by KT Strange
It wasn’t broken, I thought, as I stretched it, the bone and muscle screaming at me, my skin feeling abraded through the knit of my sweater. A car door slammed and I looked up.
“Quinn?” Cael Piece stood there, his blue eyes wide. He looked like he was about to be sick as he crossed the distance between us, his long legs swallowing up the ground with big strides. “Shit, are you alright?” He reached down for me as I struggled to sit up, my whole body protesting. Everything hurt. I glanced over my shoulder at where my bike sat, one of it’s wheels bent and spinning off-kilter.
Cael’s hands wrapped around my free wrist, pushing back my sweater with an odd gentleness.
“You hurt?” He asked, then hissed out a breath. I followed his gaze and swallowed. The knit of my sweater hadn’t protected me, and my arm was covered in road-rash, scraped, bloody, and raw. “Can you stand? C’mon.”
His arm wrapped around my waist, and he lifted without waiting for my answer. I hissed out a breath and he hesitated for a second before hauling me up and setting me on my feet. My knees felt shaky, like they’d give out. Cael pulled away, and ran a hand through his hair before holding it out to grab my other arm.
“You’re all cut up,” he said. My tongue felt thick in my mouth, and I wanted to tell him it wasn’t just the cuts. I felt dizzy, like I was gonna-
“Quinn?” His voice cut though the fuzz, as I bent over, hands on my thighs, and vomited hard. I felt him touch me, steadying fingers on my shoulders, his other hand pulling my hair back away from my face. I leaned against his hip, gasping for breath, a horrible shudder crawling up my throat as the acid burned in the back of my nose. “I’ve got water in the car.”
“I’m fine,” I croaked, not wanting his help.
“I nearly hit you, it’s the least I could do,” he said, sounding more than horrified. I glanced up at him, regretting the eye-movement when the world spun.
“Ugh,” I grunted, straightening slowly. “It feels like the ground punched me.”
“It probably did,” he replied, eyeing me carefully. “We should take you to Urgent Care. You need to get looked at. Did you hit your head?”
“I need to get my bike,” I replied, turning around to look at it. It was like a sad corpse, the paint and decals scraped to shit. My uncle had bought it for me. And now it was half-wrecked. That made sadness creep up my throat, and my eyes watered.
“Mia?” Cael asked as I walked toward the bike, my steps as steady as I could them. “Mia, you’re bleeding, c’mon.”
I looked down. Blood was dripping down my arm, slicking over my fingers and I was leaving a trail of red droplets in my wake.
Warmth circled my shoulders and Cael was there, a steady presence. I leaned into him, because I had to, not because I wanted to, and mourned my bike.
“I’ll pay to have it fixed,” he said.
“Somethings can’t be fixed,” I replied, without any venom. Maybe the bike could be fixed, but nothing else in my life could’ve been.
“Let me put it in the bushes here, and we’ll come back for it,” he said, with a cough to clear his throat. “It’s not gonna fit in my car.” I glanced over at what he was driving.
A low, road-hugging Mazda Miata with the top down, purred, it’s door flung open. Thank fuck it hadn’t been a SUV. At least in the Miata he’d been able to see me in time to stop.
The blood was making my skin tingle, and the pain was getting to be a bit much.
“Yeah, okay,” I said. Cael nodded and grabbed my bike, lifting it up and hiding it in the bushes behind a tree. “How’re we gonna know where it is?” I asked. Cael raised an eyebrow at me and pointed a few yards away. The trees, where he’d emerged from, hung low, but there was a gate there, remote-controlled from the looks of it.
“Back entrance to my parent’s estate,” he said, like that was a normal thing.
What’s that? Oh that’s just the servant’s entrance. Where the peasants enter. Like you, Mia.
My thoughts weren’t exactly charitable, but he’d nearly hit me for fuck’s sake. My bike was ruined. I definitely wasn’t going to be wearing anything with short sleeves for awhile.
The pain was making it hard to catch my breath.
“Mia?” Cael’s face frowned as he appeared in front of me, staring down at me. “C’mon, let me help you.”
I would’ve argued, but I was so tired, and my head hurt. Okay, maybe I had hit my head. With a grumble at him, I let him lead me to the car and help me into the low seat. I slumped down into it and closed my eyes.
“Hey, hey, no,” he said, snapping his fingers in front of my face. “Eyes open.” I glared at him. “Good. Glare at me. That’s fine. But keep your eyes open.”
“You’re a real prick, you know that?” My voice sounded flat in my ears, like I didn’t really mean it. Except I did. He was mean. And like, why? He had money. He could afford to be nice. People who had nothing to give were always the kindest. Why did all the rich assholes who had plenty to spare keep it, and their basic manners, to themselves, like they were afraid to spend their precious feelings on being half-decent to the rest of us?
“I see why Buck likes you,” Cael said with a snort as he drove. The wind was in my face and I sighed, sitting up a bit to enjoy it. I really wanted to close my eyes though. A nap sounded amazing.
The trees were slipping by. Always, I was going somewhere, but never really arriving. Hidden River wasn’t my final place. It wasn’t home. Maybe nowhere would ever be. I sighed.
“Coach? Yeah. There was an accident with Mia. She’s okay, I think, but maybe concussed. I’m going to the Urgent Care on 3rd? Do you wanna meet us there?” Cael’s steady voice was a low burr in the background. I closed my eyes. I just wanted to sleep, and never wake up, at least, maybe sleeping would take away the pain I was going through, physically and mentally.
***
“Aw, Mia, don’t do that,” Cael’s words were insistent, and I felt his hand on my shoulder, shaking me lightly. He pinched next, and I growled, eyes popping open to look at him.
“I wasn’t sleeping. I was resting my eyes,” I insisted, looking up. The Urgent Care clinic was lit up in front of us. I reached for the handle on the door. Cael was hopping out of his side of the car, and around to my side, opening the door for me before I could get out. He helped me up, keeping a tight grip on me each step of the way.
“-fuck do you think you’re doing here?” Colt’s voice cut through the waiting room’s silence as we entered. He turned as he heard the doors whooshing open. Behind him stood Shawn and Buck. Seeing them sent a fresh flare of pain through my heart, pulsing out through my veins to my aching arms. Also my hip. I’d banged it hard when I’d hit the ground.
How were they all there? I shot an accusing glance at Cael and he raised an eyebrow at me.
“What?” He asked.
“You called-”
“Your squad of boyfriends? Yeah, I did,” he said, a slight smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “You’re too much trouble for just me to handle until your uncle gets here.”
“Fucker,” I muttered under my breath, waving off Colt as he approached me, concern on his eyes. “No touching, I’m full of ouch and about ready to kick somebody in the balls.” I glanced at Buck, then Shawn, meeting their gazes with a heavy steadiness. I wasn’t afraid to look at them right in their eyes. I wasn’t the one who had anything to be ashamed about.
“Well, my duty’s done,” Cael said, making a show of dusting his hands off and stepping away.
“Nah, I don’t think so. You’re always speeding around in that little fucking convertible, I think maybe you should have a chat with your coach before you bail. Take some goddamn responsibility for your actions,” Colt said, lifting his hand to shove Cael’s shoulder, in a move that could have been friendly, if Colt hadn’t been scowling at Cael.
“I’m gonna go check in,” I said, my stomach swooping funny and making it feel like I was going to puke again. Maybe I could do it on Shawn’s shoes. That was acceptable
punishment, right?
I stood in front of the reception, filling out the paperwork she handed me slowly and carefully. My head was really aching.
A warm presence at my left made me glance up. Buck stood there, a blank look on his face.
“I’m fine,” I said, the words curt as they left my mouth.
“Your arms,” he said. I grimaced. I was smudging half-dried blood on the paperwork. “Let me do that,” he asked.
“No thanks, not to be fucking cliche, but you’ve… what’s the term? You’ve done enough,” I said, pulling away and turning my back on him, the clipboard in my shaking hands. Being so close to him, it was almost enough to undo me. There was something haunting in his eyes, begging me to forgive him without words.
No.
Stand firm, Mia. It’s just the blood-loss talking.
“Can we talk… After?” He pleaded. I didn’t want to look up into his blue eyes, and see the sadness in them. His voice ached with it. But that wasn’t fair to me. I wasn’t the one who’d fucked up. He was the one who’d made all the mistakes, not me. It was on him to wait for me to be ready.
“I saw you two,” I said, “I think you know what I saw.”
Buck swallowed, his throat bobbing when he did.
“It wasn’t what you think-”
“You don’t even know what I think,” I said. “Look, my head is killing me. Can we do this later?”
“Yeah,” he said, a shadow passing on his face. “I just… whatever you need.”
“Right now I need space,” I said, stepping away from him. I steeled myself for more puppy-dog looks from him, but they never came. Instead he nodded, slowly, his eyes softening, like he was calming himself down and not letting his need to talk to me overrule my need for immediate medical attention.
“I’m going to take Shawn home,” he said. I quirked an eyebrow at him and he winced.
“Whatever,” I said, lifting a hand. “Just go, and it’s fine.”
“No it’s not,” he said, “but I promise you, I’ll do whatever I can to make it fine.”
“I don’t think you can, honestly, and right now, I don’t want to think about the shit you’d have to do in order for me to be okay with what I saw.”
Our whisper-fight was drawing the attention of the receptionist and I felt uncomfortable at the way she stared at me. Buck followed my gaze to her and then cleared his throat.
“Right, well-” His hand hovered in the air, like he wanted to cup my cheek with it, bend down, and kiss me or something. I stepped back further, putting space between us. He needed to know, visually, viscerally, that I wasn’t going to give into him like that anymore.
That season of my life was over. If Buck and Shawn had only come into my life for a reason, it was to teach me to respect myself more.
The lesson stung. But I had to learn it. Shitty way to come around to that way of thinking, but still.
I handed in my paperwork.
“Please have a seat, Miss,” the receptionist said.
“Can she have some gauze, or something, for the bleeding?” Buck asked.
“She doesn’t need your help,” Colt said, stepping up between us, blocking Buck from looking at me. I tried not to stare over his shoulder to see what Buck thought of that development, and instead turned to take the nearest seat, falling into it with a thump.
When I lifted my head after a moment, I caught Shawn looking at me, his mouth sullen, his eyes dark. Did he expect me to go running to him? Probably not. He probably didn’t even want me to. Maybe he wats bitchy that Buck was worried about me. I glanced away, turning my head. I couldn’t look at him.
I did hear him curse though, softly, under his breath, and the doors opened as he went outside without a word.
“Go take your boyfriend back to your bachelor pad,” Colt taunted openly, and Buck growled in response.
“Fuck you, Lawson, you have no idea-”
“Boys!” The receptionist’s sharp voice had us all looking up. She stood behind her desk, glaring hard. “This is not Riverdale, and you are not a group of Netflix heroes fighting over a girl,” she snapped. “Anyone not injured, or related, get out,” she pointed to the door. Colt glared at Buck, who glared back at Colt. Cael just looked amused.
“We’ll wait outside,” he said, “her uncle will be here in a few minutes.” Cael lifted his fingers to wave at me, and then grabbed Buck by the shoulder, hard. Buck grunted and followed him out. Colt turned to me, his eyebrows in apology.
“I’m fine,” I said, sitting back in my seat. My arms ached fiercely, my head was starting to sparkle with pain and the lights were way too bright. I was pretty sure I was going to puke again, and seeing my… guys had hurt.
But I was fine. I had to be. I gave him a weak smile.
“Alright,” he said, “but I’m not going home until you get the all clear.”
“Sounds good to me,” I said, settling further into my chair and closing my eyes as he left the room. I didn’t want to need him nearby, but a small part of me was raw and open and felt like I should just give in and lean on Colt a little.
It couldn’t hurt to not close off my heart completely, right?
Three
“The boys have all gone home,” my uncle said as he leaned in the doorway. I glanced up at him from where the nurse was wrapping my arm. The verdict in: I was definitely concussed, and I’d sprained my wrist, not to mention I was going to be sporting some pretty exciting bruises all over my body to go along with the spray of deep scrapes on my arms and one shoulder.
It was probably a good thing was summer over. I didn’t think I’d be ready to go out in a tank top of a swimsuit for months. I wrinkled my nose at my own thoughts. When had I gotten so shallow?
“Does that hurt?” The nurse asked, as she paused from wrapping my arm.
“Uh, a little, but just normal-pain, not cause of you,” I said. My uncle gazed at me hard.
“Lawson was a little difficult to persuade. He wanted to stick around,” his voice was quiet. The nurse hid a smile.
“More than a few suitors. You didn’t look too flattered earlier,” she commented. I blushed and ducked my head. Did everyone have to have an opinion about my lust-life? It wasn’t fair to call it a love-life when I wasn’t even sure at that point what love really felt like.
“They’re pains in my ass,” I commented.
“Mia,” Uncle Matt raised his eyebrows as he scolded me. “Language.”
I groaned and tried not to roll my eyes. Rolling my eyes hurt. The nurse taped off the wrap on my arms.
“There we are, good to go,” she said. “You have your prescription for PT?”
“Right here,” Uncle Matt said, patting his pocket. The doctor had prescribed me twice weekly PT, which was going to suck especially without my bike to get there after class.
Too bad I no longer felt like I could ask Buck or Shawn for a lift. I winced as I got off the high stool I’d been sitting on while the nurse tended to my injuries.
“Take her home and get her ice-cream, Matt,” the nurse said, and I blinked, glancing at my uncle in shock.
“Ahh, Nancy,” he said, and when I stared at him, I noticed his… cheeks were pink. He was blushing! I looked back at the nurse, who had a sassy smile on her face. She winked at me.
“We went to school together. Your uncle was quite the lady’s man back in the day.”
He made a choking noise and I laughed.
“Are you serious?” I twisted to look at him. “You? You hate wo-”
He held up a finger and I fell quiet.
“Hush and respect your elders, brat,” he teased, and my heart lifted in my chest. It felt easy, to talk like that with him, like nothing mattered and nothing was serious. He held out an arm for me and I curled into his side, safe, and comfortable as he hugged me. “I promise I’ll take her for ice-cream.”
“Good,” Nancy the Gossipy Nurse said, winking at me again. “You tell me if he doesn’t and I’ll get after him.”
<
br /> “I hate living in a small town,” my uncle grumbled as we left the clinic.
“So, Nancy, huh?” I asked him as I went to the passenger door of his car. He pointed at me.
“Don’t, or you’ll be grounded after you’re done being brain-bruised.”
“Maaaaaaaaaatt,” I said, “was she your spring fling?”
“Mia?” Shawn stepped out of the shadows and I spun, feeling a rise of dizziness in me as I did. I grabbed onto the top of the car, swallowing.
“Riordan, I thought I told you to get your ass home,” my uncle said, irritation in his tone.
“I just needed a second,” Shawn said, looking at me, anxiety on his face. “Please, Mia.”
It was the moment. Did I crumple like wet paper and let Shawn tell me how he felt? Let him explain, in front of my uncle of all people, what he’d done and what it meant? What I meant to him, or didn’t?
Or did I stand strong?
“Look,” I said, trying not to grit my teeth.
“When Cael called, said you’d fallen, that you got hurt,” Shawn gulped for air mid-sentence, “Mia, I thought I was gonna have a heart attack.”
“Good,” I snapped. Behind me, my uncle made a snorting noise, and the car settled as he got inside, the door closing. I was glad he thought I didn’t need him to ‘handle’ the situation I had it on my own, and didn’t need anyone supporting me. I had my own back.
Shawn looked like I’d slapped him, and I didn’t even feel bad about it.
“Good, I’m glad you were sick over it. You know what made me fucking sick? Seeing you and Buck kiss,” my words were firm. Hurt flickered on Shawn’s face and I realized how he might’ve taken that. “I don’t think it’s wrong you like guys, Shawn. I think it’s wrong that you lead me on so you could get the guy you wanted.”
“That’s not,” Shawn said, his words starting and stopping. “I didn’t, it wasn’t supposed to… fuck!” He turned away, lifting a hand to his face where I couldn’t see. His shoulders were almost shaking before he turned back to me. “Look, Mia, I just… I want you to know that hurting you, I fucked up, you don’t know how I can’t even sleep over it.”
