Dare to Love

by A. L. Brooks

  “Carmen! I thought that was you.”

  Ash noted the slight shift in Carmen’s expression but couldn’t quite read what it meant. It was almost panic, but undercut with something else.

  “Frederick.” Carmen’s smile seemed forced. “How lovely to see you.”

  Ash turned to see who had approached. The man was perhaps in his mid-fifties, with greying hair and a red-veined face that suggested he drank a lot of alcohol. He wore an expensive-looking suit, and a Rolex hung loosely on his left wrist. He almost smelled of money, and Ash was reminded of all the overpaid wankers who’d run the investment bank division she’d worked for. She only just held back a grimace.

  “How are you?” Frederick asked of Carmen, although he flicked a glance to Ash and back again.

  “I’m good. And you?”

  “Oh, fine, just fine.” He looked at Ash once again, then said to Carmen, “I saw Gerald yesterday for lunch.”

  Carmen looked completely unperturbed by the comment. “How is he?”

  “He’s well. I still can’t believe you two aren’t together anymore. You were such a great couple.”

  His almost snivelling tone set Ash’s teeth on edge. This guy was a creep.

  He gave Ash another look, longer this time, and she found herself torn. Surely Carmen should introduce her, even if the guy was an arsehole? But she hadn’t, so did that mean she didn’t want him to know who Ash was? Do I offer a handshake or what?

  While Ash pondered the options, Frederick turned back at Carmen. “So, how’s business?”

  Their stilted conversation batted back and forth, interspersed with yet more looks from Frederick in her direction. Meanwhile, Ash’s anxiety—and, she had to be honest, annoyance—over just why Carmen hadn’t bothered with introductions climbed.

  “Well,” Carmen said eventually, “if you’ll excuse us?” Without waiting for a response, she lightly touched Ash’s arm and led her away from him.

  Ash followed her to the far end of the gallery, breathing evenly to ensure she didn’t say something too biting once she did have Carmen’s attention.

  “I’m very sorry.” Carmen put her glass down on a small table and turned to face Ash. “I know that was rude of me, to not introduce you.”

  Ash placed her glass next to Carmen’s. “I don’t know about rude, but it was pretty awkward.”

  Carmen winced.

  “Why didn’t you?”

  “Frederick is…” Carmen huffed out a breath and ran one hand through her curls. “He’s an ass. He and my ex, Gerald, worked together for many years. I’ve met him a few times and never trusted him. I have a feeling if I’d been dating anyone but Gerald, Frederick would have attempted something with me.”

  “Well, he sounds nice. But that still doesn’t really explain why you pretended I wasn’t even there.” Okay, maybe that came out a little harsher than she’d intended.

  Carmen flushed a deep pink. “I’m sorry. I panicked. The last thing I wanted to do was give him any reason to be on even worse behaviour, so I decided not to introduce you. You know, as my partner. I…I’m not sure we’re even calling each other that, and I can only imagine what he would have done with that titbit of information if I’d offered it.” She shook her head. “I could have just introduced you as a friend and left it at that, but I didn’t want you being insulted. So, I…I did nothing. I screwed up, and I’m sorry.”

  “So it was all about him being a wanker? It wasn’t anything to do with being embarrassed to have a female partner?” She had to know and sooner rather than later. No matter how good things had been between them the last couple of days, so far they’d not been seen together as a couple by anyone Carmen knew.

  “Absolutely not!” Carmen took a step back and lowered her voice. “You…you think I’d think that?”

  She looked horrified, and it made Ash’s stomach clench. “I’m sorry. I know that sounded bad. But you’re so new at all of this, and we’re so new. I guess I need to remember that and not jump to any conclusions when situations like this crop up.”

  “It would help, yes.” There was a hint of acid in Carmen’s tone Ash had never heard before.

  Ash stepped in close and took Carmen’s hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I could have maybe phrased it differently but I had to be honest with you about how it made me feel.”

  Carmen exhaled and squeezed Ash’s fingers. “You’re right. We do have to be honest with each other.” She pursed her lips. “It’s a bit of a minefield, isn’t it? I mean, all this getting to know someone properly. Not being casual.” She gave a wry smile.

  Ash laughed and stepped even closer. “It is. But I’m up for it, if you are?”

  “Definitely.” Carmen’s voice was husky, and Ash’s skin tingled.

  “Want to call it a night?”

  Carmen glanced around the room. “I don’t necessarily want to stay here now.” She turned back to Ash. “But it’s not even eight o’clock. I know it’s Sunday and we both have to work tomorrow, but I don’t want the evening to end.”

  “Well, let’s get out of here and find somewhere to sit. Maybe have a glass of wine, a little bite to eat?”

  “Sounds lovely.”

  Ash leaned in, emboldened by the warm smile Carmen sent her way, the kind of smile that lit her up from the inside out. “And maybe we can have another slow walk somewhere quiet. Really slow.”

  Carmen’s eyes smouldered, and Ash’s temperature rocketed.

  At just after eight on Tuesday night, Carmen pushed open the door of Ash’s studio.

  Ash stood from her seat at the desk. “Hey. This is a nice surprise.”

  “Hi. I, um, just thought I’d pop in and say hello.” Carmen’s face was warm. Such impromptu gestures were not her style at all. At least not when she’d been dating Gerald or any of her boyfriends in the last ten years or so. But she hadn’t been able to get Ash out of her mind after their Sunday art gallery date. Not after the words they’d spoken and the new level of understanding they had. And the kisses. Oh God, the kisses. Carmen didn’t think she’d ever felt so much from kissing a person. Not even Lewis. When she was wrapped up in Ash’s arms, with Ash’s mouth making wondrous things happen to Carmen’s senses, time seemed to stop. The bench they’d found in the corner of a square near the British Museum had become their enclave, and if it hadn’t been for the hardness of the seat, Carmen could have stayed in Ash’s arms for hours. As it was, she’d gone home aching, aroused, and barely able to remember how to get her key in her front door.

  “You can pop in any time.” Ash walked around the desk.

  Carmen couldn’t find words. Ash looked so good, so tempting in a sleeveless, black T-shirt that showed off her glorious arms and those tight, black jeans that always held Carmen’s attention.

  “You okay?” Ash stopped and stared at her.

  Carmen nodded, then moved. In two paces she was face to face with Ash, her hands on Ash’s waist. The small gasp Ash gave as Carmen pressed their lips together, hard, was one of the best sounds Carmen had ever heard. She pulled Ash closer and kissed her with everything she had, feeling the strength of her everywhere they touched.

  Ash’s arms quickly enveloped her, and she returned Carmen’s kiss with a fervour that made Carmen shiver. When Ash’s tongue dived deep into Carmen’s mouth, her arousal leaped into fifth gear. Possibly even sixth.

  Carmen moaned into Ash’s mouth, sweeping her tongue against Ash’s. Moments—minutes? hours?—later, she pulled back slightly so she could nibble Ash’s bottom lip.

  Ash broke the kiss first, breathing hard. “Jesus, what a way to say hello.”

  “I just… I couldn’t help it. You’re so…” Carmen swallowed. “You’re so sexy.” In a small part of her brain, telling another woman she was sexy sounded odd. But the rest of her stood up and shouted, Hell, yes!

  “Honey, you beat me by a country mile in the sexy stakes.” Ash gave her a lopsided grin. “Not that I’m sorry you’re here, but how come you a
re?”

  Carmen’s face heated. “Couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

  Ash gazed at her for a few moments, then cleared her throat. “Want to sit, or is this a flying visit?”

  “Sitting is good.” Before my knees give way . Arousal still burned brightly within.

  They snuggled up together on the sofa.

  “How was your day?” Ash trailed one fingertip into Carmen’s hair and twisted a curl around before letting it fall and repeating the gesture.

  The motion sent delicious tremors down Carmen’s back.

  “I’m good. Today was busy but okay. My favourite client came in, but all we talked about was you.”

  “Huh?” Ash looked adorably confused.

  “Tamsyn Harris.” Carmen smiled as Ash’s eyebrows shot up.

  “It’s going to take some getting used to, you knowing her as well as you do.”

  The idea popped into Carmen’s head and out of her mouth a millisecond later. “Well, you could get to know her too. And Maggie. Soon, if you like. How would you like to be my plus one at their wedding?”

  “Are you serious?”

  “I am.” She hadn’t thought about it in advance, and now that it was out there she should have been nervous. There’d be plenty of people from her world at the wedding, and turning up with Ash on her arm would be a rather large statement. But the more time they were together, the more Carmen knew this was something special, something to be proud of, and she shouldn’t be scared of showing it.

  “When is it?”

  “Well, I suppose that might be the only problem. It’s on a Saturday, the 26th of this month.”

  Ash rubbed at her chin with her thumb, then stood. She retrieved her mobile from the desk, sat back down, and scrolled a couple of times. “I might be able to make it work. I’ve got three clients booked in that day, but they’re all regulars, so if I call them tomorrow, maybe that’s early enough to be able to switch them around. Perhaps even to the Sunday.”

  “Ah, the wedding is in Norfolk. It would be, well, a whole weekend away.”

  Ash grinned. “A whole weekend with you? Even better. Okay, I am definitely going to try to make this work somehow. How soon do you need to know?”

  “There’s no rush. If I’m not going with you, I’m going on my own. Tamsyn’s booked out so many hotel rooms in the local area, one more room being required isn’t a show-stopper.” Carmen paused. Fierce heat rose up her neck to her face. “Um, I mean, assuming we’ll be in separate rooms. I…I don’t know what your thoughts are on that.”

  Ash shifted in her seat and rubbed at the back of her neck. She looked as red as Carmen felt. “Yeah, um, I don’t know. Maybe separate rooms would be a good idea. I mean it’s up to you. I want you. I guess that’s obvious.”

  Her wry grin tugged at Carmen’s heart as her words made Carmen’s libido leap to attention.

  “But I know this is all new for you, and I’m totally okay with you setting the pace.” Ash held her hand.

  Part of me wants to rush that pace. Right now. Carmen’s cheeks burned even hotter. But the rest of her was still a nervous wreck at the thought of actually getting naked with another woman that way. One day I do need to get over this, but not right now. “I think, um, two rooms is probably for the best.”

  “Well, all right, then.” Ash cleared her throat. “I have to say, this is pretty amazing. A whole weekend together.” She nudged Carmen. “And trust me when I say, that’s the best part about it. Sure, I want to meet your friends, and I know one of them is a world-famous actress and all that. But it’s the chance to spend such quality time with you that’s got me all excited. Just so you know.”

  “God, could you get any more adorable?” Carmen was thankful they were past the awkwardness over the hotel rooms.

  “I’m adorable?” Ash’s smile lit up the room. “Seriously?”

  Carmen rolled her eyes. “Yes, you are, but don’t go getting all big-headed on me.”

  Ash laughed and pulled Carmen into her arms. “I’ll try not to. Now, it’s been”—she looked at her watch—“at least ten minutes since I last kissed you. That’s way too long.”

  The kiss she gave Carmen then would keep her awake, Carmen knew, for quite some time later that night.

  Chapter 33

  On Thursday, Carmen worked non-stop from eight in the morning. She’d promised herself she’d finish by seven, if at all possible; she and Ash had a late dinner date at nine, and she wanted to be able to go home and change before then. But the pile of work on her desk and in her in-box laughed at the idea of her finishing so early. Okay, maybe eight and I don’t go home and change. I’m pretty sure I have a spare blouse in the cupboard.

  These few weeks of transition between the old business model and the new were naturally going to be like this, but she couldn’t wait for it all to be over. Despite a few unhappy customers, she still thought it had been the right move to streamline the client list.

  And maybe when the dust has finally settled, Ash and I could book ourselves a couple of days away somewhere . The thought gave her a thrill. Yes, they’d be spending a short weekend together soon, but that was all about Tamsyn and Maggie’s wedding. A couple of days of just her and Ash, now that was another story. Maybe during the week so she doesn’t lose her Friday and Saturday business . She knew by now that Mondays and Tuesdays were Ash’s quietest days. So yes, maybe head out of town early on a Monday, find some nice, cosy cottage to hole up in. Real fire, good food and wine, comfy bed…

  Her cheeks blazed, and she jolted so hard her wireless mouse flew across the desk and very nearly ended up on the floor. Lately, thoughts of getting more physical with Ash had taken up residence in her brain on a regular basis. She just wished they wouldn’t do so when she was at work.

  “You okay?” Monica asked.

  Carmen looked up, hoping her face would reveal nothing of her thoughts. “All good. Just had one of those twitches. You know, someone walking over your grave.”

  “Ugh, I hate those!”

  Carmen made to say more, but a loud voice from the reception area turned her head in that direction.

  “I don’t care if she’s busy, she can see me now! ”

  “Uh-oh.” Monica rose from her seat. “That sounds like—”

  Annabella Mitchell stormed through the office door. Her hair and make-up looked perfect, as if she’d just walked out of a beauty salon. But the ugly sneer on her face ruined anything good the makeover had hoped to achieve. “Is this some kind of joke?” Her voice was an ear-splitting screech as she waved a scrunched-up piece of paper in her hand.

  Carmen stood, her heart pounding. “Annabella, please. Why don’t you come in and sit down, and we’ll—”

  “And we’ll what? Have a nice cup of tea while you tell me how I’m not good enough to be represented by you anymore?” Annabella marched forward, her hands now on her hips.

  Out of the corner of her eye, Carmen saw Beverley hovering near the doorway, phone in one hand, the other clutched to her chest. Monica had moved away from her desk and also held her phone tightly in her hand.

  Carmen surreptitiously waved them both back. “Annabella.” She mustered her smoothest tone. “Please. If you’ll just sit down, we can talk about this.”

  “What is there to talk about?” Annabella’s shout echoed through the confined space of the office. “You’ve made it perfectly clear I’m being tossed out with the trash.” Her mouth twisted into a cruel grin. “I only came here tonight to tell you how much this is going to ruin you. I’m going to make your name mud in this industry. When I’m finished, no one will want you as their agent. No one!”

  “I’m calling the police.” Beverley’s voice quavered. “That’s threatening behaviour.”

  “No, it’s okay.” Carmen had no idea how she sounded so calm and balanced. “Annabella’s understandably upset. There’s no need for us to involve anyone else.” She took two tentative paces towards the actress. “I do get why you’re upset. Believe me
, this wasn’t an easy decision. And you’re not the only one we’ve let go.”

  “Oh, and that’s supposed to make me feel better, is it?” Annabella threw her hands up. She stepped closer and pointed a finger in Carmen’s face. “You’ll pay for this. Just you wait and see. I know a lot of people. A lot .”

  Carmen recoiled at the bitterness and fury on the actress’s face. Fear slithered down her spine. Annabella’s threats were probably empty bluster, but what if they weren’t? What if she did have that level of influence?

  Jesus, she could ruin me. What had seemed so easy, so achievable before now hung like a wrecking ball above Carmen, just waiting to crash down and destroy everything she’d worked so hard for. How did I underestimate her? And who else have I misread? There were at least ten clients she’d yet to hear from after the final letters had gone out the week before. If they all took Annabella’s stance…

  Maybe I can retain her. And a few of the others who complain. It would mean she’d still have to work long hours, and she would have to carefully pick which new clients she took on, given that; however, surely that was better than the entire business going under. Of course, that would mean less time with Ash, but she’d understand. Wouldn’t she?

  “Annabella, I don’t think there’s a need for things to go that far. Can I suggest you come back tomorrow? We’ll do lunch and talk this through.”

  A slight softening in Annabella’s posture gave Carmen hope. “Lunch tomorrow?”

  “Yes. Wait, let me just check my calendar.” Carmen grabbed her phone and scrolled through her calendar. It would take a bit of shuffling, but if it headed off this danger, it was worth it. “One thirty?”

  Annabella checked her own phone. “I suppose so.” She pouted, then spun on her heel and shoved roughly past Beverley in the doorway, who had to clutch the doorframe to avoid falling over.

  “Oh God, Beverley, are you okay?” Monica asked a millisecond before Carmen could.

  They both rushed over to the older woman and took hold of an arm each.

  “I’m…I’m okay.” Beverley’s eyes were wild. “That was scary.”