The Heart of Baker’s Bay

by Danielle Jacks

  “You know you’re managing the café anyway.”

  “My gran is there if I need her though. If I let her leave, I won’t have a safety net to fall back on. I’d have to deal with whatever bad luck came my way, knowing I’d be letting her down if I failed.”

  “You have Kayleigh and me. All you have to do is ask if you need help.”

  “I guess.”

  We head down towards the beach and weave between the rock pools. He helps me over the tricky bits as I stumble along behind him. I try not to think about how good it feels having his warm hand in mine, and how easily it covers my small one. We move down onto the far side of the beach.

  “The Batman suggestion was a joke, but is this a pirate smugglers’ cave?”

  “Maybe. I guess you need a guidebook to learn the history of the land, or a knowledgeable tour guide.”

  “It’s a good job I have you then.”

  He gestures to an opening in the rocks that has the seawater running through the entrance. Adam takes off his socks and boots, throwing them to one side. I follow his lead, removing my footwear and rolling up my trousers. The water is freezing when I dip my toe into the sea.

  “Are you sure this cave is worth embracing the cold chill running through me right now?”

  “You need to learn to take a few risks once in a while.”

  “Says the guy who literally won’t take a single step outside the village.” I cover my mouth. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

  “I’ll make you an offer. If you take a chance on the café then I’ll walk with you to the bank.”

  This is a huge deal for Adam, it must be. Everything he’s said and done points to him never wanting anything from the outside world. “Why does this mean so much to you?”

  Instead of answering me, he takes off into the water, running into the cave. I hesitate for a second before chasing after him. The cold water doesn’t bother me as much as I thought it would, and the cave is surprisingly lighter than I’d anticipated. Small holes in the rocks allow beams of light to shimmer through, making the view breathtakingly beautiful. He turns to face me while I marvel at the scenery.

  “It doesn’t make a difference to me if you do this for Molly, but from what you’ve told me so far, I think you need this opportunity. I stay in Clover Bay because everything I want is here. The fact I don’t leave makes no difference in my life. If you take over the café, I think it’ll help with your confidence. You can do this, Jo. Just give yourself a chance.”

  It’s nice to hear he has faith in me, but it isn’t confidence I’m lacking. He doesn’t know what I’m capable of. I’m hesitant to commit to something so major. I’m a fuck up. I always fuck up.

  We explore the cave, looking at the small fish and crabs waiting for the tide to take them away. Our conversation stays light, and we don’t discuss my grandmother or the café in any further detail. Once the hours slip by, Adam walks me home. I had a great evening, even if some moments were intense. We wave goodbye to each other at the door, and I watch him disappear along his usual path with a strange hope he’ll look back at me, but he doesn’t. Once he’s gone from sight, I enter the cottage. I can’t hide my grin thinking about how well our evening went. I like Adam more than I should, which is bad. Very bad.

  “Jody, is that you?” my grandmother shouts. Her voice is filled with urgency and something I can’t read.

  I dash into the cottage, shouting her name until I find her on the cold tile floor in the kitchen. She lets out a gasp. Mincemeat and gravy are splattered across the floor. Broken glass from the dish is mixed with the mess.

  “What did you do? I would’ve made dinner if you’d waited.”

  “I wanted to surprise you. I’ve had enough of eating sandwiches and you’ve been gone for hours.”

  I feel bad for not trying to learn more than baking recipes. It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her I can’t cook, but now is not the time. She winces in pain, clutching at her leg.

  “Tell me what to do.”

  “I can’t get up.”

  “Should I go get Adam?” I reach into my pocket and pull out my mobile phone.

  “I think my leg’s broken. You need to call an ambulance.”

  “Okay, I can do that.” I feel numb, like I’m having an out of body experience. I dial the number in a daze and give the details needed. This feels like a bad dream rather than my reality.

  After I phone for help, I sit with my grandmother while we wait for someone to arrive. Tears prick my eyes as I try to fight off the emotion of seeing her in so much pain. I don’t regret my time with Adam, but maybe my gran needed me more than I realised. I should’ve checked on her before wandering off. About forty minutes later, there’s a knock on the door, and I race to open it. The paramedics load her onto a stretcher while I grab a few essential things for her. I secure the cottage and follow them out to the Jeep. Mountain rescue is the only vehicle I’ve seen in the village, and it looks out of place. The bumpy cobbles are narrow and barely wide enough for the Jeep. I watch them slowly navigate through the small streets as we make our way to the main road.

  Once we make it to the hospital, it’s confirmed by an x-ray that my gran has broken her hip. She looks older and frailer than I’ve ever seen her before. Clover Bay appears to be less than friendly for her now. The hill is too steep, and the landscape is too much of a burden. With her out of action, I’ve no choice but to step up to the challenge and take over the Botanist Tearoom.

  “I’ll call my mum and Hannah to let them know what’s happened. Don’t worry about the café. I can handle it,” I say.

  “I know you can, sweet girl. I have every faith in you.”

  I stroke her hand and she smiles. The pain medication seems to be working, which fills me with relief. It isn’t long until my gran falls asleep. My own eyes feel tired, but my mind is working overtime. I’m determined to do a good job with the café. This is my chance to prove my worth and show everyone what I’m capable of. My gran believes in me, and I want to prove she has a reason to think I can do this.

  It’s after midnight when I finally return to Clover Bay and climb into bed. The cottage is deadly quiet and feels strange. I miss the sound of the television coming from my grandmother’s room. We haven’t rekindled a long-lost family connection or become close, but I wish she was here. I like her company. I lay staring at the ceiling, listening to the sound of the crashing waves until I finally drift off, hoping tomorrow will bring a better day.

  Twelve

  Jody

  Monday

  The heat becomes unbearable, and I drop the tray of cookies on the floor. I curse under my breath as the skin on my forearm reddens. Abandoning the mess, I quickly head to the sink. I turn on the tap and run my burn under the cold water. I use my other arm to wipe away the frustrated tears rolling down my cheeks. It’s been a long day; between the hospital visit, my overly emotional mother, and the need to prepare for tomorrow, I’m a complete wreck.

  I grab the frozen peas out of the freezer and take them into the living room. It’s almost ten p.m., but I need to take a break. One more batch of cookies, and I can finally crawl into bed.

  It may be selfish of me, but my mood is mainly a pity party. I’m left here all alone while my mum and sister’s priority is my grandmother, as it should be, but I wish they’d check on me. The doctors have scheduled her operation for Tuesday morning, and my mum is staying with her. Once she’s allowed to leave the hospital, she won’t be returning to Clover Bay. Instead, in the short term, she’ll be occupying my old room in the flat where I live with my sister. I’m trapped here and I feel like I can’t breathe. I’m not the girl anyone should rely on. I’m the person you choose as a last resort. The Botanist Tearoom is down to its last chance, and I’m running the show. The hope I felt yesterday has evaporated, and I’m running out of motivation.

  I lift the peas from my arm, examining my tender skin. It takes a few minutes for the skin to redden again, and the heat i
sn’t as intense. I cover it over with the improvised ice bag and lie back on the sofa. Usually, I’d ring Sarah and we’d laugh at my misfortune, but I don’t think it will help tonight. If anything, I’d feel worse.

  A knock at the door startles me, and the peas fall onto my lap. They drop onto the floor as I stand, but I don’t pick them up. I grab the sweeping brush as I edge closer towards the sound. I fasten the chain to secure the door before opening it slowly.

  “Hello?” I say in an uncertain voice.

  There’s a pause. A man’s black coat comes into view, and I move back, bracing myself for an attack.

  “Hi, it’s Adam. I know it’s late, but your grandmother asked me to check on you.”

  My heart’s racing and my hands shake as I unfasten the chain and lean the sweeping brush against the wall. “You scared me.”

  “I’m sorry. Do you want me to leave?”

  “No.” I run my hand over my hair and Adam catches sight of my burn. I step backwards as he pushes forward to examine the pink tinge on my skin. He has me backed against the wall, but he doesn’t seem to notice.

  “What happened?” His voice is full of concern.

  “I need to bake something for tomorrow. When I took the tray out of the oven, I accidentally caught my skin on the side of the shelf.”

  “You should’ve called. I would’ve helped you bake if you’d asked.” His tone is scolding.

  “I don’t have your number,” I answer weakly. He doesn’t live far, and I’m fairly certain his phone number will be in my grandma’s address book. I could’ve got in touch with him, but I was too busy feeling sorry for myself.

  “Pass me your mobile.”

  I do as he asks, and he types his number in. He calls his phone before passing it back to me. He leaves me trying to catch up with what’s happening as he makes his way into the kitchen. Adam seems to always show up when I need him most. It’s like he has a sixth sense. He was sent to check on me this time. It’s no big gesture, but I can’t help the butterflies in my stomach. When I enter the kitchen, he’s scooping up the ruined cookies. He takes charge of the baking and relief floods my mind. I’m done with making decisions for today. My sister would say I’m overreacting, but I’m overwhelmed with how much my life has changed in the last twenty-four hours.

  Adam searches through the cupboards. Like a man on a mission, he begins to gather up what he needs. Without a second to lose, he gets to work mixing the ingredients into a bowl. Instead of offering my assistance, I watch him in his element. He’s a natural in the kitchen, and I’m envious of his skills. I run my arm under the cold tap a few more times before the heat subsides from my injury. Adam glances at me a few times, but neither of us speaks. I have no idea what he thinks of me or my lack of life skills. I wish I could show him a side of me I’m proud of, but this is me. I’m trying my best, but that doesn’t mean it’ll turn out okay in the end.

  Once he’s finished preparing the mixture, he places it into the oven, and we make our way into the living room.

  “You don’t have to feel like you’re alone. I’ll help you any way I can,” Adam says with sincerity.

  “It must be nice to be the person everyone can count on,” I think aloud.

  “Don’t be so harsh on yourself. With a little hard work, the Botanist Tearoom will be running like a well-oiled machine.”

  I like that’s he’s optimistic, although, he’s right. I don’t have any confidence in myself. “It’s easy for you to say. You don’t know how much of a disaster I am.”

  “Feeling sorry for yourself isn’t going to help anyone. If you don’t like the way things are turning out, then do something about it.”

  I’m shocked he’s so straight-talking with me. “Your life would be so much easier if you were willing to leave this village,” I shoot back while we’re being honest with each other.

  “This isn’t about me.”

  “I know. It’s just maybe you shouldn’t pick at my flaws when your own are just as bad.”

  “I want to stay in Clover Bay. There is no problem to fix. Don’t turn this around. If you want to be a better person then start trying to improve the things you don’t like.”

  “I can’t bake, order stock, or run a damn café.” I’m talking louder than necessary.

  He gets up in my face, glaring into my eyes. How did this conversation go south so quickly? I should be thanking him for helping me, not ruining the best friendship I have in this village.

  “Learn.” He grits his teeth.

  “If only it was that simple.”

  “It is that simple.”

  I turn away from him, thinking about the fire I’d caused at the laundrette. The only job I’d actually liked, and the only one I’d given my full attention to.

  “I think it’s time you leave.” I put my hand on my hip, avoiding his eye contact. He checks his watch.

  “In five minutes, you need to get the chocolate cake out of the oven. Cover it with a tea towel and leave it on the side until morning. I saw some whipped cream and jam in the fridge. Cut the cake in half when you get up in the morning and add the filling. Do you think you can handle that?” He’s talking down to me and my blood is boiling. I’m not a child, nor do I appreciate his condescending tone. I move to the back door and hold it open for him.

  “Goodbye, Adam,” I say as he steps over the threshold.

  “Goodnight, Jody.”

  I shut the door with a bang and lock it with the key. Even without realising it, Adam has fixed another problem. Now, instead of wanting to be anywhere else, I want to be here, alone. After following his instructions, I double-check the doors are secure and take myself up to bed. I change into my pyjamas and climb in between the sheets. My phone chimes with a message from Adam.

  Sweet dreams.

  I narrow my eyes at the screen, wondering if it’s a further dig, or does it just mean what it says? Instead of replying, I turn off the ringtone, pull the duvet up to my chin, and close my eyes. I’m completely done with this day.

  Thirteen

  Adam

  Tuesday

  The cool, crisp air makes these early hours more enjoyable. A shimmer of light from the sun dances across the sea, and it already looks like it’s going to be a warm day. I love this place. I’m almost at the heel of the cobblestone hill and my load is almost empty. I wish I had an excuse to see Jody, but my last couple of parcels are for the boathouse.

  I can’t help glancing into the café as I walk past. Jody is behind the counter, setting up the baked goods. I smile, but she either doesn’t see me or chooses to ignore me. I didn’t mean to cause an argument last night, but she seems hung up on her past failures. I want her to believe in herself, but instead, I only made her feel worse. I shouldn’t care that we didn’t make up before I left, but I do. My lips turn down into a frown as I think about it.

  When I reach my last stop, I take a minute to stare out into the open water. The salty air and soft crashes of waves lighten my mood. I unload the two brown paper packages and push them through the wooden hatch.

  With the sledge now empty, I make my way back towards the Botanist Tearoom. I should leave Jody to get on with her morning. She was obviously stressed last night, but I can’t help wanting to check she’s okay. I stand looking at her through the window as she pours water into the dispenser. Her hair is tied back into a ponytail and she has a few loose strands. When she turns to face the front of the shop, I notice her pretty face is covered in make-up. She looks more like the Jody who showed up on the first day. I’m scowling when she finally sees me. She brushes her hair away from her face before heading towards me. She opens the door and holds it open, waiting for me to enter.

  “I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. I was exhausted and took it out on you. Thank you for everything you’ve done to help me. I do really appreciate it,” Jody says in one breath, like she’s rushing to get the words out.

  “It wasn’t just you. I’m sorry too,” I s
ay.

  “I’m making myself a warm drink. Would you like a coffee?”

  I want to ask her about her thick lashes and colourful eye shadow, but I’m not sure how she would take my line of questioning. Personally, I prefer the natural beauty underneath. Could the make-up be a defence mechanism, or is this what the guys back in Manchester are attracted to? My jaw clenches at that thought of someone else being interested in dating her, but I quickly push down the thought.

  “Coffee would be great. Thanks.”

  The bell jingles as the door closes behind me. We make our way to the counter. I make myself comfortable, leaning against the counter, while she prepares the drinks.

  “Your cake turned out perfectly, by the way.”

  “Did you manage to add the filling?”

  “No problems at all.”

  “Great. Do you want me to stop by tonight to help you, or I could bring you a cake already baked?”

  “I have another favour to ask you.” She rubs the side of her neck.

  “Okay, out with it.”

  “It’s about the bank. I know technically I didn’t have any choice but to stay in Clover Bay, but you did say you’d venture out of the village if I stayed. I’d feel safer knowing I didn’t have a week’s worth of takings in the cottage. I’d go myself, but I have no idea what time Kayleigh will show up.”

  It’s a simple task, and it makes sense for me to go, especially when I’m already on my way back up the hill. It’s a few steps out of my comfort zone; one step closer to the outside world. Can I do this? Jody bites her lip while she waits for me to answer.

  “I’ll take the money for you,” I say, unsure if I believe my own words.

  She claps her hands together before coming out from behind the counter and hugging me. I wrap my arms around her small back to hold my balance. She’s like an excitable child, and I don’t want to think about what making her happy does to me.