Luna Caged: Behind the Wall

by Margaret McHeyzer

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

  “I…”

  I don’t get to answer. Instead, something sharp is jabbed into me, and before I know it, everything turns black. Am I diseased now too? Am I a tortured soul? Am I dead?

  I open my eyes, and blink several times trying to focus.

  I try to move my arms, but they’re stuck.

  Panic fills me. My wrists are tied to the wall with heavy chains. I’m kneeling, and hurting. “Hello!” I yell. “Where am I?” My heart rate is at an all-time high. I’ve never felt so scared. Not even when…

  Wait, did I make it beyond the wall? Did I really see all the diseased? Am I dead? Is this where the dead go? Do we become chained to the wall? Why am I alone? Are there others?

  “Help!” I scream even louder.

  “Luna,” Elder Steven enters the room from a door opposite to where I’m kneeling. My knees are blistering in hot pain, and my back is protesting too.

  “Why am I here? Why can’t I move?” I ask as I try to tug at the chains around my wrists.

  Elder Steven shakes his head at me. His mouth is pressed into a thin, angry line. “Why did you leave, Luna?” His voice is low, reminding me of the time he caught Cain trying to teach me to read.

  “I..I…” I stumble with my words. I’m not too sure what I can say that won’t earn me a whipping. But, I’m also bound by chains to hooks on the wall, unable to move. I think a whipping is the least of my worries.

  Elder Steven walks toward me. He comes to stand in front of me. Because I’m kneeling, he towers over me. The tops of his legs are at my eye-level. “Don’t lie to me, Luna. I don’t like girls who lie.” He reaches out, and gently strokes my chin. I move my head away, because I know, he’s not gentle. He’s horrible and mean.

  I can’t help but notice there are no windows in here. “Where am I?” I ask, still looking everywhere but at Elder Steven.

  “You’re home, Luna.”

  “I’ve never seen this room.”

  Elder Steven laughs. “This is my room of enjoyment,” he says in a whisper. The hair on my arms raises, and my skin crawls when he says the word ‘enjoyment.’ “Do you want to see what I find enjoyable?”

  No, I don’t. I can’t seem to find my voice. All I can do is shake my head.

  The shock of what happens next startles me at first, then blinding pain screams at me. My cheek feels like it’s exploding with hot coals from an open fire. “No!” I cry as the pain rips through my head.

  “Yes,” he murmurs, and hits me on the side. The pain is matching. Matching and intolerable.

  “Stop!” I cry louder. “Help me.”

  “No one can hear you in here, Luna. This room is specially designed so I can have my fun without disturbing anyone. Aren’t you having fun? I am.”

  He smacks me again, and this time my cheek feels like it’s shattered. “Why are you doing this?” I try and escape, but I’m restrained and I can’t even shelter my head from the blows.

  “Tell me you’re having fun.” He hits me again.

  The impact of this strike makes me bite the inside of my cheek. There is a metallic taste in my mouth. The blows to my face are screwing with my head. The pain is like a pounding headache that doesn’t let up. “Stop!” I plead with him.

  He stops, and paces in front of me. “You should know, Luna, I don’t like it when girls try to run away.”

  “I wasn’t,” I instantly respond. “I just wanted to see what it was like out there.”

  “Don’t lie,” he angrily shouts, then adds another slap to the side of my head. This one makes me dizzy. “Why were you trying to run away? Don’t we give you the world here?”

  The world? The world? I look up at him. “The world?” I ask. He stares down at me, and his eyes widen, as if I’ve caught him doing something he shouldn’t. “There’s more beyond the wall?”

  He blinks at me. Caught. But he quickly morphs into angry Elder Steven again. “No, there’s nothing out there.” He lays a swift kick into my stomach.

  I try to double over in pain, but the chains won’t let me. The kick to my stomach winds me, and I try to drag air into my lungs. But everything inside my chest is burning in agony. “There’s more, isn’t there?” He hits me on the side of the head. But I refuse to give up. I want to know. “Tell me.” Another kick to my stomach.

  My body is refusing to co-operate. It’s giving up. But I will not die without knowing the truth.

  “We are your world. Your universe. Your everything.”

  Smack.

  “TELL ME!” I yell through gritted teeth. “There’s more beyond the wall, isn’t there?”

  Smack. “We are your world.” Smack. Kick.

  As Elder Steven continues the beating, the door creaks open, and Elder William enters. “Enough, Steven,” he says. Elder Steven turns, smirks at him, then hits me again. “She’s just a child. That’s enough,” Elder William says more sternly.

  “She broke the rules.”

  “She’s a child. You can do what you want with her once she becomes your bride.”

  “I’m not marrying him,” I say loud enough for them both to hear. My body is hurting. My wrists are burning in pain from where I’m tied, my stomach aches from the kicks, and my eyes are swelling shut.

  “It’s cute you think you have a choice,” Elder Steven replies.

  “Steven,” Elder William snaps. “Go.” He pointedly looks toward the door.

  Elder Steven steps back from me, then spits on the floor right by my knee. He moves his thumb, and wipes the spittle from his lips. “You and I are not done. Not yet.” Turning, he leaves the room. The thick door to the room closes, making a soft noise as it latches shut.

  “Luna, why did you leave?” Elder William asks in a gentle voice.

  I tilt my head at him so I can see him out of the slits my swollen eyes have become. He’s being nice to me, but an Elder who can watch another beat someone can’t be nice at all. It’s all lies. Everything they are is a lie. I shake my head at him. “What does it matter?” I try to shrug, but the blazing sting makes me whimper in pain.

  “It matters to me,” he says.

  “Why?” Although I’m the one restrained, I still feel strong. I know something they don’t want me to know. I know there’s more than they’ve been telling us.

  “Because I need to know the knowledge you have, about…” he pauses and walks around the small room, then stops near the door before finishing, “… outside.”

  So many things go through my head. I’m dangerous. I know something he’s desperately tried to keep from us. I just need to work out what that something is.

  “It doesn’t matter,” I say again, this time stronger than before. But a thought enters my mind, and I can’t help but to ask. I narrow my eyes and tilt my head.

  I see the worry on Elder William’s face. “What?” he asks, his tone filled with bother.

  “How did you find me?”

  He smiles, and steps back from me. “When we realized, you were missing, we knew you had found your way out. And we knew, the diseased trees wouldn’t have kept you in. Elder Steven went looking for you. He found the hole you dug, and knew you were gone. He figured out how you got out, and went searching for you. He was close behind, close enough to get to you before anyone even realized you were out.” I shake my head at myself. I was careless. That won’t ever happen again. “I was honest with you Luna, now I need to know, what you know about the outside.”

  I shake my head again. I’m not telling him anything. The silence is deafening. My body shakes with anger, but I will not tell him what he wants to know.

  “You leave us no choice, Luna.” He leaves through the door. In less than a heartbeat, a sound comes from somewhere.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you,” the female voice chants.

  “Hello?” I call.

  “We are your family. Be
yond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  “Who are you?” I can’t place the voice. It doesn’t sound like anyone I know.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  I listen to the voice. It’s the same every time she speaks, the same words. It’s deadly even, with no emotion in it.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  “Hello?” I say in a smaller voice.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.

  “STOP!” I scream.

  The same voice continues. Over and over and over again. It’s messing with my head, and I hate the voice. It’s so… lifeless.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.

  “STOP!” I yell again.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you..”

  I don’t know how much longer the voice keeps saying the same thing.

  My head is pounding. My body is aching. And I can’t move.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you. We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  Eventually my eyes drift closed, and a curtain of darkness falls over me.

  The female voice is close. It doesn’t stop. The words don’t stop, “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  We are your family.

  Beyond the wall is death.

  Beyond the wall is evil.

  You will die if you leave.

  Only we can protect you.

  If this is protecting me, I don’t want it.

  My eyes open. My body is throbbing. The voice is still playing, still reciting the same words. I try to turn, but now, even my neck is sore.

  “You’re awake,” another voice says. Elder Steven. “I was worried.”

  I search for him, but can’t see where he is. My vision is blurry, it’s difficult to focus because I can barely open my eyes. His work. “Worried?” I chuckle. “That’s why you have me here. Tied? Because you’re worried about me?”

  “You haven’t been listening, have you? We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you,” he repeats the words with confidence.

  “Sounds like you believe the words.”

  “You’ll learn to believe them too. You just need extra convincing. And this is why I like you so much, Luna. You have fire and spirit, and I want to be the one who breaks it out of you.” He comes into view, standing tall before me.

  “Is that the enjoyment you told me about? You like to break girls?” Although I still don’t know exactly what that means, I’m quickly learning to interpret what he’s saying. There’s another meaning to break, I’m just not sure what it means yet. He tried to break me with the punches, kicks and slaps.

  “I’ve never met anyone like you before.” He grabs my chin in his hand, and rubs his thumb over my lip. “And you’ll learn exactly how much enjoyment I will take from you.”

  “Why wait? Why don’t you take your enjoyment from me now?”

  He laughs. “Believe me, I’ve thought about it. But William would have my head if I touch you before you come of age.”

  The more he talks, the more questions I have. But I can barely keep my head up from all the pain. “I’m hungry,” I say.

  “You think I’m going to feed you? That’s not going to happen. Not until you admit, we are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  I smirk. “Is that what you want to hear?” I feel the strength inside me increasing.

  “I want you to believe it.”

  “Then you’ll be waiting for many moons,” I retort.

  “And you’ll be hungry.”

  I glare at him the best I can. “I’d rather die.”

  Elder Steven’s eyes narrow at me. A muscle in his neck tenses, and his hands become fists. He takes a breath, and steps backward until his back is against the wall. “I can arrange that, too. Truthfully, I’d enjoy it.”

  “Why are you doing this?” I ask.

  “Because you need to learn we are your family.”

  I shake my head. “No. Family doesn’t do this to each other.” I rattle the chains, indicating how I’m shackled. “You’re not my family.” You never will be.

  A slow grin pulls at his lips. “Oh yes, I’m going to enjoy this very much.” With those words, he leaves the room.

  The voice starts again.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  Elder Steven’s smirk worries me. I know something’s going to happen. I’m not entirely sure on what that something is, but I have an awful feeling I won’t have to wait for long.

  The voice continues.

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  My stomach churns with a combination of worry and hunger; they compete with each other. Both are strong, but I think worry may be a stronger reaction than hunger.

  “Help!” I try to scream, but my throat is too dry. I have a feeling screaming and yelling won’t achieve anything. I can’t imagine the Elders have brought me to a place where someone can hear me, and come in to help me. I’m somewhere they can do what they want with me, and no one will know anything about it.

  It makes me think. How many others have they done this to? How many haven’t made it out alive?

  “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  The door opens.

  Elder William walks in first, and holds the door open.

  There’s a repetitive sound I can hear above the voice, a squeaking noise. “Are you sure?” Elder William asks.

  It doesn’t take too long to see where the squeaky sound is coming from. There’s a bathtub on wheels being pushed into the room. Water sloshes up the edges and out of the bath, splashing to the floor. Elder Steven pushes it into the room.

  I feel my forehead crinkle in question. He’s going to give me a bath? But the tub is high up off the floor. How am I supposed to get in it?

  “I’m sure,” Elder Steven replies and gives Elder William a wink and a smile. Though both seem quite sinister. Maybe, this isn’t a bath.

  Behind him, Momma Edith enters carrying a bucket in each hand, and pours them into the bath. She looks at me, frowns, and shakes her head. “We are your family,” she says. “Remember this. Only we can protect you.” She leaves and Elder William follows.r />
  Before Elder William closes the door, he says to Elder Steven, “Don’t take it too far.”

  Momma Edith enters with the same buckets, and empties them again. She leaves quickly without even glancing at me.

  I flick my gaze back to Elder Steven who’s standing in front of me, smiling. “I won’t. She just needs to learn. When she understands, I’ll stop.”

  “She’s still a child.”

  “She’ll be legal soon. And no one even knows she’s here.”

  “Just don’t take it too far,” Elder William says again, in a lower, more serious voice.

  “I won’t.”

  Elder William departs the room. The door closing behind him.

  Now, I’m terrified. I’m not sure what’s going to happen. The look on Elder Steven’s face tells me he’s going to enjoy it, which means I won’t.

  “You know, Luna. I think we’re way past the Elder-girl relationship now.”

  I squint. What does he mean? I don’t dare ask.

  “I’m going to untie you.” He walks to my side, produces something small and silver, and unlocks the shackles on my wrists, then steps around and repeats it on the other side. I rub at my wrists where the cuffs cut into me, and notice the angry red, circular marks. “But this, this is going to be the highlight of my year.”

  He lifts me by my shoulders. My legs cramp from being on my knees for so long. “My legs,” I cry as I try to massage the back of them. I can barely feel my feet. They tingle as I try to stand.

  “Your legs will be the least of your worries soon.” He grabs the back of my neck, squeezes, and pulls me along to the bath. He dunks my head into the water, I try to scream and fight him. As I inhale, I take in water, unable to catch my breath because my head is held under.

  He lifts my head, and I try to suck air into my lungs. “Stop!” I manage to splutter.

  The voice plays in the background. “We are your family. Beyond the wall is death. Beyond the wall is evil. You will die if you leave. Only we can protect you.”

  He dunks my head straight under the water again. I barely got the chance to get air into my lungs. I’m trying to fight him, clawing at his arms to let me up. I try to scream again, but I’m only taking in more water. My body is in agony, my chest is exploding with fire and sizzling pain.