Tattoos & Tears (Complete Collection)

by Amiee Louise

“Meet me. Meet me for a coffee. We can’t just leave things like this, baby cakes.”

  I snatch my wrist away and shake my head. “No, fuck you! I’ve got nothing else to say. Goodbye, Callum.”

  I turn around and walk quickly off down the street with my head held high wiping my tears on my sleeve as I walk. I walk into the pizza restaurant, and the hostess smiles tightly at me.

  “Good afternoon, madam. How can I help you?”

  I clear my throat knowing I must look a mess and paint on my best fake smile.

  “I’m here to meet Sam Newbolt?”

  She straightens her skirt and pushes her hair away from her face.

  “Yes, madam, Mr. Newbolt is waiting for you. If you’d like to follow me, it’s right this way.”

  She smiles, and I follow her to the table. Sam is sitting in a corner booth at the back of the restaurant; he is smiling and looking relaxed with his arms spread out over the back of the booth. Cole is guarding the booth, and he tips his hat as I approach.

  “Good afternoon, Peyton.” He smiles, and I smile back.

  “Hey, Cole.”

  Sam stands up and smiles. He takes one look at me, and his smile fades. He holds me at arm’s length, regarding me intently.

  “Hey, you’ve been crying. What’s wrong, babe?”

  I shake my head, and it takes all my strength not to cry again. I get into the booth, and Sam sits next to me. I go to move away from him, and he gently grabs my wrist. His face is filled with worry and concern.

  “Baby, please talk to me. What’s wrong?”

  I don’t speak, because if I do, I know I’ll break down.

  “OK, fine. Cole,” Sam says calmly, and Cole leans into the booth. “Could you bring the car ‘round and drive us to my place? Have the restaurant box up some pizzas to-go, please?”

  Cole nods, ever the professional, and smiles before he leaves. I look up at Sam, my eyes brimming with tears as he strokes my face.

  “What’s wrong, baby? I hate to see you this upset. You’re killing me here, please talk to me, and tell me what’s wrong.”

  I shake my head, and a stray tear rolls down my cheek. He wipes it away and clenches his teeth. I take a deep breath trying to compose myself, but it isn’t helping.

  “Someone’s upset you, babe, and when I find out who it is, I’m going to fucking end them. I’ll make sure they never hurt you again.”

  There is something in the way he says those words that chills me to the bone. Those words make me instantly believe that he would hurt anyone who laid a finger on me. I shake my head again and swallow a lump back from my throat. I look at him and manage to tell him what’s wrong.

  “The girl who Callum cheated with, he says she is … your sister. Is that true?”

  His eyes darken, and he avoids eye contact. I know straight away that it’s the truth and I feel like I have been punched in the gut. Panic rises in my chest. Please, God, don’t have a panic attack here. I close my eyes and take a few deep calming breaths.

  “Fuck! I had no idea he was your ex, babe. I swear, not until I saw the picture of him in your flat. I was going to tell you eventually, but I just wanted to protect you.”

  I scoot around the other end of the booth and get up from my seat. In a flash, Sam is in front of me leaning down. He is so close I can feel his breath on my cheek.

  “Please, Peyton, you have to believe me. We’ve had so many fucking setbacks with our relationship so far. Was it him who upset you?”

  I am silent, and he tilts my chin up to face him.

  “Look at me, I’ll ask you again. Is it Callum who upset you?” he asks sharply, and I nod. His face turns angry, his nostrils flare, and he clenches his fists.

  “I’m going to fucking kill him,” he says too calmly for my liking, and I reach for his hand, stroking his knuckles softly.

  “Please don’t do anything stupid, Sam, he is not worth it. It was nothing, really, I’m just being silly. I just bumped into him on the way here.”

  He takes a breath. “So he is the reason why you’re in this state? I’d hardly call that nothing,” he spits out angrily.

  I get up, and we head towards the exit of the restaurant. As we step outside, there is a group of paparazzi waiting for us. Sam puts his arm possessively around my waist and pulls me towards him to protect me from the flashes. I hold my head down, and Cole pulls up at the kerb just in time in a silver Aston Martin V8 Vantage with tinted windows.

  “Sam, are you and Peyton an item? Come on, mate, just one picture.”

  Sam pushes the lens impatiently away from us and swings the car door open. I climb in, and he crowds in behind me. He slams the door, and we speed off down the street.

  “I’m so fucking sorry about all this, babe.”

  I shake my head. “It’s not your fault, it’s who you are, and it comes with the territory. I get that, I really do. I just can’t stand you keeping stuff from me. I’m hurt that your sister was the one who took my ex-boyfriend from me. I’m so fucking angry right now.”

  I raise my voice and grip the door handle of the car so tightly my knuckles turn white. He strokes my face.

  “If I could shield you from all this” He gestures around us “The press, your ex, the fact that the girl who turned your world upside down is my sister, my fame. I would in a heartbeat, babe, you have to believe that, and I want you and only you,” he says huskily. “You’re the best thing to happen in my life in a long fucking time. I get so lonely out on the road, but you’re like the sunshine, Peyton, a light in the darkness, a rose among the thorns.”

  He nuzzles my neck. I burst into uncontrollable tears at his words and the depth of feeling I feel for him.

  “Hey …”

  An adorable yet sexy look of concern washes over his features.

  “Shhh, please don’t cry, I hate to see you cry. It tears me apart.”

  He moves closer to me, and I am intoxicated by his scent. His closeness in the intimate space of the car makes me feel oddly horny. Tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear, he nuzzles my neck again. I sniff and dry my eyes on the sleeve of my jacket. Suddenly, I don’t feel upset anymore, I feel bold, and I climb onto his lap. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him passionately on the lips, pressing my lips eagerly to his. His hands snake around my waist, and he runs one hand gently up my spine.

  “Not here, baby, you’re more to me than that. You deserve silk sheets, champagne, and strawberries for the first time I take you. I want to take my time devouring every inch of your body, slowly and sensually.”

  I look into his eyes. “Don’t you want me, Sam?”

  He bites his lip as if trying to restrain himself.

  “God, of course, babe. Don’t ever think that I don’t want you. I fucking want you more than you’ll ever know, more than my next breath,” he whispers and pushes his hips into me, allowing me to feel the evidence of his arousal. “Does that feel like I don’t want you?”

  I shake my head.

  “I need you to take it away Sam,” I whisper to him, and he nods.

  “I know, baby, and I will. I promise you. Just not here, you’re not like any of the other women I’ve been with, you deserve to be treated … right.”

  He strokes my face, and I climb off of his lap. Defeated, I resume my position next to him, and before I click my seatbelt in place, the car pulls to a stop. Cole parks the car, gets out, and comes ‘round to open Sam’s door. Sam climbs out, and I climb out of the other side. We are in an underground car park; Sam walks around to my side and reaches for my hand. He interlinks his fingers with mine, and we walk over to a lift. Cole pushes the call button, and the lift is there within seconds. We all get into the lift; Cole presses the button for Sam’s place, and the lift starts to ascend. Sam has wrapped his arms around me and is holding me protectively as we silently rise up to Sam’s floor. The lift comes to a halt, and we step out into a large foyer area minimally decorated in accented black and white. It looks very modern and very masculine with bl
ack and white floor tiles and a black glass table in the corner. I look around, and Sam smiles at my awed reaction.

  “You like?”

  I nod in approval. “Yeah, it’s … not what I imagined.”

  He laughs. “You haven’t seen the rest of it yet!”

  I smile, and he leads me across the foyer floor. He unlocks and opens a large, black, oak door. He gestures for me to step in before him. I step in, and the living room is a large open space with a huge black corner sofa against the wall dominating the space with a huge canvas of what I recognise as the boys’ first album cover over the sofa. What astounds me is the wall of floor-to-ceiling glass doors at the furthest end of the apartment that leads out onto a balcony terrace. I can see the o2 arena, The Cutty Sark, and an array of tall buildings from his window—the view is breath-taking and looks out across the city. I walk slowly over to the window and look out.

  “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” He slides his hands around my waist from behind.

  “It’s … breath-taking,” I voice my thoughts aloud.

  He rests his head on my shoulder. “Just like you.”

  He twirls me around and pulls me close to him. I bury my head in his chest—I feel safe in his arms.

  “So, are you going to tell me what that dickhead Callum said to you to make you so upset?”

  He looks down at me. Way to ruin the moment. I pull away and walk across the apartment, needing some distance from him.

  “Peyton, talk to me, please don’t walk away from me.”

  I spin around, suddenly angry with him for asking. The mood completely changed from a minute ago.

  “You’ve got no idea what it was like for me when he cheated and to find out that girl is your sister. What do you expect me to say, Sam? I really don’t get it.”

  I stop myself from calling her worse names, and he shakes his head.

  “I had no idea, baby, I promise. Sav is … She is strong, determined and if she sees something or someone and it belongs to someone else, she is like a dog with a bone: she doesn’t give up until it’s hers.” He hangs his head. “You have to believe me, babe.”

  I shake my head. “Tell me one thing, Sam, is everything you’ve ever said me been a lie? You’re telling me what I want to hear just to get me into bed?”

  He looks shocked and hurt by my outburst, but I don’t give him a chance to speak.

  “He was with her when we lost our baby; he was in bed fucking her when I was in the hospital in agony and in bits because our baby died,” I choke out, my voice thick with tears. He goes to step towards me, but I hold my hand up. “No, don’t, Sam, please just don’t.”

  He flops down on the sofa in defeat and scrubs his hands down his face.

  “He showed me a picture of you. Him and your sister on his phone, she’s … pretty.”

  He maintains eye contact with me.

  “Callum and me, we’re not friends; I tolerate him for Sav’s sake—”

  “Take me home, Sam.”

  He gets up from the sofa and comes towards me.

  “You don’t mean that, babe. Please, I want you to stay and talk to me. Let me in, don’t push me away.”

  I shake my head. “No, we’ve been through enough these past few days. This relationship is over before it’s even begun. It’s too much, Sam. I can’t, my heart can’t cope. I’m done.”

  He goes to the door, hanging his head in defeat and pushes an intercom.

  “Cole, yeah, could you come and take Peyton home please, mate? Thanks.”

  He releases the button, and I go to open the door. He spins me around and pushes me against the door, his hands on either side of my head, pinning me to the door, so I can’t get away. His face is inches away from mine, and I bite my lip.

  “God, I want you so fucking badly it hurts; I can’t think of anything else. I dream of being inside you, of seeing the expression on your face when I make you come,” he whispers huskily, and I’m not sure if I’m in the presence of Sam or Bolt. I avoid eye contact, and he thrusts his hips into me. I feel his erection straining against his jeans push into my thigh.

  “Look what you do to me, and you haven’t even touched me. No woman has ever had the effect that you do.”

  Just speaking in that whispered husky voice is making me want him so badly. I know that if I look at him, I am going to give in to my body’s urges and turn into a puddle at his feet. I shake my head.

  “Bolt … don’t.”

  He looks at me as if I have just slapped him in the face and he recoils away from me.

  “Do you really think I was being Bolt then?”

  I look at him unwillingly.

  “Everything I’ve said and done has come from Sam, not from Bolt. Bolt would have charmed you and had you in his bed and screaming with pleasure the day we met. He would have turned on the charm, had his way with you, and told you to get your knickers on and fuck off afterwards, no post-sex cuddling, no emotion, nothing,” he snaps out, and I grip the door handle. “If you want to go, go. I won’t stop you, but before you leave, know this, it’s just you now, Peyton, just you.”

  I lean my head against the door and close my eyes. I breathed deeply trying to fight the strength of the emotions he evokes in me. I grip the door handle harder until my knuckles turn white, then I open the door and leave.

  “Fucking fuck!”

  I hear Sam shout and a loud crash as the door closes. I walk out into the foyer, avoiding eye contact with Cole, and walk straight past him into the waiting lift. I wait until the doors close until I break down in uncontrollable tears. By the time the lift stops, I have just about composed myself, and I step out into the underground car park. I see a door at the far end that leads out onto the street and go towards it. I push the door open and into the fresh air, and I walk away from Sam’s house and out of his life for good.

  12

  Peyton

  I get back to our flat and open the door. Ruby is lying on the sofa with a hot water bottle on her stomach softly sobbing. I throw my bag down and rush over to her. Crouching down next to the sofa, I stroke her hair and she looks pale. As she looks at me, I know that she went through with the abortion.

  “I did it, Peyton.”

  I look sympathetically at her and hold her hand.

  “Why didn’t you call me? I would have been there for you.”

  She shakes her head. Seeing her like this breaks my heart.

  “For you to talk me out of it?” she sobs, and I stroke her face. “I feel empty, Peyton.”

  I nod and place a kiss on the back of her hand. “I know, babe, I know.”

  I swallow back the lump in my throat. It breaks my heart to see my best friend like this.

  “I’ll make us some coffee.”

  I get to my feet and take off my jacket. I hang my coat up on the hanger and go into the kitchen. Ruby follows me as I switch on the coffee machine and get my favourite personalised purple ‘Peyton keep calm and drink coffee’ mug from the cupboard. She changes the subject and places her black ‘Rock stars do it better’ mug on the worktop.

  “How come you’re not at work? Skiving?”

  I lean my head against the cupboard.

  “No, I didn’t have any appointments, so Seb gave me the afternoon off.”

  “How was your lunch date with Sam?”

  I would rather not talk about it.

  “Babe?”

  I shake my head. “Please Ruby, just don’t,” I snap.

  “Come on, what happened, babe? Talk to me.”

  “I bumped into Cal.”

  She turns to look at me, silently disapproving.

  “Please tell me you’re fucking joking.”

  The coffee machine finishes, and I pour the steaming hot black liquid into both mugs.

  “Wish I was. Look, Rubes, you don’t need to listen to my problems you’ve got your own to deal with, babe.”

  “Don’t be silly babe; it will take my mind off my own shit for a bit.”

  Smiling,
I say, “Turns out, the girl Cal cheated with is Sam’s fucking sister.”

  Her mouth drops open, and she puts the milk and sugar in her mug.

  “Fuck me, Peyton, what are the odds? The slimy little wanker.”

  She goes into the living room and sits down on the sofa. I pour the milk into my coffee and spoon in two sugars. Stirring it, I walk carefully to the sofa. Ruby scoots her legs over, and I sit down next to her.