Truth or Lies?

by A. Gomez

  I headed to my mother’s room and noticed Ben and Charlie were still watching the game. I smirked inwardly knowing Ben was feeling a little too awkward to be around me right now, which made all my getting ready that much easier. I walked in my mother’s room and began to tell her our plans.

  She looked at me, blinking. “Honey, why not just tell the truth or just go see him without saying anything? What is Ben going to do…block your entrance?”

  “I thought of that, Mom, but what if I get him in trouble? Or worse yet, what if they send him some place where he or I can’t communicate with one another?” I continued, “I’m not willing to take that chance. Besides, pretty soon, we’ll be on our way to Dallas and I won’t get to see Josh for who knows how long… if at all, so this will be my only opportunity to thank him for taking such good care of me and to say goodbye.”

  She looked at me, expressionless, probably processing what I said, then answered, “Of course I’ll help you, honey, but I doubt Ben or anyone else will come to me wanting to fish.”

  “Yeah, I agree. I just don’t want you to be caught off guard that’s all. Anyhow, Charles Andrew said he needs to get to Dad’s jet by five in the morning, so we’re planning on leaving when he leaves so we can get to the hospital before the doctors start their rounds.”

  “All right, sweetheart. Should I join you so I can keep Ben company while you pretend to get a mammogram?”

  Then it hit me. She should absolutely come and keep his mind preoccupied.

  “That’s a great idea, Mom! Come with us so you can talk his ear off and get coffee. You can keep him preoccupied so his mind doesn’t start to wander. You’re fantastic at getting people to open up to you.”

  She snickered, “Oh, my, honey… I don’t know if I’m any good at that. Remember, Ben also has a background in medicine. I’m not confident he can be manipulated in that way.”

  I filled my cheeks up with air and blew out, “Well, he’s a man, regardless of his background. I’m pretty confident he’s going to question us about if we’re really getting a mammo. Besides, if he did we could just say it’s none of his business.”

  She pursed her lips. “You got me. Okay, I’ll try.” She gave me a kiss on the cheek and added, “I’ll be ready to go by four fifteen tomorrow morning. I can put your brother in an Uber and then we can all leave.”

  “Great! Thanks, Mom.”

  I left for my room. The television was off and I could see Charlie getting the sofa ready for bed. Ben was nowhere in sight. Maybe he was walking around the house securing things or checking in with the other team. I didn’t put too much thought into it. I needed to get ready for bed. I looked at the clock. It’s been roughly about forty minutes since I last saw Ben. Hm, I wonder if he’s in the kitchen getting more to eat? Belín walked in, getting ready for bed as well.

  “Belín, where did Ben run off to? Is he getting more food?”

  “No,” she began, “he’s waiting for me in the basement. He does his check around your house and then we usually meet in your basement so we can have a few moments alone together.” She said it so nonchalantly.

  “Wait. What?” I couldn’t believe my ears. “Y’all do what?” I was staring at her stupefied. “How long has this been going on? Does my mother or Charlie know? Can anyone hear you two down there?”

  “Well, if they can they haven’t said anything.” She looked at me out of the corner of her eye. “I know we just met but it just happened one night. He was walking around your house securing everything, I was already in the basement doing laundry, he heard noises coming from the basement so he came to investigate, and we started talking. No one ever knew we were both there,” she said. “I hope that’s okay. He never drinks, I’m the only one drinking wine and we never stay longer than thirty minutes.”

  I was smiling like a fool at this point. “Of course that’s okay!” I exclaimed. “I’m glad you and he are able to find alone time. I would’ve never suspected.”

  “That is our intention, you know—for no one to suspect. Yet,” she declared, “Ben said the agency already has a problem with how Josh is behaving… but he never alluded to the fact that it’s over you… and so, if anyone knew about him and me, he would most certainly be taken off this case.”

  “Well, at least one of us is happy in a relationship,” I said.

  “It’s not much of a relationship or anything, I don’t think,” she replied. “We both know I’m going back to Spain after I’m finished in Dallas.” She paused, “Also, how can I possibly have a relationship with anyone? I’m always chasing the next story so that means I’m never at home. I can’t even have fish as pets; they will die,” she said with chagrin in her voice. “If I have any kind of relationship with a man it will just be sexual and I don’t want that.”

  “Belín, just be in the moment for now. Ben is a good guy. Whenever it’s time to go home, worry about it then, not now.” I took her hands and held them as I told her, “Go be with him.” She kissed my cheek and left to meet Ben.

  I brushed my teeth with my good arm and got into bed. Four in the morning could not come soon enough for me. I was antsy with anticipation. All I could think about was Josh and how awful I had behaved with him. Belín said he was the epitome of a man in love but that didn’t mean he’d forgive me or even want to see me. There was a time I was in love with David but I knew all he brought with him was pain and heartache, so I did my best to avoid him. Would it be that way for Josh? All I had to do was listen to him with an open mind. I could’ve gone, at the very least, to see him after his surgery, to see if he was fine and thank him for taking care of me. He must hate me on some level, or think I’m the worst kind of ungrateful person. I had to try. I left the bathroom light on for Belín. It was late, bed time, I told myself.

  I couldn’t sleep. I just lay in bed looking at the clock and at times my drapes where the streetlights would peek through. It was two in the morning and Belín was still with Ben. I sighed deeply, wishing I could leave now and go to Josh. Belín and Ben were otherwise busy. I could sneak out and be back before Charlie had to leave. But if I got caught I could potentially hurt Josh. Better not…I needed to stop thinking and acting like an adolescent.

  I rolled over, closing my eyes, trying my best to sleep. Then I heard the door crack. I opened my eyes and saw that it was Ben and Belín coming in together. He gave her a long and romantic goodnight kiss. I felt a pang of jealousy. They just had their surreptitious date and he walked her to her door, as odd as that sounds given the circumstances. I pretended to be asleep so as to give them their privacy. Ben quickly left and Belín just stood there facing the door with her forehead leaning against it.

  “Hey,” I said in a low voice, “what’s the matter?”

  She jumped, startled. “Why are you still awake?”

  “I can’t sleep. Too worried about what Josh will do or say.” I sat up, “So, why do you look so pensive?”

  “Because I am,” she sighed. “Ben is the perfect man and…”

  “I beg to differ but go on,” I said, cutting her off.

  “Ha, yes, I’m sure you disagree, but nonetheless, he is the perfect man and I find myself thinking of the future. My future. Our future,” she said. She didn’t finish her thought. I guessed she had finally found someone that was making her question if she should chase the next story or not. She scurried off to the bathroom.

  17

  The noise of the rushing water must have lulled me to sleep because the next thing I knew Belín was waking me up so I could get ready to leave. I looked at the clock—three-fifty, in the morning. I jumped up and rushed to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror in a daze, not knowing what to do first. My head felt so groggy and my arm felt like it had been shot. Belín walked out of my closet with my clothes.

  “Isa, brush your teeth and wash your face,” she ordered. “We won’t look anything alike if you can’t help yourself.”

  I quickly did as she said. She handed me my clothes. I put them on a littl
e too slow, in her opinion, since I could see her rolling her eyes out of the corner of my eye.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “My arm still hurts.”

  “It’s fine,” she answered. “Your press powder and blush are on your vanity. I already put mine on. I just need to put my hair in a ponytail.”

  I finished applying the press powder and blush—now for the hard part—lifting my arm so I could put my hair in a ponytail. I brushed my hair with my good arm first, to get it nice and smooth. I looked over at Belín to make sure my hair matched hers, and it did. I took a deep breath and exhaled as I started to pull my hair up and back. The pain shot through my arm as if someone set it on fire. If I wasn’t awake before, I was now. Once done, we stood side by side, facing the mirror, looking at each other and ourselves.

  “Not bad,” I said. “I hope this works.”

  “It will work fine, Isa. Have a little faith.”

  “Yup, it’ll work,” I said nervously. “Just don’t smile since you don’t have a dimple and I do.”

  We grabbed our purses and my work tote and headed to the living room. I saw my mother walking back in the house with Samson. She had just finished letting Samson back in and feeding him. My stomach was in knots. I looked at Belín as she was getting her jacket on. She didn’t react. My mother noticed my nerves, walked over to me and whispered, “I’ve got this, honey.”

  “Good morning, Ben,” my mother chimed cheerily. “I do hope you were able to sleep just a little.”

  Ben had walked in from the kitchen. “Good morning, yes, I was able to get a power nap.” He paused, staring at all of us. “What’s going on? Why is everyone up and ready to leave?”

  “Didn’t Isabel Grace let you know?” She was getting her purse and tying her coat. “The girls have mammograms this morning. It’s sort of a family tradition,” she said, smiling. “Every year on our birthdays we each get mammograms and have our well woman exams. You see, breast cancer runs on my side of the family and this year is extra special because Belín is here with us so I told Isabel Grace to schedule one for her as well, since her birthday is in February and who knows if she’ll be on another assignment.” She added, “Better now than never.”

  Holy shit! My mother can lie! It was rolling off her tongue like turpentine. My dad’s in trouble—she’s good.

  “Oh…uh.” Ben eyed Belín. Probably thinking “Why didn’t you tell me while we were together last night?” “Let me get my holster on and my jacket then.”

  “Perfect, we’ll wait for you right here,” she said.

  Neither Belín nor I said anything at all. We just looked at my mother, impressed.

  “Uh, Dr. Langley, why is this mammogram so early in the morning, if you don’t mind me asking?” Ben was walking toward us putting on his suit jacket.

  “Not at all,” my mother answered. “Well, we’re kind of cheating. Belín doesn’t have any insurance that’s good here in the States so I called an old friend from graduate school, who’s on the board at Cook County Hospital, and he arranged for the girls to come in extra early, before the department has their first appointment and have it done then.” She turned to face him, saying, “You won’t give us away, will you? This could have bad repercussions for my friend and me.”

  “Of course not, Dr. Langley,” he replied.

  We piled into my car and headed to the hospital. I leaned my head against the cool glass, closing my eyes, pretending to sleep while Ben drove. We pulled in the garage and parked. I looked at my watch; it was five in the morning, right on schedule. My heart beat faster. I told Belín, in Spanish, to stand in front of me in the elevator so I could hide behind her, just in case someone from the ER got in with us. We made it to the breast cancer floor without any glitches. I felt some relief that we were almost there. I led the way to the room, realizing I was walking a little too fast. My mother once again noticed my nervous behavior and started a conversation with Ben.

  “So, Ben,” she began, “would you like to get coffee while we wait for the girls?”

  “You won’t be getting yours done today?” he asked.

  “Oh no, not me. I’m just here for moral support. My birthday is in May, so I’ll have mine done back home. And also, my well woman with my Ob/Gyn,” she offered. “I really won’t go to any other doctor for that, you know. I like my doctor and I trust her. I’m sure you can understand that, Ben…” My mother patted his arm, adding, “since you have a background in medicine. It’s very important for the patient to feel comfortable with her doctor.”

  “Yes, ma’am, I do,” he answered. “And yes, I’m sure it will be fine. I just need to make sure the area is secure and have a back-up agent.”

  “Wonderful! We can get coffee for that agent too,” she said.

  We walked in the waiting area, my mother took a seat while Ben secured the area. Belín and I went to the receptionist desk.

  “Brenda!” I gently yelled.

  A middle-aged, woman came out of one of the rooms, grinning at us. She has a motherly look to her and a very down to earth personality.

  “Hey!” Her sunny disposition put everyone at ease. “I haven’t seen you since your last visit. Is this your cousin from Spain? The journalist?”

  “Yes.” I introduced them, “Brenda, this is Belín and yes, she does speak English.”

  Everyone laughed. “I knew she had to speak a little English if she’s a journalist and following a story all the way here.” She waved for us to come back. “Well, come on in and let’s get started.”

  We went through the door and followed her to the very back. She took us to the emergency exit.

  “Doctor Langley, you have me lying through my teeth,” she complained, placing her hands on her hips. “One of these days you’re going to have to tell me what this is all about.”

  “I promise, one of these days I will.” I dug into my purse and pulled out two tickets to a basketball game. A birthday present I had received from an old colleague. They were good seats too. Too bad I don’t like basketball. “Brenda, these are for you and your hubby. I know lying goes against your nature and I don’t know how to thank you enough.”

  Her eyes grew wide with delight as she took the tickets. “Dr. Langley, you did not have to do this but I’m glad you did. Thank you!” she said with a huge smile.

  “No, thank you! And take care of my cousin while I’m gone.” I hugged Brenda and handed Belín my jacket.

  I raced down two flights of stairs, my adrenaline pumping. I got to the door and checked my watch. It was only five twenty, still on schedule. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. I told myself to calm down but it was no use. I opened the door and stepped out. I was frantically looking for his room, wondering if Belín gave me misinformation. The halls were empty and the lighting was still a little dim. I looked in the direction of the nurse’s station and saw only one nurse; she didn’t seem to notice me. I finally found his room and froze. My feet felt like lead. I was having trouble moving. My head was swimming with so many possibilities on how this visit could go that I started to panic.

  “Pull it together, Isabel,” I told myself. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that I had to try. I turned the handle, quietly walked in and locked the door behind me. His room was dark, just soft lighting running along the base of one of the walls, the only thing illuminating his room. I saw him sitting on his bed, his back to me and slouching. He was wearing the watch I bought him for his birthday. I could also see the cake my mother bought him sitting on the tray table. My heart was pounding. I was breathing heavy from running down the stairs. He heard me but only slightly turned his head, not enough to see it was me.

  “I don’t need help, nurse, I’m fine. You’ll be glad to hear I’ve already used the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I already told you I would make an effort.” His voice sounded hoarse yet it still had that sultriness I remembered.

  “I’m actually a doctor,” I answered timidly.

  His back and head straightened. “Isabel Grace?”
he croaked.

  I started walking toward him not knowing what to expect. “Yes?” I stood in front of him, gazing upon his perfect face, taking in his perfect features. His hair was messy and he had a thick stubble. My eyes flashed from the top of his head to his feet. He was wearing a hospital gown that looked like it was two sizes too small for his solid muscled build. He looked pale and consumed yet still muscular and intimidating. He seemed as if he were struggling just to sit up. Was his expression pain or rage? We held each other’s gaze for a long minute. His eyes looked tense and angry. Were they filled with hate and resentment toward me? His jaw was clenched with the same tension as his gaze. I noticed his hands were balled up into fists, causing the muscles in his forearms to flex and the veins pop out. Holy shit! The enmity he must have for me, I could only imagine. I didn’t know what to think.

  My heart was thumping louder. Tears started rolling down my cheeks. I raised my hand to touch his perfect face when he grabbed my wrist emphatically and twisted it. I said nothing; just continued to look at his beautiful face. He released it and grasped both my arms forcefully, staring into my eyes. I let out a soft cry, my expression twisting in response to the pain on my wounded arm. I deserved whatever pain I got for hurting him, I thought to myself. He loosened his grip and pulled me close into his chest, embracing me, burying his face in my neck. I hugged his neck and began to sob softly, getting his hair and neck wet with my tears. He held me closer and tighter, so tight it was hard to breathe. I couldn’t believe I was here. I couldn’t believe I was in his arms again. Did this mean he didn’t hate me?

  “Isabel,” he breathed. “Isabel, I didn’t know if I was ever going to see you again. Baby, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for not telling you everything.” His breathing was harsh. “You can’t ever leave me again, baby. I can’t live without you. I love you. I knew I loved you the minute I saw you step out of your car.” His voice was hoarse and cracking. “I knew then you had to be mine.”