Finding Patience

by Eden Rose

  “Baby, come on.”

  Looking at Kate over Brett’s shoulders, I can tell that everyone is getting frustrated with me. The last thing that I want to do is piss people off but I have to do what I have to do. And that is staying with Brett.

  “Time to leave, guys. I will talk to you later.”

  Brett’s smile on his face is contagious and I can’t help myself but break out in a cheesy grin. I lean over to kiss him. His lips are soft, luscious and all too addictive.

  Kate tries to hide her smile on her face but I know she’s happy for me. She has to fake being pissed off at me to prove that she’s in control of the situation. “Fine. I’ll be at your house at noon tomorrow to discuss damage control. It will be best if we can release an interview. Are you sure this is something that you want to do?”

  RABIES

  From the look on this skirt’s face, I can tell she’s talking to me. “Patience is my wife and I’m not gonna leave her.”

  The body guards are chuckling from the corner and I glare at them. “What’s so funny, chuckles?” I spit at them.

  The one that Patience called Skin is the one that talks to me first. “You have no idea how popular your ‘wife’ is, do you? You realize that you’re going to be followed. Investigated. Rumors spread. Everything you’ve done in your life is going to be broadcasted across the world. Patience’s life isn’t her own anymore. I hope you know what you’re stepping into.”

  He doesn’t give me a chance to respond. The three people that have fucked over our night are walking out the door and I finally have Patience to myself again.

  Cupping her cheeks in my hands, I lean down to kiss her gently. My tongue massages the opening of her lips to get her to let me in. We both moan as our tongues slide against each other. She’s heaven and sin all rolled up into one.

  “Where do we go from here?”

  I consider the answer to her question. Where do we go from here? “I don’t know but I’m willing to find out. What about you?”

  She nods. “What’s with the leather? What’s with your Sons Of Anarchy motif?”

  It’s my turn to chuckle. “Baby, we’ve got a lot to talk about but first, I want to meet my daughter. I want to see if she’s as beautiful as her mother.”

  “So, uh, I don’t, uh… Wait. Let me get dressed and we can go.”

  Without saying anything to her about her outfit before, I go about getting dressed too.

  I slip into my cut, adjusting it so it’s nice and straight, I feel my phone vibrate again. Fuck. It’s probably The Bear or Slice trying to figure out where the hell I’m at.

  Pulling it out of my pocket, I read through the missed fucking text messages from everyone.

  PREZ: Where the fuck r u?

  PREZ: You need to call me NOW!

  SLICE: Prez is flippin out cuz you are on the news with some chick

  PREZ: I’m havin my wife track ur phone

  PREZ: There better be a good reason why u r ignorin ur prez

  FLIP: Where are you, man? I’m out looking for you at some hotel

  SLICE: That’s it, mother fucker.

  The hair on the back of my neck begins to rise while I think about the shit show that’s about to happen. These mother fuckers are about to come in here and bust the fantasy of this actually going good. God damn it!

  “Baby?” I call through the bathroom door that she’s currently behind. “You about ready?”

  It’s muffled behind the door but it sounds almost as if she said she’s showering.

  After four hot rounds of sex, my dick still jumps at the thought of sliding into her from behind while the shower head is pushed between her thighs. The way her body would shake as she screams my name. The echoes of those screams bouncing off the shower walls.

  Fuck!

  “Rabies! Rabies, man! Where the fuck are ya?”

  My back goes rigid. “Patience, stay in the bathroom!” I demand.

  I’m not ready to introduce her to the brothers just yet. We’ll get there eventually, but we need time together and we won’t get it after they come in here.

  “Rabies!” The Bear hollers through the hall without a care in the world.

  I step into the hall, standing in front of half the brotherhood. “Where’s the fire?” I ask uncommitedly.

  I’m hoping if I give them the idea that I’m not up to anything, they will leave us alone. Stupid, stupid me.

  “What’s this about some pop star you ran off with?” Slice asks with his lip curled up in amusement.

  Shrugging, I look behind me to make sure she’s not coming out the bathroom. I feel like a fucking dumb ass right now, but it’s true. We need time to be together. Not that I don’t want her to meet them, this is just too much.

  I hold my hands out to stop them from coming in. “Look, I’ve got a lot to talk to you about, but right now, I need space.”

  Asking for space in front of the president is probably wone of the dumbest things I could do.

  “Space?” The Bear asks with his eye brow raised. “Brothers, he needs space because he’s fuckin’ some bitch that’s outside of his rank!”

  His words sting but I try to ignore him. I know exactly that he’s telling the truth to me and to everyone else.

  What kind of life can I offer Patience? I’m a landscaper and a biker. She’s used to hanging out with men who star in movies and grace the covers of magazines. I’m just a leather cladded biker who likes to play in the dirt.

  My heart races faster and faster as the thoughts of doubt filter in. I can’t lose her.

  The bathroom door creaks open and I don’t even need to turn around to know that Patience is in the room. I can hear and feel every one of the brothers looking at her like she’s a piece of meat.

  “Uh, hi,” she mumbles.

  I turn on my feet to shield her from the eyes of my brothers. I know they are wondering how the hell I landed someone so beautiful. How can I explain something that I don’t even know myself? How can I explain to them that I was just a lucky bastard who fell in love with an angel five years ago? I was just the luckiest bastard in the world who got her to marry me and knocked her up.

  I’m just a lucky man.

  “Holy shit,” Flip mutters.

  Holy shit indeed, brother.

  “Who’s this?” Slice asks with that cocky smile on his face that he gets whenever he’s looking at Jen. Man, Jen would be pissed the fuck off right now if she knew he was looking at my wife like this.

  Knowing that I need to introduce them, I wrap Patience in my arms, holding her as close as possible to my chest. I need her to be close to me. “Brothers, I would like you to meet Patience Monroe-Booker. My wife.”

  PATIENCE

  Imagine my surprise while I’m in the bathroom washing the rounds of lovemaking off my body when I hear the rough voices of men in the hotel room. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that they didn’t belong to my body guards. I had pissed them off too badly for them to come back.

  I open the bathroom door after making sure that my hair was in some sort of style and my clothes were on appropriately. Holy shit!

  Standing in the hallway in front of the hotel room, has to be the makings of a fantasy I didn’t know I had. There stood ten men wearing leather, jeans, a sexy scowl and all of them were standing next to Brett. I squeeze my thighs together as discreetly as possible. These men are HOT!

  Brett introduces me to them and the smiles on their faces are smiles that I have become used to. They like what they see.

  My stomach shoots a hunger pain through my body and I place my hand over my stomach to ease it away. The last thing that I need to think about is how hungry I am or the last time that I ate. Brett used to be very protective of me and I know he would be pissed off when he found out how long it’s been since I last ate.

  With my eyes glazing over from the fog of the shower’s heat, I blink them a couple of times as Brett introduces me to everyone. When he called me his wife, I still got the shivers I wou
ld get five years ago.

  Each of the bikers are hot in their own ways but the one that’s hottest is Brett, of course. Close second is The Bear. He’s got this growling look on his face with a look of danger.

  Slice, Flip, Trip and some older man named Bic, take turns in looking me up and down. I smile at them.

  “Is this that chick that’s got our club’s patch all over social media?” The Bear growls at Brett but is looking at me with disdain.

  I just met them and they already hate me. This is so not fucking cool. I cower a little in the warm heat of Brett.

  “Look, we’ve got a lot to discuss and shit. Its best you guys go home,” Brett states while holding me tighter.

  “No! My concern is our fuckin’ club’s patch on Facebook and some gossip mags talkin’ about who we are and shit. Who is this chick?” The Bear asks.

  A different voice answers him. “She’s a pop star that Jen’s obsessed with.”

  I smile a little.

  “Fine, you got two days to get it figured out. I need you back at the clubhouse.”

  They leave without saying goodbye to me or Brett but I really don’t care. I’m too happy to have him in my arms right now. I never thought I would see him again.

  “Baby, you ready to get out of here?”

  “Yeah,” I reply while unlatching my body from his. “You ready to meet our daughter?”

  My thoughts run towards how confused Alexa is going to be when she meets her dad that was supposedly dead. I know that shit is going to get harder before it gets easier. I just didn’t realize how hard it was going to be.

  RABIES

  I feel like I’m turning my back on my brothers but I have to think about my family right now. Up until two days ago, I didn’t even know that I still had a family. Now, they are all I can think about. My mind is completely immersed with the thoughts of Patience and Alexa.

  How it would feel to be a family. How it would feel to teach her how to ride a motorcycle. Playing tea party with her or whatever little girls like to do.

  I can’t wait to do it all with Patience.

  I’m refusing to think about the fact that my marriage with Patience is going to be different than what I had originally thought all those years ago. This Patience is an international pop star with body guards and publicists.

  Not the same woman I left all those years ago.

  While we’re leaving the hotel, I see a mob of people standing in front of the door with cameras pointing at us. I shield Patience in my cut while walking out. “Don’t worry, baby. We got this,” I try to soothe her.

  She giggles against my chest. “This is nothing, babe. Sorry, but your vest isn’t going to hide me from them.”

  “Cut, baby. It’s a cut.”

  “Whatever,” she rolls her eyes and wiggles out of my grasp.

  The first bastard that approaches us with his camera, I almost punch in the face. My instincts from the Army come back into play so quickly in a fucking rush of an ambush. Shoving my way through the arms and cameras that are being shoved in our faces, I finally get us to the edge of the lot where my bike is parked.

  “Patience! Is it true…”

  “Patience, how do you feel about your husband…”

  “Patience, who is your husband and why did you say he was dead?”

  “Patience, who is this guy who broke someone’s hand yesterday?”

  My instincts are to shove these fucking pricks back and leave us alone but I don’t do it. Why? I don’t fucking know but I wanted to. I want them to know that they can’t be rushing her or hounding her like this.

  Patience takes everything for what it is and waves while walking in front of me. Correction, she’s not walking in front of me, I have my arm wrapped around her waist to hold her to me. I need to keep touching her to make sure she’s real.

  I’m a fucking mess of a man.

  “I will release an official statement at a later time. Thank you for your concern,” she says with her honey voice that makes me want to kiss the shit out of her mouth.

  Even her words are sweet.

  “Patience! Since when do you hang out with bikers? Is this something new?”

  “What are you going to do about your daughter now that her dad is supposedly home?”

  “Does this happen all the time?” I ask her while leading her away from everyone.

  The second I see my bike, I about run towards it. The safety and the feeling of freedom are what I need right now from my bike. Suddenly, I begin to realize that this shit isn’t going to be like it was before.

  Nothing is.

  *

  With Patience pressed against my back and pointing out the directions to her parents’ new house, I feel better about everything. Shit has to go right. There’s no other way it could go.

  She tugs on my shirt to get me to turn left down a long dirt road. I turn the bike to follow the winding road until we reach a Southern Plantation style mansion. Inwardly, I chuckle at how funny this is. Of course her parents would live in a mansion that their daughter gave them.

  Why wouldn’t they?

  My wife is a child prodigy of music and her parents always took advantage of her and her talents.

  Before she turned into a pop star, she used to sing classical music, opera. None of this shitty music on kids’ radios.

  I turn the bike off, steady my feet onto the ground so she could get off the bike and let myself off of it. The second I place my feet on the ground, a wave of adrenaline wages through me.

  I’m about to meet my daughter for the first time.

  Patience puts her hand on my arm and squeezes it. “Are you ready?”

  I nod my head while plucking her hand off my arm to kiss it. “Baby, I’m more ready than I have ever been.”

  Truth is, I’m fucking petrified. What happens if Alexa hates me? Holy fuck! I hate feeling like I’m not in control of the situation. It’s killing me.

  I look in her eyes and see that they are full of confusion too. “Why you look worried?” I question her.

  “Uh, our daughter thinks you’re dead and I just found out you are alive a few hours ago? The fact that I mourned for you for all those years and you’ve been alive. The fact that you’ve been alive this whole time and I didn’t even know about it. The fact that our lives have been forever changed.”

  Each word that she says is a stab at my gut. I know what she’s feeling right now and I feel like a piece of shit about what my mother did. There’s nothing I can do about it now though because it’s done.

  Placing my hands on her hips, I pull her to me and then lean down to kiss her lips. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

  The front door opens and out runs a child with brown curly hair. It’s the craziest feeling in the world to meet your child for the first time.

  “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” Alexa cries out and jumps up into Patience’s arms.

  I move out of the way to watch them interact with each other. Seeing her be a mom is something that I’ve dreamed about for years but never thought I would actually see. She’s so caring, nurturing.

  I’m the lucky bastard that knocked her up all those years ago.

  “Mommy, who’s that?”

  “Brett Booker?”

  PATIENCE

  How do I explain to my five year old daughter that her dad didn’t die? He’s been alive this whole time and I didn’t even know about it?

  Talk about some Jerry Springer shit.

  “Brett Booker?”

  The voice of my father shakes me out of my self doubt of how to explain to Alexa that her dad is alive. Shit!

  “Daddy,” I mumble to stop him from saying something that he would regret.

  “I thought I told you that she moved on! I thought I told you to stay away from her!” My father yells from the top of the stairs.

  Alexa’s body tightens with the sounds of her grandpa yelling. She’s not one to like the sounds of people yelling. Hell, she doesn’t like to watch a lot of television beca
use of that reason. “Grandpa!”

  Brett’s standing next to me stoically while watching my face. “You came to my house?” I ask him.

  Leaning over, I pick up Alexa to hold her close. I need her to be my safety blanket right now.

  The sun is beginning to rise and so is the heat with it. I look around the house and property that I bought my parents. It’s what they wanted. A mile of land and a Plantation style mansion.

  “Yeah.”

  “You came looking for me?” I ask him stupidly.

  He smiles at me. “Baby, of course I did. I meant it when I proposed to you and when we got married.”

  “You’re married?” My father gasps from the porch.

  “Fuck,” I mutter.

  “You said a bad word!” Alexa scolds me.

  “Dad, please!” I beg.

  “This isn’t going to end well. I hope you know what you’re doing here because I’m not going to be here to pick you back up again when it falls apart.”

  The front door slams shut.

  Once it’s just the three of us in the middle of the front lawn, I feel a sense of happiness rushing through me. Brett’s here and hopefully we can make it work.

  We have to make it work, right?

  “Mommy,” Alexa calls while tugging on the bottom of my dress. “Who that?”

  I squat down until I’m eye level with her and kiss her nose. “That, sweet cheeks, is your dad.”

  The different levels of emotions that are flashing over her five-year-old face is almost too much for me. First, there is confusion, then happiness, then confusion, then happiness again.

  “Nu uh.”

  I look over at Brett and smile at him. He must sense me begging him to talk to her because he gets down to her level too. “I’m your dad, Alexa.”

  “My daddy’s with angels.”

  I giggle a little out of nervousness. When she began asking where her daddy was and why she didn’t have one, I told her he was with angels. Which was true at the time. I didn’t lie to my kid about that.

  Rubbing my hand over her little back, I bring her closer. “When you get older, we will talk more about this. This is your daddy, sweet cheeks.”

  Her little eyes well up full of tears making me feel like shit. There’s no easy way to spring this on a kid. Hell, there’s no easy way to spring this on anybody. I remember my emotions were all over the place when I found out he was alive and I knew she would need time to figure it out.