passed in a steady stream of introductions as family came and went. The house was reorganized to accommodate the weeklong event. The dining room, for example, was turned into a buffet. People brought dishes to share, men took turns cooking food on the grill, and the result was that everyone was fed without it becoming a burden or responsibility for any one person.

  Eventually Sarah had to escape to their room. Brian came looking for her, only to find her sitting on the bed weeping. He had intended to merely peek in on her, but instead, the moment he saw her tears he came rushing through the door, shoving it closed behind him. He climbed onto the bed next to her and crushed her to him.

  “Sarah, what’s wrong?” He asked concerned.

  She looked up at him with eyes flooding over and murmured, “So much love.” He held her to him a moment longer so she could collect herself. Sarah sniffled and apologized. He pushed her back so that he could lovingly wipe away her tears with a half-smile. “Brian, do you feel it?” She asked. “Do you see it?”

  “What? Feel what? See what?” He was confused.

  She took his hand, pulling him from the bed, and led him over to the window. “Look,” she said pointing, still holding his hand.

  Brian was distracted, utterly aware of their closeness. Slowly, he looked in the direction she had indicated. His mother was resting in the chaise. Family members, some sitting, some standing, all of them smiling, surrounded her. They were full of life, and love.

  “There is so much love here,” Sarah explained. “There is so much emotion. I couldn’t take it anymore. I just felt so much. I thought I would burst from it all.”

  Brian hugged her close. “It’s always like this. My parents raised us to always feel free to express our emotions, to embrace life, and freely give love. These are values they hold dear.” He continued to hold her, but ventured a glance to make sure she wasn’t uncomfortable. Content with what he saw, he spoke again, “When she told me she was dying, I asked if she was afraid. I mean, I was terrified. I couldn’t imagine our family without her. But she told me she wasn’t upset one bit. She admitted to having some regrets, like not seeing me happily “mated for life,” not getting to hold my children, or watching the grandkids graduate, that type of thing.” He paused as Sarah turned to face him, listening intently.

  “She said she’s not afraid of death because she wasn’t afraid to live. She lived a life free of regrets and encouraged me to do the same. My mother is incredible. Even as she lies dying she serves as an example and a source of inspiration for the entire family.”

  Sarah sighed contentedly. “I wish I had a chance to get to know her better. She’s amazing. Your entire family is amazing. Thank you for letting me be a part of it for a little while.” She frowned and looked down again.

  “What is it?” He queried.

  “I just want to do something special for her, for all of you,” Sarah said earnestly.

  Genuinely intrigued, Brian tilted his head to one side as he asked, “Like what?”

  “I don’t know yet, but I’ll let you know. I’ve got a week to figure it out, right?” She wore a pensive expression as she wandered toward the bedroom door.

  “That’s right,” he said wistfully. “Come on. Let’s get back to the family.”

  They went downstairs to join everyone. As they did, Sarah heard snippets of conversation. Everywhere she turned, individuals were talking about what a wonderful woman Mrs. Waite was, or how she had inspired them. Brian shook his head. “Too bad she’s way out there missing all these compliments, huh?” He meant it as a comment on the situation, but for Sarah it became her brainstorm.

  “I know what to do!” She exclaimed excitedly. “We have to call a family meeting tonight after your mother goes to bed.”

  The rest of the evening Sarah was bursting in anticipation. Mrs. Waite reluctantly pulled herself away from the gathering around nine that night. She was tired and held on as long as she could. Brian had spent the afternoon quietly spreading news of the planned meeting. At last, they were all gathered in the family room.

  “The floor is yours, Sarah,” Brian announced.

  Sarah flushed. “Come on,” she hissed, “this is your family. I’m an outsider. You tell them.”

  He shook his head resolutely. “This is your idea, you share it.” He pushed her forward and folded his arms across his chest.

  Sarah groaned and stood before a room of at least thirty expectant faces. She was used to speaking before crowds of strangers, but for some reason she was nervous. She certainly didn’t want to embarrass Brian in any way, and for reasons she couldn’t even pretend to understand, she really cared whether or not his family liked her. “Hi, I’m Sarah,” she began weakly. “I felt compelled to do something for Mrs. Waite. She has an amazing spirit. And I was hoping you might all want to help me out with this.” She looked around the room. They were waiting anxiously for her to disclose her plan.

  “You see,” she continued. “Mrs. Waite is in a pretty special position, and so are all of you. Many people have no idea when their time will come to leave this earth, so they don’t have a chance to share their feelings with their loved ones or see what miracles they have worked with their time.” She swallowed nervously. “Because we know her time is short, I propose we hold an Irish Wake for her this Friday.”

  “What’s that?” A voice sounded from the back of the room.

  “I’m glad you asked,” Sarah said taking a deep calming breath. “It is sort of like a memorial service, only the person being memorialized gets to be there and participate. Your mother would have the opportunity to hear all the wonderful things that you think of her and appreciate her for.” People throughout the room were beginning to smile. “You could sit back and tell stories, plant a tree, share your thoughts and feelings. It can be whatever you make it, but mostly it will be something special for all of you, a lasting memory.”

  There were murmurings throughout the room, but no one had addressed the group. “Well, I like it,” Brian announced. He walked over to Sarah, gave her a hug and said, “Thank you for sharing this idea with us.” He turned to the room. “Well, what do you think?”

  The room erupted. Everyone had an idea. Brian took over, and Sarah took notes. By midnight, everyone was assigned a task. Hotel rooms were booked. Friends and former neighbors were called. Anyone who had known Mrs. Waite was invited. The menu was planned. A shopping list was created. And in a heartbeat, Sarah had gone from guest to integral member of the family.

  By the time they dropped into bed that night, Sarah could barely move. “Oh, my shoulders,” she moaned. “I must have been really tense.”

  “Go get changed,” Brian instructed, throwing her a t-shirt and pointing her toward the bathroom.

  When she returned, the sheets were pulled back and Brian had undressed. Wearing only shorts, he sat patiently on the bed awaiting her return. “Where do you want me to sleep?” He asked, glancing over at Chloe, sleeping comfortably on the narrow cot.

  Inhaling nervously, Sarah replied, “You can sleep here, I guess.”

  He smiled wickedly. “Good, then I guess I’ll massage those shoulders after all.”

  After less than five minutes of his therapeutic touch, Sarah had drifted off to sleep. That was when Brian felt most comfortable talking to her, when he knew she wouldn’t hear him. “I love you
, Sarah,” he murmured, still massaging her back with a gentle touch. “You are amazing. Thank you for doing this for my family. Thank you for coming here with me.” He leaned over to sniff her hair. He rubbed his cheek against hers then kissed her ever so lightly on the temple.

  Tonight he would sleep well. His dreams would be sweet. In fact, he thought he’d probably sleep well all week. He would have Sarah next to him all those nights, as long as he could keep himself in check. He had to behave, had to be trustworthy.

  The week flew by, but the energy and anticipation only seemed to grow. Every day someone else would come up with an idea for the Irish Wake. Sarah’s only fear was that it would grow too big for Mrs. Waite to handle. Whether the rest of the family had noticed or not, Mrs. Waite appeared to be growing weaker with each passing day.

  Thursday night, Mrs. Waite asked to speak with Sarah in her room. She had decided to go to bed just after the sun set that evening. Sarah knocked lightly on the door of the master bedroom.