Last Train Home

by Megan Nugen Isbell

  “No, but I don’t think the government has the right to keep American citizens from owning guns. It is in the Constitution after all.”

  “That may be true, but I doubt the Founding Fathers intended for people to have oozies and arsenals in their home,” I said defensively.

  “I don’t think people need those kinds of weapons either, but if the government starts banning certain guns, who’s to say they won’t ban all guns?” He was matching my defensive tone now.

  “You’re being overdramatic.”

  “I am not. You just shouldn’t mess with the Constitution.”

  “I’m not saying that you should.”

  “Well, then how can you argue that people shouldn’t have guns if it’s specifically stated in the Constitution that they have the right to bear arms?” His face was a little red now and I knew this was definitely a hot button issue with him. I immediately thought back to the giant deer’s head I’d seen in his living room and knew guns and hunting were a part of his life and always had been.

  “I never said people shouldn’t have guns. You’re misinterpreting everything I said. I just think there should be a limit. I also think there should be background checks. Guns are scary and too many people are killed needlessly every year because of gun violence.”

  “Guns are not scary, Riley. People who use guns irresponsibly are scary.”

  “Those people couldn’t hurt people if guns weren’t so readily available,” I shot back.

  “Oh no. They wouldn’t hurt anybody,” he said sarcastically. “Guns are the only way to kill people, right? Perhaps we should start outlawing kitchen knives.”

  I just glared at him, realizing we were not going to see eye to eye at all.

  “Perhaps we shouldn’t have agreed to be partners on this project,” I sneered at him.

  “Yeah, maybe not,” he snickered back.

  We both huffed and turned quickly from each other as we worked on opposite walls. I was practically fuming at his ignorance. This is why I hated Kansas. This is why I hated being here. The people here were so backwards.

  “Riley?” he asked a few minutes later and I stopped and turned to him.

  “What?” I asked shortly.

  “Have you ever even shot a gun?” he asked. His voice was calm again and he didn’t sound mad like he had a few minutes before.

  “No, I haven’t.”

  “Maybe that’s why you feel the way you do then. You don’t understand how they work.”

  I stared at him with a glare that told him he didn’t know what he was talking about.

  “I doubt that,” I told him.

  “Well, I’ve got an idea,” he said, as he approached me cautiously.

  “Oh yeah? What’s the idea, Einstein?”

  “Let me take you to the shooting range.”

  I looked at him and burst out laughing.

  “Are you serious?”

  “Dead serious.”

  “You want to take me to the shooting range? You want me to shoot a gun?” I asked doubtfully, the shock plastered all over my face.

  “Yeah, I do,” he said with a playful smirk, the tension between us beginning to melt away.

  I tapped my foot and thought about it for a second.

  “I don’t know,” I said nervously.

  “C’mon. How can you truly form an opinion on guns if you don’t know the first thing about them?”

  I stared at him again and he was looking at me with puppy dog eyes.

  “I’m not going to get killed, am I?”

  “Cross my heart,” he said, making a cross on his chest with his finger.

  “That’s what Brandon said that first night on the four-wheeler and I nearly died.”

  “Oh, please. Brandon did not almost kill you,” he said, rolling his eyes at me. “C’mon, Riley. Just give the shooting range a shot. No pun intended.”

  I stood with my arms folded, thinking.

  “Fine,” I agreed a moment later.

  “Awesome. How ‘bout Friday after school? Then we can get our project done.”

  “Okay,” I said, the reservation heavy in my voice.

  “You seem nervous.”

  “Well, yeah, I kinda am,” I admitted.

  He walked over and put his arm around me and gave me a playful squeeze.

  “There’s no need to be worried. I’ll keep you safe, Boston,” he laughed.

  I wiggled out of his grasp and just glared at him.

  “You’d better,” I said and then we turned back and finished the second coat of paint.

  An hour later, we were done. We put down our rollers and stood admiring our handy work.

  “I love it!” I said excitedly, totally forgetting about our little spat earlier. I was too ecstatic at how awesome my room looked to be bothered by our little difference of opinion.

  “It does look good,” Jesse agreed as he began cleaning up.

  “Now I need to run to Wichita and get a bedspread and stuff to match,” I said excitedly, already envisioning a funky patterned blanket to go with my unorthodox paint color choice.

  “I really appreciate you helping me,” I said as we gathered the paint supplies.

  “No problem. Glad to help,” he said and then he looked up at me with a big smile on his face.

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked.

  He finished putting the lid back on the paint can and then walked over to me. I always forgot how tall Jesse was until he was standing close to me, which wasn’t very often. I couldn’t tear myself from his gaze though as he raised his hand up and touched my hair, his fingers brushing lightly over my cheek. I was frozen for a moment and I found myself getting lost in his gray eyes. I’d never really looked at them before, but now that I was, the color reminded me of Boston Harbor on a foggy morning. My breath began to quicken then at the closeness of him and I found myself drifting towards him, wanting to be closer to him. Then an image of Alex flashed in my mind and I quickly shook my head and stepped back, leaving my hair to fall back onto my cheek and his arm to drop limply to his side.

  “What are you doing?” I snapped at him, my mouth transforming into a stern line. He stared at me for a second, obvious confusion on his face before lowering his eyes.

  “I was just trying to get the paint out of your hair,” he said dejectedly, and then turned around to walk back to the paint supplies he’d been cleaning up.

  “Oh,” I whispered, reaching up and touching the strand of hair Jesse had just held. Sure enough, it was wet with paint and when I pulled my fingers away, they were stained with it too. “I’m sorry, Jesse. I didn’t know. I thought…” My voice was soft and I didn’t quite know what to do and I felt like an idiot for overreacting. “You…you surprised me,” I stuttered, not knowing what else to say.

  “Yeah, I can see that,” he said quietly with his back still turned to me.

  I went over beside him and we gathered everything up, but he still wouldn’t look at me. I’d obviously humiliated him by self-absorbed reaction.

  We took the paint brushes and trays and went outside to wash them off with the hose. We hardly spoke a word to each other and I felt like a complete moron for thinking Jesse was trying to make a move on me. If only I could press rewind and go back and laugh it off instead of allowing it turn into the drama it clearly had.

  “I think I’m gonna head home now,” he said after we’d put everything away in the garage. They were practically the only words he’d said to me in the last fifteen minutes and he didn’t sound happy.

  “Yeah, it’s getting kinda late.”

  “I’ll see you on Monday,” he said and turned to walk over to his Wagoneer.

  “Okay,” I said and watched him as he walked away, but then I called out him. “Jesse!” He stopped halfway to his car and turned and looked at me. His dark brown hair was blowing in the wind and his eyes, which were usually shining, looked dull and I felt doubly bad about what had happened earlier. “Thanks again for your help!”
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  He managed a forced smile and waved before he got in the Jeep. It roared to life and pulled out of the driveway. I watched until he disappeared.

  Chapter Sixteen

  I’d hoped things wouldn’t be weird between Jesse and me on Monday morning. I hadn’t spoken to him since he left my house on Saturday. I couldn’t get the look on his face as he walked to his car that day out of my mind. Jesse was my friend and I had embarrassed him and I felt like a total jerk.

  I hadn’t seen Alex since the party either. He knew I’d be busy painting on Saturday and on Sunday he told me he had to go to Wichita with his parents for dinner at his aunt and uncle’s house, but I missed him and was anxious to see him.

  The weekend had been a bust, especially after the incident with Jesse. I’d spent Sunday reading the rest of Animal Farm, even though it wasn’t due for another week. Ever since we’d painted my room, I didn’t want to leave it. The blue-purple walls were warm and friendly and I loved how it had turned out. My mom and grandma, who had both been skeptical of the color choice, seemed to really like it after seeing the finished product too. I didn’t think they were faking their approval either. I would’ve been able to tell if they were lying.

  Even though I’d barely left my room since painting it, I had to on Monday morning to go to school, which was fine with me. I wanted to see Alex and I wanted to test the waters between Jesse and me. Hopefully he’d forgotten about my ridiculous reaction and things would be cool between us. I wondered if he was still going to take me to the shooting range on Friday.

  When my alarm went off, I rolled out of bed and took a quick shower. I looked through my closet and chose a cute white sundress with a matching cardigan. I decided to change things up with my hair a bit too. Instead of leaving it long and straight like always, I used my curling iron to create loose ringlets in my thick, dark hair. I put on my make-up and after a quick bowl of Lucky Charms, I got in my Jetta and headed to school.

  When I pulled into the parking lot, I saw Alex’s Altima was already there, but Jesse’s Wagoneer was noticeably missing. I grabbed my bag out of the backseat and headed inside. I made my way past the old maroon lockers, which were such eyesores. Thankfully I was finally becoming numb to their presence and hardly noticed them anymore.

  The hallways were already crowded with students and I looked around for Alex as I walked towards my locker. I didn’t see him, and a flood of disappointment washed over me. But then, a moment later, I felt a pair of hands slide around my waist and I felt the disappointment vanish. Those hands could only belong to Alex.

  “Hey, beautiful,” his deep voice whispered in my ear. His breath was warm and sweet against my cheek and I felt my lips start to tingle wanting to kiss him. He spun me around and I was leaning against the locker as he held my hands.

  “Hey,” I said quietly, my cheeks reddening.

  “You look…amazing today,” he said as he continued to stare at me. He reached up and touched my hair, gently tugging on a curl and letting it go so it bounced back into place. I blushed and looked up at him. “I love the hair,” he said touching it again. “Just when I think you can’t get any hotter, you show up looking like this.”

  He began to gently run his finger over my exposed collar bone and I felt shivers shoot up my entire body. He leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips and then pulled back.

  “I don’t think I can hang out with you today,” he said.

  “Why?”

  “I don’t think I can keep my hands off you looking like this,” he said with a sly smile and then turned and started to walk away. “See ya later, Riley.”

  “Hey!” I called out to him. “You can’t ditch me!”

  He kept walking though and I waited patiently for him to turn around, which I knew he eventually would. I didn’t have to wait long and a moment later, he was coming back to me.

  “I was only playing,” he said, taking my hand as we began walking. “You do look incredibly hot today though.”

  “You don’t look so bad yourself,” I said, admiring how good he looked in his jeans and plaid button up shirt. He’d rolled the sleeves up to his elbows and I thought he looked rugged and masculine.

  “Yeah…I think we’re definitely the hottest couple in this school.”

  I laughed as we walked to my first period class.

  “Did you miss me this weekend?” he asked.

  “Of course. Did you miss me?”

  “More than you can know,” he said, stopping us in our tracks as he pulled me to him and began an assault on my lips. I started laughing and pushed him away.

  “Hey! Watch the PDA,” I said playfully, but he kept kissing me. I finally managed to push him away as I laughed. “I gotta go. I’ll see you at lunch,” I said and turned to walk into my class, but giving him one more kiss before I left. I heard him sigh and then he smiled at me.

  “You’re killin’ me, Riley!” he called out as I walked away. I turned and shot him a flirtatious wave and he called out again. “Killin’ me!”

  It felt good knowing I had the power today and it put a smile on my face. I was still smiling when I turned into my classroom just as the warning bell rang, but the smile soon faded when I looked towards Jesse’s desk and saw it was empty. I walked down the aisle towards my seat and hoped he wasn’t absent. I sat down and waited for class to start, my foot tapping along with the second hand on the clock. I watched the door as the familiar faces of my Constitution classmates shuffled in, but none of the faces belonged to Jesse. I looked up at the clock and saw there was only a minute left till class began and I was starting to think he wasn’t going to show up. I reached into my bag and pulled out my cell phone, debating whether or not I should text him to make sure he was okay. Before I could decide though, the bell rang and Mr. Barry stood up and began lecturing. I looked at the door once more, hoping Jesse would walk in, but after a few more minutes passed, I concluded I probably wouldn’t be seeing Jesse today. But then, much to my relief, Jesse came rushing through the door, causing Mr. Barry’s head to turn in annoyance. He waved apologetically towards the teacher and then hurried to his seat. He seemed flustered and he didn’t even look in my direction as he sat down. It was obvious he hadn’t forgotten about Saturday. He always acknowledged me, but today it was as if I didn’t exist. I sighed and turned my head forward and focused on Mr. Barry, who was standing in front of the class with his usual tweed coat, and I couldn’t help but notice his mustache looked exceptionally bushy today.

  Mr. Barry told us we’d be going to the media center to work on our projects. I was happy I’d have the chance to talk to Jesse, but I was nervous too. I’d made such an ass of myself on Saturday and I still shuddered when I thought of the look on his face when I’d jumped away from him like he was a disease.

  We all started gathering our things and followed Mr. Barry into the hallway. Jesse walked a few feet ahead of me and I quickened my step until I was beside him.

  “Hey,” I said, trying to sound casual.

  “Hey, Riley,” he said, looking over to me quickly and then turned his head forward again.

  “I was afraid you were absent today.”

  “I had a little car trouble this morning.”

  “That sucks. I’m sorry.”

  “It’s fine,” he said and we were quiet until we got to the media center, which was really just a library and computer lab.

  Jesse and I walked to a table in the back. I draped my bag on the back of a chair and then sat down. He sat next to me and pulled out a notebook and his textbook. He began flipping through it silently. The tension between us was killing me.

  “Jesse?” I said quietly and he raised his gray eyes to meet mine, but didn’t say anything. “I’m sorry about Saturday.”

  “It’s fine,” he said as he looked back to his book.

  “I totally overreacted. I don’t know what my deal was,” I whispered, desperate for him to look at me with the warm smile he usually did.

  “You’re worrying way
too much about this,” he said and I thought I saw him give me a partial smile.

  “I just want to make sure everything’s cool between us.”

  “It is.”

  “But…there’s been this…this weird vibe between us since it happened,” I stuttered.

  He looked up at me again and I saw his smile fade, but he didn’t look mad. He looked like he was thinking about what to say.

  “Yeah, there has been,” he finally admitted.

  “You just surprised me and I overreacted. I’m sorry,” I said, looking at him pleadingly and we were quiet for a few moments before he responded.

  “It’s okay. I can see how you might’ve misconstrued what happened. I should’ve just told you you had paint in your hair.” He smiled at me finally with the warm smile I was used to and I thought things might be okay between us. “And I think I’m over the fact that you jumped back like I had the plague when I touched you. I didn’t know I was so repulsive.” He was laughing, but I knew there was truth to his statement.

  “No!” I exclaimed in an excited whisper. “I didn’t think that. I promise. You just surprised me. I swear…”

  He laughed again and then rested his hand gently on top of mine in a nonverbal way of telling me to shut up.

  “Relax. I was only kidding.”

  I smiled at him and then gestured to our hands.

  “See, I don’t find you repulsive. I didn’t pull back this time.”

  “You’ve restored my self-esteem,” he said, removing his hand and then looking back to his book.

  “So everything’s good between us, right?” He looked at me and nodded. “And you’re still taking me to the shooting range on Friday?”

  “I wouldn’t miss that for the world.”

  “Awesome,” I said as relief washed over me.

  “Now, let’s get to work,” Jesse said as he stood up and headed over to the reference section of library.

  ****

  Surprisingly, we’d gotten a lot done on our project during class. I was still waiting to see if mine and Jesse’s little trip to the shooting range would change my views on guns at all though. Our difference of opinion was helping to shape our project into something interesting though.