Love Notes (Friends Lovers or Nothing Book 4)

by Chanel, Jackie

  Me: And did you even hear me when I said I don’t care. You worry too much about what other people think. All that matters is me and you. That’s it.

  Sunny: You just don’t get it.

  Me: No!!!! You don’t get it & I’m not arguing w/ u by text. U got somethin u wanna get off ur chest...u kno where I’ll be

  “This fuckin’ girl,” I grumbled and sat my phone on the table.

  “My niece givin’ you a hard time about that blog mess?”

  Joey was sitting across from me while Summer and I devoured stacks of blueberry pancakes and bacon. He’d flown in from LA to perform with us tonight.

  “Yeah, but that’s not important. Finish telling me about that group.”

  Joey’s been picking up my slack as A&R at the label while I’m out on the road making us a shitload of money. Clausen Music Group is growing faster than either one of us expected. What started out as me, him, and two other artists has grown bigger than we ever imagined. Now we have eight artists. Joey started CMG as an independent label but since I gave up a potentially multi-million dollar re-signing deal with Power Records and signed with CMG, we’ve obtained major label distribution through Sony.

  I’ll say it again; leaving Power was the best career move of my life. Joey believed in my music the way Dre never did. Dre looked at me and saw dollar signs. I was a white boy who played the guitar in his book. I was Power’s Chris Martin, John Mayer, and Adam Levine. Joey saw my passion and my talent. He wanted me to keep playing the blues. With Joey’s help, my music changed from straight blues to blues mixed with rock, pop, and R&B like Hendrix and Clapton. He’s the best producer I’ve ever worked with and he taught me everything he knows. Therefore, if he thinks that rejuvenating the careers of two R&B singers will be a good move for CMG, then I’m definitely on board.

  “I’m thinking of putting them in the studio with Dreamz in a few weeks. If you have a free day, you should go to Atlanta and link up with them.”

  “Last I heard, Dreamz left Atlanta. He’s in NY now. But yeah, that would be a good sound. I’ll try to link up with him before Times Three goes out on tour.”

  “Roxy said she’s tryin’ to get Times Three to open the winter leg of your tour. What you think about that?”

  “Roxy is nuts,” I laughed. “Ambitiously nuts. Times Three? That’s like askin’ Jodeci to open for Nirvana back in the day. That’s not about to happen.”

  “It’s a black/white thing then? You know Franti opened for Mayer back in 2010.”

  “So,” I shrugged. “How many black people listen to Franti? Opening for Mayer was the right move for him. They share the same fan base.”

  “You got black fans.”

  “Not enough for Times Three to be my opening act. Maybe a co-headliner but that’s about it.”

  Joey got quiet and that far-off look he gets when he’s thinking about something important came over his face. He began to nod slowly.

  “Not a bad idea, Aiden. Maybe we should do a winter showcase, a Rhythm and Blues showcase of some sorts. We can line up some more big names...me, you, Times Three, Madison Charles, maybe that dude Cash Myers. Then some smaller acts. Erica, Fat Cat and Roy some more groups from New Orleans. Maybe we do about ten shows in major cities. Man, people would easily pay $250 a pop for that line-up.”

  “So, no winter tour?” I asked, a little disappointed. I like touring in the winter.

  “It would be better for the label to have both of us around for awhile. Erica needs to be back in the studio and playing her own shows. We’ve got seven more acts that need our attention. We can’t put all of our time and money into your projects and everyone gets put on the backburner. You asked for the partnership. This is what running a record company entails.” He smiled at Summer. “Tell your daddy he’s got to get his shit together.”

  “Daddy-”

  I stopped her. “Don’t. You’re not allowed to say shit.”

  “So, what’s up with that kid from Detroit?” Joey asked. “Kameron?”

  “He’s good. He hits me up practically every day. His mom is looking for a new guitar teacher. I’m going to pay for his lessons. When he turns eighteen, we’re definitely going to sign him.”

  Joey was quiet for a bit, so Summer filled the silence with all her requests for things to do today. Swim in the pool was mentioned at least three times. I promised to take her after soundcheck.

  “Aiden, I gotta say this,” Joey finally started talking after a good ten minutes of Summer’s chatter.

  His voice was low and authoritative. An immediate sense of apprehension overcame me. I owe this man, more than anyone else, for my career. He gave me my first real chance then made sure he helped in every other aspect as well. Whatever Joey had to say is important.

  “Say it.”

  “I see a lot of change in you as an artist and as a man since that first time I met you. I haven’t ever doubted your talent. Your music and being this girl’s father are the two things you know you’ve perfected.”

  Without saying anything more than thanks, I appreciated the vote of confidence from my mentor and friend. There was something else on his mind though because Joey rarely feeds my ego.

  “Seems like you get everything you want now, kid. But let me say this,” Joey continued. “You don’t need to change who you are for anybody. I love my niece but I also know her very well. She has a certain type and you ain’t it. But she will try to make you be that type of dude. She will try to turn you into a Tristan or Xavier or the type of dude who caters to her every need while she does little to nothing to reciprocate. Sunny’s a good girl but she’s selfish and needs a reality check. You can be the one for her but I already see changes in you that I don’t like.”

  “How’s that?”

  “You’re not focused. Your attention is on her and making sure she’s good when she’s here and stressing when she’s not. She’s got you trying to find babysitters and entertain the kid while she’s traveling all over the country. She has you convinced that having your kid here on tour is better than her staying with either of your parents like this isn’t your goddamn job. Plus, I heard that you are still thinking about the BMTV and VH-1 gigs because they want an all-access pass and Sunny doesn’t want people in her business. You’re giving her too much influence over your business and I’m surprised by that...and a little disappointed. Sunny doesn’t let you affect her business so why are you letting her affect yours?”

  Joey’s opinion hit me hard and definitely game me something to think about. What he pointed out isn’t new information or things that I didn’t know about Sunny. No one needs to read me a list of Sunny’s flaws. I know exactly how she is. One of the things that kept us apart is that fact that I will never be that normal guy she wants. I will never have a regular job. Also, she still has that only child mentality. No matter what Joey or my friends say, there has to be some changes made if I want to keep my girl and become the family that we should be.

  I’m not pussy-whipped. If Sunny really loves me, I expect her to put in as much effort as I do. If not, I can walk away. It’ll be hard but not impossible. We both have done it before.

  Chapter 12: Chicago

  “Oh my God, Phil! Isn’t that Aiden Tyler? What is he doing in Target? Do you think he remembers us?”

  The woman’s voice that broke up the quietness in the aisles of Target was familiar. At the mention of my name, Summer and I looked around the kids clothing section where she was filling up our cart with a solid mix of Captain America and Minions gear. I noticed the couple quickly approaching us and had to do a double take. The bottle-blonde woman was the exact same age as my mother but looked like she had Mom by at least ten years. She was wearing a pair of yoga pants and a halter that exposed tanned leathery skin, fake boobs, and her six-pack. It was clear that the Mt. Vernon High School cheerleading coach was still trying to look like the girls she coached, even after all these years.

  Beside her was a man that I would have recognized anywhere. Coach Wi
lliams, my dad’s best friend and my football coach from age six until I retired my cleats. The last time I’d seen Coach Williams was a quick glimpse at my dad’s funeral. I didn’t talk to him. I wasn’t trying to be rude but I didn’t talk to anyone. I have no hard feelings towards my former coach though.

  “Aiden Tyler!” Coach’s voice boomed, catching the attention of a couple of mothers in the kids’ section. “Well, I’ll be! Boy, we haven’t seen you around here in a month of Sundays!”

  “Hey, Coach,” I grinned. I hoisted Summer up on my shoulders and walked over to the Williams. “How you been?”

  “I’ve been well. How are you doing? How are you holding up?”

  “I’m okay now. I’m adjusting, I guess.”

  “How are your sisters and mother doing?”

  “Mom isn’t doing so great but Sara’s having a baby soon so that should help. Delilah’s okay too.”

  “That’s good to hear. You tell Dina that if she needs anything, don’t hesitate to ask.”

  “Sure thing. You’re lookin’ good, Coach. Still at Mt. Vernon High?”

  “Sure am. I get a new crop of hard heads like you every few years or so. We went to the state championship game a couple of years back. Looks like we might have a chance again next season.”

  I nodded, anxious to finish this conversation and finish shopping so Summer and I could get out of Target before Coach said my name again and caused a riot.

  “What you doin’ in Chicago, Coach?” I asked.

  He chuckled. “You’re not going to believe this but, Jordan Collins, you remember him, dontcha? Played receiver with you? Well, he got married yesterday and some of us stayed up here to catch your show. Everybody back home is so proud of you, son. You’ve made quite a name for yourself. Doug was really proud of you too. Before he passed, he had nothing but good to say about you.”

  “Yeah, well,” I mumbled.

  I didn’t want to get emotional in the middle of the Captain America t-shirts in Target but his words brought me right back to that place I didn’t want to be, Mt. Vernon, the night of my dad’s funeral and that goddamn letter.

  Dear Aiden,

  I remember the day the doctor told us that we were having a boy. It was the happiest moment of my life. A son who I could teach to run and play catch with. A son to carry on my name. A brother for Sara. Any man who ever has children wishes for a son.

  You didn’t want to be born and gave your mother hell. I should have guessed that rebelliousness would be in your nature. Every moment that I spent with you will forever be etched in my memory. Did you know your first word was Dad?

  Things changed as you grew up. We’ve had our fights, our differences, but I never gave up on you. I never stopped loving you. You’re my only son. Thank you for being such a great brother to your sisters, for always taking care of and protecting the women in our lives, like the precious jewels that they are.

  When I am gone, you will take my place as the man of the family. I trust that you will do that with honor and love. I know you will continue to take care of your mother and sisters.

  You are my son and I love you. I wish I had been kinder and more understanding to you. I wish I had the time to completely change things between us. From a distance, I watched you become everything that you wanted to be, everything you were destined to be. You are my hero, Aiden. You’re everything that I tried to be. I couldn’t have asked for anything more in a son. Our disagreements, our fights, our bouts of no communication, each one increased the respect and love I have for you, my only son.

  I wish I could see what kind of father you will become. When that time comes, promise me you won’t make the same mistakes with your child that I did with you. I waited until it was too late to say I’m proud of you.

  Son, I love you. You are my pride and joy. I wish I were there to tell it to you now. I hope that you find the love of a good woman, like I have with your mother, and know the joys of having children of your own. I hope you take the time to teach them everything that I failed to teach you. I know this is going to be hard, but if I can give you one piece of advice, it will be to keep reaching for the stars. I will be watching.

  I love you, Aiden.

  Dad

  I remember every single word of that letter. Those words rip at my heart every day. I can’t believe he’s gone. I can’t believe it’s been two years since he passed.

  Coach Williams clapped his hand on my shoulder. “You know the type of man your father was. He was a proud man, a stern man, but he was proud of you and he loved you. You hold on to that, alright?”

  “Yes sir.”

  “Oh my goodness!” Mrs. Williams squawked, breaking the emotional tension in the air. “Is this your little girl? What a beautiful child! She looks just like you!”

  “Thank you,” Summer answered before I could. “I’m Summer. I’m four.”

  “Well, Summer, it’s a pleasure to meet you. And you certainly have a beautiful name. I’m Carol. I’m friends with your grandmother.”

  “Hi, Miss Carol.”

  We spent a few more minutes catching up before I promised Coach that I’d come through Mt. Vernon before we left the state and see the new squad in action. Coach Williams’ football program is one of the most successful in the country and breeds professional and high ranked college athletes every year. That’s because he works his players like crazy. His teams don’t really get a summer break; it seems like he starts pre-camp conditioning right after school lets out for the summer. His program is not for someone who doesn’t live and breathe football, which is why I quit.

  I’m not excited about the promise I made. I don’t really want to go to Mt. Vernon but I will. No matter what, that’s where my parents raised me and my sisters. It’s home and my daughter has never stepped foot in the quiet suburban town her father wrecked havoc in. I should change that.

  ***

  My band was already at Allstate Arena when security escorted me, Fat Cat, and Roy through the crowd of people gathered around the back of the arena to get a glimpse of us. Although Fat Cat and Roy are New Orleans blues artists, they always come to Chicago with me. Chicago blues fans adore them. When they play with me, our shows sell out in minutes.

  Once backstage, I headed straight to my dressing room while Fat Cat and Roy went off to find Joey. A local band was already on stage doing a thirty-minute set before my opening act came on.

  I wasn’t expecting to see Sunny rifling through my wardrobe cases again when I walked into my dressing room but there she was. I wasn’t expecting anyone to be there. Usually, after my Meet & Greet, everyone leaves me alone. They think I have to mentally prepare to go out on stage and face my fans, like meditate or something. In reality, I’m usually just in here sleeping or playing video games. I don’t have to prep myself to play anymore. I don’t even get dressed until someone gives me a fifteen-minute warning.

  “What are you doing in here?” I asked Sunny. “I thought you were in Cleveland with LeBron’s wife.”

  “I was in Philly with Damon’s wife and you asked me to be at your shows.” She stopped going through my clothes and turned around. “ So here I am.”

  “You say that like it’s a chore.”

  “No I didn’t. But you’re not the only person who needs me.”

  “If you didn’t think you were going to be able to make it, you could have just said so. I’d rather have you working with Leilani than in here violating my personal space if you don’t want to be here.”

  Sunny slipped her arms around my waist and bit her bottom lip in that sexy way she knows drives me nuts.

  “Why the attitude? I wouldn’t mind so much if you violated my personal space.”

  “You always have sex on the brain, ol’ insatiable ass.”

  Grinning like she was unwrapping a birthday gift, Sunny began unfastening my belt then slipped her small but nimble hands down my jeans and rubbed along the crotch of my boxers. Aiden Jr. responded as it should have.

  “Take it
as a compliment. If you weren’t any good, I wouldn’t keep coming back for more. Besides, I’m your stylist, baby.” She looked up me with a devious twinkle in her eye. “Gotta get you out of these clothes and into your performance outfit. Unless you want me to call Shane at the hotel and have his lazy ass come over here. I don’t know why you hired him anyway. He’s not as good as me and-”

  I silenced her anti-Shane rant by kissing her deep and hard. Sunny’s presence was just the distraction I needed from the memories flooding my head. Even though she didn’t want to be here, at this moment, I needed her.

  Her mouth was soft as velvet and the taste of the Extra spearmint gum that she chews daily still lingered. Sunny eased into my body and pressed against me firmly. Reaching behind her, I untied the straps around her neck and let the top she was wearing fall around her waist. She moaned against my lips as I liberated her breasts from Victoria’s strapless prison. Sunny quickly pulled her capri pants off and threw her shirt to the ground.

  “Put your clothes back on,” I laughed. “We are not having sex in my dressing room again. You’re gonna have to wait.”

  “Why’d you untie my shirt then?” Sunny pouted.

  “Because I wanted to see your boobs. It’s been a minute.”

  “You are such an ass,” she grumbled while sliding her pants back on. I just laughed and walked over to the sofa. I picked up my cell and looked to see if my mother had replied to my text.

  Mom: What were you doing in Target? Did you know there are already pictures of you and Summer on the Internet? And next time, don’t forget to ask about your very pregnant sister when you text me. You need to call both of them. You can’t be on the road for weeks and not call us, Aiden.

  My initial text was an invitation for her to come up here when Sunny, Summer, and I go to Mt. Vernon. I don’t know how she got so off topic. Texting was a bad idea so I dialed her number and waited for her to pick up.

  “Mom, how’s Sara?” I asked as soon as she answered.