Apostate

by Frankie Robertson

  “I told Ezra, remember? He didn’t believe me. It would have been better if Jasper had told him, but he didn’t and here we are.”

  “There’s no one else?”

  “Yes. I’ve had other partners through the millennia. They might listen. But finding and contacting them will take considerable time. We change bodies every lifetime and it’s not like we have a company directory. Our anonymity—even from each other—is part of what keeps us safe from discovery.”

  “So what’s the rush?”

  “Three could transition to a new body, or more likely, convince the Council I’ve gone rogue and send an Enforcer after me. If that happens, none of my former partners will help anyway. I really have no choice, chérie. I have to do this on my own, and I have to do it now.”

  “There’s no way to convince Ezra?”

  Kellan shook his head. “I could let him interview me. He wants to see if I’m as rogue as my deceased partner. If he examines my memory of what Jasper told me, he’ll find out that my partner was sharing a body with a human and that we both failed to execute Melchior and Athena, putting them at risk as well as myself. He could execute me on the spot and Three would never be stopped.”

  “Is Ezra that rigid? Or would he do what’s right?”

  “He believes the rules we live by have protected the safety of the U’dahmi for nearly five thousand years.”

  “And yet he allowed you to determine whether my mental defenses were adequate. That wasn’t exactly protocol, was it?”

  “Not precisely, but he verified your skill quite thoroughly afterward.” He rubbed his forehead. “There’s a big difference between bending the rules to protect the mind of a mortal, and sanctioning what most U’dahmi would consider the next thing to possession. Let alone participating in an assassination.”

  Tasha sighed and sat down next to Kellan again, taking his hand. **So get Jared to help you. Please. I don’t want you to die just because you’re being stubborn.**

  Kellan’s laugh had a cynical edge to it. **I don’t want to die either, if I can help it.** He stared at their clasped hands for a long moment, and Tasha wondered what new objection he would throw down next. But when he spoke he surprised her. **All right. I’ll talk to Jared. But we’ll need to make a stop on the way.**

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Tasha stared at the destruction of Kellan’s and Jasper’s office. They’d stopped at a small office complex in a Phoenix suburb to pick up something, but somebody had tossed the place. An empty space on the desk suggested the computer had been stolen, and the desk drawers had all been pulled out and upended, their contents spilled on the floor.

  “And I thought I was messy.” Kellan flicked her a wry smile and she shrugged. “Sorry. It was the best I could come up with on short notice.” She shook her head. “This is going to take a week to clean up.”

  “I’m not worried about that. I’m here for only one thing.”

  “What?”

  “Ada Lovelace.” He pointed at the bust of a woman lying on its side in the corner next to a bookcase. She had an old-fashioned hairstyle and a delicate dimpled chin but her straight nose had a chip missing. He scooped it up. “Behold, the only legitimate child of Lord Byron, and the writer of one of the first programs for Babbage’s Analytical Engine—a very early mechanical computer.”

  “I’ve never heard of her.”

  “Not a lot of people have. She lived in the mid-1800s. The Countess of Lovelace was an eclectic life-long student and a gifted mathematician.”

  “Did Lightbringers whisper in her ear?”

  Kellan laughed. “I don’t know. Maybe. But I think Ada’s mother did their work for them. She encouraged Ada to pursue her talent for mathematics.”

  He spoke with such admiration. “Did you know her?” Was she your lover?

  “I met her at a salon she and her husband hosted to honor Dickens. She’d probably be better known, and the world a different place, if Babbage hadn’t run short of funds.” He lifted his shoulder in a Gallic shrug. “History turns on little things.”

  And he would know. In school, Tasha had studied art history and the history of fashion design. Now she was curious about what Kellan had lived through. Not that she was planning a future with him. She was just interested.

  Kellan turned the wooden base clockwise until it came off. He plucked a small black thumb drive from a hidden compartment and slipped it into the inside pocket of his jacket.

  “What is that?”

  “What we came here for.”

  “And that is…?”

  Kellan hesitated, covering the pause by screwing Ada’s head back onto the base.

  Tasha pressed her lips together to keep the hurt inside. Whatever it was, he wasn’t going to tell her. It was just another demonstration of him shutting her out.

  She almost jumped when he said, “It’s Jasper’s file on Three. Tuck that knowledge away deep in the maze of your mind. No one can know it exists until we’re safe at Jared’s.”

  Who am I going to tell? But Kellan was so serious that Tasha just nodded, nonplussed by his sharing of information. “Thank you for telling me. I’ll be careful.”

  Kellan winced, but she wasn’t sure how to interpret his expression. “I know you will. We should go.”

  Ten minutes after they left the office Kellan said, “I’m pretty sure we’re being followed. The office was probably being watched.”

  “What are we going to do?”

  “Lose them, and then switch cars.”

  Phoenix traffic made evasive driving difficult. Tasha made friends with the “oh shit” handle as Kellan changed lanes, squeezed between cars, and ran two red lights. It was a miracle that the cops didn’t pull him over. Her heart was hammering by the time Kellan said, “We’re clear.”

  They left their rental in an underground parking garage and took a taxi to a different agency to rent an SUV.

  Tasha started to relax as they resumed driving southeast to Tucson until Kellan asked, “Would you call Jared and ask if he still wants us to come to his house?”

  “Why wouldn’t he? We shook the tail, didn’t we?”

  “We did. But Jared’s family is already known to the Golden Path and what you did in the parking lot with the asphalt probably renewed their attention. If that was who was tailing us, they don’t really need to follow us. They can guess we’re headed to either Jared’s or your sister’s house. We might be bringing trouble to their door.”

  “Since someone was following us, that argues against it being the Golden Path. It might be someone sent by Three—especially since Jasper just tried to kill him.”

  Kellan was silent for a moment. “Good point. But that’s even more reason to give Jared, and your sister for that matter, a chance to wave us off. They don’t need another powerful enemy knocking on their doors.”

  Tasha winced. He was right. Worse, Ana would welcome her even if the hounds of hell were on her heels. “Maybe we shouldn’t even ask. Either way, we could be bringing danger to them.”

  Kellan flexed his fingers on the steering wheel. “True, but as you said, I need Jared’s help. And all of them, Jared, Cassie, Ana, and Gideon are competent adults. Shouldn’t they know the score and make their own choices?”

  Stung, she glared at Kellan as he drove on, smoothly dodging RVs and eighteen-wheelers. The smug bastard had thrown her own argument back in her face. Did he think she’d capitulate and accept less because she wanted to protect her sister and their friends? No. He was right—they all deserved to make their own decisions and take their own risks.

  “Fine. I’ll call.”

  “Are you asking my husband to put his life on the line?” Cassie asked in a steely tone.

  “Cassie—” Jared said in a placating tone.

  “No.” Kellan cut him off, lifting both hands to ward off her ire. “I wouldn’t ask that of you.”

  Thanks to all the evasive maneuvers they’d had to take, it was late by the time they arrived at Jared’s a
nd Cassie’s home. Grace was in bed. The environment was less chaotic without a small tired child around. Adult conversation was easier but Kellan was perversely disappointed at not seeing the little girl. It had been several decades since he’d had children, and he missed them.

  “What he wants to do will be a setback for the Golden Path and the Apostates,” Jared pointed out, pulling Cassie close with an arm around her shoulder. “None of us wants the Veil to be opened to more like Aelziroth.” This was the real reason the Lightbringer hadn’t hesitated to invite them back. The short term risk justified a long term gain.

  Cassie blanched and swallowed hard. “Of course not.”

  “I don’t want you to participate in the actual assault. I just need some research and reconnaissance so I know what I’ll be walking into.”

  “What we’ll be walking into,” Tasha corrected him.

  Kellan opened his mouth to object but Cassie said, “I saw her with you—in the dark—standing at the edge of a forest.”

  Tasha turned a surprised expression on their hostess. “When did you see that?”

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep, but it came to me when we hugged at the door. But the future isn’t written in stone. You make your own choices.”

  “Can you tell us if we’ll succeed?” Tasha asked.

  “I just got a quick glimpse, but I can try for a more comprehensive vision later, if you want.”

  “Whatever you can tell us would be helpful,” Kellan said.

  Cassie laughed without much humor. “Wait until you hear my reading. You might not feel that way, then.”

  Jared lifted his head as if listening.

  “Someone just drove up,” Kellan said.

  “It’s probably Ana and Gideon,” Cassie said, heading for the door.

  “It sounds like their Camry,” Jared said, “but check the peephole.”

  Cassie rolled her eyes but also smiled as if this was a frequent exchange. “Always.”

  After the necessary hugs and handshaking, they returned to the topic at hand. “So how do I find this guy?” Jared asked while pouring wine for the newcomers. “If I’m going to use my network for surveillance, I’ll need more to go on than ‘Councilman Three.’”

  “I have more.” Kellan swallowed hard and reached into the inside pocket of his jacket. “Jasper had months to interpret this data to find Three. We don’t have that kind of time. I’m convinced that if we don’t stop him soon he’ll help to initiate another Celestial War. That’s more important than observing U’dahmi Law. Keeping our secrets won’t matter much then.”

  Gideon regarded him with sympathy. “You’re between Scylla and Charybdis, aren’t you? If the Veil is riven the U’dahmi won’t need to hide anymore, but they’ll be forced to choose a side—just what you tried to avoid in the first place. But if you succeed in preventing a Celestial War, they’ll revile you for revealing their secrets.”

  “That about sums it up. And it doesn’t matter. Mortals will die in a war not of their making if Three and the Golden Path have their way. I really don’t have a choice.”

  He looked at Tasha where she sat next to Ana. Her brow was furrowed with concern. It was just as well that she’d shut him down. Even success would mean they couldn’t be together. He’d be condemned as a rogue. He wouldn’t ask her to share a life on the run from U’dahmi Enforcers.

  He held up the flash drive between thumb and forefinger. “This drive has encrypted information that will help us locate Three.”

  Tasha went home with Ana and Gideon leaving Kellan to enjoy Cassie and Jared’s hospitality. She was grateful that Ana held off on the interrogation until the next morning. Gideon left on an errand for Jared, leaving Ana and Tasha alone to catch up. Ana was off work that day, so she talked for a while about reorganizing her life to include a husband along with her responsibility to her Circle. They’d pulled together after Warren’s betrayal, but it hadn’t been easy.

  For the first time in, well, ever, Tasha was interested in Ana’s pagan life. Ana cautiously shared her perspectives, clearly expecting Tasha to get angry or wave her hand dismissively before changing the subject as she did when they were younger.

  I suppose I deserve that. She’d closed herself off, rejecting their parents’ beliefs, and Ana’s, for years.

  Ana surprised her by abruptly changing the subject. “Enough about me. What’s going on between you and Kellan?”

  “Nothing.”

  Ana just raised an eyebrow, wordlessly conveying her skepticism so Tasha elaborated. “Nothing anymore. He wants to swaddle me like a baby. I want to be treated like an equal, or at least an apprentice, but he keeps shutting me out.”

  “Well, he is an old dog. It might take him a while to learn new tricks.”

  Tasha’s laugh sounded bitter to her own ears. “Don’t I know it. I thought you were annoying, always reminding me that you were older and had more experience. He’s a thousand times worse. He’s not a dick about it, he just mentions the occasional detail about a previous life here and there. I can never forget he’s lived a hundred lives to my sliver of one.”

  “Would you want him to censor himself and never mention his past lives?”

  “No! That would be shutting me out even more. I know I’m not being fair about this, but how can I ever be his equal?”

  “You can’t. I can’t be Gideon’s equal. Cassie isn’t Jared’s. But we each bring our own strengths to the relationship and we respect and love each other for who we are. That’s all any of us can ever do.” Ana got up and poured them both more coffee. “Mom had more education than Dad did, and earned more money, but they made it work.”

  “I’d forgotten that.”

  “Does he love you?”

  “He hasn’t said it out loud, but when we touch I can feel it.”

  “Then count your blessings, and be patient with him. You may not be his equal in experience, but you can be your best self.”

  “Yes, Ana,” Tasha said in a sing-song tone.

  Ana laughed. “Have patience with me, too. My big-sister hat is nailed to my head, you know. It doesn’t come off.”

  Tasha’s cell rang and she reached for it, hoping it wasn’t Kellan. Perversely, she was still disappointed when she saw it was Cassie.

  “Grace is down for a nap. If you’d still like me to do a reading for you, now would be a good time.”

  Julie’s land-line rang. Dave was surprised she still had one, but she’d said it made her feel safer. Caller ID said the caller was unknown. Probably a telemarketer, but Dave picked up anyway. The person on the other end was silent for a moment after he said hello, but it didn’t sound like a call center or like a computer was transferring him. Finally a man’s voice said, “Uh, hello? Can I speak to Julie?”

  “Who is this?”

  “Is this Julie’s brother?”

  Insight struck. “Chad? I told you to leave town.”

  “I did! Can I talk to her?”

  “No.” Dave clamped down on his anger. Chad’s stupidity had turned Julie’s life upside down and gotten Jack shot. Dave almost wished the dickhead was here in Julie’s living room so he could strangle the sonofabitch.

  “Is she all right?”

  “Your thug buddies shot up the hotel room she was in, does that sound all right?”

  “Oh my God! Is she okay? Is she dead?”

  Dave clenched his fist. He so wished he could rip this moron’s lungs out. He opened his mouth, ready to verbally eviscerate the douchebag, but then he paused. The guy sounded genuinely distraught. And he hadn’t actually killed anyone, at least not as far as Dave knew. That was more than Dave could claim.

  “She wasn’t hurt.”

  “Oh, thank God! Tell her I’m sorry I put her in this position. Of course, if she hadn’t thrown me out, and her brat hadn’t stolen my money, none of that would have happened.”

  The handset creaked as Dave’s fingers tightened and his throat clenched on a bellow of rage. He forced himself to relax,
flexing his fingers and taking a deep breath as Chad continued, “I—I’m going to tell The Lion that I’m the one who took his money. Then he’ll leave her alone.”

  “No!” Fear shot through Dave like lightning, shocking him out of his anger. Chad’s reappearance would shake up The Lion’s memories and all of Kellan’s work would be undone. “That won’t help her now. Stay put and keep your head down. The Lion got his money back. He’s lost interest in her, and you, too, for that matter. Let’s keep it that way. If you really want to make amends, turn yourself around and keep your nose clean.”

  “Will you tell her I called?”

  Hell no. But that wasn’t the answer that would assuage Chad’s guilt and keep him from calling her again. “Sure. But don’t try to contact her again. She’s not happy with you—and neither am I. Move on.”

  Dave hung up and looked at the clock. Damn. He was late to go next door to rake up Mrs.Perada’s leaves. She’d promised to bake snickerdoodles.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Tasha sat in Cassie’s cozy reading room, her hand between the other woman’s. If she ever had her own place again, she wanted to create a space in it as warm and welcoming as this. Cassie’s brow furrowed, and then she released Tasha’s hand.

  “You were in the dark again, standing in a doorway, but this time you weren’t alone.”

  “Kellan?”

  “No. He was near, but this was someone else. I couldn’t see clearly. I don’t think I’ve ever met this person because I couldn’t get a sense of him or her. You were frightened. Danger threatened from multiple directions.” Cassie leaned back in her chair. “I’m afraid that’s all I saw. Does it make sense to you?”

  “A little bit. Are you sure this is a vision of the future?”

  “Not completely. It felt like the future, but it might not be. Did I describe something you’ve already experienced?”