Dancing With Redemption (Barre To Bar Book 5)

by Summer Cooper

  “Thanks. Have fun.”

  Roxie waved and got out through the door as quickly as she could. Her small SUV started up right away, and she was at the nearest mall in less than ten minutes. It was wintertime and early in the morning still. Traffic was light and she was at the entrance to the mall, looking around trying to decide where to go first, now that she was free.

  That made her smile. Living with Lincoln wasn’t so bad, she was just feeling cloistered, and far too aroused to be in that house for one more second. The first thing she did was get some breakfast, giving in to the craving for a sausage biscuit that she washed down with some orange juice. Then she headed to a shop that was strictly for maternity clothes. She had a credit card with her that Lincoln had told her to use as she wished. And today, she wished for new dresses that weren’t too tight. There were a few tops she wanted as well, and then she found herself in the lingerie section of the shop. Looking around, Roxie found some maternity nightgowns and pajamas that were cute and suitable for most nights at home. But it was the black silk nightgown and lacy robe that went with it that drew her eyes over and over again.

  She decided to try one on, not because she had a plan or anything, but because for the first time in a long time, she wanted to feel sexy again. With the permission of a saleswoman, Roxie went into a booth to try the outfit on. The white cubicle had mirrors on all four sides, and Roxie had a good view from every angle, once she’d managed to get into the nightgown and robe.

  The nightgown was a basic slip shape with triangular cups at the top with underwires to support her heavy breasts. The material was gathered below her bust, with a lot of material to cover her belly. The lace robe was a perfect compliment that went down to her knees and sheer enough that nothing was left to the imagination.

  Lincoln’s jaw would hit the floor if she came out wearing this for dinner tonight, she thought with a smirk of delight. Not that she would do that, but if she did…

  Fantasies blossomed in her mind. Filthy, dirty fantasies that left her feeling flush. Getting out of the robe and gown quickly, Roxie dressed, exited the booth, and stared at the pile of clothes she’d left at the counter already. She’d intended to put the sexy lingerie back but found herself watching as the saleswoman folded it up and put it in a box.

  Then, she found herself paying for it all and leaving the store.

  She would not wear it, she kept telling herself, it was just there for those nights when she felt fat and ungainly. That was all.

  Roxie did a little more shopping, adding some shoes that felt alright on her toes to the pile of bags she already had, and a few gifts for Lily, Lincoln, and Aunt Katie for Christmas. When she left the store, she felt a little triumphant. For the longest time, she’d been afraid to go out on her own. Lincoln took her everywhere she needed to go so it hadn’t been an issue really. She hadn’t had to face that fear, not until being too close to him nearly drove her insane with need.

  Okay, so she hadn’t solved world hunger, and she hadn’t won a marathon, but this small victory was just that, a victory over her own fears. Now if only she could conquer this feeling that she’d been hypnotized by him every time she was near him, she might come out of this alright. Getting back in her car, she drove herself back to the house, only to find it empty.

  Lincoln had left a note saying he needed to go out but he’d be back shortly. Roxie took it as an opportunity to try her new clothes on properly. The dresses were fine, long-sleeved, gathered under the bust, the same pattern, just different colors with one black and the other emerald green. The tops fit fine and would be good for everyday wear. Roxie put them away, along with the pairs of boots and sneakers that she’d bought, leaving the bag with the nightgown in it. Roxie took the lid off the box and looked down at it with a smile.

  Lincoln was out, she was alone, why not?

  Roxie put the nightgown on first, comfortable because Lincoln kept the house warm. She adjusted the straps until everything was just right and then put the robe on. Looking at herself in the floor-length mirror, she decided to take the long blonde wig off and looked at her image. Even with the super-short hair, she didn’t look bad. Turning to the side to look at her profile, Roxie smiled again. Even with her belly poking out, she still didn’t look bad. Not bad at all.

  Her right hand moved from her belly up to her hair. She kind of liked the look, even if she hadn’t made the choice to cut it so short. The bruises under her eyes and the cuts on her lips were gone, all that remained now was a woman who’d been through hell but still stood on her own two feet.

  Going to the bed, Roxie sat down with her eyes still on the image in the mirror. She’d overcome everything that had been thrown her way. Her parents would be proud of her. Maybe she hadn’t ended up the kind of dancer they had hoped for, and she’d never been to Paris, but she had survived. She’d lived through all of it and that was enough.

  Going to New York on her own had been stupid, but in the end, Celeste had been dealt with, as had the two men who’d killed her parents. Because of her, Marie could now live in the open without fear of being killed by a woman who had it in for her. Because of her decision, she could live out in the open now.

  That was a new perspective on it all, one that brought tears to her eyes. She’d taken her fate in her own hands, and she’d nearly lost. For too long she’d sat in this house, second-guessing every decision that she had to make. She’d deferred to Lincoln, trusting him to make the decisions. Which wasn’t wrong, but she’d allowed herself to become…nothing. That wouldn’t work, not at all.

  Her pride came back to life as she looked at herself in the mirror, even with the tears streaming down her face. Or maybe because of the tears streaming down her face, she decided, getting up to look at herself more closely. She was used to living her life, telling people to fuck off if they didn’t like how she decided to live that life, and doing exactly as she damn well pleased.

  For a while, she’d allowed herself to lose sight of that, but now she saw that fire burning again in her eyes. She saw determination, which had been dormant for too long.

  “Are you alright, Roxie?” Lincoln’s voice came through the door just before he pushed it open.

  Roxie turned around, about to tell him not to come in, but it was too late. His jaw hung open and his eyes were moving up and down her, taking in the sight of her body. “Um, yeah, I’m fine.”

  “You are, indeed.” He didn’t look away, or turn around, he just openly stared with hungry eyes going over her again and again. He leaned into the doorway, his hands in the pockets of the charcoal gray trousers he had on. “You look very good, actually.”

  Roxie’s breath caught in her throat and she looked away. This hadn’t been part of the plan, but she wanted him. She’d always wanted him, even when she’d hated him as a teenager. “I’m sorry, I thought you’d be gone longer. I’ll change.”

  “No, don’t,” he said quickly, holding his hand out. “Please, don’t.”

  “But, Lincoln?” She made the two words a question. She wasn’t sure what she was asking, but he seemed to know.

  “Roxie, come here.” He twitched his hand, refusing to budge. He wanted her to come to him.

  Roxie stared at his hand, knowing she shouldn’t go near him, but she couldn’t say no. Not anymore. He was what she wanted, what she’d missed, what she needed, and she couldn’t deny it anymore. Her feet moved before she’d told them to, taking her to him.

  Warmth flowed from his hand and up her arm as she placed her hand in his. Blue eyes crashed into brown, and she forgot what she might have wanted to say. But Lincoln hadn’t.

  “It’s been too long, Roxie. I’ve wanted to tell you for weeks now that I made a mistake, that I’d been incredibly stupid. And honestly, I think I was stupid all those years ago when I left you in the hotel room alone. I should have stayed with you, I should have told you then that you were the only woman I’d ever love.”

  “What?” She asked, shocked at what he’d admitted.
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  “I’ve loved you since you were fourteen years old, Roxie. Remember that first time you told me to fuck off? You made me laugh but I also knew you meant it. You were so fierce, strong, sure of what you wanted.” He ran a finger down her cheek to her jaw, but his eyes stayed on hers. “And when I found you as an adult, this larger-than-life dancer with eyes full of fire and damnation, fuck, I didn’t think it was possible to love you more, but every single day, you prove me wrong.”

  “You love me, Lincoln?” Roxie could have rolled her eyes at the stupid question, but it wasn’t so stupid. She’d given him the biggest reason in the world to hate her. “But, I kept Lily from you.”

  “Yes, but you did it to protect her. I understand that now. You did what you thought was best when you were the one left to make huge decisions on your own. You didn’t do it to be malicious. I was a dick about it when I found out, and I’m sorry for that. I wish I could change it, but I can’t. I can only try to learn from that mistake and not repeat it. If you’ll let me, I’d like to spend the rest of my life proving to you how sorry I am, Roxie.” He paused, moved his hand to his pocket, and pulled out a ring that made her eyes nearly pop.

  “Lincoln?” Her brain was stuck on making her sound stupid, but she didn’t pull her hand back because she wanted this. She hadn’t realized how much she’d wanted this. “But we’re supposed to be the ones who snub their noses at convention.”

  “Fuck that. Fuck conventions, fuck what we’re supposed to be, Roxie. Let’s just be us, and do whatever the fuck we want to, shall we? And what I want, what I’d really love, is for you to be my wife.” His eyes pleaded for an answer.

  She moved her fingers, holding her ring finger up to him. She wanted to pull it back as soon as she saw her bare nail beds, but he clutched at her hand.

  “I need to hear you say it, Rox,” he said, holding the ring just out of reach of her finger.

  “Hear what, Lincoln?” Her eyes were on his again, full of tears. This wasn’t a dream. It was real. It was happening.

  “Say you’ll marry me. Say you forgive me. Say you love me.” His eyes implored her to do his bidding.

  18

  Roxie

  “Yes, I’ll marry you, Lincoln. Yes, I forgive you. But most of all? Yes, I do love you.” She sniffled on a sob, holding her other hand up to her mouth as he slid the giant diamond on her finger.

  She was in his arms the moment the ring was on, crushed against his chest as he made a sound above her that she could comprehend. It could have been relief, joy, she didn’t know but didn’t mind either way. She had what she hadn’t let herself dare to wish for. A promise from him that he’d always be hers.

  The walls crumbled down, the fear faded away, everything disappeared when Lincoln tilted her face up to his and kissed her with so much intensity, she thought she’d collapse.

  Roxie tore at the buttons of his shirt, finally settling for just ripping the panels apart when her fingers didn’t want to work. The tips were still sensitive to things like buttons and she was impatient. Desire had flared into bright burning life the second his lips touched hers and she didn’t want to wait to feel his bare chest or to slide her hands up to his shoulders.

  It didn’t matter anymore what had happened in the past, it was time for the new now. New memories, new moments, new hope.

  Lincoln lifted his mouth from hers and pulled back to look at her. “Are you sure?”

  “About marrying you? Definitely. About this? About touching you?” She paused, biting her lip as she slid her right hand up to cup his face. “I’ve never been more sure, Lincoln.”

  His breath hissed in between his teeth and his eyes went wide. “Good, because I don’t think I could have spent another night alone. I’ve missed you so much.”

  “I’ve needed that time alone, but I have to say, Lincoln. I’ve missed you terribly.” There was nothing between their chests now, except a scrap of silk that did little to hold back the heat coming off his skin.

  “Prove it,” he said with a teasing smirk. He pulled away from her, holding out his hand as he did so. “Prove to me how much you’ve missed me.”

  Roxie gave him the dirtiest smile she could muster and followed.

  Lincoln kicked off his shoes before he climbed into her bed and relaxed against her pillows. It wasn’t even lunchtime yet, but it didn’t matter to either of them as Roxie followed the man she’d loved, even when she didn’t know it was love that she felt for him. The new ring on her finger would take some getting used to, but she didn’t mind its presence when she climbed over him, settling on top of him, his hips pressed into hers.

  “Like this, Lincoln? Is this how you want me to prove it?” She asked, her right hand on his flat stomach. Her eyes traveled up the hard muscles in his abdomen and up to his eyes.

  “Just like that, darlin’,” he answered, his right hand coming up to her hip, to hold her in place while he thrust up into her. “Just like that.”

  Her thighs tensed around him as she pushed down against him, loving the familiar feel of him there. Where he’d always belonged.

  Roxie leaned forward, needing to feel Lincoln’s warmth. Her skin felt ice-cold against the fire in Lincoln’s skin. The contrast of sensitive, silky skin against the rough scrape of Lincoln’s open shirt distracted Roxie and for a breathtaking second, she felt completely overwhelmed. But it wasn’t a bad thing, Lincoln’s mouth consumed hers again, taking everything she dared to give.

  She was aware that his right hand moved, that it slid down the silky front panel of her gown, over the bulge of her stomach, and down, further, until she felt the tip of his finger sliding into her aching walls.

  “Lincoln,” Roxie breathed his name against his lips, pleasure making it hard to think beyond his name.

  “Just let me feel you, baby,” Lincoln murmured against her lips, his fingers tracing down her jaw when her head moved to the pillow, her lips opening to take his finger between her teeth.

  Roxie moaned around his finger, loving the images that popped into her head when she gently bit down on it and simply loving how good it felt to have something in her mouth as his fingers slid deeper inside of her, opening her for much more later. She made him moan when she sucked on the finger in her mouth, a promise of what could be if he wanted it.

  She nearly protested when he removed the finger between her teeth to slide it down to the curve of her breast. The tip of his index finger teased at the swell of her nipple, making her forget all about where that finger had been seconds before. Lincoln breathed a moan of delight when Roxie’s back arched, pushing her breast into his hand for more.

  “I want to touch your skin, but I love this material. It feels so nice, touching you through it.” Lincoln pushed her up gently, just enough to bring the globes up to his face.

  Roxie hovered over him, anticipating the sensation of his tongue touching her through the silk. The cloth turned cold as his tongue lapped at her nipple, wetting the black silk until it clung to the taut peak, a new sensation she hadn’t expected at all. Then his teeth locked gently around the bud just as his palm rocked into one of the most sensitive spots on her body.

  “Oh,” she breathed the sigh out long and deep, giving herself up to everything he made her feel.

  “You respond to the slightest touch. It’s always fascinated me, how receptive you are. I’ve watched you so many times, the way you touch yourself, watching how you like to be touched. I’ve watched you so often lately, wanting to touch you, but I knew I couldn’t.” His thumb and forefinger gripped at her nipple softly, teasing it until her hips ground down into him as he whispered the words to her, even though they were completely alone. Her eyes were caught by his, watching the way he watched her as he brought her body to life.

  “I keep thinking about the way your body moved when I touched you, the way your face would change when I made you come. I’ve missed the way your back arches when I slide into you. I’ve desperately missed being inside of you, fucking you as your body close
d around me, taking me deeper into you. Fuck, I’ve missed everything about you.”

  Holy moly, he was going to get her off before she even got his pants off, she thought, as his lips teased at her other nipple through her gown. She pressed her breast into his face, wanting more, loving the sensation of the silky swipe of his tongue through the cloth, but she wanted so much more.

  “Lincoln, give me more,” she pleaded, rocking her hips, pushing against Lincoln’s hand, clutching at his shoulders to support her torso as she focused on one thing: feeling the intense pleasure he was giving her.

  “Are you ready for me, Roxie? Or do you want me to finish you off like this?” He asked, focusing on her eyes as she stared down at him.

  She went still for a moment, thinking. She didn’t want to wait, but she also wanted him inside of her. And if he was inside of her, oh it would be so good.

  “Oh yes, fuck me, please. I need you inside of me more than I need anything else, right now.” She’d made them both wait far too long, and they might just combust once he was finally where he belonged, but she didn’t care. She wanted him and didn’t care what it cost them.

  Lincoln pushed at her with his hips until she figured out she needed to move. He couldn’t get his pants off with her on top of him.

  “Be careful,” Lincoln warned her as she moved off of him, supporting her as much as he could. Lincoln stood up, pushing his pants off and tearing his shirt away from his arms. He crawled back onto the bed, watching her like a lion watches a gazelle.

  “What?” She asked, confused by the way he was looking at her.

  “How is this going to be best for you?” He asked finally, still on his hands and knees.

  “Probably like that,” she answered, without thinking.

  “Taking it from behind always was one of your favorite positions,” Lincoln said with a cheeky grin.