by Kaye Kennedy
As we sat down, Kyle introduced us. "Allie Pierce, this is Britt and Jace Palmer."
Hearing my married name on Kyle's lips made me cringe every time. "Nice to meet you both." I nodded.
Autumn jumped in, "They're celebrating a month of wedded bliss."
"Wow, congrats."
"Thanks," Britt said, clutching her husband like true newlyweds.
"So how do you all know each other?" I asked.
Dylan answered, "Jace and I are on the job together."
Jace added. "We went through the academy at the same time, then ended up rookies in the same house, so I didn't have much choice but to be friends with his goofy ass."
"Friends? I tolerate you, at best." Dylan retorted.
Autumn shook her head. "Don't let them fool you. They have a serious bromance going on." She pointed to Britt. "We went to NYU together."
Britt nodded. "She's my bestie." That made me smile because the only thing I missed about Michigan was my friends. Although we'd hardly spoken since I'd moved, so maybe they weren't as good of friends as I'd thought they were.
I pointed to Dylan. "So your best friend," I pointed to Autumn, "married your best friend."
"That's right," Dylan replied.
"That's so sweet."
The waitress came over and Kyle ordered a beer, then asked me, "What would you like?"
"Umm, I'll have what you're having." Hanging out with Kyle the last few weeks, I'd realized how much I'd missed beer. Kevin couldn't stand the smell and wouldn't let me have any in the house, so I had stopped drinking it all together.
Kyle held up two fingers to the waitress before she walked away.
Autumn smiled at me. "Allie, what were these two like as kids? I want all the juicy details."
The guys groaned.
"Typical boys. Everything was about hockey with them. They were both quite good."
"Yeah?" Autumn asked. "I thought their stories were more hyperbolic than truth. You know, like the six-inch fish they caught was actually six-feet-long."
I laughed. "Well, some of them may be, but they're not lying about their talent." I pointed my thumb at Kyle. "He easily could've gone pro if he'd wanted to."
"Huh," Autumn replied. "Skiing, too?"
"Skiing?" I asked.
"Yeah, Kyle was on the FDNY ski team for a bit."
Kyle responded, "I took it up on a whim. One of the guys on the hockey team with me had crossed over. He invited me to one of their competitions as a last-minute replacement for a guy who'd been injured. Skiing is actually a lot like skating."
Dylan finished, "Who knew he'd end up being so good they'd ask him to join the team."
I grinned. "I'm not surprised."
The waitress brought over our beers and I savored the first sip.
"Tough day?" Kyle asked.
I shrugged. "Long."
"What do you do?" Britt asked.
"I'm a kindergarten teacher."
She held up her martini glass. "Cheers to you, sister. I'm out on that."
Everyone laughed.
Jace kissed her temple.
"Could you imagine?" Autumn interjected.
Britt sipped her cosmo. "Nightmare."
Autumn replied, "Yeah for the kids." She turned to me. "Britt's the department editor for the sex and dating section of Contemporary Magazine."
I raised my brows. "Wow."
"So the idea of her working with children is quite laughable," Autumn said.
A little while later, we'd all switched seats so that the guys were together on one side of the round table and us women were on the other.
Autumn took a sip of her mocktail. According to Kyle, Autumn couldn't drink alcohol because she'd had a lung transplant as a child. She stirred her straw in the glass. "So, Allie, I've got to ask. Are you and Kyle dating?"
I glanced over at Kyle who'd been deep in conversation with the guys. As though he could feel my stare, he turned to me and grinned. I smiled back. We’d seen each other a couple of times since the movie night at his house, but we hadn’t talked about we were doing. We were kind of just going with the flow. He’d kissed me several times, but that’s as far as it’d gone. Kissing him…well, it was a million times better than I’d remembered.
I reached for my beer. "Umm, we haven't put a label on it or anything."
"Girl, whatever you're doing, keep it up. I've never seen Kyle like this. The first time we met, I was convinced he hated me because he was so moody. He actually smiles now. It's wild."
I rubbed my lips together. "Really?"
"Yeah," Britt added. "He could be broody as fuck."
My stomach twisted. I hated that the decisions I'd made as a naïve teenager had led to him becoming so bitter.
Autumn continued, "The other night, Dylan said he finally felt like he had his brother back and that it's all your doing."
Britt responded, "Jeez, Autumn. No pressure or anything."
She put up her hands. "Just saying."
I neared the end of my third beer. "The Kyle I knew was actually a lot of fun." Sure, after his father had died, he’d become vastly more serious, but I'd assumed with time, that would've passed. Apparently not.
Both girls raised their eyebrows and Autumn said, "Interesting."
I finished my beer. They’d apparently all gone straight to my head because the next thing I said was, "It's my fault for leaving. I broke his heart. He told me he was in love with me and I ran away."
"Damn," Britt replied.
Autumn reached for my hand. "We all make mistakes."
I sighed. "I'm hoping I'm not too late to fix mine."
"If it's meant to be," Britt said, "then there's no such thing as too late. Sometimes people deserve second chances." She glanced at her husband with a smile and I wondered what the story was there.
"That's true," Autumn added. "And from where I sit, I'd be willing to bet that Kyle has never stopped loving you."
Britt leaned forward. "Oh, that would explain a lot."
I tapped my fingers on the table. "You think?"
They both nodded and Autumn declared, "Definitely. It's clear in the way he looks at you."
I eyed him in my periphery. Seeing him happy made me smile. When I returned my attention to the women they were both staring at me with mischievous grins. "What?" I asked.
Autumn folded her arms on top of the table. "You look at him the same way."
"I don't know..." I protested, but it was weak.
Britt replied, "Take it from someone who lives and breathes love and dating: the two of you have it bad."
"But, that's oh so good," Autumn finished.
I picked up my beer glass, forgetting that it was empty, then put it back down. Of course I loved Kyle. I'd never stopped loving him despite everything that had happened. Two people couldn't possibly be as close as we'd been and not retain at least some of those feelings for life. But was I in love with him? And there it was. The question that had gotten us into trouble all those years ago. We'd come full circle, but this time I was determined not to let history repeat itself.
37
Kyle
The night tour at the firehouse had been a long one. We'd run our balls off mostly for bullshit medical calls. One woman had actually called the fire department because her kid had a splinter...at one in the morning. Just when you thought you'd seen it all on this job, something happened to prove you wrong.
I pulled the lever on the recliner in the lounge and cradled my coffee as I leaned against the headrest, resting my eyes.
"Hogan, can I ask you something?" Lt. Bryce McNamara asked from the chair beside me. He was the Ladder lieutenant on shift that tour.
I didn't bother to move or open my eyes. "What's up?"
"Would I be completely insane for wanting Alicia back?"
I opened one eye and glanced at him from my periphery. "Is this like a hypothetical or are you seriously considering it?”
"She was my wife, man."
"Right
, but she cheated on you."
He sighed. "We've been through a lot together, though. Trauma creates some strong bonds."
I opened both eyes and lifted my head. "Where is this coming from?"
He cracked his knuckles and said in a near whisper, "I miss her, man."
"She left you for another guy, Mack."
"We were together for nine years. You ever love someone for that long? It doesn't just go away. Feelings don't dissolve the second the divorce papers are signed." They'd had a particularly nasty divorce that had finally ended a few months prior.
"Believe it or not, bro, I know exactly what you mean."
He eyed me quizzically. "You do?"
I nodded.
"How'd you get over it?"
I bit the inside of my cheeks. "I haven't."
"Fuck, man."
"But lucky for me, I'm getting a second chance."
He jolted to the edge of his seat. "Hold up. Are you for real?"
My grin was response enough.
"Shit, well that explains a lot."
I cocked my head.
He laughed. "The guys have a poll going on which stripper from Sapphire you'd managed to charm. You've gotta admit, man, you've been walking around here like a new man lately."
"A fucking stripper? Are you kidding me?"
"It was either that or a badge bunny."
I shook my head and snorted. "Hell, no."
He shrugged. "Considering you don't date, those were the best options."
Our conversation ended abruptly when the tones went off, calling us to a 10-75, which was a full response for a confirmed fire. We leapt from our chairs and sprinted to the pole. After sliding down, we each headed to the officer's seat on our respective rigs. More information came through en route telling us we were going to a fully involved fire in an attached home. Attached homes were a bitch because one house on fire could quickly multiply since they shared walls with others.
"Fuck," I exclaimed before turning around to address my men. "We've got high wind gusts tonight boys, let's not lose a whole city block."
From two avenues away, the dark smoke was visible in the blue sky along with a faint orange glow. As we pulled up, I got on my radio to announce our arrival on scene. "Dispatch, E11 is 10-84 at 326 West 87th."
"10-4, E11."
Neighbors were screaming that people were still inside. Our house was first on scene, which meant that Mack or I had to be Incident Commander until a higher ranked officer arrived. He pointed at me and shouted, "I'm going in, we've got people trapped." As a ladder company, their job was to locate victims, so it made sense for me to hang back to direct the scene.
I assessed what we were dealing with and immediately got on the radio. "Dispatch, we need a second alarm at 326 West 87th. Confirmed people trapped. We've got fire out the windows in three houses and we've got flames threatening to jump the alley." For a 10-75, four Engines and three Ladders would respond along with the chiefs, but from my assessment, that wouldn't be enough. Calling for a second alarm would essentially double the number of responding units as well as send additional support personnel.
I hollered to my nozzleman, "Hit the alley on the four-side and protect the exposure." For clarity purposes, we referred to sides of buildings by a number: one through four. The one-side was the front and it went around clockwise, meaning the four-side was the right of the building.
The winds whistled down the alley and I knew we were in trouble. I ran to my rig. Valenti, the chauffeur had hooked up to the hydrant and was priming the pump while my nozzleman, Eger, was piling hose lengths onto his shoulder.
"This bitch is gonna jump the alley. Hurry the fuck up," I ordered, pushing them to move quicker.
The radio squelched. "L171 to Incident Command."
"Go 171," I replied.
"We've got a twenty-pound propane tank on the first floor on the one side of the middle involved home. Tank looks like it's been converted into a heater."
"Motherfucker." That wasn't good. "10-4 171. All personnel at 326 West 87th evacuate. We've got a 10-80. Moving to exterior operations." The 10-80 code let them know we had a haz-mat incident. As I updated Dispatch, Engine 13 pulled up.
Four of the five L171 guys that had gone inside scrambled out of the building. I got on the radio to my unit. "E11 shut down the line and move to cover the 10-80. E13, hook up and cover the alley on the four side."
I ran to the guys on L171 to find out where their fifth man was. With their gear and masks, it was nearly impossible to tell who they were unless I read the names on the back of their bunker coats, so I asked, "Who's missing."
"Lt. Mack," one of them replied.
I hit my transmitter. "IC to L171 lieutenant. Confirm evacuating." Then, I turned back to the men. "What house did he go into?"
The guys pointed to the one on the far right.
"You sure?"
"Yes, lieutenant."
"Which window is the propane tank closest to?"
The guy who I assumed had transmitted the message pointed to the one beside the front stoop in the middle house.
"All right. Evacuate the houses, starting with the one across the alley." I gestured to the one I meant, then I ran to my nozzleman and pointed at the window. "You get water into that window like it's a carnival game, understood?"
"Yes, lieutenant."
"But don't get too close, stay on the road," I warned.
Still no sign of Mack. "Dammit." I transmitted again. "IC to L171 lieutenant. Confirm evacuating."
Engine 13 was moving into place to cover the alley and Ladder 64 arrived on scene. Back on the radio. "L64 standby as FAST. We have one firefighter unaccounted for." The company assigned as FAST or Firefighter Assist and Search Team was solely dedicated to performing search and rescue for firefighters in distress. Dylan was on L64, but I wasn't sure if he was working or not.
A civilian wailed in the distance, "My husband is inside."
I didn't have time to think about how my call to evacuate was leaving civilians trapped inside the inferno. As an officer, it was my job to make those tough calls and with the threat of a propane tank indoors, I simply couldn't risk doing a search and rescue.
I tried Mack one more time. "IC to L171 lieutenant. Status!"
Engine 19 arrived on scene.
"IC to E19, stretch a line to the front and help E11 cover this tank," I ordered.
Still no sign of Mack, I made the call. "L64 prepare to go in as FAST to the third house in search of L171 lieutenant, Bryce McNamara."
"Fuck," I spat through my teeth. I realized I'd screwed up and jumped on the radio. "E13 shut down the line in the alley and cover the middle involved house from the one side." That would put all three operating hose lines on the middle unit housing the propane tank. Since Mack was trapped in the unit on the right, between the alley and the house with the propane tank, if I kept hose lines operating on both sides, it would essentially sandwich the fire, forcing it into the unit where Mack was trapped. I prayed the damage hadn't already been done. I'd given Engine 13 their orders before I knew which unit Mack was in and I should've called them off then, but it was fucking hectic and I'd screwed up.
I had to risk the fire jumping the alley because it was more important to keep the propane tank stable so it didn't BLEVE (explode) and cause a much bigger problem. Especially with guys inside. Once Engine 13 was in place, I issued an order, "L64 go," while praying that I wasn't sending them to their deaths.
I stood back and watched as four firefighters breached the house. One of the names on the jackets read, Palmer and another, Hogan. My stomach turned over.
Battalion Chief Richards finally arrived on scene and I ran over to meet him and get him up to speed so he could take over as Incident Commander. "Chief, we've got confirmed fire in these three houses and it's threatening to jump the alley." I pointed to the middle house. "There's a twenty-pound propane tank on the one side of that house. All three Engines are in place to prevent a BLEVE." I gestur
ed to the house on the right. "Engine 171 lieutenant was conducting a primary search of that unit. He has been out of radio communication since the evacuation order. Ladder 64, acting as FAST, is in there now."
"Nice work, Lieutenant. Stick by me." He got on the radio and called a third alarm, requesting even more units. The fourth engine arrived and they were put on exterior attack of the far left unit. I stared at the door that Dylan and Jace had run into and nearly held my breath in anticipation of seeing them exit. If there was a BLEVE while they were inside...
No, I couldn't go there.
Chief Richards hit his transmitter. "L64 status report."
"Nothing yet."
I pressed my palms together and brought my hands up to my chin as we waited.
And waited.
And waited.
After what felt like fucking forever, we got a report. "L64 to IC."
"Go L64."
"L171 lieutenant located with two civilians. Exiting now."
"10-4," the chief acknowledged.
I rocked on my heels.
A minute later, bodies shoved through the doorway, emerging from the thick, black smoke. I counted helmets. All were accounted for. Thank you, Dad.
Then there was a loud boom, sending glass, brick, and wood flying.
"Was there only one tank?" Chief Richards asked.
"That's all that was reported."
He scratched his face. "All right, we're moving to interior." He hit his transmitter and began assigning companies.
I rushed to Dylan who was crouched beside Mack. "What happened?"
Mack, out of breath, coughed out. "House is filled with garbage. A pile of crap...fell over trapping me...in the back with the two vics." He pointed to his radio. "Fucking stopped working."
We'd gotten damn lucky. That could've been a serious disaster. I looked up and saw the flames licking the eaves on the building across the alley. "Dammit." I got on my radio, "The fire has jumped." Then I ran back to the chief.
It had taken us four hours to get the fire under control. In the end, five homes had been affected, three civilians had been seriously injured, and four had been treated for smoke inhalation. I was supposed to go on a date with Allie that night, but I was in a piss-poor mood, so I'd texted her and canceled. Even though I'd showered before leaving the firehouse, by the time I got home, I felt like I needed another one. The smoke stench was burned into my nostrils. Once I felt clean...well, cleaner, I tugged on sweatpants, collapsed on my couch, and stared up at the ceiling.
