One Little Bit

by Tey Holden

  “Oh, sweetie, I understand. Don’t worry. I know how you feel. I don’t want to go anywhere if you are not feeling well. I’m perfectly happy right here with you.”

  “Adriana, I know I’m being unbearable, you are earning lots of brownie points for this.”

  Addy grinned. “Good, because I intend to cash in my jackpot come the day.” She got up from the sofa, but not before smacking her partner a ‘wet one’ as she called her kisses. Karen grinned happily. She went to the kitchen to check on dinner. When she came back, she sat on the sofa and hugged Karen from the back and kissed her. “What does my baby want? Do you want me to rub your back?”

  Karen pouted and smiled shyly. “Yeah, that would be nice.”

  “Anything for you, sweetie.” Addy hugged her again and kissed her behind the ear.

  ***

  To distract Karen, Addy began to invite JP and James for dinner, dessert or for a nightcap. She also thought that making them feel part of the family might help their reconciliation. They were working on their relationship, but it was obvious that things were still not going well.

  Prior to the first invitation, Addy had asked them to talk about anything but the pregnancy because the whole idea was to take Karen’s mind from any pregnancy issues. This was also consistent with Karen’s wish that she be treated as usual.

  However, although successful at first, the get-togethers had to be stopped because JP became more of a hindrance than help. He was having a very difficult time watching Karen go through her gagging and vomiting, and his comments added to Karen’s overcharged negative mood. When they were all together and Karen had to run the bathroom to throw up, or she started to gag, it was worse dealing with him than with Karen.

  On one night when the four of them were together, JP had a meltdown. “Oh my God! Here, she goes again! Poor thing, this cannot be normal! Have you talked to the doctor? This just doesn’t get any better week after week. I cannot believe that women go through all of this!” James glanced at him with a killer look trying to shut him up, but once JP got on a roll, there was no end. His comments only made it worse for Karen who on top of already feeling miserable, was now being reassured by JP that there was something wrong.

  “JP, it’s okay. This is normal.”

  JP continued. “Addy I don’t know much about this but look at her, she looks drained. Look at her eyes! For God’s sake in all the years that I’ve known Karen, I’ve never seen her so pale and sick. I think we should call the paramedics, or go to the hospital, or something. There must be something they can do, something she can take.” James realized that JP was not contributing to the cause and as soon as he could he suggested leaving.

  Addy was trying to be polite, but inwardly she wanted to kill him. When James suddenly and mercifully announced their departure, Addy was practically opening the door for them. “Yes, I think it’s best. It’ll be good for her to rest.” At this point, Addy felt like choking JP. She could not wait for them to leave. “Thanks, James.”

  “Sorry for the drama, Addy. I’m afraid we weren’t much help.”

  “Don’t worry, James, we’ll survive.”

  James smiled. “I’m sure you will. Hang in there, sweetie.”

  Addy chuckled. “Good night, James.”

  When she closed the door behind them, she went to look for Karen, who had already gone upstairs. Addy found her crying on the bed.

  “Aaawww, baby! What’s going on now?”

  “Let’s not have JP and James over for a while. JP gets on my nerves. I can’t take it. He makes me feel worse. I’m beginning to think this has gone beyond the normal. Maybe we should go see Tiffany.”

  “Okay, I agree. Tonight, I felt like choking him. We’ll take a break from those two. JP can be a little overbearing sometimes. I think all is normal with you, but if seeing Tiffany will make you feel better, we’ll go see her. I’ll call her first thing tomorrow morning.”

  Karen smiled. “Thanks. Can we go to sleep now?”

  “Come on.” They got under the covers and Karen snuggled to her as usual. Addy began to talk in an attempt to take Karen’s mind to another subject.

  “Hey, Ker, did you notice the tension between James and JP?”

  “Yes, I don’t think all is okay with those two, but I don’t want to ask. Let’s not ask. Let them be the ones to tell us.” Karen, as always, was trying to preempt any ‘good intention’ action from Addy.

  “Don’t worry. I’m not going to. They are a couple and whatever is happening is a private matter, none of our business.” Karen could not be happier to hear those words come out of Addy’s mouth.

  “I fear that JP’s indiscretion may have caused irreparable damage.”

  “Addy, you can be so diplomatic sometimes!” She laughed. “You mean with his fucking around?”

  Addy chuckled. “Yes, but that kind of language sounds so much better coming from you.”

  “You know? I feel better when you hold me. I always do.”

  Addy smiled. “If holding you is going to be the cure to your sickness, I’ll glue myself to you. I love holding you. You are soft, smell good, and you are very sexy.” Addy grabbed Karen’s buttocks and massaged them to better convey the message. “I love to grab these babies!”

  Karen chuckled. “I don’t know why. There isn’t much there to grab.”

  Addy smiled, she knew Karen was looking for attention. “That is a matter of opinion. I think there is plenty to hold in this department, and I absolutely love them. They are firm and smooth. I’m totally content with the merchandise.” She kissed Karen several times on the soft skin of her neck but kept her hands on the firm smooth spot where she had them. Karen enjoyed her massage and all the complimentary treats, soon realizing that they were going in the usual direction.

  “Addy?”

  “Umm?”

  “I asked Tiffany about sex.”

  Addy chuckled. “So did I. I didn’t want to leave anything to chance.”

  Karen chuckled. “What did she say to you?”

  “She said that as long as you felt like it, it was okay. She also said that towards the end of the pregnancy, your sex drive might not be there, but that it was normal.”

  “Yeah, she said the same thing to me. Isn’t that awful? Did you ever think that such a thing could happen to me? What are we going to do when that happens?”

  Addy laughed. “No, in truth, I never thought that such a thing could ever happen to you, but we were never under this circumstance. And you have to keep in mind that it’s a temporary happening, so I don’t want you to go all hormonal on me and start crying about that now. We’ll live through it like everyone else.” Addy replied.

  “Yeah, right. It’s going to be worse for you, though. I mean, if I don’t feel like it, I won’t want it. But what about you?”

  “I’ll survive. It’s part of the whole thing, Ker. Adjustments will need to be made and that’s that! Don’t worry about me, okay?”

  “Tiffany also said that it might be difficult towards the end with me getting bigger and all. Although, as long as we want to, I’m sure we can get creative.”

  Addy chuckled. “Creative?”

  “Yeah. I’ve been thinking about it already.”

  Addy continued to chuckle. “Amazing! I think that I will count the days that you don’t feel in the mood, if that ever happens!”

  ***

  After some time passed and Karen began to feel better, they got back into their life routines. “Should we invite the guys for dinner? I’ve talked to them, but we haven’t seen them in a while. I wonder if they patched things up.”

  “Yes, let’s. I feel better, or at least I feel I have this shit under control. If I need to vomit, I’ll quietly go to the bathroom and not tell anyone. You’ll get the signal.”

  “Okay, but I think that you will be fine. It hasn’t happened for a while. Just watch what you eat. Nothing spicy, for sure.”

  “Nothing, spicy, no beer, no wine, Adriana, I hope you appreciate th
e sacrifice I’m making!”

  “Yes, I do.”

  “At least, we can still have sex.”

  “Well, there you go, not all is so bad.” Add always found a way to reinforce the positive.

  Karen grinned and kissed her. “You are my perdition! I knew it the moment I saw you.”

  Addy laughed. “Go call them. I’m going to get started in the kitchen. Addy knew JP and James were sure to come. They had never said no to any of her dinner invitations.

  Of course, Addy cooked one of her finger licking meals, as Karen called them. When she went into one of her creative modes, she could prepare a meal for royalty. She had always been good in the kitchen, but she had often joined Andre and Margo Russoo in their kitchen and had learned a lot from them.

  She’d pair the food and wine like the most knowledgeable sommelier and prepare the perfect dessert to go with it. Of course, Karen couldn’t drink, but that did not mean that the others could not enjoy their favorite alcoholic drink. Addy would make sure to have iced tea or lemonade for Karen. She always prepared hers in a tall glass, with a lemon wedge and any cute little thing she could find just to give the impression that Karen was also having a special drink.

  “Don’t mind me, drink up fellows. I get to enjoy my own special drink also. Plus, when all this is over, Addy and I are going to have an open bar party at the Manor, and I’m going to have all the Martinis I can put down.”

  Addy smiled. She knew that Karen’s talk was the product of wanting something she could not have. In the end, she knew that it would not happen. Karen was not a drinker and it was rare to see her even tipsy, but for now, she just fed the wish by adding to her statement. “We will have gin and vodka from everywhere, and we are going to have a tasting contest.”

  “Well, I don’t want to rain on your parade, but where is the baby going to be while the mothers’ are partying and wasting themselves?” JP asked in his usual mocking tone.

  Addy and Karen looked at each other and smiled. Karen was the one to respond. “I guess we are going to have to get us an overnight sitter because, really, we are not going to be in shape to deal with any little brat.”

  Addy smiled. “Sure.” She knew this was not going to happen either. Karen was the most responsible and committed person in the world, and she knew that she would never leave her child with a stranger to go out and drink. Karen might not have been aware of what she was saying, but Addy was.

  JP sighted. “I don’t know, Karen sometimes I wonder what kind of mother you’ll make.”

  Karen laughed. “Me too! I guess we’ll have to wait and see.”

  “She will make a great mother.” James interjected, preempting any more of JP’s negative comments.

  After dinner, they sat in the living room to talk over coffee. “Listen, girls, we have something we need to talk to you about.” Addy and Karen looked at each other sensing that something ugly was coming. James continued. “We were waiting to make sure you were feeling better, Karen. What we need to tell you is that JP and I have decided to take some time off from each other.”

  The silence was such that you could hear a pin drop. Both women were stunned. Addy was the first one to speak. “Why? What happened now? I thought everything was fine with you guys.” Karen kept looking at JP who, in turn, kept his eyes lowered to avoid hers.

  “No Addy. All is not fine.” James continued. “I will only be taking two weeks off Karen. I’m going back home to San Francisco. I’ve arranged everything at the distillery, so all will be fine until I come back. I will be leaving next Saturday. I will come back in two weeks. You have placed your trust in me and I will not leave you at this moment when you are going to need all the time in the world to care for your little one. Plus, I love what I do and, after giving it a lot of thought, would like to continue to work here.”

  “And you, JP. Will you be staying here?”

  “No, I’m going to New York.”

  “Is this separation just to get some time away from each other, or does this mean that you are going to be seeing other people, assuming the opportunity presents itself?” Addy couldn’t help asking. Karen was startled by the intrusive question, but she was as interested in an answer as Addy. After all, JP and James were not just any couple, they were and had been their best friends and partners in business for many years. They were like family, and with family some infringements were necessary.

  James continued to reply to all of Addy’s questions. “Addy, we will be free to do whatever we want. Unlike you and Karen, we have never entered into any legal arrangement. Even our finances have been kept separate all these years so, nothing holds us together. We have always functioned independently. So, we are pretty much free to do whatever we want.” James words were conclusive and evidenced the state of the relationship.

  “After all this time together, guys, are you sure you don’t want to rethink this?” Addy asked again and looked at everyone, especially at Karen who was very somber and quiet.

  James responded. “Addy, in life you cannot force people to do what they don’t want to do. When people are in a relationship, the only thing that keeps them together is the fact that they both want to be there. You cannot hold people in a situation they don’t want to be because then no one is going to be happy. The best thing to do is to separate and decide what we want, and where is it that we want to be.”

  “What if one wants to be in the relationship and not the other one?” After she asked the question she realized how stupid it was. “I’m sorry guys, I guess I’m not thinking well. This announcement is disheartening. I really don’t know what to say. I thought you guys had something nice going.”

  Karen, who had remained quiet and totally drained of any emotion, finally spoke. “Whose idea is this?”

  “It’s mine, Karen.” James replied.

  “JP may I speak to you in private?”

  “Karen, nothing you say will stop this. It has been decided.” James was firm in his decision.

  “Still, may I speak to JP in private?”

  “Sure.” JP responded as he prepared himself for the onslaught that was coming to him.

  “Let’s go outside.”

  James and Addy remained in the living room. James turned the conversation to how well Karen looked and how the morning sickness had slowly diminished. Of course, Addy told him how sorry she was and that she was hoping for the best, and how much they appreciated the fine job he was doing with the distillery.

  Right after the winery was converted into a distillery, James had assumed its management and was very successful in making the business work. He marketed and promoted the brand and was the reason for their success. James was almost in tears as he heard Addy speak. “However, it’s not just your business skills that we appreciate, James. Karen and I have the highest opinion of you. I can’t begin to tell you what you mean to us. I think JP does not deserve you, if he can’t appreciate you.”

  “Addy, you are going to make me cry if you don’t stop. To make matters worse, all this is happening now of all times when you guys should be focused on the baby and all should be happiness. I envy you. Karen adores you. I know you know that, but I just have to say it. I didn’t know her from before like JP did, but in all my life I have never seen anyone so devoted and loving as her. I remember when you were at the hospital after the accident. She didn’t want to go back to the cottage by herself. She told me she wouldn’t come back without you because it wasn’t home without you. You two have something very special.”

  “I know, James, I know. Thanks.” They hugged in a warm dear and friendly embrace.

  Outside, the story was very different. Karen didn’t really know where to begin. It was extremely painful. She wasn’t screaming, but she was hurting and it showed. “I can’t believe how you fucked this up!” JP remained quiet and looking down.

  “I thought you had matured and grown away from all your bad habits. All it took was one dick and you are out to fuck around again! I really don’t understand wha
t you see in such an empty way of life. I’m not going to say much, but I really want you to weigh all the factors when you are out and about satisfying your lower brain. You are going to end up alone one day and regret all the good you left behind. Think and think hard, because you are about to lose the best thing in your life.”

  JP was still averting Karen’s eyes as she continued to talk. “I know your story well. You never had anyone but your mother to love you and even she let you down. Now you’ve found a fine man, a very fine man, the very best you’ll ever find and you are blowing it off. If there are any brains in that head of yours, you are going to come back over here in two weeks and you are going to beg for forgiveness and pray that that man is man enough to take you back. Not because you don’t have a better offer, but because he is your best shot at happiness. And may I remind you of two things just to end this sad conversation. One, you are not getting any younger and pardon my frankness, but you do look your age. Two, James is three times the man you are, and you are never, ever going to find such a gentle, caring man, who by the way in this humble lesbian’s opinion, happens to be a hunk! I’m sure that if he made himself available, he’d have plenty of takers. I have no more to say to you.” Once done. She walked back inside. JP followed her.

  Back in the living room, she addressed both of them. “Guys, not to be rude or anything like that, but I would like to turn in, and I know Addy’s had a long day preparing the fabulous meal she prepared for us.”

  “Sure, Karen, we’ll be on our way.” James replied immediately. He seemed glad to finally end the evening. “Addy thanks for the feast. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  “Good night James, JP”

  “Good night, Addy.”

  ***

  When they left, Addy went to the kitchen, while Karen made her rounds checking all the doors. When she looked for Addy, she found her in the kitchen cleaning up. She knew that making herself busy was Addy’s defense mechanism when she was nervous and didn’t know how to cope with something. Karen came from behind and wrapped her arms around her. “Stop.”