The Ruins Of Us (Mayhem Book 3)

by Catharina Maura

“Second thoughts, Minx?”

  She looks up at me, her hands on my chest. She flattens her palms against my skin and slides her hands up, until she’s got them wrapped around my neck. I love it when she touches me like that, without abandon. Slowly but surely, she’s turning back into the girl I used to know.

  “Who? Me? Never.”

  I chuckle and lift her into my arms in one fell swoop, eliciting a yelp from her. She hangs onto me tightly and shoots me a warning look. “Don’t throw me in,” she warns, and I pause.

  “Hmm, I hadn’t thought of that, but now that you mention it…”

  She narrows her eyes and I grin at her as I lower her to the floor. “Go on, get in. You’ll get cold if you stay out of the water.”

  Emilia nods at me and looks up into my eyes hesitantly. “So… I didn’t actually have swim wear,” she says as she undoes the sash on her robe.

  I blink at her, my heart racing. Her robe falls open, and she lets it fall off her shoulders slowly, until she’s standing in front of me in black lace underwear. I bite down on my lip harshly and try my best to look away, but try as I might, I can’t. She’s fucking stunning. I thought she looked amazing years ago, but she looks even better now. I wish I could touch her. I wish she was still mine.

  Emilia smiles in satisfaction when her robe hits the floor, and she bites down on her lip as she walks past me. I close my eyes and inhale deeply. I’m about to make a huge fool of myself with the tent in my swim shorts. Thank god they’re loose shorts at least. I turn my back to her briefly to reposition myself in a feeble effort to hide how hard I am, and I shake my head. This hasn’t happened to me since I was a teenager. Matter of fact, no woman other than Emilia has ever made me hard so unexpectedly. I still have no control over my body when she’s around.

  Emilia’s eyes roam over my body curiously as I enter the water, and I’m certain there’s a brief flash of disappointment when her gaze reaches my swim shorts. This Minx. She was trying to turn me on on purpose.

  Emilia swims on her back, her eyes on the clouds in the sky. I grin at her as I do my laps. She’s not even remotely swimming in a straight line, and multiple times she ends up banging her head on the edges of the pool, because she has zero spatial awareness.

  I swim up to her and stop right in front of her, a huge smile on my face. I pull her up, and Emilia grins and puts her hands on my shoulder, keeping herself up as I wrap my hands around her waist. “Minx, you still can’t swim for shit.”

  She laughs and pulls me just a little closer. I want her flush against my body, my fingers threaded through her hair.

  “You know what this reminds me of?” I murmur.

  Emilia grins, her cheeks bright red. “The lake.”

  I nod. “The lake.”

  The last time she and I were in the lake by the summer cabin I had her pressed up against one of the wooden posts by the pier, my cock buried deep inside her and her lips on mine. Just that memory has me getting impossibly hard.

  Emilia smirks when she feels my bulge against her stomach. I thought she might move away, but she doesn’t.

  “I told you I’d marry you someday,” I whisper.

  Emilia tightens her grip on me, her smile bittersweet. “And I said I know.”

  That day was the first time I asked her to move in with me. Even then, I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I think I still do.

  I pull Emilia even closer, until her body is flush against mine, and she wraps her legs around my waist, the way she did back then. I’m rock hard and pressing right between her legs. I bite down on my lip as Emilia wraps her arms around my neck.

  I drop my forehead to her shoulder and inhale deeply. “I always thought you’d be my wife by now,” I murmur.

  Emilia buries her hand in my hair and clutches me tightly. I lift my head to look at her, and her eyes are filled with the same intensity I’m feeling. She cups my cheek and drops her forehead to mine.

  “Me too,” she whispers. “For years I avoided all mention of you, scared that I’d read about you dating someone else, or even worse, marrying someone else. I wanted you to be happy, but I just… I couldn’t.”

  I thread my fingers through her hair, the way I’ve been wanting to, and look into her eyes. “I’d never marry anyone that isn’t you, Emilia. I haven’t even had a girlfriend since you. Sure, there have been some girls, but no other woman ever got to call me hers, the way you always have.”

  Emilia looks at me, insecurity making her gaze waver. “What about Layla?”

  I smile and shake my head. “No. Never. She doesn’t even remotely have any rights to me. There’s only ever been you for me.”

  Emilia looks away in guilt, and I wonder if it’s Sam she’s thinking about. I don’t know how many men came after me, and I don’t want to know.

  I can’t help the direction that my thoughts turn to. I can’t help but think of her with Sam.

  “What are we doing? I whisper. “You just broke up with your boyfriend, and your father is sick. You’re vulnerable, and you’re probably still heartbroken.”

  I’m surprised when I feel Emilia tighten her legs around me. She looks at me as though she can read my mind. As though she knows exactly what I’m thinking. “Carter,” she whispers. “I’m here with you now, and there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. No one else I’d rather be with.”

  She grabs my hand and entwines it with her own before raising it to her lips. She kisses my knuckles softly and looks at me. “You told me, didn’t you?” She whispers. “You told me he couldn’t touch me. That he couldn’t lay a finger on me… And he hasn’t.”

  I narrow my eyes, suddenly filled with insecurity and jealousy. I grab her hands and push them above her head. “Tell me the truth,” I say, my body radiating anger. “You spent weeks sleeping next to him. I’ve lived with you before, Emilia. You and I have never spent a whole night together without having sex at least once. So don’t fucking lie to me, Emilia. Don’t look into my eyes and lie to me like that.”

  I sigh and pull away from her. “Come on, it’s getting late,” I murmur.

  “Carter, no,” she whispers, anguished. I push away from her and turn to get out of the pool, needing space.

  The idea of Emilia with Sam ruined my mood. Just knowing that she used to be his. That he’s had her, that he’s probably still on her mind. It fucking kills me.

  Chapter 42

  Carter

  I enter my bedroom quietly, not even bothering to turn the lights on. Asher and I went out for drinks, and he spent the entire time warning me away from Emilia. I know that he’s right – I know it, but my heart is refusing to get the message.

  I sigh and lie back on my bed. Having Emilia back here makes it so easy to forget. When I see her smile at me, it’s easy to forget about all the tears my family and I have brought to her eyes.

  I frown when I hear my bedroom door open. I inhale deeply, and my heart starts to race. That perfume… Where did she get it? She hasn’t been wearing it, and it’s one of the things I’ve missed most.

  Emilia walks straight to my wardrobe, not realizing that I’m lying here. She probably thinks I’m still out with Asher. I turn on my side and watch her as she opens my wardrobe and browses through my clothes. She traces over the fabric of my clothes with the tip of her fingers, and I can just about see her smile to herself. She takes one of my T-shirts off the hanger and brings it to her nose. I watch her as she inhales deeply, my heart hammering in my chest.

  “Seems like you’re putting a lot of thought into this thievery.”

  Emilia jumps, shocked. She turns to find me lying on my bed and I sit up, a wide grin on my face.

  “I… You… What are you doing here?”

  I laugh and run a hand through my hair. “Looks like you’re stealing my lines too, Minx.”

  I rise to my feet and walk up to her, pausing right in front of her. I lift my hand to her face and brush her hair out of the way gently. The way she looks at me makes my heart race.
I glance down at her hands and shake my head. “So, this is what you selected, huh?”

  Emilia blinks and tries to hide her stolen goods behind her back, but all that does is make me chuckle. I glance at my wardrobe and smile. “I’m a bit disappointed that you didn’t take one of my dress shirts,” I murmur.

  Emilia blushes and looks away. “I was going to,” she says sheepishly. “But I figured that you’d realize I stole one.”

  “Now here’s the thing, Emilia… I’ve always wanted to see you in one of them.”

  I look into her eyes as my hands find their way to the buttons of my shirt. Emilia’s lips drop open as I undo them one by one, my eyes never leaving her. I stop halfway, and a small disappointed whimper leaves Emilia’s lips. I look up at her, an intimate smirk on my face. I grab her hands and place them on my chest.

  “Tell you what, Emilia… If you take this shirt off me, you can have it,” I say, moving her hands to the buttons that are yet to be undone.

  She looks up into my eyes, and takes a step closer. She’s breathing as hard as I am and I wonder if she’s feeling what I’m feeling.

  Her hands tremble as she undoes the remaining buttons one by one. My shirt falls open, my abs and chest on display, and Emilia drinks me in the way she used to. I love seeing the lust in her eyes, the eagerness. For a while I was wondering whether she might still be thinking about Sam, whether she might be heartbroken, but it’s obvious that I’m all she can see.

  I thread my hand through her hair and pull her closer. “You never make things easy, do you? I’ve been trying to give you space, but you keep testing me. First you show up at the pool looking fucking irresistible, and now you sneak into my room… Are you tempting me? Are you wondering how long I’ll be able to stay away? Because I am. I’m wondering.”

  Emilia slides her hands up my chest and around my neck, her eyes roaming over my body and lingering on my face. She smiles at me and my heart skips a beat. “Maybe,” she whispers. “What if I am?”

  I inhale deeply and tighten my grip on her hair. “I told myself I’d stay away from you,” I whisper. “That I wouldn’t be your rebound. But fucking hell, Emilia. I’ll be whatever the fuck you want me to be.”

  Emilia grabs my hair, her eyes mirroring my own desire. “Be mine,” she tells me, her voice barely above a whisper.

  I groan as my lips come crashing down on hers, and Emilia moans against my lips. “Baby, I’ve been yours since the day I laid eyes on you.”

  I lift Emilia into my arms and push her against the wall. She wraps her legs around me tightly, a small sigh escaping her lips. I kiss her deeper and Emilia pulls on my hair eagerly, wanting more. I’ve got my dick nestled against her pussy, and it feels amazing. My hands find their way underneath her robe, and I gasp when I realize that she’s naked underneath.

  “Carter,” she whispers, her hands moving over my body impatiently. I smile and move my lips to her neck and graze her skin with my teeth the way I know she likes. She rolls her hips against me and I grin.

  Emilia pushes my shirt off my arms impatiently, and I chuckle. I tug on the sash of her robe and unravel it. I inhale deeply as her body comes into view. “How the fuck did you get even more beautiful?” I whisper.

  I walk to my bed and lie her down carefully before joining her. Emilia tries to cover herself up with her hands and I shake my head. I grab her wrists and slowly move them out of the way, exposing her body. Emilia blushes and I lower my lips to her neck. “Stunning,” I whisper. Emilia threads her hand through my hair and pulls my lips back to hers. How long have I waited for this? It’s been years. Years of dreaming and fantasizing about finally having her back in my arms. My heart feels tight as I kiss her back.

  Emilia takes her time tracing her hands over my body, and I shiver just slightly when she undoes the buttons of my suit trousers. “Off,” she whispers, and I press a kiss to her lips as I make quick work of my clothes.

  Emilia bites down on her lip as I tug the robe fully off. Her eyes drop to my dick and she licks her lips, her chest rising and falling rapidly. “Emilia,” I whisper, and she tightens her grip on me. I kiss her harder, her tongue tangling with mine. I just can’t get enough of her.

  I settle between her legs and slide up against her. She’s so wet already. I already know I’m not going to be able to last long. My fingers find their way between Emilia’s legs and she gasps. “I want you,” she whispers. “Please, Carter. I’ve waited for years. I can’t wait for another second.”

  I pull back to look at her, my heart soaring. Emilia looks into my eyes and the way that she’s looking at me makes me feel like crying for everything we’ve lost, everything we’ve missed out on. She still looks at me the way she did years ago, and it still makes my heart race the same way. Lying here with her, it’s so easy to pretend that we’re still together. That we never broke up at all.

  “Emilia,” I whisper, sounding heartbroken even to myself. She tightens her grip on me and pulls me closer, her lips finding mine. She kisses me the way she used to, pouring every single feeling into it. I lose myself in her and sigh when I finally pull away. “I’ve missed you so fucking much,” I whisper. I tangle my hand through her hair and pull on it as my lips come crashing back down on hers harshly. I kiss her until we’re both breathless.

  I pull away to look at her and smile. I love having her in my bed. Her hair is a mess, her cheeks flushed, her lips swollen and her eyes filled with me. I reach for my trousers on the floor and fish a condom out of my wallet.

  “I’m going to fuck you, Emilia,” I say, and she bites down on her lip in anticipation. “I’m going to fuck you so hard you won’t ever think about another man. I’m going to fuck you so good that no one will ever be able to satisfy you the way I do. I’m going to keep you coming back for more, you hear me?”

  Emilia nods and swallows hard as I tangle my hand further into her hair and align myself with her. “Look at me as I stretch out your pussy, baby,” I whisper, and I slowly sink deeper into her. Emilia’s eyes fall closed in delight, and I’m not even halfway inside her. I pause and tighten my grip on her hair. “None of that. You look at me if you want me to fuck you, Emilia.” Her eyes flutter open and her inner muscles spasm. “I want you to see me when I fuck you.”

  “I always see you,” she whispers. “No matter who I’m with.”

  I grin at her smugly and push further into her. “Good girl,” I whisper, and in one hard thrust I push all the way inside her. Emilia moans loudly and I grit my teeth in an effort to stay in control. “Still so fucking perfect,” I murmur.

  Emilia tightens her legs around my hips as I thrust in and out of her, my eyes on hers. “You’re mine, you hear me?”

  Emilia nods. “I’m yours. I’ve always been yours.”

  I nod and grab her legs, throwing them over my shoulders. I remember every single thing about her body, every angle she likes. Emilia almost loses it as I hit her G spot with every thrust.

  “Carter, it’s too much,” she moans. I love seeing her like this. I love driving her crazy like this.

  “It’s never enough,” I say. “I’ll never get enough of you.”

  I increase the pace and Emilia gasps. “I can’t…”

  I grin at her smugly. “Then come. Come for me baby. Come on my cock.”

  Emilia shatters at those words and I grunt as her muscles tighten around me. I look into her eyes as I come right along with her. I lower her legs and hold myself up as I press my lips against hers. I kiss her sweetly, and the way she kisses me back makes my heart feel like it might burst.

  I pull away just slightly to take care of the condom and then pull her closer. I spoon her and press my lips to her neck. Emilia fidgets slightly, obviously unsure whether she should stay or go. I smile to myself and tighten my grip on her. “You’re not going anywhere,” I whisper into her hair, before kissing her neck. “I’ve waited years to have you in my bed, and now that I’ve got you here, I won’t let you go.”

  Emilia relaxes ag
ainst me and I smile to myself. We fall asleep just like that, wrapped in each other, both of us happier than we’ve been in years.

  Chapter 43

  Emilia

  I wake up alone and panic slightly. I glance around me, my hand gliding over Carter’s side of the bed. I exhale in relief when I realize that it’s still warm. Last night was perfect. It’s everything I’ve been wanting for years, but I can’t help but worry. Carter and I have always been intense, our very first kiss was when we were skinny-dipping, after all. Last night was unexpected, though. I wasn’t planning on sleeping with him, but I just couldn’t resist. I couldn’t stay away.

  I slip out of bed, my eyes falling to the shirt on the floor. I smile as I think back to the way Carter dared me to take it off him. I grab it from the floor and slip it on. It is mine now, after all. He did tell me that I could keep it if I took it off him. I bite down on my lip as I button it up and slip my robe on over it.

  I can’t remember the last time I felt this happy. I can’t remember the last time I felt these butterflies. When is the last time I was unable to stop smiling? I’m grinning as I walk down the stairs, the smell of freshly made coffee coming from the kitchen.

  Carter’s eyes find mine as I walk in, and for a couple of seconds he is all I can see. He’s in his boxers, and I want him again. I want him right here, in his kitchen. He’s been driving me crazy, walking around in his swim shorts every morning. I’m done resisting. I know he wants me just as badly, and I’ve spent too many years feeling incomplete, empty and lonely, to stay away now.

  I walk up to him and hold my hand out. Carter chuckles as he surrenders his coffee cup. I smile to myself as I bring it to my lips. I’ve missed him so much, and I’m done denying myself the one thing in life I want most.

  “If you just had more patience, I would have brought you coffee in bed,” Carter murmurs.

  I take a sip of his coffee and shake my hand. “Patience isn’t my strong suit.”