His Royal Regret: Royals of Lochland Book 2

by Mulliner, Brittney

  I forced a grateful smile. “I’m sure they would appreciate that.”

  It wasn’t like I could turn down money for the animals, but it also wasn’t very impressive. Obviously, he had the means to throw some money at a problem and feel better about himself. If that was all it took, I’d have drained my trust fund and put it all toward the shelters, schools, and orphanages. That wasn’t sustainable though. It took volunteers managing those facilities every single day. It took time and sacrifice. Sure, money would buy food and shots and care for the animals, but only for a time.

  Vanessa knew my stance on this and seemed to sense what was going through my mind.

  “Cian, you should stop by tomorrow and see the shelter. You could shadow Serena.” I shot her a glare hoping she’d get the hint and close her mouth, but she ignored me. “You could see for yourself how much work she puts in and where the donation would go.”

  Cian’s eyes lit up like that was the best idea he’d ever heard. He turned to me. “Would you mind?”

  “Of course.” I tried not to show my nerves. “You can stop by in the morning.”

  “Or you could just go with her.” Vanessa prompted. If she was within reach I’d have kicked her. Or casually pushed her off her stool and onto the floor.

  “Brilliant.” Cian seemed taken with the idea.

  “Well…”I cleared my throat. “I don’t work there tomorrow but you’re free to go see it.”

  Vanessa glared at me. “Where will you be?”

  “The hospital.”

  “Is everything okay?” His worry almost made me smile.

  “Yes, I volunteer in the children’s hospital on the days I’m not at the shelter.

  Cian turned crestfallen. “Well, maybe another time?”

  I nodded dismissively. “Sure.” I tried to keep the sarcasm out of my voice, but judging by the glare David and Vanessa shot me I failed.

  I returned Vanessa’s look. I wouldn’t be acting this awkward if she hadn’t filled my head with all these confusing thoughts. I wasn’t supposed to have hope Cian could be interested in me. I needed to keep space between us. There was nothing but hurt feelings at the end of this, and they would be mine.

  6

  Cian

  I had a plan. A horrible, and possibly disastrous one, but it was all I had. Serena seemed to be avoiding me. I knew it and unfortunately, so did her siblings. As humiliating as it had been to face her blunt rejection with an audience it turned out to work in my favor. I now had them on my team. After we finished eating, Serena excused herself and disappeared into her room. I spent the rest of the evening with Vanessa and David coordinating details and watching the stairs in case Serena decided to rejoin us.

  She didn’t.

  I should have taken that as my answer, but David and Vanessa were insistent. They knew her better. I wanted to trust them. Vanessa claimed to know what Serena wanted, better than her sister did. That was how I found myself en route to the hospital.

  When I told Justin where we were going he was concerned. “Are you injured?”

  I shook my head. “No, I’m fine. I’m visiting a friend.”

  “Are they sick?”

  “No, she works there.”

  The tension in his face and shoulders dissipated. Normally I’d be annoyed my driver was asking personal questions rather than following directions, but I supposed asking to go to the hospital was alarming and generally had negative connotations. Plus, I wanted to talk to take my mind off my nerves.

  “She works in the children’s wing as a volunteer.”

  He nodded as he turned the wheel of the SUV, winding through traffic. “That would be tough.”

  I’ve made my share of visits to children in hospitals and care facilities over the years. The resilience in those young people never ceased to amaze me. They faced horrors most adults couldn’t imagine with dignity and strength.

  I made a mental note to visit more often. I might not be able to heal them or take away their pain, but I could try to make them smile at least for a moment.

  “I imagine it would be.”

  As we pulled into the parking lot, he followed the directions to the children’s wing and parked in front of the sliding doors. He put the car in park but I leaned forward before he could turn it off. “I’ll let myself out.”

  I didn't want to draw any attention. I wasn’t here to draw the press or create a photo op. I wanted to show my support, and see a glimpse of Serena’s world.

  I got out and glanced at the letters above the door, ‘Rothschild Children’s Hospital. Dedicated 2001’.

  I shouldn’t have been as surprised as I felt. Their family had wealth that nearly matched my own and they were a caring, philanthropist people. Of course, Serena wanted to work here and continue their work in a more practical way.

  I smiled at the bright colors and cartoon animals that lined the halls. It was unlike any hospital corridor I’d ever been in. No sterile, uninviting walls and doors. The smell of chemicals and fluids was missing. This was a place of hope and healing.

  I wanted this for the children in Lochland. I’d arrange that when I returned.

  A central desk waited for me at the end of a short hall. A pretty woman a bit older than myself smiled when I approached. She pushed her short blonde hair behind her ear and her gaze met mine. “Hello, how can I help you?”

  I read her name tag and smiled. “Hello Michelle, I’m wondering if Serena might be around.”

  If she was surprised, she didn’t show it. Maybe that was a skill of a nurse, able to hide their emotions from those around them. It would be difficult to hide the sadness from children with little hope of recovery, but it was necessary. I didn’t envy her ability.

  “Serena’s in the playroom. It’s just down the hall. I’ll show you if you’d just sign in.” She pointed to the clipboard in front of me. It read ‘Visitors’ with various handwriting below of names and times.

  “Of course.” I wrote Ken Stewart, my alias, and passed it back to her.

  Her eyes flickered from the name to me and back. She nodded once, printed out a sticker then handed it to me. “Right this way, Mr. Stewart.”

  She led me down the hall to the left, this one decorated with nursery rhyme characters like Humpty Dumpty, a cow jumping over the moon, Peter Piper, Jack and Jill, and Little Bo Peep. It was charming and managed to put a smile on my face despite my growing nerves.

  At the end of the hall, we turned the corner to a large, open room filled with toys, children, and laughter. I watched the kids at various stations coloring, playing with slime and scattered toys, and sitting in front of Serena as she read a picture book. A small boy with a tiny oxygen mask sat on her lap. His eyes darted from the drawings on the pages to her face and back again as if putting together she was telling the story that matched the pictures. A smile broke across his lips and he snuggled against her.

  The scene nearly shattered me.

  Such pure love radiated from the room. Michelle stepped back and I thanked her before moving further into the room. The movement caught Serena’s attention and she paused her reading, staring at me for several seconds before she blinked and went back to the book. That drew the attention of several of the children to me and soon I was being dragged into the room by little hands.

  “You play with me?” A young girl with bright, unruly red hair smiled up at me and pointed to the dolls laying on the ground.

  There was nothing, no threat of war, no international crisis, nothing that could have made me say no.

  “Of course.”

  I sat on the floor across from her and she handed me a male doll. “You be the prince.”

  I smiled and nodded. I straightened the limps and turned the head forward before standing him up waiting for her to make the first move.

  She held up a blonde doll with a bright pink ball gown and hopped her over to mine. “Hi. You’re my prince and you love me.”

  I bobbed my doll up and down. “Yes, my princess. I shall l
ove you forever.”

  Her eyes widened at my words and I realized she probably hadn’t heard my accent before. “You really are a prince!”

  Her words drew the attention of the children around us.

  “You’re a prince?” A girl, a bit older than my new friend, asked with wide eyes.

  I leaned toward her and whispered. “Can you keep a secret?”

  Her eyes grew bigger, somehow, as she nodded.

  I held up my hand to block my mouth from the view of the onlookers. “I am a real prince.”

  I leaned back as her mouth dropped open. “Really?”

  I nodded slowly. She glanced around as her lips curled into a smile. She started giggling and quickly covered her mouth.

  “What?” The redhead asked her. “What did he say?”

  A few of the nearby children began asking the same question. The little blonde looked like she was two seconds away from bursting. Her face grew red and her nervous giggles made her shoulders shake.

  I caught her eye and nodded. She bit her lip then squealed the words to her audience. A dozen heads swung to my direction and suddenly I had the attention of the entire room, including the only other adult.

  A chorus of questions immediately followed. I waited for them to pause, but when I realized that may never happen, I held up my hand and they fell silent.

  “Your friend, Serena, invited me to come see all of you today. I’m visiting from my kingdom and I’m so very pleased to meet all of you.”

  The squeals and cheers were deafening. Serena stood and walked through the maze of little people until she was standing next to me. “Yes, this is my friend Prince Cian. He’s from Lochland and couldn’t wait to come play with you guys.” The children began shouting questions but Serena motioned with her for them to settle. “We’re so lucky he came to see us, but we have to remember to take turns and raise our hands. Can we all do that?”

  The children nodded silently. I was surprised they’d listened so quickly but was grateful. I wanted to play with each of them, but it was already overwhelming. Serena seemed to know exactly what to do. The irony of the situation was not lost on me. I was able to govern a country. Manage parliament and international relationships, but a group of children and things spiraled out of control.

  She led me to a chair and handed me a book. “You can take over storytime. Just make sure you make the voices good.”

  She winked then sat on the floor with the children. I wanted to analyze what her wink meant, but I took in the happy-faces smiling up at me, waiting for me to start and pushed the thought back. I opened the book and started to read.

  “Turn it around.” One voice called out and I obeyed, holding it up so the kids could see the pictures while I attempted to read the story with as much enthusiasm as Serena had done.

  I was about halfway when a felt a hand on my knee. I peered down to see a little girl with short hair and a tube inserted in her nose gazing up at me with wide eyes.

  “Hi, sweetheart,” I said.

  She smiled and patted my knee again. I searched for Serena for help but she simply smiled and raised an eyebrow.

  “Do you want to sit with me?” It was the only guess I had.

  She nodded vigorously. I lifted her onto my leg and she immediately leaned against me with a content expression.

  Serena smiled and nodded for me to continue. I read the story but was overwhelmed. This little girl was so pure, so trusting. Despite whatever aliments she faced in her young life, she hadn’t lost her innocence.

  I wanted to hug her and promise things would be alright. I wanted to protect all of these children from their realities. I understood why this was so important to Serena, why she traveled around the world helping them. I wanted to do what I could. That would be my priority when I got back home. A new focus to go along with the other dozen I try to keep on top of.

  I read two other stories before Serena announced playtime was over and it was time for the kids to go back to rest.

  “Prince Cian will give each of you a hug or a high five on your way out.” She pointed toward the hallway and I made my way over.

  The children lined up and waited their turn. The first few girls asked for a hug then a boy around the age of eight requested a high five. I went through the line until I reached the end where Serena was waiting.

  “Hug or high five?”

  She laughed. “High five.”

  I held up my hand despite how badly I wanted to wrap my arms around her and thank her for today. I might have forced myself into her world, but I was glad I did no matter what the consequences were. She might be mad, but it was all worth it.

  “Thanks for coming today.”

  I nodded, forcing the emotions down. “It was a pleasure. Thank you for allowing me to meet them.”

  “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to intrude but I saw what you were doing for the kids and got pictures for them. Is that okay, sir?” A nurse I didn’t recognize stepped into the room looking a bit nervous.

  Serena shook her head. “Nancy, you shouldn’t—”

  “It’s quite alright as long as the kids get the pictures not the media.”

  Nancy nodded emphatically. “Of course. I just thought they would like a keepsake of the memory, plus I doubt many of their parents would believe it without proof.”

  I chuckled.

  “It’s time for us to go.” Serena stepped between me and Nancy and led me back to the exit.

  Once we were outside, I texted Justin to come back.

  “I really do appreciate you letting me stay,” I say, unable to keep the smile off my face.

  Serena nodded. “You were great with them. They’re going to remember this day for a long time.”

  “You inspired me. When I get back, I want to go to the hospitals. I want to visit more often and I want to make sure the children’s wings are as cheerful as it is here.”

  Her smile widened. “Thank you. When my parents opened this, we wanted to make it warm and inviting. We didn’t want children to be afraid.”

  “You achieved that.” I paused. “Why is this so important to you and your family?”

  Her smile softened. “I had childhood leukemia.”

  “Really? How old were you?”

  “Six. I don’t remember too much of it, fortunately, but David and my parents do. They took such good care of me that my parents wanted to give back and make sure other children received great care in a place they were comfortable.”

  “And that’s why you open orphanages and hospitals?”

  She nodded brimming with pride. “I wanted to pay it forward.”

  “You’re amazing.”

  “I don’t think so. I’m just doing the best I can with what I have available.”

  That struck me. Was I? I had almost everything available to me. Was I doing the best I could? I wanted to say yes, but seeing Serena I knew there’s more I could be doing.

  “You’re an inspiration, Serena.”

  Justin pulled up at the curb. Serena glanced at the car then back to me. “I’ll see you later, Cian.”

  I wanted to ask her to come with me. I could have someone return her car to the house later, but I sensed her dismissal. I’d already intruded in her day, so I simply smiled.

  “I’ll see you soon.”

  I got into the car and pulled my phone out as Justin drove away. I sent an email to my secretary in Lochland asking for her to set up meetings with the major children’s hospitals in the country. I wanted to get started immediately.

  7

  Serena

  I didn't want to think of myself as someone that could be easily influenced, but seeing Cian with the kids had melted my insides. Every wall I’d built up crumbled when he lifted Olivia onto his lap. He was so much more than the demure prince I’d seen. He was caring and gracious and modest.

  He could have turned the afternoon into a publicity stunt, but he came without any press or cameras. He was really there for the children. I could tell they’d
won him over. His eyes grew misty as he read and Olivia snuggled against him. I knew they’d had an effect on him and I was surprisingly happy to share this bit of my world.

  I didn’t do this work for recognition. I didn’t use my last name because I didn’t want the expectations and privileges that came with it. I wanted to do this on my own. It seemed Cian understood that.

  When I pulled into the driveway, the black SUV was parked out front. I took a steadying breath and headed inside. I wanted to thank him for coming, even though I didn't invite him. He didn't have to show up and he didn’t have to stay as long as he did.

  The walls were still down and I wanted to let him in before they rebuilt. I found him in the kitchen staring out over the patio to the view of the city below.

  “Hey.”

  He turned swiftly, his eyes lighting up when they met mine. “I didn't hear you come in.”

  I set my bag on the counter and worked up the courage I needed. “Are you busy for the rest of the day?”

  He shook his head.

  “Can I show you something?”

  “Of course.”

  I had to hurry before I lost the nerve. I wanted to take a moment to change into clean clothes, but I knew that if I was alone, I’d talk myself out of this.

  “Let’s go.”

  He seemed surprised but followed me back outside. Justin jumped out from the driver's side. “Where to, sir?”

  Cian turned to me. “Would you like to drive or shall Justin?”

  I liked that he called his driver by his first name. “Would you mind?”

  Justin smiled with a surprised glint in his eyes and seemed satisfied I’d asked.

  “Great. Can I put the address in your phone?” I asked Justin.

  He handed it to me and I quickly typed it in and passed it back. He opened the back door for me and I slid in followed by Cian.

  It was a quiet thirty-minute drive to the discreetly marked trailhead. I was too nervous to talk. I was sharing something I’d never shared with anyone outside of my family. This was my special place. Somewhere off the maps.