Alaska, With Love

by Sandrine Gasq-Dion

soak some more. So, I say Jacuzzi for a bit, and then we’ll play it by ear.” Mark smiled and tried to keep his mouth closed as Josh’s emerald eyes met his blue ones. Josh was absolutely breath taking. He’d been taking care of him for almost a week now, answering calls for him and playing body guard. It was so sweet. “I’m sorry you’re stuck with me, Josh. I’m sure you have somewhere else you’d rather be besides taking care of me.”

  Josh kept his eyes focused on Mark’s, although they wanted to roam. “I’m here because I want to be Mark. I know what you’ve been through, and I just want to make sure you recover from this.” Mark’s eyes were so blue… ah shit. He was going to have to call Mateo, this was too fucking weird.

  “Okay, well uh, I’ll go get in the Jacuzzi then.” Mark turned to leave and then turned back. “So breakfast is?” “I’ll have it done in a few minutes. I promise not to set the house on fire.” Josh smiled and winked. Mark’s legs almost went out from underneath him. He gripped the wall and forced a smile to his lips. “Okay, thanks Josh.”

  Josh waited to hear Mark get all the way down the hallway before letting his breath out. Holy shit, his fucking cock hurt so bad. He needed relief and fast. He didn’t want to be caught with a boner. He cracked six more eggs and watched them this time, trying to keep thoughts of Mark out of his head. Mark wet in the shower, Mark smiling at him, Mark sitting naked in the Jacuzzi…. Who was he kidding? He had a thing for the guy. He looked down and saw the eggs were brown again. “Dammit.”

  ~Chapter Three~

  Josh ended up making a run to McDonald’s for pancakes and sausage and a generous helping of McDonald’s hash browns. Josh loved the hash browns. He grabbed as much food as he could, and high tailed it back to the house. Mark was in the Jacuzzi, eyes closed, relaxed. Josh stood by the deck and just smiled. His mind was wandering again and he realized he was holding the bag in his hand a bit too tight. It made a crackling sound, and the next thing he knew Mark was looking at him; and the look in his eyes, oh Lord, he’d seen that look before, but in a woman’s eyes. It was that, I’d-like-to-touch-you look. “Um, I burned breakfast so I bought some.”

  Mark smiled and got up, dripping wet, grabbing his towel. He stepped out of the Jacuzzi and made his way over. Stopping in front of Josh, he put his hand out. “You want me to take it?”

  Josh was looking down into very blue eyes, and felt his pulse racing. “I didn’t know what you liked, so I bought a bunch of stuff.”

  Mark looked in the bag. “Mmm… hash browns. My favorite.” Mark looked up to see Josh staring at him. “I

  cancook you know.”

  “Huh?” Josh was lost in those deep blue pools. God, he was drowning and he didn’t care.

  Mark smiled and took Josh’s hand. “Come on, let’s go eat.” By four in the afternoon Josh was crawling out of his skin. He’d already called Mateo, and he and Riley were coming for a visit. He was so confused he didn’t know whether to jack his ass or finger his dick. This had never happened to him before. He’d never gotten a hard on from looking at a man, and it was freaking him out. Josh didn’t have anything against gays even though his Dad had.

  He’d been raised by a career military man and walked the straight and narrow path. Had he closed that part of himself off? Once his dad passed away, Josh threw himself into the Army. He did three tours overseas, and

  notoncehad he looked at another man. Now he couldn’t

  fucking stop. He heard the car on the gravel driveway and ran out. Mateo was getting out of the car with a wide grin.

  “Asshole!” Mateo laughed.

  “Dick head.” Josh smiled and hugged him. “How ya been?” “ Good, really good.” Mateo looked over at Riley and smiled. “So what’s up? You sounded freaked on the phone.”

  “ Josh?” Mark stood on the front porch looking from Josh to…oh God... “Mateo?” It looked like him, the hazel eyes. That face.

  Mateo’s eyes went wide. He knew those eyes, those lips. “Mark?”

  Josh looked from Mark to Mateo confused. “You guys know each other?”

  Mark made his way closer and looked into hazel eyes. “It is you.” Mateo grabbed him and hugged him hard. Mark had been the one guy before Riley that got him, that had made him feel special. That had wanted him. “Oh my God, how have you been?”

  “ Not so good.” Mark hugged him back. They pulled away from the hug and Mark looked Mateo over. Jesus, but he’d gotten huge. “The last time I saw you, you were fifteen. I went to off to college. My Mom and Dad said you’d been adopted.”

  Mateo tried to smile. That had been a rough part in his life, losing Mark then being put back into foster care. “No, not long after you left they told me it wasn’t working out.”

  Mark shook his head. “Of course, they lied to me, why am I not surprised?” Mark caught the eye of the man standing next to Mateo. “God, I’m sorry. We’re just going on and on.”

  “ Shit, Mark this is my husband Riley Flynn-Esposito. Riley this is Mark Patterson. I stayed with his family for a year.”

  Riley was looking from Mateo to Mark, and then his eyes caught Josh’s. He looked like someone had punched him in the gut. “Um, maybe we should take this inside?” Riley smiled and extended his hand. “It’s good to meet you.”

  Mark’s eyes went wide. “Riley Flynn of Flynn Electronics?” “ One in the same, although I want to change it to Esposito-Flynn, but Mateo won’t let me.” Riley smiled and took Mark’s hand. “Come on, let’s go talk inside.”

  ~~~ If Josh thought having a hard on for a guy was bad, listening to Mateo and Mark reminisce about the old days was worse. He got the distinct feeling something went on between the two of them back then, and felt his gut dropping. Great, now he was jealous? What the fuck? He felt a hand in his and looked over to see Riley smiling at him. Obviously he wasn’t worried about Mateo and Mark, and it put Josh at ease a bit.

  “So Josh came on his white horse huh?” Mateo winked at Josh and smiled at Mark. Mark blushed and looked at Josh. “Yeah, he kinda shocked the shit out of me showing up while I was in the shower.”

  “ I bet.” Riley giggled and covered his mouth. The way Josh was looking at Mark, it was so adorable. “Um, can I steal Josh for a second Mark?”

  “Sure.”

  Josh looked shocked. He didn’t want to leave Mark alone with Mateo. “Wait, what? Why?”

  “Chillax Josh, I’ll watch Mark.” Mateo winked. “Uh huh, that’s what I’m afraid of.” Josh blinked and his

  breath stopped in his throat.Oh shit! I said that out loud.Josh stood there stupefied.

  Riley grabbed Josh’s hand and pulled. “Okay, so we’ll be right back.” Riley dragged him outside by the garage and looked up at him. Josh was blushing in various shades of red, and wringing his hands. Riley smiled. The guy had a crush, a bad one. “Spill it, Montgomery.”

  “Huh?”

  Riley looked at him, raising a brow. “Oh please. You were looking at Mark all lovey-dovey, like a love-struck

  teenager. And the jealousy is justpermeatingfrom your

  skin. Not to mention, I don’t think you intended to say that to Mateo back there.” Josh sighed. “It’s that obvious?” Riley nodded and Josh ran a hand through his hair. “Fuck, I don’t know what the fuck is going on. I’ve never been attracted to a man that I can remember, but fuck if I’m not constantly hard around Mark, and fantasizing about kissing him.”

  “Well heishot.” Riley giggled again at the jealous look

  on Josh’s face. “He’s really pretty.”

  “I know.” Josh tried to smile. Riley took his hand. “Look, there’s nothing wrong with finding him attractive. Are you worried about what people will think?”

  “ Yes….no…I don’t know, I don’t think so.” Josh sighed. Was he? No, not really, he actually never gave a flying fuck what people thought of him. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”

  “ Nothing is wrong with you, just promise you’ll be open to it ok? I almost lost the best thing that ever happened to
me because I was afraid. Trust me, it’s worth it Josh.”

  ~~ Mateo couldn’t get over it. Mark Patterson, he hadn’t seen him in years. Mark told him the whole story about his kidnapping and, well, other things; and Mateo felt his blood boiling. He guessed Mark got the hint he was getting ready to explode, because he changed the subject to Riley, and Mateo smiled. “God he annoyed me to no end.” Mateo smiled, thinking about Riley and his purple hippo.

  A smile hit Mateo’s eyes, and Mark knew Mateo was in love. The rest-of-your-life kind of love. “I’m so happy for you Mateo.” Mark took his hand, he felt Mateo squeeze it.

  “ I’m just glad you’re okay. I’m glad Josh got you out of there.” Mateo saw Mark’s eyes when Josh’s name was mentioned. “Uh oh.”

  “What?” Mark met Mateo’s eyes and felt his cheeks heating. “ You have a crush on Josh.” Mateo sat back smiling. Oh yeah, Mark had it bad for Josh Montgomery. In all the years he’d served with Josh, he’d never even had a suspicion the man was gay. The way Josh had reacted to Mark, Mateo knew Josh didn’t think he was gay either.

  “No I don’t.” Mark looked anywhere but at Mateo.

  “Besides, he’s straight isn’t he?”Wasn’t he?

  “ The way he acted just now, when I said I’d watch you?” Mateo smirked. This must be what Josh was so freaked out about. He had feelings for Mark. Mateo had the sudden urge to run circles around Josh singing “You love Mark and you’re as gay as I am.” He fought it hard and barely won.

  Mark let out a loud sigh. “So I wasn’t imagining it?” “ Oh hell no,” Mateo laughed, and laughed even harder at Mark’s confused look. “That boy is all kinds of fucked up right now.”

  Mark let out a loud relived sigh. “Okay, for a second there I thought my gaydar had driven off a cliff.” “ Well, I think we should put Josh in the BI lane, he’s fucked plenty of women.” Mateo sat back and put his feet on the chair across from him. “But he’s a good guy.”

  “ I got that much, and God he’s so swoon worthy.” Mark chuckled. “I wanna squee all the time when I’m in the same room with him.”

  “Squee?” Mateo arched a brow.

  “Never mind,” Mark laughed and got up. He opened the fridge and looked inside. “You guys staying for dinner?” “We have a house we’re going to look at today. Riley actually likes Benson, and he’s decided to move here.” “And what about you?” Mark grabbed chicken out of the fridge.

  “I love it here, it brings back good memories.” Mateo

  looked at the kitchen counter.Really good memories.

  “Eww.” Mark’s nose wrinkled. “I don’t even want to know.”

  Mateo laughed and hugged him. “We’ll be staying in town tonight, so can we come for lunch?” “ Who’s having lunch? And where?” Josh stood in the kitchen door way with his arms crossed. God, he knew he was transparent, but being around Mat brought out a side of him he hated. The inferior side.

  “ Well, if it’s alright with you, I was just telling Mark that Riley and I are looking at a house out here; and we wanre staying at a bed and breakfast in Pearce overnight. We could come here for lunch tomorrow if that’s ok?”

  “Yeah, it’s cool.” Josh smiled as Riley squeezed his hand. After Mateo and Riley left, Mark made dinner and they ate it quietly. Mark, not knowing what to say, and Josh dealing with the feelings he was having for Mark. Just weird all around. Even the way Mark ate was beautiful. The way his lips wrapped around that chicken, the way his tongue came out to catch the escaping sauce from his lips. Josh almost groaned watching the man eat. And God help him, he was painfully hard… again.

  Where do you live?” Mark couldn’t stop staring at “

  Josh’s chest. He was shirtless and had a tattoo of a scorpion with its stinger up, on his right pectoral muscle.

  Josh lost his grip on his fork, and it hit his plate with a loud crack. The sound of another voice in the room had startled him. “Uh, Alaska.”

  “Really?” Mark’s eyes went wide. “Where at?” “ Fairbanks, you ever been there?” Josh picked his fork back up and started eating again. He needed something in his mouth to stop him from sounding like a complete idiot. He groaned again, because God help him, that thing he was thinking about keeping his mouth shut with was attached to Mark.

  “No.” Mark sighed. “I always wanted to go though, take a tour through Denali maybe even a cruise someday.” “You should, it’s beautiful out there.” Josh’s eyes caught Mark’s and they stared at each other.

  “Maybe you could give me a tour.” Mark’s voice sounded like silk and there was an invitation in there, and not just for a tour of Denali. There was a promise in there of a lot more rocking besides the cruise ship. Josh swallowed hard. “Sure.”

  With dinner dishes cleaned up and put away, Josh settled into bed a little after midnight. Mark had gone to bed early, and Josh had gone to jack off in the shower thinking about Mark. He closed his eyes and saw it again. Mark underneath him, mouth partially open, moaning, saying Josh’s name as Josh slid into that perfect ass, feeling that hot wet heat on his cock, while he rubbed his body against Marks softness. Josh squeezed his eyes shut and tried to think of tits instead,

  big beautiful bouncy tits. On Mark’s ass.Dammit.Josh

  rolled over on his side and tried to go to sleep, but every time his eyes closed he saw Mark’s face; Mark’s beautiful porcelain face with big pools of blue and luscious beautiful lips. “Shit.”

  ~~ The next two days were more of the same. Josh was fighting a losing battle every day. Just seeing Mark in swim trunks had Josh’s mouth watering. Arizona in June was hot already, but Josh was sweating on a daily basis, just from being in Mark’s presence. His cock was rock hard twenty four hours a day and it seemed to Josh that he would die of blue balls. He was jacking off every night in the damn shower, and it didn’t seem to be doing him one fucking bit of good. All he saw was Mark’s face, Mark’s lips wrapped around his cock. Josh was pretty sure he was going to go crazy any day now.

  They had just finished up another excruciating dinner, and Josh was loading the dishwasher when he felt Mark’s hand on his arm. He backed up a little too quickly and hit his head on the wall. “Ow.” Josh massaged his head. Mark made his way over and Josh backed up again.

  “ Hey, let me look okay?” Mark ran his fingers gently over Josh’s scalp. He found en egg sized lump on the back of Josh’s head and smiled, rubbing it. “You should put ice on that.”

  Josh was leaning forward and he hadn’t even realized he was doing it until he felt Mark’s breath on his face. He straightened up and stood up tall. “Um, okay well, I’m going to bed.” Josh practically ran out of the kitchen, leaving Mark standing there with his mouth hanging open. Josh got to his room and shut the door. He sat on the bed and ran a hand through his hair. “What is wrong with me?”

  ~~ Sleep couldn’t come fast enough, but Josh finally fell out. It felt like five minutes, and Josh’s eyes opened like they had springs in them. Josh heard moaning, but it wasn’t the sexual kind. He got up, gun in hand, and crept through the house, eyes adjusting to the darkness. It was Mark, and it wasn’t moaning, it was crying. Josh opened the door partway. Mark was asleep, but dreaming; and not the, oh-yeah I’m-getting-fucked-so-good’ kind. Josh put the gun down on the night stand and sat on the edge of the bed, running his hand through Mark’s hair. Mark bolted upright and his hand grabbed Josh’s wrist. Mark’s eyes went wide and a strangled scream left his lips.

  “It’s me!” Josh grabbed his shoulders looking in his eyes. Mark blinked and then the crying started. Josh held him as he felt the sobs racking Mark’s body. He felt the wetness on his shoulder, then on his neck as Mark moved there to hide. Josh fought to stay in control, because getting a hard on when some guy was crying on your chest was not an option. Especially after what Mark had been through. He sat there and held Mark in his arms and the feelings came all at once, he wanted Mark, in every way possible. He’d never felt like this before, not for anyone. The sobs quieted down
and Mark let out a small hiccup. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and looked up into Josh’s eyes.

  “Pretty girly huh? I was always told I was a girly guy.” “Pretty, that’s for sure.” Josh moved away to the other end of the bed. Mark realized Josh was still shirtless, and oh my, Josh had a body to play with. The things Mark could teach him. Do to him. “You think I’m pretty?”

  “ Yes.” Josh’s gaze swept over Mark.

  You’ve never been with a man?” Mark slid closer.“

  Josh looked into those blue eyes and felt his dick

  getting hard again.Dammit.“No.”

  Mark stopped. He wasn’t going to push Josh. When Josh was ready he’d come for him. Mark pulled his knees up to his chin and watched Josh devour him with his eyes. “What?”

  “This is weird for me. I’m…attracted to you.” Josh saw Mark’s small smile and pressed on. “I don’t know why, but the first time I saw you, I had a reaction and it freaked me out. But now, well… not so much.”

  “ Do you think about me? You know? Sexually?” As soon as he said it he didn’t need the answer, because Josh’s face held it for anyone to see.

  “Yeah, I do.” It was so quiet every noise could be heard outside. The wind, the coyotes, the freeway, a train, a car horn and most important the small gasp that came from Mark when Josh’s lips met his own. Soft lips and a gentle caressing tongue explored Mark’s slowly, sensually, and then a soft moan vibrated in his mouth. Mark felt a hand at his throat, fingers sliding up and across his jaw as Josh’s fingers played in his hair. The kiss became more heated and Mark’s heart was hammering in his chest. Josh pulled away, his breath coming out in uneven gasps as he looked at Mark’s face.

  “Oh God….I’m sorry….” Josh got up and backed away. “I shouldn’t have done that.” Mark got up. “It’s okay, Josh.” Mark stayed where he was; Josh looked like a cornered animal. His chest was heaving and his eyes darted back and forth looking anywhere but at Mark.