Outcome

by Kim Pritekel

  I looked down, feeling silly and awkward, but I wanted to know.

  "Haley? You asked how I felt for you, what do you feel for me? I mean, it’s kind of a moot point now, but," I looked up at her. "I’d still like to know."

  "Well," She sat back against the couch, her hand taking mine in both of hers. "I know that I love you, and I think it’s romantic love, but I just have absolutely no reference point to compare to. I’m so confused in that way. I know I want you with me always, I hate when you leave. Even when you get up to go to the bathroom, I feel such a loss." I smiled, understanding. "I feel so empty when I think about my life without you now. How I did it for so long, I’ll never know. But what it boils down to is, I think I have far too many emotions and worries flowing through me right now to really narrow it down. Does that sound like a horrible cop out?"

  I shook my head. "No. Because I understand. I’ve had a bit more practice with this whole woman thing." I smiled, and leaned forward, our foreheads touching.

  "What do we do now, Andi?"

  "Make the best of what we’ve got left, I guess." I brought my hands up, placing them on either side of her face, bringing my mouth to hers, gently laying my lips against hers, holding the kiss for long moments. Haley brought a hand up to rest on my arm, then I felt her mouth open slightly, and I followed suit, our lips gliding against each other. There was no tongue involved, but it was beautiful, sweet, and sensuous all at once.

  Finally I pulled back, staring into the face of the woman who would haunt me for the rest of my life, crashing doubts and what-ifs on my head.

  "Will you stay?" she asked. I nodded, she smiled. "Good. I’m so tired."

  Haley stood, gathering both her rabbits.

  "Here, let me help you." I took Oreo from her, and followed her up the staircase. She was so exhausted, nearly falling asleep on her feet. I knew I probably looked much the same, for I sure as hell felt it.

  The rabbits put away, I turned to Haley, who had flopped down on the end of her bed, just staring at me, her eyes red-rimmed and half-closed. I knelt down in front of her, and pulled both of her socks off, tossing them aside.

  "Lay down." She fell backwards, and I tugged at the waistband of her sweats, pulling gently. The pants removed, they joined the socks, and I started on the sweatshirt, leaving her in her tee and underwear. "Come on, Haley." I helped her to the front of the bed, where she laid down. I pulled the blankets over her tucking her in. She stared up at me, staring into my eyes. We said nothing, only stared. I was about to turn away when the covers were flipped down. I turned, brows narrowed, and tucked her in again. About to go, they flipped down again. I looked at her with questioning eyes.

  "Stay," she said. I looked at her, knowing she wouldn’t have offered if she hadn’t wanted me to. I quickly stripped down to my own tee and underwear, slipping under the covers, laying on my back. Haley immediately scooted over to me, curling her body toward mine. I reached to her, slipping my arm under her neck, and pulling her toward me. She laid her head on my shoulder, snuggling even closer, and sighing. I closed my eyes, a smile on my lips.

  * * *

  I awoke, but didn’t open my eyes. A smile came to my face as I could feel the warmth against the front of my body. I took note of all my limbs, feeling Haley’s back against my chest and stomach, my arm over her waist, hand resting against her stomach. Taking a deep breath, I inhaled her scent, trying to snuggle even closer to her.

  Pushing myself up on my elbow, I watched as Haley breathed, deeply, evenly, the intense morning light of the sun washing into the room to shine upon the bed, and bring out the highlights in her dark hair.

  I sighed with contentment, bringing my hand away from Haley’s stomach to her face, using my fingers to trace the lines and contours of it, the slope of her forehead, leading to her nose, straight, just the right amount of curve, leading to full, parted lips that concealed beautiful, white teeth.

  As I touched her, those lips turned up in a smile, a soft sigh escaping. Her eyes remained shut, but her body scooted back further into me.

  "You hungry?" she murmured. God, her voice was so sexy in the morning. I’d forgotten that.

  "Maybe. What are you making?" I asked, my fingers continuing to trace over her face, and down her neck.

  "I can make whatever you want. I want you to have a good breakfast before you go to work." I lowered my head, resting it on Haley’s pillow.

  "Well, as sweet as that is of you, I’m not going to work today." Her eyes opened, and she glanced at me over her shoulder.

  "You’re not?" I shook my head. She smiled.

  "Me, either."

  "Oh, yeah?" She shook her head, closing her eyes again. "Well, what a happy coincidence." I chuckled.

  "I agree. Care to spend the day with me?" She turned in my embrace, eyes opening again.

  "Really? You want to spend the day with me?"

  I looked at her, a smile spreading across my face as I nodded.

  "Definitely."

  * * *

  "Do you have the tickets?"

  "Yes."

  "The card?"

  "Check, captain."

  "Are we on time?"

  "Andi, chill, woman." I felt Haley’s hand on my arm as I drove us toward Rift’s Skating Rink. Today was Kendall’s eleventh birthday, and for some reason, it was really getting to me. How had it gone so fast? My girl was going to be a teenager in two years! How was that possible?

  "God, how did she get so old so fast, Haley?" I glanced over at my passenger, who was already looking at me.

  "I don’t know." She smiled at me, putting her hand on my leg. I thought back to January 26, eleven years ago. I had been at school, right in the middle of class when my water had broken. School hadn’t been in session for too long after the holiday break. I had hoped Kendall would decide to come during the break, but it didn’t happen that way.

  At least she had decided to make her appearance on a Friday. By Monday I was back in school, as Vince and Michelle Torrini were taking care of their new baby girl.

  Shaking myself out of my thoughts, I turned into the parking lot, readying myself to face a dozen ten and eleven year olds, excited by the prospect of roller skating and sugar-rich foods.

  Haley grabbed the wrapped gifts that she had bought for my daughter, and I had the envelope in my hand, which held her card, as well as three tickets to go see Tempo Toys. I figure she could take Michelle, and some friend of hers.

  "Andi! Haley! You’re here!" We were both bowled over by a very excited little girl, giving us a double hug.

  "Hey, kiddo." I leaned down, and got my own hug, squeezing the girl tight, then poking her in the ribs. She giggled, then ran off to where her party was in full swing, with all her guests on wheels, skating at blurring speeds around a wooden floor with loud music being pumped through speakers.

  "Do you skate?" Haley asked, looking around, her eyes bright with childish glee. I shook my head.

  "Never."

  "You’re serious? Oh, honey, that’s about to change."

  "No, Haley. I’m fine, really. If you want to go strut around on eight wheels, be my guest. I’m quite fine sitting with Michelle."

  "Andi, Michelle’s out there." She pointed toward the rink. Sure enough, there she was, going around and around, sometimes holding the hand of some child, sometimes just skating, a huge smile on her face.

  "Well, okay, I’ll sit by myself."

  "Nope. Let’s go." She grabbed me by the hand, and marched my butt to the counter by the door where you rented your skates.

  "Can I help you?" the pubescent boy asked us.

  "Yes. I’d like a pair of size nine, and," she turned to me, "Andi?"

  "Uh," feeling like a deer who was caught in the headlights, "seven."

  The boy headed back into the room, and came back with two pairs of skates. He set a pair in front of each of us.

  "Okay, Andi. Come on." I was led to a bench in another room where there were lockers. "I can’t believe you�
�ve never been roller skating. That’s just criminal." Haley muttered as she helped me to lace my skates.

  "I didn’t exactly have a normal childhood filed with lots of little, excited girls, you know." She looked up at me, shaking her head.

  "Then I’ll just have to make up for that."

  "If I die, you can have my house." Haley chuckled, and grabbed my arm.

  "Okay, now be careful. Standing will be interesting for the first time." I pushed myself up, but not much happened, other than the skates wanting to roll right out from under me. "Whoa. Hang on to me." I did.

  Slowly we made our way to the skating rink, where pulsing music met us.

  "God, these children are better at this than I am." I muttered. Haley chuckled.

  "Come on, old woman. You can do this. It’s all about balance, and I know you have a ton of that with everything you do." She led us toward the wall, which had carpet covering the bottom half of it. I figured that was for losers like me who would be using the wall to stop myself, instead of the floor.

  "Oh, shit!" The floor was far more slick than it had originally appeared, and for some reason, the wheels of my skates wanted to just take off.

  "It’s okay. You’re doing fine, Andi," Haley put her arm around my waist, going slowly with me. I felt fairly safe between Haley and the wall, but still wasn’t that keen on this whole roller skating idea.

  Just up ahead was a small ledge, and I greedily grabbed onto it. Haley stopped behind me.

  "Um, Andi?"

  "Yes?"

  "See, the whole idea behind this is to actually move."

  "Bite me."

  "Ohh, tempting." I glanced back at her, nearly falling on my ass for the effort, and saw a lecherous grin on her face.

  "Kendall’s birthday party has been set up, so anyone here for the birthday girl, head on over to the recreation room."

  "Oh, thank you god! Saved by the birthday cake," I muttered. Haley chuckled, and helped me to pull my way back along the wall toward the festivities.

  * * *

  I headed toward the hospital, a smile upon my face, a bit of pep in my step. It was Valentine’s Day, a day and holiday which I generally despised, and sometimes ignored under the guise of forgetfulness. But not this year. I’m not even sure why, but today it meant something to me.

  I smiled my way into the lab, waving at Samantha as I made my way to my office. I unlocked the door, flicked on the light, and stopped. Sitting on my desk was an envelope, the likes of which cards come in.

  Brows narrowed, I sat behind my desk, and picked it up. I could hear movement near my office door, but didn’t look up. My attention was taken by the pink envelope in my hands. Biting my lower lip, I tried to decide who I thought it was from. And, how the hell had it gotten into my office?

  Anyway, I ripped the top of the envelope open, and slid the card out. On the front was a big, hairy ape, his arms crossed over a massive chest. In large, red letters above his head, read:

  How much do you mean to me?

  Smiling, I opened the card, and black, paper ape arms sprung out at me, opened wide.

  THIS MUCH! HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY

  I chuckled, then read the hand-written message.

  Andi, you are quickly becoming my world, and that scares the crap out of me, but I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else. XOXO

  I heard some giggling outside the door, and I looked up to see who had been standing there the entire time.

  "Samantha?"

  Giggle, giggle,

  She stepped out from around the corner, a grin on her face.

  "Yeah, boss?"

  "Did you leave this here?" I asked, waving the card at her. She shook her head.

  "Nope."

  "But you know who did?" She nodded.

  "Yep."

  "And you’re going to tell me, right?" Again, she shook her head.

  "Nope."

  "Great. You’re fired." She grinned, and headed back into the lab. I read the card again, and then glanced over at the phone. Chewing on my lip again, I picked it up, and dialed the three numbers of the extension that I knew so well.

  "Haley Corregan."

  "You’ve got some explaining to do," I said, my voice low, menacing.

  "Excuse me?" she said, sounding confused. I chuckled.

  "Have you been this way this morning?" I heard a low, throaty chuckle on the other end of the line.

  "Nope."

  "You haven’t been to the lab today?"

  "Nope."

  "Are you lying?"

  Silence

  "Did you leave me a card today?"

  "Nope."

  "You didn’t leave a card here for me this morning?"

  Silence

  I grinned, amused at the game.

  "You know, my dear, your silence says everything" I heard the chuckle on the other end of the line.

  "Happy Valentine’s Day, Andi." I smiled, ear to ear as I looked at the card again, wishing so badly that Haley was in my office right now, or I was in hers so I could thank her properly.

  Whoa, chick! Hey, when you stopped dreaming, you stopped living, and as long as Haley was in my life, I definitely wouldn’t stop dreaming.

  "Thanks. Happy V-day to you, too."

  "V-day, huh? Are we going into war?" I could hear the smile in her voice.

  "Maybe. Want to send this soldier off right?" She laughed outright.

  "You’re just so adorable."

  "So, you busy later?" I asked, grabbing a pencil from my desk, and leaning back in my chair as I played with it.

  "I am."

  My mood fell like a lead balloon.

  "Oh."

  "Are you? Busy tonight?"

  "Well, maybe."

  "Oh, yeah? Got a hot date?"

  "Well, I don’t know. I think my date went and got herself another one."

  "Oh, ouch. Hate it when that happens. Hmm, well then that might throw a wrench in my plans for tonight."

  "And, why’s that?"

  "Well, if my date thinks that her date has abandoned her, then that means my date will be staying home. I can’t have her do that, now can I?"

  My spirits lifted as though they’d been given a mental dose of Viagra.

  "Well, then perhaps my date mislead me?"

  "Perhaps. What say you head on over to my place with a bottle of wine at six-thirty?" Haley said. I smiled into the receiver, my hand reached out to the cord, fingers running along it, caressing it.

  "Okay. I think I can handle that."

  "Great. Well, as much as I really don’t want to go, but my nine-o’clock is here."

  "Okay. See you later."

  "Bye, gorgeous," she said, sending chills through me.

  "Later."

  * * *

  I grabbed the box that was on the passenger side of the Jeep. Careful to balance it on one hand as I closed the door, and pressed the locking mechanism on my key chain. I made my way to the door, seeing the lights on in Haley’s townhouse. How was it possible that one woman, hell, anything belonging to that one woman, could put me at such ease, and make me feel better? I truly believe that anything that was ailing me, she could make it all better with just one look, or one touch.

  Taking a deep, contented sigh, I knocked on the door. It didn’t take long before I heard footsteps, and then silence. I could tell I was being watched through the fisheye on her door. I stuck my tongue out, and grinned for my audience. Hearing giggles from the other side, I, too smiled.

  The door opened, and Haley smiled at me.

  "Hey, you," she said.

  "Howdy." I reached into the box. "This is for you," I handed her the bottle of white wine I’d bought.

  "Thank you much."

  "This is for you," I handed her the bottle of red. "And this," a bottle of champagne.

  "Are you going to try and get me drunk so you can take advantage of me?" she asked a twinkle in her eyes.

  "Maybe. This is for you," I handed her a heart-shaped box of chocolates,
"And finally, these." I handed her the bouquet of roses I’d picked up for her.

  "Oh, Andi. God, you are so sweet." She brought them to her nose trying to balance the flowers with the armful she already had. I took the wine from her, and she took a deep breath, inhaling the beautiful scent of the roses. She smiled at me. "Thank you," she whispered, then looked to her left down the street, and then to the right, then back to me before giving me a full, loud smack on the lips.

  Grinning like an idiot, I followed her inside.

  I looked around, stopping where I stood. Haley had moved the couch out of the way, probably in the spare bedroom, I assumed, and had a huge, double-sized air mattress set up, piled with blankets and pillows in front of the TV, and a stack of rented movies next to it on the floor. Behind the mattress was the coffee table loaded with covered dishes that smelled absolutely divine.

  "Man, that smells good. What do you have going," I reached for one of the dishes, only to have my hand smacked.

  "You’ll see. It’s actually a new recipe, and I hope you like it. And, um, I hope you like this," She indicated the blankets and pillows. I grinned, nodding.

  "I think it’s great, Haley. Thanks so much. This will be a blast." I glanced at the movie titles, seeing such greats as ‘When Harry Met Sally’, ‘While You Were Sleeping’, and ‘Sleepless In Seattle’

  "I figured all those were appropriate," Haley said, taking the wine from me and heading into the kitchen to put the roses in water.

  "So, what did you make?"

  "It’s a Spanish dish called paella. Chicken, pork, shrimp, muscles, rice and tons of veggies. I really hope you like it." She called as she grabbed a couple of wine glasses.

  "It sounds great, and smells even better."

  "I hope so." Haley gave me a small peck before setting our glasses on the edge of the coffee table, and handing me a plate. "Load up."

  Soon we both sat cross-legged on the mattress, facing each other. Haley had the heat up to a nice temperature, so we lounged around in sweat shorts, which Haley had provided, and me in a tank, her in a simple tee.

  She watched, waiting for me to take the first bite, her face expectant. I wondered if she were even holding her breath.