My Vows Are Sealed (Sealed With a Kiss)

by Carmen Richter

  “Give her a minute, sweetheart.” Ashton somehow managed to carry all three mugs of coffee into the living room and set them on the coffee table, then grabbed a Ziplock bag of cookies out of Kate’s bag, sat on my other side, and hugged the arm that was closest to them. “Just let her breathe.”

  “No, it’s okay. It’ll just be harder the longer I wait,” I sniffled as I grabbed a cookie out of the bag and started to nibble at it.

  I took a shaky breath and started talking. It was a little easier to talk about with them than it was with Brendan. Even though he was the only one I’d wanted last night and I’d known I had to tell him about this, talking to him about what my father had done was still one of the hardest things I’d ever had to do. But at least, unlike Brendan, these two never had the potential of seeing me naked. That made it a little less awkward.

  “Can I kill him? Please?” Ashton asked when I was done talking.

  “I can’t afford to bail you out of jail, Ash,” Kate chuckled humorlessly. “And besides, the borderline incestuous psycho is the one who belongs in jail, not you. Which brings me to my question. Will you please let us help you report this to the police, Darla?”

  “And tell them what?” I wiped my tears away. “He didn’t hurt me. I’ve never been that scared of him before, but I don’t have a single mark to show for it. And even if he did give my mom a black eye when he hit her, she’d never admit that he was the one who caused her injuries. She’s too dependent on him. She basically told me to stay away from the house because she knows it’s not safe for me to go back there. So I know she’d tell the cops I made it all up and she just tripped and fell or something. I’m just staying here until Brendan and I can figure out what to do.”

  “Honey, I hate to point this out, but you can’t shack up with your man forever,” Ashton sighed. “Your dad might not know that you and Brendan are a couple, but he knows you guys are friends. This is going to be one of the first places he looks. I’d say you can come home with me, but we don’t have the space.”

  “You’re coming home with me,” Kate said, like it was a done deal. “We’ve got a spare bedroom that’s going unused, and my mom doesn’t know a lot about your home life, but she knows enough that she’ll be willing to help you. It’s completely up to you how much you tell her.”

  “She’s never even met me,” I sniffled. “I can’t ask to crash in her spare bedroom for three months when she’s never met me before.”

  “She loves you already, just because she knows how important you are to me,” she insisted. “I’m not taking no for an answer, hon.”

  Why did my heart squeeze a little at the thought of leaving this apartment? At the thought of going to sleep without my boyfriend next to me tonight? He’d been my rock yesterday, and now I had to leave him. I knew it was for the best, and I’d known all along that I couldn’t stay at this apartment forever, but it didn’t make it any easier.

  “Is it stupid that I’m scared of what I’ll see if I close my eyes and Brendan’s not holding me?” I asked, feeling myself flush a little.

  “Oh, honey,” Ashton murmured, pulling me back into a hug. “No, it’s not stupid. Wait. You actually slept in the same bed last night? He didn’t take the couch?”

  I couldn’t help it. I turned the color of a lobster as I thought about what else we’d done in that bed.

  I wasn’t like Kate and Naomi. They’d both had no problem telling me about their first times, and I’d been happy for them and listened to them gush, but to me, it was private. The things that I’d shared with Brendan last night were between the two of us and no one else.

  But apparently my embarrassment was the only clue these two needed to figure it out all on their own.

  “No!” Ashton gasped. “You did more than sleep in that bed, didn’t you?”

  “Oh, my God,” Kate laughed. “I thought we were friends, Darla. You’re supposed to tell us these things!”

  “Last night was the first time,” I mumbled.

  “Aww! Katie, our sweet, innocent little girl’s all grown up,” Ashton sniffed dramatically, wiping a fake tear out of their eye. “I’m so proud.”

  I threw one of the pillows from the couch at them. “You’re ridiculous.”

  “Please tell me you remembered to pee afterward,” Kate said.

  Ashton and I both turned to look at her like she had three heads.

  “Really, dollface? That’s what you want to know?” they teased. “I didn’t realize you had a piss fetish.”

  That did it. I lost it, dissolving in a fit of giggles. Leave it to these two to know how to make me laugh at a time like this.

  “Hey, friends don’t let friends get the UTI from Hell after their first time,” Kate huffed, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms over her chest. “They make sure their friends don’t make the same mistakes.”

  “Yes, I remembered to pee. Not immediately, but within like maybe fifteen minutes,” I chuckled awkwardly.

  “That’s acceptable,” she chuckled too. “So, do we get any details?”

  Well, if nothing else, talking about the one good thing to come out of last night was distracting me. I guessed giving them a few details could hurt anything.

  “I mean, it was kind of awkward because neither one of us really knew what we were doing. But he was so sweet, and in its own weird way, it was the most romantic night of my life,” I admitted.

  “What made you change your mind? You were pretty dead set on waiting until you were married,” Ashton asked.

  “I don’t know,” I sighed, downing the last of my coffee. “I just…last night, the only time I wasn’t falling apart was when he was holding me. Like, all I wanted in the whole world was to be as close to him as I could get. I guess it just made me realize that signing a stupid piece of paper didn’t mean anything. He’s my soulmate, and he’s my rock. Nothing’s going to change that. And that’s why I’m scared of leaving here, even though I know it’s stupid to stay. I’m not strong enough to do this by myself.”

  I tried to fight the fresh round of tears I felt stinging my eyes, but I wasn’t entirely successful. I took a deep breath as I wiped the drops that had managed to leak out off of my cheeks.

  “Darla, you’re one of the strongest people I know,” Kate murmured. “As much as I wish you’d go to the cops, I get why you can’t, and doing what you’re doing is brave too. But you don’t have to do this alone. You’ve got me and Ash and Brendan, and Nay and Alex too once you tell them about this. Let us help you. Admitting that you can’t do everything by yourself isn’t showing weakness. It’s being human.”

  I leaned my head on her shoulder, and she grabbed the bag of cookies and handed me another one.

  “Here. Snickerdoodles make everything better,” she chuckled.

  I smiled. “I don’t know what I’m going to do when you guys move to New York for college in the fall.”

  “Aww, honey,” Ashton cooed. “You’re always going to be our sister from another mister, no matter how many miles there are between us. And you better not let anyone else be the person of honor at your and Brendan’s wedding.”

  “Hey! We’re co-person-of-honoring it, asshole,” Kate teased.

  “I wouldn’t dream of getting married without the two of you there,” I promised. “Hopefully it can happen before you have to move.”

  The key turned in the door lock, and a glance at the clock told me that it was already past noon. When the door opened, a three-and-a-half-foot bundle of energy zoomed over to me and threw himself into my arms. I gasped and choked on a sob as I looked down at my favorite kid.

  “Hey, little man,” I sniffled. “I missed you this morning.”

  “I missed you too,” Nathan mumbled as he sat down on my knees. “Brendan said you’re not coming to church for a while.”

  Wow. He had to have been able to tell that I wasn’t in a good place right now, because he hadn’t given me hell for calling him “little man.” I knew he was outgrowing that nickname, but I co
uldn’t help it. I’d been calling him that ever since he was born. It was a hard habit to break.

  “Yeah, I have to take a break from church for a little while,” I sighed. “I’m going to miss you.”

  Brendan chuckled weakly as he kissed the top of my head. Then he moved our coffee mugs and sat down across from me on the coffee table.

  “You two are still going to see each other. I’ll make sure of it. He’s your family, and you need your family.”

  That made me smile, because he was right. It didn’t matter if I didn’t share DNA with Nathan. He was my baby brother just as much as he was Brendan’s.

  “Aww,” Kate gushed. “You guys are seriously adorable together. You and Nate, I mean. And speaking of, it’s been way too long since we’ve gotten to hang out, Nate.”

  “Yeah, it has,” Ashton agreed, ruffling Nathan’s hair. “What have you been up to, bud?”

  “Why does everyone keep messing up my hair?” Nathan groaned, scrubbing his hand over his head.

  “Because it’s too short to braid,” they quipped. “What else are we supposed to do with it?”

  “I don’t know, Ash. I think he could rock cornrows,” Kate giggled. “Maybe we should give it a try and see.”

  “No!” Nathan grumped.

  Everyone but the kid in question started laughing…and then there was a knock on the door. I froze, and my arms immediately tightened around Nathan.

  My father had figured out where I was. He’d just been waiting until after church to come here and drag me back home. Because nothing was more important to him than keeping his congregation under his thumb, not even me.

  “It’s okay, baby,” Brendan said, squeezing my knee before standing up. “It’s just Nay and Alex. I asked them to come over.”

  I sighed, and it felt like the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders. I was still safe.

  “Why are you scared, Darla?” Nathan asked as his brother headed to the door. “Is it because your dad’s trying to find you?”

  I was sure my eyes got as big as saucers. How did he know that? I knew Brendan wouldn’t have told him.

  “How did you hear about that?” I choked out, barely audible.

  “He told everyone at church. He said you ran away,” he mumbled, slipping his arms around me and laying his head on my shoulder. “And I can tell you’re scared of him. I’ve known that for a long time.”

  I looked at Brendan, trying to figure out what to say. As it was, I wasn’t quite sure how to tell Nathan that he couldn’t tell anyone he’d seen me here. But honestly, despite how risky it was for Nathan to be here right now, Brendan couldn’t have given me anything I would have loved more. He gave me a sad smile, which I took to mean that it was okay to tell Nathan a little bit about what was happening.

  “Yeah, I am,” I admitted. “That’s why I left, and it’s why I can’t go back to church for a while. Brendan told you that it’s not safe to tell anyone you saw me, right?”

  He nodded. “I won’t. I promise.”

  I cracked half a smile. I hated that I was asking him to keep something from his parents. It sounded awful when I really thought about it. But it was for the greater good.

  “Who’s hungry?” Alex asked as he walked in the door carrying three pizzas.

  “Me! All I’ve had all day is cookies and coffee,” Kate said, grabbing her purse and pulling out her glucose meter. “My blood sugar’s probably through the roof.”

  I still remembered how freaked out we all were when Kate passed out in the middle of the cafeteria one day in our sophomore year. She’d been rushed to the hospital, and after running some tests, the doctors had diagnosed her with juvenile diabetes and said that her blood sugar was dangerously high. There was some official name for what was going on with her, but I couldn’t remember it. They’d started her on insulin shots, but that only lasted a few months before her doctor decided that she needed to be on a pump instead. For a little while, she was super self-conscious about the little bit of weight she was putting on, but we’d all told her that we’d rather see her gaining some weight and know that it was because she was getting the medicine she needed than watch her pass out again.

  “Oh, my God,” she gasped.

  “How bad is it?” I asked.

  “Almost four hundred,” she mumbled.

  “Kate,” Ashton scolded her. They were more obsessed with making sure her blood sugar was at normal levels than she was.

  “Um, we were kind of preoccupied this morning. Giving myself a bolus wasn’t really the first thing on my mind.”

  She pulled her shirt up and unclipped her insulin pump from a belt loop on her jeans, then pushed a couple of buttons on it.

  “What’s that?” Nathan asked as he eyed the device.

  “It’s my insulin pump,” she explained. “Remember how I told you I’m diabetic?”

  He nodded.

  “Well, this is what gives me my medicine. Most of the time, it does its job without any help from me, but I’m supposed to tell it to give me a little extra if I eat something super sugary, and I forgot this morning.”

  “So you have a machine attached to you all the time?” he asked, cocking his head a little.

  She chuckled. “Yep. I’m like the Bionic Woman.”

  That made him giggle. “That’s kind of cool. Not that you need the medicine, but that you have a machine that gives it to you.”

  “Yeah, it’s pretty nifty.” She smiled at him.

  “Well, the Bionic Woman needs to move and let me hug Darla’s neck,” Naomi said, playfully nudging her.

  Kate giggled and stood up, and Naomi took her spot and wrapped her arms around me.

  “You okay?” she asked quietly.

  I shrugged. “Better now. I needed this. How much did he tell you?”

  “Nothing. He said he’d let you tell me.”

  “I will,” I promised. “Just…not now.”

  “Whenever you’re ready.” She rubbed my arm. “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Hey, Nate, let’s go wash our hands so we can have some pizza,” Ashton said, standing up. “Come on.”

  I let go of Nathan, and he hopped down from my lap and followed Ashton into the kitchen, and Brendan stole Ashton’s spot on the couch, wrapping an arm around me and pulling me into his side.

  “Your dad said something at church this morning,” he whispered. “Basically told the entire congregation to be on the lookout for you.”

  My eyes stung a little, even though I couldn’t really say I was surprised. I knew my dad wasn’t about to just accept me being gone so easily. I honestly wasn’t even sure if staying with Kate would be enough to keep him off my trail.

  “Kate wants me to stay with her,” I told him.

  “She told me. That’s why Ash took Nate into the kitchen for a few minutes.” He planted a kiss on my temple. “As much as I want to keep you here with me, I think it’s a good idea.”

  “I know it’s stupid, but I’m scared of what I’ll see when I close my eyes if you’re not there,” I admitted quietly. “I always knew I couldn’t stay here, but being here with you was the only thing that kept me sane last night.”

  I heard the TV turning on, and I looked to find Ashton and Nathan sitting on the floor with plates of pizza, flipping through channels. As happy as I was to see Nathan, I was grateful to have a few minutes to talk to Brendan right now and try to figure out what my next move was.

  Brendan’s one-armed embrace tightened, and he put a hand under my chin and turned my head back so I’d look at him. “It’s not stupid. No more stupid than me saying that even after one night of having you in bed next to me when I fell asleep, I don’t know how I’m going to be able to sleep without you. But it’s only for a little while. And I promise you, I’m going to make sure we still see each other.”

  “I mean, I’m just saying, there’s a window in our spare bedroom that’s easily accessible,” Kate chuckled. “Or you can just walk in the front door. The regular night
time visits can still be a thing if you want them to be. My mom won’t mind. Especially knowing what you’ve been through. Just maybe keep the noise down so you don’t wake us up.”

  I snorted and felt myself turning bright red as I buried my face in Brendan’s chest. He chuckled and kissed the top of my head.

  “We’ve perfected the keeping the noise down thing over the past couple of years,” he said. “Baby, why don’t you stay here tonight, go to school tomorrow, and then follow Kate home from there?”

  “I was thinking the same thing,” she agreed. “Then Mom and I can get your room ready for you.”

  “You realize this plan hinges on her being willing to let me stay there at all, right?” I pointed out.

  “She will. I told you, she already loves you just because she knows how important you are to me,” she insisted. “You’re my family, Darla. And family helps each other, no matter what.”

  My chest tightened and a lump rose in my throat, but I refused to let myself cry. If I started crying again, I knew I’d never stop.

  How was it that my own father was the one causing me so much pain and my mother was too weak to stop him, while the people who were stepping up to help me had no obligation to whatsoever? I guessed it just went to show that, at the end of the day, blood wasn’t what made a family. A family was built on love and commitment and dedication to one another. And mine was right here.

  Chapter 25

  Darla

  Tenderness on the Block

  I could barely keep my eyes open as Kate drove toward the local used bookstore after school on Tuesday. As sweet as her mom, Annie, was, it had still felt beyond awkward to just show up at her house with a duffel bag, and to have someone I didn’t even know tell me I was welcome there for as long as I needed. And between being in an unfamiliar environment and being terrified to be alone, I’d gotten maybe an hour’s worth of sleep last night.

  “We’ll go in first,” Kate said as she pulled into a parking spot and took the key out of the ignition. “I saw a picture of your dad on the church’s website, so I know what he looks like. Then I’ll text you if the coast is clear.”