The Haunting of Josiah Kash

by Dana Pratola

  My thoughts tracked so far from the page, she might as well be reading a grocery receipt. I couldn’t follow the story, just the movement of her mouth as she formed the syllables, and the tiny creases that came and went as her eyebrows expounded on the emotions she read. Once she paused to ask me if she was going too fast, and I could only shake my head until my brain sorted through the words a few seconds later.

  This was not supposed to be happening. Not now. Not to me. I had no business becoming emotionally involved with Brenna, especially with her staying here. Thirty minutes into her reading, I stopped her.

  “You’re probably tired,” I said. She blinked up from the page. “You’ve been reading a long time. I don’t want to burn you out. We can pick it up tomorrow.”

  “I’m fine,” she said. “I had no idea there used to be so many Cherokee and Creek right on this mountain. And I want to get to the chapter on the Wagoner house. I’m really getting into it.”

  Yes, me too, which was why we had to stop. “I’m starting to get sleepy,” I said, with a manufactured yawn. “And sitting up this long is doing a number on my back.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry,” she said, concerned.

  “I’m fine, I just think we should break.”

  “Okay.” She stuck her finger in the book, looking around the room. “Do you have a bookmark?”

  “Can’t you just dogear it?”

  “I don’t like to. Though I see you already have.” She bent the page with a look of sympathy for the book, or the author, and stood.

  “Okay, where do you want to sleep?” I didn’t miss the startled face my wording produced, but went on. “You’ll have your own place tomorrow. For tonight you can have the second bedroom upstairs, or set yourself up here on the couch.”

  “Oh, uh, I’ll be fine here,” she said, flinging a hand out toward the couch.

  “You sure?”

  “Yup.”

  “I think you’re going to like the cabin,” I said. “It’s not a shack or anything. It’s rustic, but has everything you need, move-in ready. Electricity, water, heat, WIFI.”

  She smirked. “I don’t own anything that uses WIFI.”

  “Well, it also has newer appliances. For privacy it’s the best place to be.”

  She smirked. “You know, I’m not a hermit. I enjoy people.”

  It was hard to remember that, when I’d found her alone, fending for herself like a stray cat. “Right.”

  “Speaking of that, I want to give you my first month’s rent tomorrow. I’ll stop at the bank before work.”

  “You don’t have to do that.” I saw something swirling in her eyes. Maybe suspicion. Maybe she thought I had another way in mind for her to pay. I averted my eyes to a spot on the wall behind her. “But whatever is easiest for you. You can take the white truck; go wherever you need to go. You drive stick?”

  “Of course,” she answered, like the question was absurd. She took a step toward me, looking up at me with an odd expression, then moved past me and turned again to look at me. “Why are you doing this?”

  Her voice held no accusation, only genuine curiosity, but I felt I should reiterate my earlier answer just to clear the air. I reached toward her and she readily put her hands in mine.

  “I told you, I know all about needing help and you were here for me when I needed it. Now I’m asking you to let me help you. I do like you, but I’m not trying to seduce you or use you, Brenna.”

  “Oh, I know.”

  “And I won’t betray your trust.”

  I wanted so much to bask in her blossoming smile. Once she knew I had my vision I would be able to. Tomorrow. I would wake up with my sight, ending this senseless charade. She was already here and once she had her own place there would be no reason for her to leave.

  “Can I ask another question?” she asked. I nodded. “Why is Tory under the impression I’ll be working here?”

  “I guess she assumed because you’ll be staying here and there isn’t anything else for miles. Tracy’s position is still open,” I added. For some reason that sounded sexual and I cleared my throat. “You know, public relations.”

  “Not just employer relations?” she asked.

  It was subtle, but I was pretty sure I heard humor in there. She confirmed it when the corner of her mouth kicked up. I laughed. “Ah, well, we’re not going to be discussing it. That was a two-year error in judgement and thankfully it’s over.”

  “Two years.” She shook her head slowly. “Why?”

  “She was good.” Brenna’s brows shot up and I realized how wrong that sounded. What was wrong with me? “At her job,” I added quickly. “With people. Personable. And good with the social media pages, website, you know.”

  “Hmm.” Her eyes narrowed a bit now.

  “Truth is I would’ve broken up with her sooner if I hadn’t been too lazy to hire someone else. I think you would be a good fit. Since you like people.”

  “So … you broke up with her?”

  In my heart and head, yes, a long time ago. However, that wasn’t the way it had played out. “Ah, well … when I lost my sight, it became clear she wouldn’t be here for me.”

  She gave a quiet gasp. “What a…. That’s when you need her most.”

  Afraid she might take our breakup synopsis as meaning I regretted her departure, I thought I should clarify. However, to do so might make her feel I only used Tracy, for work … and other things.

  “She didn’t see it that way. Honestly, I don’t want to talk about Tracy at all. Do you mind?”

  She shrugged and returned the book to its slot in the bookcase. “Where do I find blankets? For the couch.”

  “The closet in the guest room,” I said. “If you’re sure you don’t want to just stay there.”

  “No, I think the couch will be fine. It’s so comfortable.”

  Yes, I’d spent many a night on it. Rather than make things awkward, I let her guide me upstairs and told her where to find linens and a pillow.

  “If you need anything, just let me know,” I said. “Otherwise I’ll see you in the morning.”

  She studied me another few seconds. I wished I could look directly into her eyes and try to read what she might be thinking. I skimmed her face a couple times.

  “Thank you, Josiah. You’ll never know what your kindness means to me.”

  She walked away and I closed my bedroom door.

  CHAPTER 22

  I expected to find her awake when I came down in the morning, but there she was asleep on the couch, her body cocooned in a fluffy blanket, only her head exposed to the day. I didn’t know how she slept through the glare of the sun in her face, but I was glad she did, allowing me to look at her a little longer.

  What an odd girl. Sweet and compassionate, yet she’d had some lousy breaks that had landed her here. In this moment, however, I was grateful for those lousy breaks. Though even now my ego tried to convince me I was a genuinely wonderful person who would be as interested in her no matter her looks—I knew that probably wasn’t the case—I still couldn’t deny feeling a connection with her even before.

  She lifted her chin a little causing a long lock to fall over her face. She’d described her hair as brown. It was so much more, as the sun’s rays picked out certain strands, making spectacles of their reddish gold tones. A riot of color, rich and warm.

  Her nose twitched. Another sign she would be waking soon. I walked quietly toward the window to close the drapes, intending to get the sun out of her eyes, then caught myself. How would a blind man have any idea the sun shone in her face?

  I hated having to be aware of those things and knew I had to tell her that I had my sight back. Today. When she woke. I had awoken in the world of sight on Tuesday, so I would just tell her it happened this morning.

  My mind worked, framing a scene in my mind where I came running downstairs elated, grabbing Brenna up in a hug and spinning her around, celebrating my miracle…. Then my phone rang in my pocket, startling her awake.

&
nbsp; Her eyes popped open to find me standing there, like some kind of pervert caught panting over her. No, that was my guilt projecting. She wouldn’t think that at all. Because I was blind. Still.

  As she sat up, I fumbled for my phone, letting my eyes wander the room, clueless.

  “Oh, Josiah. What time is it? Did I oversleep?”

  “I’m not sure,” I lied, and held the phone out. “Can you tell me who it is?”

  “Looks like it’s Eliza. May I?” I nodded. “Hello…. You just woke me up,” she told her friend. “Yeah, I know, I haven’t slept this well in a long—wait, what time is it?”

  I heard Eliza’s voice through the tiny speaker, watching out of the corner of my eye as Brenna’s shoulders sagged with relief.

  “Oh, okay, I thought I was late. I forgot to set an alarm or anything.” She glanced at me from the corner of her eye. “I’m fine,” she said, and paused. “No, I can’t talk now.” Then sent me an odd look. “I can’t.” Another pause. “Look, I’ll see you at lunch … no.”

  My presence was obviously stifling their conversation, so I backed away. “I forgot something. I’ll be back.” I went up the stairs, stopping at the top out of view, straining my ears to listen in.

  “I can’t talk, he’s here,” Brenna said, voice lowered. “No, he hasn’t tried anything. He’s blind, El, what’s he going to do?”

  There was a longer pause, accentuated by a couple mm hmm’s, until I heard this: “I couldn’t refuse, he’s handicapped. …yes, he has people here, but from what I’ve seen there’s a kind of disconnect. Well maybe disconnect isn’t the right word. His employees care for him, I just don’t know if they’re the kinds of friends he needs helping him out.”

  She mm hmmed again.

  “I know, I sound like I’m judging and I don’t mean it that way,” she went on. “What I mean to say is he should have someone helping him who really cares. Not like a nurse, like family. There’s his friend, Ben, but he can’t be here.”

  Pity. Another pause as I recovered from the punch to my gut.

  “Well let me go get ready. No, he’s loaning me a truck. See you later.”

  I started back down the stairs as she walked toward them.

  “Here’s your phone. Thanks.” She placed it in my hand.

  “Checking in, huh?” I asked. “It’s good having a friend like that.”

  “Yes.” She gave me an odd look. “You shaved.”

  Reflex had me rubbing my chin. I’d neatened up a little, not shaved completely, having decided to let my facial hair grow in a little. Should have remembered I wouldn’t be able to manage that without sight. “Yeah. Took me forever. It must look pretty bad.”

  She came up to inspect me, and of course I had to pretend I had no idea. Even when she closed her eyes and inhaled. As did I, surreptitiously. Her hair smelled as nice as it had last night. Finally, she took one step in retreat.

  “Looks like a great job. Pretty impressive.”

  I dropped my hand. “I’ve been shaving a long time. Second nature. You hungry?”

  “Sure am. Mind if I shower?”

  An image of her in a towel came to mind. “Go ahead. I’ll find us something to eat.”

  *****

  I parked Josiah’s truck in view across the street from my job. I’d never been responsible for someone else’s vehicle and I was glad this one already had dents and scrapes from use. At least if I did something stupid, it might not be noticed. Though I’d confess anyway, who was I kidding?

  I couldn’t even believe he let me use it. Who did that? For all he knew, I could be a fugitive of justice, wanted for … anything at all, and he’d loaned me a truck to escape in. All he had was my word.

  The bells over the door drowned out my sigh, as Eliza strolled in with a plastic bag of take-out containers smelling of fried onions.

  “Delivery!” She set the bag on the counter and immediately handed out the contents.

  “What’s this? I thought we were going to the diner?”

  “I had the diner come here,” she said. “Quicker. I came in late so my boss took the time off my lunch hour.”

  “Ah.” She’d ordered me a burger deluxe with onion rings, and a salad for herself. “Salad again?”

  “My date is tomorrow. I’ve been eating better.”

  “You should be eating better anyway, not for a guy,” I reminded her.

  “I know, I know.” She stabbed a pile of purple and green leaves with her black plastic fork. “It’s not for him though, he’s just the motivation that got me on track.”

  Unconvinced, I bit into my burger.

  “So…?”

  I swallowed. “So what?”

  “How’d it go on the ranch?’

  Just the simple idea of Josiah made my heart happy. I guess it shone on my face. Eliza didn’t miss it.

  “I’m dying to see what this guy looks like.”

  I waved a hand at her. “That doesn’t matter. It has nothing to do with how good-looking he is.”

  “Uh, I don’t know if I believe that,” she said, dangling the fork from her fingertips. “Would you have gone off with the guy if he was ugly?’

  “I didn’t just go off with him. His friend, Ben, drove.”

  “Answer the question,” she insisted, with a giggle.

  “Well … if he looked like a serial killer or something, of course not.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Come on, Bren, what’s he like? You told me he’s nice, what’s he look like?”

  I gave a quick huff and shot the words out to get it over with. “Six-foot, brown eyes, brown hair, nice body.”

  She paused narrowing her eyes. “Nice body. What’s that mean?”

  “Like….” I flagged my hands around, flustered. “Like a cowboy. You know how they’re built.”

  “Come on, both our families are cowboys. You know as well as me some are built like cows; some are built like calendar cowboys. Which is he?”

  I hated to say it…. “The second.”

  She stuffed her mouth full of foliage, not waiting to swallow before pointing at me with her fork, giving me a muffled, “I knew it!”

  I was already shaking my head. “I told you it’s not like that.” I pushed my food to the side. “Neither of us are thinking along those lines, I assure you. We’re both just having a hard time and we found each other. I guess God brought us into one another’s lives for … support.”

  “Maybe,” she said.

  I didn’t like the sound of it. “What’s that mean?”

  She wasted no time hedging. “It means maybe. Could be God, then again, it could be you. You’re always looking to be someone’s solution. You put yourself out there way too much.”

  “So what if I do?”

  “There’s nothing wrong with it, necessarily, if you don’t let it go too far. There is such a thing as being too helpful. You aren’t his savior.”

  “Of course not. Anyway, he’s helping me more than I’m helping him.”

  “Okay, let’s ask this question. Why? Don’t you want to know? Is it just to be nice? Or is there more to it?”

  “What more can he want?”

  “Maybe he wants someone to be his companion. To take care of him.”

  “He has people there.”

  “You said yourself they’re not the right kind of help, which tells me you think you are.”

  I sighed and rolled my eyes.

  “Look, Bren, you can’t tie yourself up in this guy’s life. If he owns that ranch, he has money, he can afford a nurse or service dog or whatever. I’m just saying, don’t make his burden yours.”

  I wondered. I had taken care of him in a sense in what must surely have been the worst time of his life. That could promote bonds—even false bonds. Was that all this was on my side? What about on his? Could he just be looking for a replacement buddy? Or a replacement Tracy?

  No, I wouldn’t entertain that idea.

  “I’m not. I’m just saying I don’t mind helping him out whi
le I’m there. He’s done more for me than I can repay.” I pointed toward the street. “He loaned me his truck, and he’s going to put me up in a cabin of my own. I’ve never had my own private place.”

  “You’re falling for him,” Eliza said simply, and shoved another forkful of salad between her teeth.

  “No, I can’t do that. That would be the worst thing. It’s not what this is anyway,” I said, confidently. “He feels as bad for me as I do for him, that’s all.”

  Her left eyebrow rose to mock me. Could I blame her? No, but I didn’t have to like it. After a couple seconds, she changed the topic to Charles and their date tomorrow, finishing her lunch then ducking out in a hurry to get back to work. I thanked God for a friend like Eliza, I did, but she needn’t worry.

  *****

  The number looked familiar. Brenna’s friend? Since I assumed she would know Brenna was at work, it made me nervous to speculate why she might be calling. To tell me something had happened? Was Brenna all right? Then again, maybe Brenna was using Eliza’s phone to call me.

  “Hello.”

  “Is this Josiah?” asked the female voice, clipped and irritated.

  Not Brenna. My heart fell to my stomach with dread. “Yes.”

  “This is her friend, Eliza.”

  I braced myself for tragic news, a number of scenarios overloading my mind. Crashing, flipping, flames. Brenna was in the hospital for one reason or other. Though maybe not. Maybe she was missing. Whoa, where had that all come from?

  “Okay….”

  “I don’t have a lot of time, I’m at work. I just want to tell you, you better be on the up and up with her. She’s a great person—maybe the best person I know—and if you hurt her, I’ll kick you in the throat, blind or not.”

  I pulled the phone away for a quick glance, as if it might somehow clear up why I was being threatened. Nope. “What’s this about?”

  “Look, I appreciate you taking her in—I do—but she really likes you and if you don’t feel the same, you better cut it off now.”

  “What?” I wasn’t sure I’d heard right, or that she’d meant it the way it sounded.