Zip, Zero, Zilch

by Tammy Falkner

  “I hope this all works out like you hope.” Matt squeezes my hand again and then he goes to his station and starts to set up for the day.

  My only hope is that I’m doing the right thing.

  Peck

  A knock sounds on the door and I go look through the peephole. Emily and Logan are kissing on the other side of the door, with Kit smushed between them.

  “God, you two are like r-rabbits,” I say as I open the door.

  Emily buries her face in Logan’s chest. After a second, she raises her pink cheeks and looks at me. I step back and she walks into the apartment with Logan and Kit following her.

  “Thanks for doing this,” she says as she drops a diaper bag onto the sofa and starts to unpack it. “These are her favorite toys. And her food is in here. She’s not picky, and she knows signs for her favorite things, so don’t be surprised if you see her use them.”

  I’m happy to babysit Kit. I’m just really surprised they asked me. They usually use a network of the brothers and their wives. “Do you two have big p-plans today?”

  Logan points to his ear. “Pre-op appointment.”

  “Do your b-brothers know?” Surely Sam would have mentioned it to me.

  He shakes his head. “We wanted to do this alone. So I’d appreciate it if you could keep it to yourself.”

  “You want me to l-lie to him?”

  “No…” He shakes his head. “We’re putting you in a bad spot, aren’t we?”

  “You really should t-tell them.” Their feelings are going to be hurt if he does this without them. “It’s a big deal and you need your family for this.”

  Emily punches his shoulder. “See, I told you so. You need to tell them.”

  He swipes a hand down his face. “Okay. After this appointment, I’ll tell them that I’m giving up my culture so that I can have an operation. That I’m taking back all the ways they changed for me so that I can hear. It was all for nothing. Their learning to sign. Their learning to communicate with me. Their lifestyle changes, like flashing phone monitors, and captioned television all the time. It was all for nothing.”

  “You’re not nothing,” Emily tells him. “And that’s exactly why they learned everything they did. And you’re not changing. You’re not giving up anything.”

  I feel like I shouldn’t be here, so I bend down and pick Kit up. She lets me lift her in my arms and she starts to babble at me.

  “What did she say?” Logan asks. I can hear his teeth grinding as he waits for my response.

  “Nothing, really,” I tell him.

  “See, that’s what I need to know.”

  “I get it,” I tell him. And I totally do.

  “What we don’t get is why you feel the need to do this alone.” Emily isn’t pulling any punches with him at all.

  He wraps his arm around Emily’s shoulder and pulls her against him. “I’m not alone.”

  Emily rolls her eyes and hands me a piece of paper with phone numbers on it. “Call me if anything goes wrong, okay? We should be gone at least until this afternoon.” She hugs me really quickly. “And thank you for doing this. I didn’t know who else to ask. I mean, I could have asked one of the others, but then I’d have to lie about where we’re going and I didn’t want to do that.” She glares at Logan. “I still don’t want to do that.”

  “One of the others?” I’m not sure what she meant by that.

  “One of the other Reed girls.” She grins at me. “You’re officially a Reed Significant Other.” She starts to tick items off on her fingers. “So, you’re officially invited to girls’ night, makeover parties, and shopping trips.” She jerks a thumb toward Kit. “And babysitting.” She grins.

  Honestly, I feel honored she even asked me to watch Kit.

  Emily hands me a toy. “If you’ll shake this around and make lots of noise, we’ll sneak out the door when she’s not looking.”

  I take the toy and do a little dance with it, and Kit follows me down the hallway as fast as her little legs will take her. I hear the door open and shut, and then it’s just me and the baby. When she goes back into the living room, she notices her mom and dad are gone and she plops down on her bottom and lets out a long and disgusted wail.

  I shake the toy and make faces at her, but it does no good. I drag her diaper bag over, trying to find something to take her mind off her parents, and she spies her bottle. She pulls it from a pouch on the side of the bag and pops into her mouth. She immediately quiets.

  Well, I never saw a self-serve baby before. Maybe the rest of the day will be this easy.

  Sam

  I knock on the door and step back, about to shit my shorts in fear. Marta opens the door and looks up at me and grins. She motions me forward. “Is Emilio here?” I ask. I wipe my feet on the doormat.

  She crosses her arms in front of her chest. She has flour on her cheek and her forehead is damp.

  “Am I interrupting you?” I ask.

  “Not at all.” She motions for me to follow her to the kitchen. Emilio is there and he’s icing cupcakes, grumbling to himself.

  “Are you here to help?” he grouses.

  “Um…” I straighten my spine. “Actually, I came to talk to you.”

  His eyes narrow.

  Marta smiles at me, winks, and walks out of the room whistling.

  “What do you want?” he asks. He blows out a breath.

  He’s struggling with a bag of icing. I motion for him to hand it to me. “What are these for?” I ask.

  “Marta got a wild hair up her ass and decided she had to make several million of these little fuckers for the bake sale at the church.” He grumbles obscenities. “The girls were supposed to help her, but Peck suddenly had something she had to do today, and the rest of them haven’t shown up yet. So who gets drafted?” He points to his chest. “Me, that’s who. And I fucking hate this shit.” He glares at me. “What did you come here for?”

  “Oh, nothing,” I mutter.

  He sets down the cupcake he’s holding. “Nothing’s wrong with Peck, is it?”

  “No, she’s fine.”

  I start to pipe icing onto a cupcake. Emilio watches me and grins. “You can stay,” he says.

  I laugh. “I’ll stay. I have an hour before I have to be somewhere.”

  He takes another batch of cupcakes out of the oven. I’ve honestly never seen so many cupcakes in one place before. They’re everywhere.

  “So what brought you here?” Emilio asks.

  I don’t set the icing bag down, because it’s nice to have something to do with my hands, although they’re suddenly shaking. “I wanted to talk to you about Peck.”

  “What about her?”

  “I wanted to see if you’d have any objections to me asking her to marry me.”

  I hear a whoop from the other room. Emilio rolls his eyes.

  “Why do you want to marry her?”

  Why do I want to marry her? She’s just Peck. And I feel like she was made for me. “Um…”

  “The answer is no, if that’s the best you can do.” He points to the cupcakes. “Ice them,” he says.

  I ice quietly for a few minutes, trying to gather my thoughts.

  “Didn’t expect you to give up quite so easily,” he suddenly says.

  I look up. “Oh, I’m not giving up. I’m just thinking.”

  “You about done with that?”

  I shake my head. “Not yet.”

  “Keep icing.”

  Suddenly, Marta strolls into the room. There’s purpose in her stride and I back up against the wall, because I’m afraid I’m her target. But I quickly see I’m not. She goes for Emilio, but he must be used to this. He runs around the corner of the center island and she chases him. She picks up a rolling pin and runs, but he runs a little bit faster. Suddenly, she stops and blows a stray lock of hair from her eyes. “Stop tormenting the poor boy,” she says. She shakes the rolling pin at him.

  “Oh, Jesus Christ,” he breathes. “I was having fun with it!” He grins. Th
en he sobers completely. “Did Peck tell you about the day we met?”

  “Yes, sir,” I tell him.

  “What she didn’t tell you was my side of it.” He rubs at the back of his hand. “I had been hanging out in the boys’ ward at the home, and one of the little assholes bit me on the back of the hand, so I was in a bad mood. I wanted nothing more than to get out of there. I walked around the corner, trying to find Marta, and I saw her sitting beside a little girl. I took one look at that kid and I said to myself, She’s my daughter.” He takes a deep breath. “I know it sounds stupid, and I suppose it should. But she was sitting there on the edge of the bed and she wouldn’t speak. But when she looked at me, she said a million words with her eyes.”

  Marta wipes a tear from her cheek.

  “I have loved that little girl from the minute I met her. I never doubted that she belonged to us, and neither did she.”

  He waits a beat.

  “The first time she spoke to me was when she had a set of drumsticks in her hand.” He looks at me. “Do you know what she said?”

  I shake my head, and swallow past the lump in my throat.

  “She took my hand and said, ‘I’m glad you’re my dad.’ It was one big stutter, and I loved every syllable. She makes me so fucking proud.” He points a finger at me. “She’s fucking perfect, so if you so much as make her cry, I will find you and jam her drumsticks so far up your ass that you’ll taste them ten years from now. Do you understand?”

  “Yes, sir.” I swallow again.

  “So, yes, you can marry my daughter. And you better make her happy every day for the rest of her life, because I will be watching. Understand?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  He points to the cupcakes. “Keep icing.”

  “Yes, sir.” I grin.

  Marta lays a hand on my shoulder. “Did you get a ring yet?”

  “No, ma’am. I wanted to get permission first.”

  She looks at Emilio and quirks a brow. He nods.

  She disappears into a bedroom and comes back a minute later with a box.

  “It was my mother’s,” Emilio says. “Peck used to try it on all the time when she was small, and she loves it. So you can use it if you want to.” He’s grumbling, but I can tell he’s serious.

  I pop open the box and stare down at a beautiful antique ring. “It’s lovely. Are you sure it’s okay if I use it?”

  He nods. He points to the cupcakes. “Keep icing.”

  “Yes, sir.” I smile. I stay until the four remaining Zeroes get there, and then it becomes an estrogen-filled party. Emilio disappears into his office and I get out of there as quickly as I can.

  ***

  I let myself into my apartment and stumble to a stop. Peck is lying on my couch, and she’s not alone. She has a naked baby—well, naked except for a diaper and a pair of pink socks—sprawled across her chest. They’re both asleep. Peck’s hair is sticking out in every direction, and she’s sweating where Kit is pressed against her neck.

  Why on earth is Kit here with Peck? And where is Logan? He was MIA this morning and his daughter is here? What the fuck?

  Kit has her thumb stuck in her mouth and she’s sucking on it every few seconds.

  I reach down and brush the hair from Peck’s forehead. Her brown eyes blink open and she smiles softly at me.

  “Hi,” she whispers.

  “Hi,” I whisper back at her. “Why is Kit sleeping on you?”

  “She got tired and started screaming, and she wouldn’t stop. She cried until she made herself sick, so I changed her, and then she did it again, so I just left her naked.” She lowers her chin to look down at the child. “She’s adorable when she’s sleeping, but the rest of the time, not so much.”

  “Why is she here?”

  “Emily and Logan had somewhere they needed to go.” She avoids my gaze.

  “Where?”

  She shrugs, but Kit stirs and she holds her breath. Kit’s eyes fly open and she pushes up on her arms. Kit’s cheeks are red and her face is damp and shiny where she’s been drooling. Peck wipes her neck with her sleeve and grimaces.

  “If she becomes nice just because you’re here, I might have to throw you out the window. Just sayin’.”

  Kit grins at me and holds her arms out, so I take her and sit down with her on the other end of the couch. She sticks out a finger to point at Peck.

  “I think she’s hexing me,” Peck grumbles.

  “She likes you,” I tell her. “She just doesn’t know you well enough yet. She’ll learn.”

  Kit has blond hair and blue eyes like Logan, and her two little hair bows are skewed from sleeping on my girlfriend.

  “That’s my girlfriend,” I tell her.

  Peck’s eyes widen. “Is that what I am?” But she’s smiling and blushing a little, so I think she’s okay with my declaration.

  “Yep. That’s what you are.” A grin tips the corners of my lips. “I feel like I should be passing you a note in class, one all folded up tight. Will you be my girlfriend? Check yes or no.”

  Peck gets up on her knees and leans over me, pressing a quick kiss against my lips. “I would check the yes box,” she tells me.

  Kit rears back and slaps the side of her face.

  “No!” I scold. And Kit’s eyes fill up with tears.

  “Oh, crap. You broke it,” Peck mutters. She picks up a toy and shakes it in Kit’s face, and Kit climbs from my lap to Peck’s and starts to play. That’ll last about thirty seconds, I figure.

  “Where did you say Logan and Emily went?”

  “I didn’t.” She sets Kit on the floor with her toy and gets up to get a drink. She comes back with two and hands me one. “How was your day?” she asks.

  “It was fine.” I’m not even going to tell her about how I’m planning to handle her mom’s situation with Bone. I’d rather just do it and tell her about it later. It’s easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission.

  I pat my pocket. I’m saving the ring for the right time.

  I roll my shoulders. “I’m sore from today’s workout with the trainer.”

  “Want me to rub your shoulders?” she asks.

  I pull her to lie across me and kiss her forehead. “Maybe later.”

  She’s quiet for a few minutes as Kit plays on the floor, and then she suddenly whispers, “You know, I’m leaving in two days. Six whole weeks away on tour.”

  I squeeze her a little tighter. “I know. I hate it.” I lift her a little so I can look into her face. “Any chance your period will be done before you leave?” I whisper in her ear.

  She tucks her face into my chest. I can feel her words, hot through my T-shirt. “Probably not.”

  I nudge her. “Are you blushing?”

  She nods, her nose brushing my side.

  “How many boyfriends have you had?”

  She stiffens in my arms. “Why do you ask?”

  “I’m just curious.” I shake my head. “You don’t have to tell me.”

  “Define boyfriend.” She sits up, pushing her hair back behind her ear as she leans back on the other end of the couch. I lift her foot and pull it into my lap.

  “Someone you hung out with, had meals with, spent time with, who was probably a man. With a penis.”

  “Well, I’d hope a man would have a penis.” She grins.

  I tug her toe until she squeals.

  “Not many, if you’re really curious. My numbers are pretty low.”

  I narrow my eyes at her. “I wasn’t talking about sex.”

  “What’s the difference?”

  “We haven’t had sex yet, and I consider you to be my girlfriend.”

  “What we’re doing…” She motions from me to her and back. “…I’ve never done this before.”

  My heart swells a little, and I find it hard to take a deep breath all of a sudden. “Really?”

  She nods.

  “Good, because I feel the same way.”

  She blushes.

  Suddenly,
there’s a knock on the door. Kit’s head pops up and she runs toward it. “Ma ma ma ma ma,” she babbles.

  I pick her up and hold her while I open the door. Logan stands up a little straighter when he sees me. “What are you doing here?” he asks.

  “I live here.” I lean in the doorway. “Did you forget something here? Your keys, maybe?” I look down at Kit. “Oh!” I cry. “You forgot your kid.”

  He claps his hands and Kit jumps into his arms.

  They walk in long enough to gather her things from all over the place, get her dressed, and then they get ready to leave. Logan is acting funny, and I have no idea why.

  “You okay?” I ask him.

  He nods. “We need to get home. We still have to finish packing.”

  Emily hugs Peck and they huddle together for a second. I hear the words tomorrow and it’ll be fine.

  “What’s happening tomorrow?” I ask, as I follow them to the door.

  Emily looks up at Logan and prompts him with her eyes.

  “Nothing,” he mumbles.

  He flashes me the I love you sign and leans over so Kit can give me a kiss, and then he walks away.

  “What was that all about?” I ask Peck.

  She shrugs. “What are you making for dinner?” She grins at me, and dips her face into her shoulder like the question embarrassed her.

  “What would you like?”

  “Anything you want to make.” She lifts her shirt and smells it. “But I need a shower, because I smell like a kid threw up on me over and over.”

  I walk close and sniff her. “You kind of do.”

  She scrunches up her face.

  “Need help with your shower?” I grin at her and waggle my eyebrows.

  “Not unless you’re a glutton for punishment.”

  I kind of am. So I follow her to the bathroom. We aren’t going to do anything. But I can touch her. And look at her. And just be with her. This having-a-girlfriend thing is pretty awesome.

  Peck

  The whole Reed clan shows up to see us off. I should have expected that, since Logan and Emily are going with us. But still, the Reeds en masse are a force that can be a little overwhelming. They’re just so damn big and there are so many of them.