Cactus of Mystery

by Ross Heaven

  A few days later I was sitting outside at the pool and my mom came running out to say that my father was calling for me. She looked scared and when I went in he was sitting up in bed with his arms outstretched and with huge eyes. He said, “Lesley, help me. There is a gate here and I need to go through it but I don’t know how, but I know that you know how! Help me.”

  I was very panicky and had no idea how to get him through the gate so I prayed and asked that God speak for me and I thanked him in advance for it being so.

  I said, “Dad, do you see people on the other side of the gate?” He looked and said, “Yes! I see my mother, my father, and all my brothers! Please get me to them.”

  I then said, “Do you see Michael on this side of the gate?” (My thoughts were, “Oh no! Who is Michael? I have no idea. Please don’t ask me Dad!”) He said, “Oh of course, you mean the Archangel . . . Yes, he is there.”

  I heaved a sigh of relief and then said, “Dad, all you have to do is put your hand in Michael’s hand and he will take you through.” I was terrified actually, I had no idea what would happen.

  My dad took one last look at me and asked, “Are you sure Lesley?” I replied firmly, “Yes!” But the fear in me was huge, not knowing what if anything would happen. He stretched out his arm, put his hand out, breathed a huge sigh and went into an instant coma, with a smile on his face.

  That night, sleeping on the floor next to his bed I heard his breathing change. I woke my mother and sister and told them that Dad was about to leave. We held him in our arms as he took his last breath and we saw a beautiful white light leave his heart. We held him with tears streaming down our faces but with smiles too because as my mom said, he didn’t die, he was reborn into something way beyond, something of such beauty.

  On my next journey to Peru I had my first ayahuasca experience. Aya told me that “They” [the spirits] gave me my name as they give everyone their names even though our parents think they thought of it. Aya said it was important for me to know what my name means, as everyone should, because there is something in our names that will give a clue as to what our life service is. I eventually found a names book and it said that Lesley means “the Gatekeeper.” I was shocked but so grateful to realize that I had accomplished one thing that had great meaning for my life.

  Being with my father on his “rebirth” was one of the most incredibly beautiful experiences of my life, one that I will forever be grateful for, and one that fills me with awe at the magnificence of death. It is as miraculous as birth.

  I believe that I would not have been able to assist my father if I had not drunk San Pedro first, as the message of this plant is one of being in harmony and peace with everything. San Pedro opened my heart and mind to all things miraculous, to the God inside each of us, and to the understanding that death as we know it is just an illusion. We are forever a part of everything.

  Your San Pedro is very different from the others I have drunk. For one thing there seems more “love” in it. Where do you find it and how do you account for this difference?

  La Gringa: I went through phases of trying San Pedro from different parts of Peru. For a while I thought cactus from the Lima area was stronger but then a friend brought me San Pedro that he had collected from Arequipa, northern Peru, and Ayacucho. I tried them all, cooking them in the same way, and to my surprise found that they were all equally strong. I drank all three, plus the medicine from Lima, over a period of a few months, asking which was the San Pedro for me, and of course the answer was that the spirit of San Pedro is always the same if treated with the same respect and love. San Pedro told me that no matter which cactus I cooked, if I did it with the same respect, all of it would be perfect and all of it would heal, the secret being the belief I had in this spirit. So bang went my old theory! Now I have San Pedro growing in my garden from many different parts of Peru and I treat them all as equals.

  I was taught by Rubén about the different ribs and their uses [i.e., the different number of ridges around the cactus. See chapter 4 by Michael Simonato for a discussion of these and their different effects]. I prefer to use seven and nine ribs as they seem to be the ones that speak to each individual in the way they best understand, and always with love and healing. I also look for cactus that has a darkish green color just because they look perfect!

  I cook my medicine for anything between twelve and twenty hours. I find that in this way there is less purging. Purging is not a bad thing but we don’t physically have to purge either. If there is purging to be done as a cleansing it can be done energetically too, which is a smoother process. I prefer smooth. I don’t like to suffer if I don’t have to!

  I don’t normally add anything to my brew although on some occasions I do add little extras, like flowers usually, just because the plant tells me to. I sometimes add flower essences that my friend Star Ripparetti from Santa Barbara makes. Star is very connected to flowers, her essences are awesome, and every now and then, when one of her essences calls to be added, the San Pedro experience is always more special. But in the end San Pedro is all that is needed.

  You asked about my secret cooking process . . . well if I told you, then it wouldn’t be secret would it? [Laughing] But what I can tell you is that it takes a few years to get the “secret.” It takes a lot of experience of actually drinking the medicine, for many years sometimes, before you receive your personal recipe from San Pedro. That’s the secret I was telling you about.

  For example, my teacher Rubén taught me the basics of cooking and it’s the same that you could probably find on the Internet; it’s a simple process and it works. But he never revealed his secret to me; he told me I would receive my own if I had patience and respect for this process. I waited many years before I received my gift from the plant and that’s my secret, given to me personally by my teacher.

  I don’t add anything to wachuma, even if a patient has a particular problem and that’s why they are drinking it, to be healed. I do, however, prepare special herbal teas for particular ailments such as diabetes, a heart condition, headache, or such. But these teas are not particularly for the healing (San Pedro does that); they are used to assist.

  I’d like to know more about why you run ceremonies in the way you do. Rubén taught you the “old fashioned” way—so why did you change things to daytime ceremonies and less ritual, and so forth?

  La Gringa: Most wachumeros [San Pedro shamans] hold their ceremonies at night and as you know, mine are held during the day. They both have their virtues but an important aspect for me is to feel safe, warm, and comfortable in order to receive the most benefits from the ceremony.

  As you know, I come from South Africa where heat is abundant. I love heat and sunshine and nights in Cusco are always cold. There is no such thing as a warm night in Cusco! I have done many ceremonies at night and they can be intense, sometimes akin to an ayahuasca experience because there is no escape, it’s all “inward.” But I have also experienced ceremonies at night where I have not been able to have any breakthrough, feeling almost like I am not experiencing the medicine because I am so cold. As one’s body temperature drops anyway with this medicine it becomes increasingly harder to journey.

  This is frustrating and uncomfortable for me—and presuming I am the same as most people, I prefer to have the gift of sunshine on my face and to see, feel, and hear the wonders of daytime. It’s so easy to connect to nature when you are outside, seeing the powerful energy in the clouds, hearing the winds talking to you, watching the Earth breathe, and knowing what each flower has to teach us. It’s a happy reconnection to this beautiful universe and comfort and warmth is always a good way to go!

  The night ceremonies are usually done inside, which can sometimes provide the warmth but then you are missing out on our beautiful Mother Earth dressed in all her many-colored garments and jewels. She is so magnificent. To experience her in this way is such an incredible gift and one that will, for sure, show the true beauty of existence and our perfect connection to this
wondrous universe we are so privileged to be part of. Just to experience that is enough to change our view of everything forever.

  I asked our friend Danny [a San Pedro assistant and local historian] what he knew of the past wachumero way and he explained to me some of the old ways. It makes perfect sense.

  San Pedro (or wachuma) was the traditional shamanic way to treat people by Andean shamans. (Traditionally the word shaman does not exist here. Healers are called wachumeros if they work with San Pedro, ayahuaskeros for ayahuasca, altomisayoc in the Q’ero tradition, paqos in the Alturas, or curanderos, the healers). Danny said that in the past the techniques used were sometimes shocking, harsh, and difficult,*24 but these methods worked for that time because people also knew less about “finding themselves” and needed more tools to help them let go. In our time we have access to all sorts of information on self-knowledge, healing, et cetera, and have more understanding and knowledge. The myths of shamanism have also changed so there is less “awe” attached to us—people see that shamans are not dark legendary creatures but sacred keepers of lost spiritual knowledge that can aid our complex evolution into a new way of life.

  Daytime ceremonies allow us to see and understand without fear all that we already know but have hidden from ourselves. Night represents what we don’t know or understand clearly (we directly face our fears with no light to help us). Day allows us to see all that we have achieved already and how that can be used as a tool of spiritual realization and awareness. It opens the possibility of spreading the message further to all who ask and need.

  The early shamans were very adaptive to social changes. They guarded important spiritual wisdom in hard times but they spread it again in its right moment—and now it feels like the right moment. Wachuma is spreading its magic now; this is the time.

  We need to remember that we live in a world of day and night. Day was used to feel comfortable and enjoy the beauty of life, to work and play. Night had less action and was not as comfortable as the days; that’s why we made shelters. Probably that’s why shamans held ceremonies at night too, because darkness challenges one to naturally attempt to defeat fears. But something has changed in these last decades.

  With the social changes we have seen, we have been bringing more light to our nighttime in the attempt to create a more balanced world. There are still many people, however, who are living unhealthy lifestyles because they can’t see the differences between our “brain light” and natural light. That’s why San Pedro during the day makes more sense. Then we start to understand about the natural light that is within us and about the light of the universe, and to understand balance within ourselves. Wachuma helps us to see this clearly. It teaches us about balance. Day and Night. Light and Darkness.

  So yes, the traditional way of the wachumeros is during the night. But we are in a new time and I know that San Pedro supports me in every way and gives me blessings in what I do. It was San Pedro that told me to do my ceremonies during the day and also told me to do these ceremonies in a simple way, with prayer. Wachuma told me that this is a way for us to understand and relate to. So that’s what I do.

  Can you give some more examples of people who have been healed by San Pedro? How do you think San Pedro heals? Are there any conditions you are aware of that it won’t heal? Any failures?

  La Gringa: San Pedro teaches us to heal ourselves by showing us the truth and once you experience the truth there is no getting away from it.

  It teaches us that no experience is bad if we learn from it, because when we get the truth we understand and we release the “old feelings,” whether they are anger, betrayal, loss, fear, et cetera, therefore changing the energy in our bodies. This heals us of emotional and physical illnesses.

  San Pedro is heart medicine in that it teaches us to use our hearts, knowing that all our answers are within us. It shows us our connection to everyone and everything, opens our hearts, teaching us how to think with the heart. (Rubén used to tell me to think with the heart and feel with the brain. Not easy!)

  This medicine teaches us to really live in the moment, to understand how much time and energy we waste on “re-creating” the past, imagining that we are still in that moment of pain or fear or loss when in fact it is just a memory, we cannot really re-live the past. It teaches us to let go of the past, learn from it, and move on. It also shows us how much time we waste on the future when in fact no one knows what the next second will bring. That’s one of Pedro’s ways of teaching us to really live in the moment, to show and feel gratitude for everyone and everything around us. Once we start truly showing gratitude for this wondrous world we live in, that’s when we start to receive the gifts from the universe in abundance and with ease.

  San Pedro is known as “rebirthing medicine,” enabling us to feel clean and healed and to get a new start. Some people even go through the motions of giving birth during their San Pedro journeys and it’s a very real experience for them.

  This medicine also helps us to restore pH balance, which is imperative to good health, therefore getting us back into balance. Many diseases today are because of this. We do not eat well anymore—too much meat, colas, and so forth, and not enough greens. San Pedro can balance this for us again but of course it’s up to us to use the knowledge we receive from the plant and make healthy decisions every moment. Yes, San Pedro can heal us but in the end it’s up to us to choose to help our bodies to be in balance.

  Of course there are times when the medicine hasn’t healed the body (or the mind for that matter). My thoughts on this vary. Sometimes, for example, a person with an addiction may come for healing and although he might believe he has been healed, he may then go back to his addiction. It is not that San Pedro has not done the healing, however; I would say that the person just changed his decision. We all do that mostly. We have free will and can decide whatever we want. But sometimes we just make bad decisions.

  What of our angel friend Ross from South Africa who passed on last year? [Ross was a patient with cancer who drank ayahuasca at the healing center I then owned in Iquitos and San Pedro with La Gringa in a search for healing.] He was intent on healing and tried many different methods. They didn’t work on a physical level but on a spiritual level those of us who knew Ross saw an angel before us. He was obviously prepared for something much higher, he was ready, and he left a great legacy to all of us. He taught us how to keep searching, to respect, love, and be in gratitude every moment. Ross was always peaceful, giving, and loving and he did not fear death. He knew there was something more and he taught us how to accept and never give up on love. So you asked me if there have been failures with this plant medicine. My answer is NO, but it all depends on our perspectives. Ross did not survive but he was able to live and die well and to teach us all something precious and important before he left us.

  It’s a pity that this medicine is not “available” in most countries as the cure list goes on and on. San Pedro can cure schizophrenia, for example, if the patient has not taken the usual drugs to supposedly heal this illness. Those drugs stay in the body for seven or eight years, making it impossible to use San Pedro to heal as this could be dangerous. But if no meds have been taken, San Pedro can heal this.

  To illustrate some of the healing that San Pedro is capable of and the ways in which it works, La Gringa then handed me two recent accounts she had just received from people who had drunk the medicine with her. I am including them here as examples, but also see the reports of others in the appendix of this book who have drunk San Pedro to heal a range of conditions.

  Regan’s Story

  My first experience with San Pedro was when La Gringa visited South Africa at the beginning of 2010. I was sceptical about plant medicine even though I had read so many miracles about it and the work it does. I live in a country where traditional medicine has been around for centuries but I felt that it never applied to me.

  I was diagnosed with bipolar mood disorder and had been medicated for well over ten years. According t
o my GP I was one of the highest functioning patients he’d treated. I faithfully swallowed my plethora of drugs every morning, never skipping a day because I was terrified of what the implications would be for me and my family. I was “stable.”

  The San Pedro ceremony was conducted in the tranquillity of a garden under the warm African sun. La Gringa advised us all to open our hearts and ask San Pedro our questions and know that the answers would be forthcoming.

  Swallowing the medicine was the hardest (physical) part. I’d heard it described as liquidized frog and willed myself to swallow it without tasting it. The process that day wasn’t easy for me. I had to take two large doses before I managed to open myself enough for San Pedro to do his work.

  Answers that had evaded me for years hit me like a bolt of lightning. The day was difficult, with me oscillating between joy and sadness. Sadness because the answers that I was desperately searching for were locked deeply inside me and I was holding on to the pain so tightly instead of just releasing it to the universe and trusting that I could be healed.

  One of the realizations I had was that I needed to travel to Peru to complete the work that I started. Standing in the kitchen, I put my arms around La Gringa and promised to visit her at the end of the year. We could hardly believe that the decision was so easy for me to make.

  Before I left South Africa La Gringa told me that I had to stop taking ALL of my medication for at least two weeks before I was due to arrive in Peru, as if I believed I was coming for healing then I had to trust in that process. For the first time in over a decade I would not have any pharmaceuticals in my system. A terrifying prospect!