The Days of Redemption

by Shelley Shepard Gray

  “Plus, I already have a haus,” John said.

  “We won’t be needing any gifts or money,” Lorene added.

  “And a simple meal of sandwiches would be fine,” John added as he stepped a little bit closer to his bride-to-be. “All we really want is to exchange our vows. Finally, after all this time.”

  While Marie and Mary Beth exchanged exasperated glances, Viola and Elsie sighed at the romance of it all.

  But then his mother’s voice cut through the happy atmosphere. “Nonsense,” she said.

  The room went silent.

  As Lorene looked like she was about to take John and leave for good, Peter tried to settle the room. “Mamm,” he said sharply. “This is Lorene’s day. We need to honor that. We’ll make do.”

  “We will not simply be making do. This is my youngest maydel’s wedding, and we are hardworking, smart, and capable people. We’ll do this right.” Clapping her hands, she eyed Roman, Aaron, Peter, and John. “You men need to leave. Go sit in the parlor and talk or watch the fire or something. We women have things to do.”

  Viola laughed delightedly. “Mommi, you really think we can put on a proper wedding in one month, don’tcha?”

  “There is no doubt in my mind that we can.”

  As Marie and Mary Beth started to smile, relief poured through Peter. This excitement felt like a balm to the many sore feelings in the room.

  Raising his voice, he said, “Men, you heard my mother. We’re not needed here.”

  “Thank the good Lord,” Sam said.

  “Don’t have to ask me twice,” Roman added.

  Only John Miller hesitated. “Will you be all right, Lorene?”

  “Oh my goodness! She’ll be fine, John,” Mary Beth said. “Now, out you go.”

  As the men walked out, Lorene stared at her mother in surprise. At first she yearned to question her mother’s sudden enthusiasm, but a sixth sense warned her to keep quiet. This, she realized, was her way of apologizing. Either Lorene could give in gracefully or pick a fight. Neither would undo the past ten years.

  Thankfully, she was old and wise enough to choose the right path. “Danke, Mamm,” she said simply.

  “It’s nothing.” Her mother’s smile was awkward and stilted. But present. “I, for one, think sometimes girls get too wrapped up in the busyness of planning a wedding. I’d rather do things like this. Quickly.”

  “Heaven knows it couldn’t be any quicker,” her sister-in-law Mary Beth murmured.

  “Aunt Mary Beth!” Viola screeched. “I can’t believe you said that.”

  “It’s true,” Lorene said with a shrug. “I’m eager to be John’s frau. I can’t deny it.”

  “I, uh, do believe I’ll make us some coffee.” Marie stood up, obviously a little frazzled.

  Turning their way, Lovina said, “Elsie, you or your sister go find me a pencil and a notebook. We’ll need to begin some lists.”

  Elsie immediately got to her feet, though Lorene noticed she smiled in her grandmother’s direction. Then before another minute passed, she placed two pencils and a thick notebook in front of their matriarch.

  Lovina picked up the pencil and tapped it experimentally on the paper before looking at the group of them. “There’s only one thing to do in an instance like this,” she announced.

  “And what is that?” Lorene asked.

  “We’re going to need to make decisions fast, then split up. Lorene, will 7UP Chicken do?”

  “Of course.”

  “What about mashed potatoes, corn, and peas? Stuffing and salad?”

  “Those will be fine,” she replied. Realizing, as they all did, that her mother had just named the traditional meal of any wedding luncheon.

  “And date-nut pudding? And cake, too?”

  “Yes to all of it,” she said with a smile.

  “Colors?”

  “Lovina, I don’t think we’ll need to worry about that. . . .”

  “Nonsense, Marie. I can still sew a dress in a day. If I’m not cooking, I’ll be able to make everyone’s dress with Viola’s help.” She arched an eyebrow in Viola’s direction.

  Lorene half expected Viola to balk at the sudden job. After all, she had a job at Daybreak. But she merely nodded solemnly. “Jah, Mommi. I can help you sew as much as you want.”

  “Gut.” She tapped her pencil again. “Make a decision, and be quick about it, Lorene. You’ve waited long enough for this day. Surely you’ve had something in mind during all this time?”

  Oh, but her mother could make paint wish itself away! “I’ve always fancied pink,” she admitted, feeling a little self-conscious.

  The room fell silent, and she blushed to the roots of her hair as she realized that to everyone else she was a thirty-two-year-old spinster. She was long past the age of pink dresses.

  Her mother cleared her throat and looked at her until Lorene could stand it no more and met her gaze. “I think pink is a gut choice, Lorene.”

  “I do, too,” Marie said with an understanding smile. “And pink will look lovely on everyone.”

  Lorene felt her eyes prick with tears of happiness. Finally, she was planning her wedding day. Finally, she was sitting with women that she loved, and she was the focus of the blushes and giggles of amusement.

  It was embarrassing and prideful and lovely. It was everything she’d given up on.

  “Lorene?” John’s voice said from the doorway. “Lorene, are you crying? Is anything wrong?”

  As Elsie handed her a tissue, she smiled at John. “Don’t you worry, John Miller. Your Lorene is just fine.”

  “Then why is she crying?”

  “Because she’s happy, of course,” Elsie declared. Just as the other women laughed and John’s eyes widened.

  They all heard the other men teasing him, loudly and boisterously. “That’s what you get for going in there, man!”

  The women around her giggled as Marie placed a cup of coffee to her right. “You go ahead and cry, dear. After all, this moment only happens once.”

  Lorene knew that to be true.

  Late that night, Elsie rolled over on her side and whispered in the dark, “Viola, are you awake?”

  “Uh-huh.” She’d spent the last hour sitting in the dark, hoping for sleep but knowing it wasn’t going to come anytime soon. All she could seem to do was think about Ed in Belize and wonder how his trip was going . . . all while doing her best to not miss him so much.

  It had been an impossible task.

  “Tonight was wunderbaar, don’tcha think?”

  “It was.”

  Elsie’s voice turned dreamy. “I know Aunt Lorene is wishing all this had happened years ago, but her marrying John on the spur of the moment is sure romantic, ain’t so?”

  “Jah.” It had been romantic, the way Lorene had looked so in love and how John looked like he could hardly stand to be away from her. The whole family had hardly been able to keep their eyes off the pair, not even their grandmother. More than once Viola had seen her grandmother’s expression soften as she looked at Lorene.

  And it had been so sweet of her to offer to sew all the dresses. Viola hadn’t even minded being recruited in the project without being asked.

  Of course, if the night had been so wonderful, why had she felt like crying every time she saw Lorene and John together?

  Why did she feel like crying now?

  As if in answer, tears appeared in her eyes. Rolling onto her back, she swiped at her eyes.

  “Viola, what if that never happens to us?” Elsie’s voice was hesitant.

  “You mean marriage?” To be honest, she’d never imagined Elsie ever getting married. With her sister’s eyesight getting worse with each year, Viola had always assumed that they’d all take care of her. That she’d live with either her or Roman or even her parents.

  “Of course, marriage.”

  “Well, I am sure we’ll find the right men. Eventually.”

  “Haven’t you already found him?”

  “You mean Ed
ward?”

  “Of course.” Impatience pierced her tone. “Come now, Viola. You aren’t living in a closed box. We’ve all been watching, and we all reckon you’ve fallen in lieb. I mean, you have, haven’t you?”

  Well, she wasn’t sure. She’d always expected love to feel warmer, safer. Instead, she felt like she was perched on the edge of a cliff, and she was holding on tightly to her past because the future seemed far too scary.

  However, Edward did make her feel more alive. When she was around him, she felt as if every nerve had been awakened. Like she’d suddenly begun a brand-new day, and the past, the rest of her life before him, had been spent asleep.

  “Hey . . . Viola?”

  “I’m still awake.”

  “Well? What is happening with you and Edward?”

  “Nothing. He’s in Belize.”

  “I know that.”

  “Well, you don’t know everything, Twin.” Swallowing hard, she added, “He was asked to be the head of the mission there. If he accepts the job, he’ll be gone for five years.”

  “That’s a mighty long time to be apart.”

  “It feels like a lifetime.”

  After a moment, Elsie said, “But you could go, right?”

  “Me? In Belize?” She laughed softly. “What would I do there?”

  “You’d be Ed’s wife, of course.”

  “I’d be far away, Elsie. I couldn’t come home whenever I needed to.”

  “But you’d already be home, right?”

  Viola propped herself up on her elbows. “Do you hear what you’re saying?”

  “I’m saying that if you married him and moved away, you’d be growing up, and moving on.”

  Elsie always was too practical. “No, I wouldn’t be growing up and moving on. I’d be leaving my job and my family and everything I ever knew. I’d be foolish.” Plus, who would look out for Elsie if she was gone?

  Pure silence met her declaration.

  Now it was Viola who was calling out her sister’s name. “Elsie?”

  “Sorry. Ah, yes. I suppose you have a point.”

  “I know I do.” Feeling more confident, she added, “Twin, your problem is that you’re getting swept away by the romance of it all. But in the light of day, a woman must be able to look at her man and her life and know that she made the right decision.”

  When Elsie didn’t reply, Viola flopped over on her side and stared at the blank wall. And tried to find comfort in knowing that for the foreseeable future, this would be her room, and her bed, and what she would see when she went to sleep for the next year.

  And she tried to find comfort in that.

  She tried to find any comfort in it at all.

  chapter twenty-four

  When Mr. Cross met him at baggage claim in Columbus, Ed was so exhausted from the trip, he was really glad to see a familiar face. “Thank you for picking me up.”

  “It was no problem,” the CAMA director said, looking especially pleased. “Actually, I heard such good reports about your visit, I was anxious to hear news firsthand.”

  Ed was eager to share news from his trip. From the moment he’d arrived in the country, he’d felt as if the Lord had been with him. The residents of the area had been open and helpful, and there wasn’t any of the lingering sense of danger that had always felt present in Nicaragua. Instead, he’d felt called to the villages that they visited, and had felt accepted and wanted by the villagers.

  But how did he put such feelings into words? He needed to relay facts and statistics, not warm feelings and emotions.

  As he grabbed his duffel bag, he said, “The building CAMA purchased is in good condition. There’s quite a bit of room. We should be able to house six or seven people easily, as well as a large assortment of supplies.”

  Mr. Cross nodded as they walked out the automatic sliding door and into the parking garage. “Good. That’s good.”

  The temperature hovered near freezing. Ed shivered. Already his body had acclimated itself to the warmer climate. He’d taken his body’s ability to accept the humidity and warm temperatures easily as yet another sign that moving to Belize was the right choice.

  After they got in his truck and the heat was blasting, Mr. Cross turned to him. “Are you hungry? We can stop somewhere, or even go through a drive-thru before we hit the road back to Berlin.”

  “I am hungry. But I don’t care where we go.”

  “There’s a Wendy’s up here. How about we get that?”

  “That works for me.”

  Ed ate while his boss followed the car’s navigational system to get onto Highway 62.

  By the time they were on the road, Ed had wolfed down his burger, and he had a better idea of what to report. “There was real interest in our bundle project, and in our food and clothing programs. I found a few people who have a real relationship with Christ who want to make the mission a success.” He continued some more, discussing his ideas for growth, his targeted plans for the next year, as well as some personal reflections.

  Even he heard the excitement in his voice as they zipped toward home. In many ways, his mind was still on the island.

  “You’ve done an amazing amount of work in a short amount of time, Ed,” Mr. Cross said as he continued down the windy two-laned highway toward Berlin. “I know the people you serve will be in good hands when you return. God has blessed us all.”

  That caught him off guard. He’d only committed to going on this short trip—not accepting the five-year commitment. He thought he was clear that he needed to make sure the calling felt right. And while part of him wanted to accept without reservations, he still wasn’t a hundred percent sure that he was ready to head up the Belize office. Not yet. Not until he talked to Viola and his father again. “I still need to do some thinking about this,” he said.

  “Truly? You sounded so enthused about Belize on the phone. We were sure it was a perfect placement for you.”

  It did feel perfect, so much so that Ed had felt as if the Lord really did want him to head to Belize. But before he’d been asked to go, he’d begun to feel at home in Berlin all over again. “It was a good fit, but I still need to pray about this. And to talk to some people who are important to me.”

  “Your father?”

  “Yes. And, well, there’s a woman, too.”

  “Ah.” The lines around his mouth softened. “I didn’t know you had someone special in your life, Ed.”

  “It’s kind of a sudden thing.”

  “I’m sure you know that we have several married missionaries in the field. Of course, we’d pay for your wife’s traveling expenses, too. We want you to be able to concentrate on your job, not be missing her.”

  “We haven’t gotten that far.” As he glanced out the window, watching the fields and farmhouses pass by, he wondered what it was going to take to convince Viola to take a chance on them.

  No, that wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted her to believe in them so much that she couldn’t imagine another life but one by his side.

  How did that happen?

  “I see.” Mr. Cross’s voice was deflated. “Ed, I don’t need to tell you that people’s lives are at stake. I need you to be completely on board with this plan.”

  “I know. And I will be. I just need a few days to finalize my decision. And to talk to Viola.”

  “I hope that’s all it will take.”

  Ed didn’t care for the criticism he heard in his boss’s voice. “Two weeks ago, I was looking forward to several months of reconnecting with my father and getting acclimated in my home. Now you are expecting me to change everything I’d planned on in a matter of days. I understand the urgency, but I’m asking you to understand that I will only be able to go if I feel it is the only right decision. If I’m torn, I won’t be any good for anyone.”

  “You’re right, of course. But Edward, as much as I’d like to give you all the time you need, the fact of the matter is I simply cannot.”

  “I understand. I promise, I’ll do my best
to make a decision soon.”

  Mr. Cross nodded, but the friendly, celebratory mood in his vehicle turned to a strained silence.

  Ed began counting the minutes until he was home.

  The next morning, Ed still felt exhausted. When he arrived at Daybreak, he greeted Nancy, put his coat and hat in the cloakroom, then walked toward the back parlor. As he got closer, Ed found himself listening for his father’s voice, for the laughter that seemed to be so much a part of his life here.

  And sure enough, as he turned the corner and was just steps away from the parlor, he heard his father, Mr. Showalter, and Viola Keim all having another one of their silly arguments.

  He faltered, rethinking his timing. Was he ready to announce his news to everyone at the same time?

  But of course, it wasn’t like he had a choice. Everyone was going to be curious.

  Bracing himself, he walked through the doorway and kept a smile on his face as his two favorite people in the world stopped abruptly and stared at him.

  “You’re back,” his daed murmured.

  “I got home last night. I was going to call you, call both of you this morning, but decided it would be better to see you in person.”

  His father held out a hand. Ed clasped it, then gently enfolded his dad in his arms, hugging him tightly. “Daed, are you feeling better?”

  His father patted his back, then pushed him away so they could see each other’s face. “I’m fine. As I told you, it was just a cold.”

  He couldn’t go another moment without meeting Viola’s gaze. “I’m glad you are here, too.”

  She took a seat.

  He could have sworn her hands were shaking, but he could have very well misjudged that. “How are you, Viola?”

  “I’m well.” Scooting closer, she said, “Don’t keep us in suspense, Edward. Tell us about Belize.”

  He drew a deep breath, wondering where to start. “Well, first off, it is very beautiful.” Slowly, he began to talk about the island, and the hills, and the people there. He told them about the small Amish and Mennonite population of hardy farmers. They’d begun to settle in the area around 2006 and had quickly become a respected community in the area.