Complete Works of J. M. Barrie
Page 272
PAUL. Armitage, begone!
ARMITAGE. Come, sir, I insist. I am your best man, and don’t give me the slip again. Why, the guests are beginning to arrive.
MARGARET. Already! (jumping up.)
ARMITAGE. I heard Mr. Fairbairn say that Lady Janet Dunwoodie’s carriage is in the avenue.
MARGARET. Aunt Janet!
(runs out gleefully.)
ARMITAGE (surveying paul). A bit nervous?
PAUL (BOLDLY). Not in the least.
ARMITAGE. You look like a ghost.
PAUL (nervously). Stop it!
ARMITAGE (observing train). Hallo, what’s this?
PAUL (not paying much attention and thinking about other things). Margaret’s train. She took it off.
ARMITAGE. And leaves it lying about in this careless way! Hasn’t even rolled it up! Upon my soul, I think you have both gone crazy, and if I wasn’t here to take charge of you I believe the marriage would never come off. Disgraceful!
(folds up train and puts it in ingle-nook.) There now, that’s what I call tidy.
PAUL (who has been communing with himself). Armitage, this Aunt Janet — I don’t know her, though she lives near here, and Margaret is very anxious that she should like me.
(ANXIOUSLY) Do you think she will like me?
ARMITAGE. I shouldn’t think so. You are not the sort of man I would fancy if I were a woman. Shouldn’t wonder if she were to dote on me, though.
PAUL. She is said to be very formidable. A GRANDE DAME.
ARMITAGE. I thought there were no Scotch GRANDES DAMES.
PAUL. My young friend, there are only Scotch ones.
ARMITAGE. You alarm me. Married?
PAUL. No. Fairbairn told me she was once engaged, but broke off the marriage on discovering that the man — well, she discovered something about a woman.
(He speaks in a pained voice, ARMITAGE looks at him cynically, PAUL turns away, unable to face him. MARGARET enters with LADY JANET. She is an aristocratic, haughty old lady, with a sense of humour and a suspicion of young gentlemen.)
MARGARET. Paul, here is Aunt Janet!
LADY JANET. Is this Mr. Digby? (Looking at ARMITAGE.)
ARMITAGE (with a complacency that ruffles all her feathers). Only his best man, Lady Janet.
LADY JANET (with excessive politeness). I’M glad OF that.
(It dawns slowly on ARMITAGE that she is not paying him a compliment.)
MARGARET. This is Paul, auntie.
(PAUL comes forward and bows, LADY JANET shakes hands.)
LADY JANET. I seem to know your face, Mr. Digby. Ever been in this part of the world before?
PAUL. Only once — before I knew Margaret — I was sketching, eighteen months ago.
LADY JANET. Ah, indeed.
MARGARET. That was how it began, auntie, though I didn’t meet him then. But father met him and that led to his asking father to go and see his pictures when we were next in London. And that led to MY going to the studio — and that led to — to —
(She blushes.)
ARMITAGE (WILLING TO GIVE HER LADYSHIP ANOTHER CHANCE). To my wanting to lead him off now, to curl his hair.
(LADY JANET surveys him, and ARMITAGE’S complacency again deserts him.)
LADY JANET (to MARGARET). Then I knew him before you did. (TO PAUL) I was sure I remembered your face. I saw you — it must have been on that occasion you speak of — you were making a sketch — let me see — of some fishing-boats.
PAUL (smiling).! Remember — and you asked to see the sketch — you didn’t think much of it!
LADY JANET. I liked the boats, but the figure was wrong. You should have had a boatman or a fisher-girl — instead of an elegantly dressed lady. Who was she, by-the-bye?
PAUL (with an effort). She was — a lady who happened to be there — so I put her in.
LADY JANET. I see. (turns to look at presents.)
MARGARET (brightly). There, Captain Armitage, you can take him away and curl his hair now.
ARMITAGE. Come along, young man! (HE MAKES A LAST ATTEMPT TO IMPRESS lady janet.) I am a great hand at haircurling, Lady Janet.
(he reflects, then exits hastily after paul.)
LADY JANET. What a lot of ugly presents you have got, Margaret!
MARGARET. They are sweet! But never mind the presents, auntie. Do you like my wedding gown?
LADY JANET. Delicious.
MARGARET. This is the train. (LOOKS FOR IT.) Why — what — ah, I can see, my maid has been in and carried it off. (EFFUSIVELY) Auntie, what do you think of HIM? Isn’t he heavenly?
LADY JANET (TANTALISINGLY). Hum!
MARGARET. Auntie!
LADY JANET. There, there, you goose — I like him.
(MARGARET KISSES HER HAND.)
Ah, you baby, you are only ten years old.
MARGARET. Eighteen.
LADY JANET. Ten. You were ten when your mother died, and your father has kept you at that — like a stopped clock.
MARGARET. Well, Paul likes me at ten.
LADY JANET. We all like you at ten, but —
MARGARET. And if I am more ignorant than most girls, Aunt Janet, it was father who brought me up so. It is his theory.
LADY JANET. Or is it only his laziness? Easy-going Fairbairn, we used to call him, and Look-on-the-bright-side Fairbairn and Hope-for-the-best Fairbairn. They were phrases always in his mouth.
MARGARET. Father is very clever; he is an optimist.
LADY JANET. All lazy men are.
(MARGARET IS OFFENDED, lady janet RISES AND PETS HER.)
Well, goodbye, dear little Margaret Fairbairn. In a few minutes there will be no Margaret Fairbairn in the world — a Mrs. Paul Digby will have taken her place.
MARGARET (TIMIDLY). But she will be the same person. It is only a new label.
LADY JANET (WITH FEELING). My child, it is much more than that.
MARGARET (ALMOST IN A WHISPER). Aunt Janet, last night I was so full of glee and I brought out my wedding gown and blew kisses to it, and I said, ‘O God, make me a good wife to Paul,’ and suddenly, while I was so happy, a cold chill fell upon my heart and I was afraid. (CLINGING TO HER) Aunt Janet, I was afraid.
LADY JANET. I know, my lamb, I know — every woman knows, and not a man among them, not a man. But I cannot help you — I can pray for you, pray that you are being united to a good man, but I cannot guide you. (RATHER BITTERLY) I am only an old maid.
MARGARET (kissing her). Dear!
LADY JANET (BRIGHTLY). Upon my soul, Margaret, I believe I have been jealous of you, filling your head with presentiments on your wedding day.
(ENTER MEIKLE.)
MEIKLE. Begging your pardon, my lady, but the young woman you brought with you —
LADY JANET. Bless me, I had forgotten her —
MARGARET. Your maid?
LADY JANET. No, only a woman — a lady — Is she a lady, Meikle?
MEIKLE. I couldn’t quite make up my mind, my lady.
LADY JANET. Nor could I. But she is English, she told me, and is lodging at one of the villages near here — I don’t know which. I found her by the side of the road, seemingly very faint, and I thought odd — as if she were almost off her head. She kept muttering to herself.
MARGARET. Oh, POOR thing!
LADY JANET. We soon brought her to, and she has recovered her wits, if she ever lost them — but as this was the nearest house I thought the best thing I could do was to bring her here, and ask Meikle to give her a glass of wine.
MARGARET. YES.
MEIKLE. I have done so, miss, and now she says she is able TO WALK home.
MARGARET. Meikle, the poor thing must not walk. Get someone to drive her home. Do you know her?
MEIKLE. Never set eyes on her before.
LADY JANET. She told me she was a Mrs. Ommaney.
MARGARET? A stranger and ill. Have I time to see her, Meikle?
MEIKLE (seeking to dissuade her). Only ten minutes, miss.
MARGARET. Then show her in here.
LADY JANET. Why should you take this trouble, Margaret — on your wedding day, too?
MARGARET. On my wedding day, auntie, I should so love to be kind to everyone.
LADY JANET. Well, I hope she will be more grateful to you than she was to me. She said I was quizzing her — and so I was!
(Enter MEIKLE.)
MEIKLE. Mrs. Ommaney.
(MEIKLE retires when MRS. OMMANEY enters. She is well dressed, rather too gaily, but seems a lady. Her face is pale. She enters quietly and with a lack of interest, but on seeing LADY JANET she bridles.)
MARGARET (to her). Mrs. Ommaney, my aunt has told me that you are ill. Do sit down.
MRS OMMANEY (SITTING AND SPEAKING QUIETLY). I am all right now, thank you. I took no food to-day. That is all.
LADY JANET. Why?
MRS OMMANEY (LISTLESSLY). Oh, I forgot — I had othei things to think of.
LADY JANET. What other things?
(MRS. OMMANEY bridles again.)
MARGARET. Aunt Janet!
LADY JANET. You were very strange in your manner when I found you.
MRS. ommaney (IN DISTRESS). Was I?
LADY JANET. You were muttering to yourself.
MRS OMMANEY (DEFIANTLY). No, I wasn’t. (anxiously)
What was I saying?
LADY JANET. That’s what I want to know.
(MRS. OMMANEY turns on her angrily.)
MARGARET (to LADY JANET). Don’t.
MRS OMMANEY (LOOKING lady janet OVER). You are my lady,’ I understand.
LADY JANET. Yes, but don’t let that terrify you.
MRS OMMANEY. It doesn’t. It is what people used to call me, LADY JANET. Why?
MARGARET (TO mrs ommaney). Don’t answer her.
MRS OMMANEY. Oh, she won’t sleep until she knows. Because my father, who is a Cornish fisherman, educated me beyond my station, with the result that I must needs fly to London. I got into a dressmaker’s shop there. My figure was admired, so I was the woman on whom the gowns were tried, to show them off to customers who were fools enough to think they would look as I looked in them. (LOOKING AT lady Janet’s CLOAK.) Yes, I have tried on that cloak. (EXAMINING IT WITH DELIBERATE IMPERTINENCE.) Yes.
LADY JANET (AMUSED AS WELL AS INDIGNANT). The minx!
MARGARET. Auntie, it serves you right. Mrs. Ommaney, I have ordered a carriage to take you back to your lodgings.
MRS. ommaney. I need no one’s charity.
LADY JANET. There! I told you!
MARGARET. To please me.
MRS. ommaney (INDIFFERENTLY). Oh, very well.
MARGARET. You see, auntie, no one can resist a bride.
MRS OMMANEY. A bride! Are you a bride? (WITH FIRST SHOW OF INTEREST.)
MARGARET. I am to be married — here — in a few minutes.
MRS OMMANEY. Here?
MARGARET. Yes. But you are English, are you not? So you had been married in a church.
MRS OMMANEY (SUSPICIOUSLY). You are prying!
LADY JANET. Of course we are.
MARGARET. No, no!
LADY JANET. Well, I am. That’s where the fun of being an old woman comes in. Why have you come to this part of the world, Mrs. Ommaney?
MARGARET (IN DESPAIR). Oh! (IN COAXING VOICE) Auntie, you have just time to go and take off your bonnet., (LADY JANET affects indignation but MARGARET gets rid of her.)
MRS OMMANEY (IN MENTAL DISTRESS). I wasn’t strange in my manner — I wasn’t — I wasn’t!
MARGARET. No, of course not, Mrs. Ommaney, and do forgive me. Indeed I did not mean to pry.
MRS OMMANEY (WITHOUT MUCH INTEREST). I believe you — you have a good face — I wish you luck. But I don’t care who knows why I am here — (BITTERLY) — I came for a fool’s reason — because I had been here before — an eternity ago.
MARGARET. Alone?
MRS OMMANEY (SHARPLY). No — not alone. I had been happy here once and so I wanted to see the place again. The footpath by the cliffs, the boats in the bay, the cows munching on their way home down green lanes, the little arbour in the wood —
MARGARET. I know — they call it the Lover’s Seat.
MRS OMMANEY. We called it that, too. It seemed so beautiful then!
MARGARET. And now?
MRS OMMANEY. Now the path by the cliff is but a muddy cattle track, and I turned shuddering from the boats and the green lanes and I went to the Lover’s Seat and spat on it.
MARGARET. Ah, I begin to see. He was with you the first time, but when you came back —
MRS OMMANEY. I came back alone. Yes, that’s it. Oh, it’s a common enough story. Turn me out now, revile me.
MARGARET. Revile you! My dear, my dear, I am so sorry for you.
MRS OMMANEY (SURPRISED). You mean it? You sweet girl. I thought you would —
MARGARET. Upbraid you for speaking so bitterly of your loss? No — no!
mrs ommaney (SUDDENLY). But do you understand?
MARGARET. Indeed I do. It flashed upon me when you said those words, ‘I came back alone.’ Your husband is dead now. Mrs. Ommaney, I believe it was your wedding trip. Was it? It was! And I have been speaking of my happiness to you. Can you ever forgive me?
MRS OMMANEY (GRIMLY). I forgive you!
(MR FAIRBAIRN’S VOICE IS HEARD SHOUTING FROM GARDEN.)
MR FAIRBAIRN (OUTSIDE). Come along — we must be there to receive the guests.
MRS OMMANEY. Time I was off. Good luck! (EXIT WEARILY.)
MARGARET. Oh, don’t go!
(ENTER mr fairbairn AND PAUL FROM VERANDAH.)
MR FAIRBAIRN (AFFECTIONATELY). Whom were you speaking to, Margaret?
MARGARET. A poor lady with such a sad history, father. She is a widow.
MR FAIRBAIRN (WHOSE OPTIMISM IS ENTIRELY SINCERE). Dear, dear! But perhaps it was all for the best. Always look on the bright side, Margaret.
PAUL. Is she coming to the wedding?
MARGARET. Oh, no — (SUDDENLY) Paul, shall I ask her?
PAUL. By all means, if you want to.
MARGARET. How good of you! I shall. (EXIT.)
MR FAIRBAIRN. Ah me, to think that I am losing my dear daughter.
PAUL. I should like to think, Mr. Fairbairn, that you could find a bright side even to that, but I fear it is impossible.
MR FAIRBAIRN (REFLECTING). Difficult, but not impossible. I shall smoke in the drawingroom now. And the minister has promised to drop in of an evening. We play draughts together.
(CHUCKLING) He gets so angry when I beat him! I usually beat him!
(Enter ARMITAGE excitedly.)
ARMITAGE. Digby, have you got the ring?
PAUL. Yes. (Feels pockets.) It’s gone! (Is rushing off wildly.)
ARMITAGE (laughing). I’ve got it! (Gives it to PAUL.)
(ENTER MEIKLE IMPORTANTLY.)
MEIKLE. Are you all ready, sir? They are coming.
ARMITAGE. One moment, Meikle.
(Exit MEIKLE.)
Young man, your hour has come. You are about to be turned off. (OFFERING HAND) Friend of my youth, farewell!
(PAUL is wildly putting on gloves.)
PAUL. Stop it, Armitage!
(BLANCHE ENTERS WITH FLOWERS IN BASKET.)
BLANCHE. Buttonholes for you, pretty gentlemen. Oh, Mr. Digby, how you are shaking.
MR FAIRBAIRN. Be calm. Take it easy. Think of something else.
PAUL. I’ve split my glove!
MR FAIRBAIRN. Don’t look at it and you will forget it’s split.
MEIKLE (AT DOOR). The Honourable Mrs. Teviot and the Misses Teviot.
(MRS. TEVIOT and the MISSES TEVIOT enter and shake hands, moving towards centre with PAUL and ARMITAGE while MR. FAIRBAIRN remains near door, BLANCHE goes about giving buttonholes to guests, PAUL has got rid of his nervousness.)