The Masked Poet

by Albert Enang Eng Usang

  - Many divorcees had love as their marital pillar before they separated.

  - All well then, yours is not going to be like theirs! Show some belief! Why don't you rather think yours will be a successful model for others instead?

  He kept silent as he considered her apt advice. Actually, she has been very logical in the conversation to his shame, and it finally got to him.

  'I'm sorry for sounding so defeatist.' He owned up. 'I hope you understand my concerns.'

  'Sweetheart, I do, but believe me, everything is going to be alright.' She replied.

  - Then I need sometime to think about it.

  - Again?

  - I'm sorry but I need it. I really need to sit and think.

  - MP, what trick do you have up your sleeve this time?

  - No, no, no. Don't be presumptive please; I would very much be around.

  - So you promised the last time.

  - I'm so sure I won't go the last route this time around.

  - But MP, why do I always have to push you before you stride in love?

  - Really? Has that been the case?

  - Yes..........like all the way.

  - Let's not bicker over that. Please can I have sometime for thinking?

  - One week. And don't play games, you know you don't have the temerity to do that. If you try any, I will be waiting on the wings; you know what I mean right?

  - Don't worry, what happened in 1986 won't happen again.

  - Hold it! Better don't make me laugh. You have not created any atmosphere for such luxury here.

  - I said in 1986, President Ronald Reagan of the United States proposed to my grand mother!

  - Indeed! Tell that to the marines!(giggling).

  - And you know what happened afterwards?

  - What?

  - My grand mother passed out from disbelief and by the time she came to, President Reagan was gone!

  - Ha ha ha ha............ Gone to where?

  - Back to America of course.

  - You mean he came all the way from the US to propose to your grandmother?

  - Yes na. But you know the funniest part of it all?

  - What was it?

  - My grandmother actually wanted to say yes before she passed out.

  - Ha ha ha ha......... So she lost a lifetime opportunity?

  - You see what I mean?

  - You! So you've succeeded in making me laugh right? Better get prepared to make me laugh like this all my life by doing the right thing in a week's time or.........

  He didn't wait for a week. To her surprise, three days later, he invited her for a date at the First Date Eatery, this time, in the VIP lounge, and not in their usual garden spot.

  'Sweetness.' He called.

  'Yes soul charmer.' She reciprocated.

  - Do you really love me?

  - You know that question is unnecessary. I absolutely love you, with my whole being. I've never loved a man as much as l love you. Not even President Reagan coming from the US!

  Ha ha ha ha ha ................ They both went.

  'Promise then,' he resumed, 'when we married, you'll never leave me.'

  - I promise wholeheartedly.

  - Unconditionally?

  - My love is unconditional.

  - Can you attach proof to your promise if l ask?

  - Where are you headed to?

  - Obvious: a blood oath.

  - I can do it but I don't need that to prove l love you. People don't do that anymore. Take my word of promise and hold me by that. By the way, I thought you are a born again christian, isn't a blood covenant unbiblical?

  - It is, and I know; I'm only pulling your leg. Even if you have agreed, I wouldn't permit it. I just want to be sure you mean your promise.

  - I give you assu....ran....ce......with my word.

  - Okay then.

  Next, he gave a signal by clapping twice and some pre-planned activity began. First, a waiter approached their table and cleared off the dishes. Almost immediately, another followed with a small ceramic bowl full of scentful red flowery petals. She littered all on the table. The scent from them was so aromatic Delight wished it was delectable. She was all the same surprised at what was going on, not grasping it yet. Then, from above them, red ribbony flakes were set free as they descended lightly on them, flake after flake. While that continued, the same musical instrumentalists on the previous date where he sang joined them at the table, surrounding them, playing at the same time. Other customers in the lounge got attracted by the romantic atmosphere at that point in the lounge and stared on in excitement. Then he brought out a casing before her, opened it and allowed the shinny rays of the diamond ring on it to reflect into her eyes. While she stared at the ring flabbergasted, he began:

  Marriage is an open banquet

  sequel to engagements in secret

  today, by a gesture so discreet

  after vetting many beauties

  and rejecting many mermaids

  I come to enlighten you

  that many angels wooed me

  I looked at their faces

  then I looked at yours

  I looked at their minds

  then I looked at yours

  only to discover

  you shine brightest in beauty

  you shine brightest in intellectuality

  you shine brightest in personality.

  I have fallen for you!

  I have fallen for you!

  A suicide belt's on my chest

  marry me else I blow it off!

  marry me or l will die!

  Delight, will you marry me?

  She was overwhelmed. Tears flowed down her cheeks freely, uncontrollably. The Masked Poet remained kneeling, a position he assumed before saying the last line. Still tearful, she got up, knelt before him as well as she said calmly:

  Yes I will, yes I will

  with all my heart I will

  marry you, yes I will!

  While they embraced and kissed. The whole crowd of dinners in the lounge rose to applaud them. Then, the music began to play. He unfolded his embracing arms as they both looked each other in the eye. Next, he started singing:

  Bone of my bone

  flesh of my flesh

  darling I love you

  sweety I love you

  come with me

  let's go away

  come with me

  lets make our home

  come with me

  to marriage's paradise

  Chorus:

  Darling I love you

  like Jesus loves me

  sweety I love you

  like Jesus loves me

  so lets go away.

  He repeated the stanza and chorus, hanging on to the last line -.'so lets go away' - for about four times before he stopped. The small crowd applauded again, this time to the song.

  But she did something. She forced a resumption of the song as she imposed her own lyrics on the song's choral beat:

  Honey where do you

  want me to go to?

  Charmer I'll go to

  Where ere you want me

  so lets go away.

  Honey to the east

  I'll go there with you

  charmer to the west

  I'll go there with you

  so lets go away.

  Honey to heaven

  I'll be by your side

  and in the desert

  I'll never leave you

  so lets go away.

  They embraced and kissed again passionately, as they were greeted to a third round of a very vociferous ovation from the felicitating impromptu witnesses of customers.

  When they got up, he bowed as she curtsied to the applauders 360°.

  'Thank you, thank you.'

  'Thank you, thank you, God bless you.'

  Subsequently, they wasted no time. They called for a.press briefing to inform all and sundry they were engaged to be married in months. The press reciprocate their gesture as the Sun news
paper made it a cover page headline, and the most captivating of all the dailies with the bold caption:

  'BEAUTY WEDS THE POET'

  The biggest celebrity wedding in Nigeria yet!

  It is on November 18th.

  When the presidency received news of the forth coming marriage, she asked the couple to choose a venue anywhere on earth, choose the best wedding planner of their choice, and all associated auxiliaries as she was footing the wedding bill including an exclusive two month honey moon vacation in the most exquisite international destination of their choice...............................

  Wow!!!!!......................

  CHAPTER 28

  'Hello soul charmer.'

  'Hello hottest cupcakes!'

  - I'm so bored because I miss my charmer.

  - Oh ohhhh!........ Sorry dear. But how do I remedy your boredom?

  - Exactly, tomorrow evening at the Lovers flower garden .

  - Provided the boredom doesn't worsen by then. That's far off you know.

  - Eaaaayyyy......... Looks like someone is missing me too!

  - Ah ah......... It is true na. I miss you die!*

  - So you want the time moved forward?

  - Yes. This evening.

  - Okay soul charmer, but I want to inform this meeting would be quite a grave one. So prepare, we really have issues to thrash out.

  - Like that of Romeo and Juliet? I mean, the grave?

  - Chei! Your mum wasted her money sending you to school (laughing). For all your schooling you don't know what a simple term like 'grave'

  * I miss you die!(pidgin = l miss you like mad!)

  means? Gosh! What a waste!

  - Actually I used to know until your love turned me into a dullard, a romantic one though and I kinda like it. So, it's all your fault!

  - Really? But you've not done anything 'dullard' for me yet.

  - Is that? Okay then, today, I will take you to my neighbourhood, there's an open latrine somewhere around, due for evacuation. I will jump into it and swim in it for you.

  - What?

  - Then I will come out of it that way and walk miles, telling everyone I meet: 'I'm in love with Delight!' That would be a class act right?

  - Ha ha ha ha......... Jezzzzz........ You will do no such thing! Please , it's okay eh, don't do anything 'dullard' for me again.

  - Ah ah? But I'm your dullard now.

  - Don't be again. You will be such a weird dullard! Please see you this evening.

  - This evening, I will do something 'dullard' at the Lovers flower garden!

  - Ha ha ha ha............. Don't o. See you then soul charmer.

  - Okay love. Bye.

  That evening at the Lovers flower garden, surrounded by myriads of all sorts of flowers, Delight sent the tone of the conversation.

  'My love, like I told you earlier on phone, with ten weeks to our marriage, there are four issues I want resolved between us. The first is you, Raymond.'

  - Ha ha ha ha.............. You bring up that name again. That's not my name, I already told you.

  - No Raymond, you are Raymond.

  - I'm not Raymond.

  - Then how come a man who says he loves me is yet to tell me his real name leaving me at the mercy of the general nomenclature: the Masked Poet.

  - I'm sorry. Really sorry. It's an oversight. It rarely occurred to me I've not told you yet. I got carried away by love and assumed. My name is Robert Osareyong.

  - Hmmnnn........... Roberto....... My Spanish, no, Mexican fiance! .......... Sexy name!

  - Yesss........ Mrs. Roberto Osareyong to be. Delight weds Roberto you know.

  - Ha ha ha....... I just can't wait for it! Okay now, so, that brought no avalanche of sub issues with it and I consider it thrashed as I give it a tick on the agenda. The second is about meeting your folks starting with your mother. Mine already know you, so introductions would rather be easier. When then, are you taking me to meet your mum and extended family?

  - Next week. We will spend the weekend there too.

  - Good! Thrashed as well! The third issue is about me to you. I actually have been nursing a fear about you and that's no thanks to your mysterious resistances towards my loving advances. It is very sensitive and I please want you to handle it maturely.

  - Go on. What is it?

  - I ask again like I once asked; dear Roberto, are you by any means impotent?

  - No, dear Roberta; I'm not.

  - I'm sorry but that is the suspicion I have regarding your resistances towards love. You know, most men who behave the way you do eventually own up to suffering from such a malady but only after they have gotten what they want which is marriage. I hope it's not the case with you.

  - No, it isn't.

  - Can you prove it?

  - Which bed would we use? The one in your flat or my own bed?

  - Come on! Be serious!

  - I thought you want us to have hot sex?

  - Robert! Look, I'm not joking here, please stop! And stop having immoral ideas as well.

  - Ha ha ha............ Until comedians turned up, jokes used to be free. Just laugh it off girl.

  - There would be ample time to laugh latter. I'm not in that mood.

  - How then do you want me to prove my virility? Just to tell you; it is twice a stallion's.... Ha ha ha........

  - What on earth is wrong with this clown? How come you know your virile capability when you've never had sex before?

  - The fruit is as the tree itself. I am the true son of my father! Ha ha ha..........

  - MP, I mean, Robert, stop distracting me. Just wait, in 10weeks time, I will witness that virility of yours the way you want it proven.

  - So, like I asked; how do you want me to prove it?

  - Can I please book you appointments with two doctors? Pleaseeee........

  - No problem. But it is not fair.

  - How do you mean?

  - I'm not bothered about your fertility neither have I asked you to prove it.

  - Hon, understand me please. This wouldn't have come up if you never behaved suspiciously over time.

  - Its okay, I will see as many doctors as you want even if you wish to take me to them now. About that joke on sex, it remains what it is - a joke. We will do it only after marrying; on the wedding night you know.

  - I knew, I knew you were joking. Permit me to appreciate the fact this is a very sensitive matter and l feel honoured the way you approached it and your emotional intelligence cum maturity as well.

  - Anything for my sweetness.

  - That's why you are my soul charmer.

  - You can say that again.

  - Now to the last item. But before then, please listen to this short song:

  When will I see your face?

  when will I see your face?

  Sweet sweet love

  when will I see your face?

  or won't I ever see your face?......

  - Oooppssss! ............ Timely song, sweet song, sweet singing.

  - Thanks deary. But answer the question please. When am I going to see the face behind the Mask? When will my subjection to its imaginary looks end?

  He was silent for a while.

  'Robert?' She jerked him out of his silence.

  'Yes love.' He answered hesitantly.

  - I asked you a question.

  - This is a hard one. You know, it is a special identity. Not only that, it is a trademark, and the way it should be for a lifetime, for reputation's sake.

  - Nobody is disputing that, but I am going to be your wife and I have every right to demand I see your face.

  - You are perfectly right; so, become my wife first, and the rest like they say, will be history.

  - You mean I'm not seeing it until the wedding night?

  - Well grasped. You know, I only take it off in my home's recesses so no one else sees me and by it have an idea of what I look like. Should anyone see me, especially in this day and age of social networking, then I will no longer be the M
asked Poet and you can only imagine what that does to my business after founding it on a masked face.

  - So, in other words, I will be the only one who will be seeing it right?

  - Yes, subsequent upon the wedding night. Afterwards, our children too.

  - Okay, that's plausible. But know it now that should your face look more handsome than these masks, then we already have an ingredient for our first marital fight!

  - Really?

  - Yes o. That handsomeness must be publicly displayed for my marital pleasure.

  - How?

  - So people see you and congratulate me for catching handsome.

  - What if I'm not handsome?

  - Eh na, it is already on; we'll order for more colourful masks!

  Ha ha ha ha................ They laughed heartily.

  'What if I'm as ugly as a former president of Nigeria?' He incensed a comic relief.

  Ha ha ha ha ha ha.......... They went again.

  'That's more manageable than that Africa's ugliest man from Uganda!' She replied.

  They embarked on yet another round of laughter.

  'But seriously,' she emphasized, 'I am getting married to a talented super man and whatever face he has, provided it is human I'll take it.'

  - That's good to know; whatever face he has.

  - But sweetheart, how long have you been wearing these masks?

  - From childhood.

  - Really?

  - Yes.

  - How did that come about; I mean your connection to masks?

  - Before I began school, I took to it after watching the movie, 'the mask.' Have you seen that movie?

  - Yes I have.

  - I kind of liked the magical powers associated with that mask and I felt I will possess such powers if I wore a mask. So I asked my mom to get me one and ever since, I've been identified with it.

  - So your primary and secondary schools' authorities allowed it?

  - Yes, courtesy of special pleas by my mum. As for the university, I was given special permission partly by mum's intervention still, but more by my budding poetic abilities.