Tearlach grinned. “Perhaps I shall take your midwife, provided we live to see the morrow. Let us see how well we fight together.”
Sarah cried out as Bella bolted down the path, racing straight into the approaching horses. “Bella, come!”
Barking filled the air and the galloping slowed. Bella came running back, barking and dancing in circles. All faced the trail and Sarah nearly lost her seat as the first man came into view.
“Holy crap,” Peter whispered just before he leapt from his mount. “You’re back. Thank God, you’re back.”
Evan jumped down before his horse had come to a complete stop; he pulled Peter close in a massive hug. Sarah counted twenty-plus Draig men and another dozen she didn’t recognize. When the Campbell men cheered, Tearlach hit the ground and ran to embrace a younger man with same fair coloring. Another dozen men ran from their hiding spots in the forest to welcome home presumed Campbell men.
With blurred vision, her dismount resembled more of a fall and her knees rested on the damp forest floor. Bella nuzzled her face and she pushed the dog away, only feeling her world fall away. Darkness filled her heart and cast shadows on the scene that would never equate to a happy homecoming. No-no-no-no. . .I can’t feel him. . .
Hands attempted to pull her to her feet, but she batted them away. Peter’s voice called to her and the hands on her face likely belonged to him. His voice repeated sounds that took long minutes to soak into her head.
“I swear to you that Conall is still alive. Can you hear me? Evan, get over here.”
No-no-no-no. . .
The mantra roared in her mind void of concrete thought. A raven-haired man bent to lock onto her gaze with eyes that made her think of emeralds dancing in the sunlight. Those are the wrong eyes.
The wrong man spoke, daring her to face a reality she had no interest in pursuing. “Do you have words of welcome for me?” His voice held no warmth, despite their previous conversations. A faint scar ran under his right cheekbone, marring his boyish persona. His gaze held only challenge and thinly veiled hostility. Or are my perceptions jaded due to the silence of my skin.
Somehow, she had taken steps toward the trail, steps she didn’t recall taking. Her feet left the growth to stand on packed earth and gravity tugged while heart cracked open. No tingles warmed her flesh; no sensation of Conall’s nearness to end her longing. Her mouth opened but no words were spoken. Then she felt an arm around her waist, preventing her slide to the ground.
“Conall is alive, Sarah. Do you hear me? I swear it. Tell her, Evan, before she passes out on me.” Peter’s demands floated around her until she again found the green eyes so similar to the ones she craved to behold, the ones present only in her dreams.
“Conall has been detained by the Bruce and sends his regrets he is unable to honor the missive you sent with him.” That Evan told her what she wanted to hear with no grin, made no difference to her.
I love you. Come home to me. Her farewell message wrapped in his saddlebags during what felt like ages ago. He’s alive. Dear Lord, he’s alive.
Forming the only questioned that mattered, she asked, “When?”
Evan shook his head. “I dinna ken. They had matters yet to be decided. But Conall tasked me with telling you he found your gift and treasures the fire you shared with him. He reads your words each day and returns them back to you.”
Only Conall would refer to a lock of my hair as fire and he could have just said I love you too. Lifting her hand to brush over the short strands from where she had cut months ago, a heavy sigh left her lips as the fog cleared from her mind. She noted the arrival of most of the men who had left to fight for the Bruce months ago. She heard Peter say that some men had stayed to serve at Conall’s side.
“Welcome home,” she offered, as reality became a disappointing but safe place to dwell. Hearty replies met her ears as she joined Bella in front of Evan. When she cupped his bearded face in her hands, she caught his flinch. Oh, this poor boy. What has he been through?
“I am so happy to see you home.” She grinned, but he just stared at her. I’ll need to find a way to reach him, but not today. Her hands fell away and relief glowed in his eyes. Concerns rose in her mind over traumas and mentally brutal events endured, and she stumbled as she stepped back.
“Just breathe, honey,” Peter crooned with his arm tight around her.
Evan scanned the scene. “What have we stumbled upon? Or did all seek to welcome us home?” Peter quickly filled in the details and the threats that currently seemed to be alleviated.
“Tearlach,” Evan called. “I have brought home all of your clansmen. No lives were lost, with thanks to Conall. He kept your men from the greatest danger.”
“For the day, we are at peace, Draig,” Tearlach replied as he continued to walk amongst his men.
“Then let’s stay that way,” Peter chimed in. “Allow us to send our best midwife to aid your wife.”
Tearlach spoke quietly with one of the men who had just returned. Nods were exchanged before the laird faced them. “I accept your offer. Send her with an escort. All will be treated as guests.”
Peter gave a quick command, sending three of their warriors to fetch Brenda. “I need your assurance of her safe return. Brenda is beyond valued.” He gave her a sideways glance. “We need her.”
Tearlach laughed. “So ‘tis the way of it. You will send me the woman who brings lairds into the world. You have my gratitude.” His gaze washed over her. “I will see her safely back to Draig lands for your sake as thanks for your kindness to my sister.”
All eyes focused on her and then on her belly. Wow, these men really hone in on subtle clues.
Evan stepped closer and stared at her belly that had popped toward the end of August. “So what Conall dared to dream is a truth. He would be pleased if he kenned the tidings.”
Somewhere in there, Sarah heard an insult but couldn’t quite detect where or how. It’s in his vocal tone, the mocking. Who am I kidding? I’m likely a wreck after the last half an hour and my adrenaline is crashing.
Peter turned and addressed the crowd of men. “Tearlach, Brenda will be here shortly to travel with you. Our thanks for treating her as a guest. We all know the oath that comes with such offers.”
“For the day, we will honor our peace.” Tearlach’s sideways acknowledgement let them all know more missing sheep were likely once the harvest was completed.
Peter called the Draig men and commanded them to head to home. Only Donald stayed after giving his vow to see his wife’s friend safely home.
“Come on, Evan. Let’s get you home,” Peter said with a laugh. “I doubt I’ve ever been so happy to see you.”
Sarah lifted the shirt to her nose and frowned. The garment no longer smelled of Conall, his scent only a memory. Scanning the chamber that had been theirs, his ghost lingered in shadows and haunted her thoughts and dreams. With a sigh, she sat up and stared at the empty side of the bed.
The knock at the door served as a reprieve from pretending she still slept, the day of rest imposed by Lena after she fawned over Evan and heard of the confrontation with Tearlach. Sarah had been told to spend the rest of yesterday, plus the morning, in bed after a solid tongue-lashing for facing danger.
The door opened and Peter stepped in, closing the door behind him. “Did I wake you? If I did, please don’t tell Lena.”
“I was up and there’s no way I’d put you in the doghouse with her. She’s quite feisty and bossy when she’s concerned. Lena’s already been here to enforce my being in bed until midday.” With an extra pout, she added, “And she stole Bella.” After shoving the shirt back under her pillow, she asked, “What’s up?”
“Bella is in the kennels, relax.” Peter beamed as he strode to the bed. “Riders just came in. Brenda worked her magic and there is a new Campbell heir, a boy.”
“And the mother?” Sarah questioned.
“All good, according to Donald. Brenda’s mandated she go back there tomorrow to ch
eck in on them both. We’re all too afraid of her to say no.” Peter laughed, his hearty cheer a solid sign the day was off to a good start.
Tension she hadn’t realized she carried fled instantly. “Outstanding news. Maybe this will help keep peace around for more than a day.”
“Maybe, maybe not.” Peter’s lips twitched in a conspirator’s grin. “But it should keep things at a low roar for some time. Tearlach owes us.”
Sarah scoffed and shook her head. “How about we think of it as doing the right thing, rather than a feat to be used for gain.”
Peter shrugged, “Fine, have it your way.” He glanced at the door and then gave her a wink. “Want me to sneak you outside?”
With a wide smile, Sarah left the bed and put both feet on a path to her clothing chest. “Hell, yes.”
Chapter 33
Sarah raised her hand to the men at the gates as she strode back within the security of the walls. With the sun beginning a descent into the sea, cooler air chilled her skin and she wished she had brought a plaid to keep her warm. October remained fickle, even in medieval Scotland. Warm one minute and cool the next.
Instead of following her to the door of the keep, Bella turned and headed for the stables. Neil stood at the entry and ushered Bella inside. Sarah called after the dog, “You do realize those are not your puppies, right?”
Only Neil responded. “I dinna think she cares, but I will keep an eye on her. Nessie enjoys her company. Bella will be sent home when I feed the dogs. There are some aspects of life Nessie will naught share.” With a wink and a warm grin, Neil returned to his kingdom.
Sarah sighed at the pseudo-abandonment and made her way to the study, hoping to speak with Evan. Her gait slowed as she wondered if he would speak with her. Since his return, Evan had been polite to her, but no more. The youthful exuberance had been replaced with a solemnity that bothered her. The doctor in her wanted to explore his mental state and help, but Evan only spoke openly with Peter, who then asked her for tools to help. Therapy via third party sucks. But I can’t fault Evan for preferring to speak with the man he sees as a substitute father. She remained grateful that Evan spoke with someone, rather than allowing his battle experience to fester.
The door stood open a crack and she rapped lightly before entering. Given Evan’s reputation with the ladies, she had no desire to catch him in the act. Then it dawned on her. He’s been a very good boy since his return. No one has joked or complained about his work ethic versus his pursuit of a raised skirt. I’ll have to ask Peter about that.
“Aye,” Evan responded as she entered. His head hung low as he went over the books that logged the harvest and the other that kept track of silver shipments.
“I was hoping to speak with you.” Instead of waiting for an invitation, Sarah took the chair opposite the desk. Even with the fire at her back, the room chilled with the breeze from the open window. Or is that coming from Evan?
Starting with a safe topic, she asked, “How are the books?” Since she had entered most of the data, she knew the state of affairs, but wanted his opinion.
Without glancing up, Evan said, “‘Twas a fine harvest even if nay as large as we’d hoped. The clan holds plenty of silver to purchase additional supplies if needed. Do I need to send out requests for masons?”
“I took care of that two days ago.” She didn’t remind him that he had been a part of the decision, or rather had listened as she and Peter conversed.
Only a few days after the bulk of the Draig men had returned, people she viewed as refugees had shown up at their gates. Evan had explained that Conall had told those who lost their homes due to the wars that they were welcome on his lands. To date, the clan had seventeen new members, hence the need for masons to build more cottages.
Maybe I should be grateful Peter is the one handling Evan. Given the influx of folks who lost their worlds, I’m back in private practice.
“Aye, I recall the conversation,” Evan mumbled, his lips twisting in distaste. “I forgot you kenned how to write.”
The disgust in his voice killed her last vestige of patience with Evan. For three weeks, she’d let him get away with snarky comments and hostile glances. She’d ignored her instincts that wanted to know why she was his personal devil. That stops now.
“What’s your problem with me?” Sitting straight in the chair, she held his gaze even as it shifted to raw anger.
Evan spit his venom. “You seem able to write for services needed for building homes for strangers, but failed to offer such simple comforts to your husband who fashed for you day and night. Mayhap the Bruce’s men were correct and all you seek is our power and wealth.”
Whoa. . . That’s cold.
On her feet to meet his accusation, Sarah placed her hands on the desk and leaned forward. “How dare you? Peter and I sent message after message, dozens of them, and we received nothing back. For months we had no idea if either of you lived or,” her voice choked out, “had died.” Tears gathered in her eyes and she didn’t have the fortitude to push them away after speaking death and Conall in the same breath.
Her hand slammed the wood. “Nothing, we heard nothing. We only heard about the victory at Bannockburn thanks to a spice trader. Either one of you could have written to us, but you didn’t, did you?”
Evan’s eyes widened as he sucked in a ragged breath. “You sent missives to us?”
“Hasn’t Peter asked you about the silent treatment yet? He’s supposed to question why you both ignored us.” Why Conall ignored my letters, notes that deteriorated into pleas over the silent months.
“Peter has nay asked.” Evan slumped in his chair. “Men of all ranks received word from their homes, nay us. Some mocked your silence and Conall’s choice in you.”
Sarah fell back into her chair. “Please tell me he didn’t listen to them.”
Evan’s head shook. “He shut them out, his face a hard door nay to be breached by foul tidings.” Blowing out a breath, Evan held her gaze with no residual animosity. “Then I would find him clutching your lock of hair. My brother would tell me to ignore men who valued naught but their own hides.”
Unchecked tears rolled down her cheeks. “Swear to me he didn’t grow to doubt me.”
He reached across the table to grip her hand that clung to the table’s edge. “We slept in abandoned cottages, barns and beneath the sky. Yet each night he would speak of his hopes you carried his child and that he would come home to your rounded belly. He spoke of his desire to return to you, to live as only a laird who served the clan and his wife.”
A choked sob left her throat. “Thank you.”
With a small snort, Evan stared at the wall behind her. “My brother is a quiet man and yet he shared those thoughts with me quite often.”
Sarah smiled despite the tears the continued to leak from her eyes. “Your brother isn’t the quiet man you think he is.” Her thoughts drifted to their many late-night conversations. “During our brief time together, he told me so much about himself, your family, and how much you all mean to him.”
Wide eyes met hers. “Truly? He said little and yet I would have had more from him.”
“Maybe he’s hesitant to share at first.” Sarah left out that from the first moment she’d met Conall, he had openly shared pieces with her, but she’d needed to encourage the rest. “He told me about the day, actually the night, you were born. How excited he and your sister were to welcome a new baby to the family.” She shared the details of two children pacing the hall, waiting for their father to bring the new life into the hall to be recognized by the clan, plus the added excitement of being allowed to stay up late.
Evan’s rapt attention drifted to wonderment. “I hardly kenned him when he left with my father all those years ago. While he trained to be laird and a warrior, I was playing in the fields and hiding from my tutors.” Evan chuckled at his memories.
“He spoke about that too.” In the chamber filled with harmony, Sarah shared what Conall had told her of his boyhood
life, his memories of Evan and their sister, Eleanor, and his stories of their parents. She ended her reminiscence with the singular fact, “He loves you very much.”
Evan rose and strode around the desk to kneel at her side. “Forgive me. I have been horrid to you since my return. I thought you held no affection for Conall, that he loved a woman who cared naught for him. Yet here you sit sharing his tales with me. I swear I hear his voice in your telling.”
“I understand,” Sarah whispered as she cupped his cheek, void of the beard. His features were so similar to Conall’s that her heart hurt taking him in.
“I will be the brother-by-marriage you deserve. I shall remain ever by your side and take care of your every need.” Gripping her hand, he shifted his head to kiss her palm.
When she inhaled sharply, Evan paled. “What ails you? Should I fetch Lena?”
Pulling her hand out of his, Sarah placed both on her baby bump. “You niece is making her presence known. I’ve felt small bubbles for a bit, but this was more of a squirm.” Sitting still, she waited for more, only to sigh in mild disappointment. “I think that was it.”
“A fine lass, aye?” Evan teased her.
Giving him a quick wink, she replied, “You’ll know when I do.”
With his gaze locked on her hands, he asked, “Do you have need of the midwife?”
Sarah laughed despite the mild panic in his voice. “I already have Lena following my every step, so relax. Everything with me is just fine. I’m just glad we talked and cleared up misconceptions.”
“As am I, Sarah.”
The odd fact remained that letters had never been received but notes from other areas had been. “How could every letter we sent have been lost? We never expected every one to reach you, but it’s weird, right?”
“Aye, ‘tis disturbing. ‘Tis enough to ken you tried, and Conall will feel the same when he is home. Forgive me that I dinna ken when he comes. Only ken he argues with the Bruce for release from duty.”
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