Last Christmas

by Kate Brian

Holmes's desk and out the door. She sat quietly in her chair as the classroom emptied, her insides writhing

  with nerves. She hated the idea of asking for more time, of losing Mr. Holmes's respect. But short of pissing

  Paige off even more than she already had, it was her only option.

  "Mr. Holmes?" Ariana's voice sounded small. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Can I ask you a

  question?" Mr. Holmes looked up from his crossword puzzle. "Of course, Miss Osgood," he smiled. "What

  can I do for you?"

  He had a way of making her feel calm, self-assured. She took a deep breath. "I was just wondering if I could

  get an extension on the paper? I'm leaving town tomorrow morning with my boyfriend, and-" She stopped,

  her face flushing. Why had she mentioned Daniel? A completely unnecessary detail, and not one that made

  her case any stronger. Her heart felt like lead in her chest as she saw Mr. Holmes slowly shaking his head.

  "I'm afraid not," he said, interlacing his ink-stained hands on the desk in front of him. "Ordinarily, I would,

  but I have to get final grades in to the registrar by Friday at noon. I'm sorry." Ariana's heart sank. "Right.

  Okay. Thanks anyway."

  She quickly rose from her chair and slipped out of the classroom before Mr. Holmes could say another word.

  Her face burned with humiliation. She knew she shouldn't have asked. It was a mistake. A mistake that she

  would now have to remedy by writing an A+ paper, since he was now going to be expecting something

  substandard. And she was going to have to pull this A+ paper out of thin air in a matter of hours. Otherwise,

  she was going to be forced to explain to Paige why she couldn't leave for Vermont tomorrow. And facing

  Paige was the last thing she wanted to do.

  NOT FRIENDS

  ***"Would you just pick something so we can get out of here?" Noelle snapped as she stood between two

  racks of windbreakers in downtown Easton's North Face store. With her flawless skin, Tiffany diamonds

  sparkling in her ears, and a Longchamp tote hanging from the crook of her arm, she looked like a mannequin

  that had accidentally been displayed in the wrong store.

  "Okay, what about this?" Ariana held up a ski hat-red, fleece, thermal. "Really? We've been standing in this

  hot-as-hell store for half an hour so you can buy him fleece?" Noelle said. "I don't understand. You already

  bought him a perfectly acceptable Christmas present." "I just wanted to get him something a little extra,"

  Ariana said, feeling deflated. "Then just get the hat and let's go. This place is giving me hives," Noelle said,

  adjusting her scarf. "I don't know...." Noelle groaned and slipped her sunglasses on. "Whatever. Come meet

  me at Sweet Nothings when you're done being obsessive."

  "I'm not being obsessive," Ariana replied. But Noelle was already gone, filling the store with cold air as she

  swept out. "I'm not," Ariana repeated quietly to herself as she fingered the red hat.

  But of course she was. The second she'd left Mr. Holmes's class, she'd felt this overwhelming need to buy

  Daniel the perfect pre-Christmas gift. True, she'd already gotten him a Tag Heuer watch engraved with his

  initials. But after her conversation with Paige, she realized that she needed to do something to prove her

  devotion to Daniel. And that something couldn't wait until Christmas Day.

  But now it was five fifty-five. She still hadn't started her paper, and the store was closing in five minutes.

  Ariana wanted more than anything to follow Noelle, to just leave, but she couldn't walk away. She had gotten

  it into her mind that she needed something more for Daniel, and she couldn't go back to Billings until she had

  found something. One of the salesgirls started cashing out her register while the beefy manager hung around

  by the door, his keys already out. Ariana suddenly felt stretched tight and panicky. Why had she convinced

  herself that the only thing that could bring her back to center was a stupid hat? Picking up a thick cashmere

  scarf, Ariana decided not to dwell on the nagging suspicion that it was because being worthy of Daniel

  went-in Paige's mind, at least-hand in hand with being worthy of Billings. And the idea that Paige might

  have heard Ariana and Thomas talking after morning assembly made Ariana sick to her stomach. But there

  was no way to be sure exactly what Paige knew, or what she suspected-and Paige would never come right

  out and say it. That would be too easy. A cryptic comment here, an icy stare there, until Ariana went insane.

  Slow, murderous torture. That was the Billings way.

  She sighed, put the scarf down, and examined the sleeve of a blue windbreaker. Suddenly a frigid hand

  clamped the back of her neck and Ariana's breath caught in her throat. She whirled around. Thomas Pearson

  smirked down at her. Even as her heart stopped beating and her neck tingled where he'd touched her, she

  forced her eyes to narrow in indignation.

  "What is your problem?" she snapped. "You shouldn't scare so easy," he replied with his irritatingly sexy

  smirk. A light dusting of snowflakes was scattered over his hair, and his nose and cheeks were flushed, his

  eyes bright. Adrenaline raced through Ariana's veins, making her entire body feel shaky. "What are you doing

  here?" She glanced quickly around. Apart from the salesgirl and the manager, there were only two other

  people in the store, both girls, but neither from Easton Academy.

  "Um, shopping?" He looked at her like she'd lost her mind. "Like you'd ever wear North Face," she replied,

  hoping her pounding heart wasn't visible through her sweater. "Aren't you more of a grunge boy than a ski

  rat?" "So now you're keeping tabs on my style?" Thomas raised an eyebrow. "Stop doing that," she

  demanded, trying to keep her voice low. She fought the urge to fan her cheeks. Had it been this hot in here

  just two minutes ago? "Doing what?" he smirked. "Acting like you know me. Like we're friends." Thick

  tension hovered in the space between them. God, she wanted to reach out and brush the snow out of his hair.

  Instead she turned away from him for a moment and grabbed the red hat up again. "We're not." "No kidding."

  He took a step closer to her. So close she could see that the blue right around his pupils was slightly darker

  than the rest of his eyes. Her heart thudded in her chest and her breath came out short and raspy. Because even

  though she was holding the hat she was about to buy for Daniel, she wanted to pull it over Thomas's dark hair

  and pull his lips to hers. She wasn't supposed to be attracted to someone like Thomas, someone who didn't

  make sense, someone who could make her lose control, someone who was right now leaning in to kiss her.

  She closed her eyes, feeling his warm breath, waiting for the contact. Suddenly, the clothing rack behind them

  jarred, sending Ariana tumbling forward into Thomas's chest. "Oops!" A girl's voice sounded on the other

  side of the rack. "Sorry." Heart pounding, Ariana pushed away from Thomas, her eyes darting around the

  back of the store. The walls were getting closer, pressing the racks of thick clothing in all around her,

  squeezing out the air. She felt as if her ribs were curling in on her chest, crushing her lungs. Her temples

  pulsed. "You need to leave. Now." "Ariana. What's wrong?"

  Even in the midst of her growing panic, she heard the concern in his usually playful voice and was touched.

  She braced a hand on top of a metal rack full of ski jackets and forced herself to breathe.

  In...two ... thre
e ... Out... two ... three.... "Are you okay?" He touched her back with his palm and she flinched

  away. Of course she wasn't okay. She was in the middle of a panic attack. Couldn't he see that? She had been

  careless, had let her guard down for just a second. Had done it where anyone could see. It was too dangerous.

  If word ever got back to Paige ...Ariana didn't want to think about what could happen. What Paige had the

  power to do. Things had almost gone too far. That could not happen again. Ever.

  "Just go," she said, her voice raspy. "Fine." And just like that, the concern was gone. His face shut down. And

  then he was gone as well. Ariana closed her eyes and continued to count through her breathing. In ...two

  ...three ...Out, two, three. Until the walls finally expanded again. Until the air whooshed back and her skin

  began to cool. When she opened her eyes again, the remaining salesgirl was eyeing her warily from the

  counter. "We're closing," the girl said with disdain. As if she were talking to some smelly street urchin who

  had come in solely to loiter and get warm. Move, Ariana told herself. Just move.She lifted her chin and

  somehow made it to the front of the store, where she paid for Daniel's hat. She no longer cared if it was

  perfect. She just needed to buy it and get the hell out of there. She needed to get back to Billings. Better yet,

  she needed to get away, period. As she exited into the night, she barely felt the icy wind whip her hair around

  her face.

  "What exactly were you doing in there?" Noelle hooked her arm through Ariana's and nodded toward the

  front of the North Face store. Ariana's blood ran cold. Why wasn't Noelle in Sweet Nothings? Why was she

  waiting for her on the street? Had she seen Thomas leave? But following Noelle's gaze, Ariana realized

  Noelle was pointing at Sergei, who was strolling across the street, a small North Face shopping bag swinging

  from his wrist. He must have walked out right before Ariana had. How had she not noticed him inside ?

  "Looks like your little Latvian admirer has upgraded to stalker." Noelle smirked. She gave Sergei a mocking

  little wave. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and upped his pace. "How cute," she said sardonically.

  "Noelle, that is not cute. I cannot have a stalker."

  Especially not if he saw me with Thomas. Ariana clenched her fists as Sergei glanced back at her with his

  cold, flat eyes. Had he been in the store the whole time? Had he witnessed her panic attack? And-even

  worse-had he seen what she and Thomas had almost done? Ariana's pulse started racing again. "Oh, please.

  He's totally harmless," Noelle said with a dismissive flick of the wrist. "So he has a little crush. Who the hell

  cares?" I do, Ariana thought as Noelle dragged her down the sidewalk. Because if Sergei had seen her with

  Thomas-had seen them almost kiss-then she cared very much.

  INVITE

  ***"What do you mean you can't leave for Vermont?" Daniel's eyes blazed.

  Morning light poured through the large windows on the far side of Easton's dining hall. As the room started

  to fill with students, the sounds of laughter, clinking silverware, and scraping chairs bubbled up around

  Ariana. She shifted in her wooden seat, glancing around to see if anyone was watching. Of course, they were.

  But luckily, most of the Billings Girls had yet to arrive. "It's just that I have to finish this paper," she said

  quietly.Or, more accurately, start this paper. Ariana had stayed up all night trying to put her thoughts on

  paper, but unfortunately the only thoughts in her mind were about sex. She kept trying to picture losing her

  virginity to Daniel, kept trying to map it out in her mind so she'd be prepared when it happened. All night

  long she had been imagining her and Daniel in the posh lodge bedroom with candles all around. She was

  wearing her favorite white silk nightgown; he was wearing a T-shirt and striped pajama pants. He started to

  kiss her. They slowly undressed. The whole thing was fine. Perfect even. But then, when she arrived at the

  pivotal moment in her daydream, Daniel always morphed into Thomas. Every time. And then she would

  break out in a sweat and have to start the whole thing over again.

  At this rate, she was never going to be prepared. And she was never going to write that paper, either.

  "How long have you known this was going to happen?" Daniel demanded. "Since last night," Ariana

  admitted. Daniel huffed an exaggerated sigh. "Then why didn't you call me?" Because I couldn't bear to let

  you down, Ariana thought. I couldn't admit that I'd failed. Failed you, failed us, failed ...failed ...failed...."I

  don't know," she said lamely. "Ari, the Hearsts are coming over for dinner tonight. I wanted you to be there.

  My parents are expecting you to be there." A vein along Daniel's temple pulsed. Ariana grabbed her forearm

  and squeezed. She hated when Daniel got like this. It made her feel so small. "I know, and I'm sorry. I just

  need this afternoon, and then I'll come up and join you. I just can't leave with you in an hour." "This freakin'

  sucks." "I know. But I got you a present to keep you warm until I get there," she said with false enthusiasm,

  handing him a silver-wrapped box with a red velvet ribbon. She had spent forty-five minutes getting the bow

  just right. Daniel just looked at it, still stewing. "Open it!" Ariana said brightly.

  He sighed again and tore the ribbon off, letting it fall to the floor. Ariana watched it flutter to the floor, her

  jaw clenched in irritation. It was just a bow, she told herself. You can't expect a guy to notice a bow.... Daniel

  pulled the hat out and stared at it, saying nothing. The seconds felt like hours. She wished he would accept her

  apology and move on. The dining hall was filling up quickly now, and the Billings Girls were almost through

  the line. She didn't want to have this conversation in front of everyone. Especially not Paige. "Daniel?"

  Ariana prompted. "It's great. Thanks," he said moodily. He tossed the box on the table just as their friends

  started to arrive.

  "Uh-oh. Someone's pissed," Noelle teased Daniel. She placed her tray of cereal and fruit down and sank into

  her usual spot next to Ariana. Paige, Dash, and Isobel filled the other seats. "Did Ari tell you about her hot

  rendezvous last night?" It was as if all the air had been drained from the cafeteria. As everyone turned to look

  at her, Ariana clutched her coffee mug so tightly her knuckles turned white. Noelle couldn't be talking about

  Thomas, right? Had she seen them after all?

  "Don't bother playing coy," Paige said, sitting down at the head of the table and biting into a green apple. Her

  face looked pinched. Angry. "It's insulting." "Yeah." Isobel smiled. "Noelle already told us all about your

  Latvian lovah" she said, licking a dollop of yogurt from the back of her spoon. "Your Latvian lover?" Daniel

  looked baffled. "You know, Sergei," Noelle sang, brushing her dark hair over her shoulder. The entire table

  dissolved into laughter, and Ariana felt all the tension flow out of her body. She forced a laugh and counted

  the number of buttons on Noelle's Marc Jacobs blouse-twelve-until her heart settled in her chest.

  "That freak? What'd he do now?" Daniel snapped. "Nothing," Ariana replied. "We just happened to be in the

  same store at the same time." The explanation seemed to satisfy Daniel. He picked a grape out of Ariana's

  fruit cup and slumped back in his chair, brooding as he chewed. Clearly he was still annoyed about Ariana's

  announcement, but at l
east he knew nothing about Thomas. "So what time are you leaving, Noelle?" Isobel

  asked. Ariana buttered her toast and let the conversation wash over her. She noticed Thomas sitting a few

  tables over, shaking his head at Gage, who was doubled over in laughter. A few tables down from them was

  Sergei sitting alone, wearing his trademark argyle sweater and glasses, hunched over a book. Ariana didn't

  know why the sight of him make her heart ping in her chest. She shouldn't feel sorry for him. He was creepy

  and possibly stalking her. But she couldn't help but feel like she understood him a little. Because even though

  she had friends, had Billings, she could relate to his loneliness. No one really knew her, either.

  Daniel touched her arm. Swallowing the gigantic lump that was now hovering in her throat, Ariana tuned

  back into the conversation. When she looked into his eyes, she could see that he'd decided to forgive her. She

  felt her shoulders relax.

  "Is there anything I can do?" he offered, smoothing his green khakis over his knees. "Make it easier for you to

  get out of here on time?" "Like what?" Ariana asked as Paige speared a piece of grapefruit with a butter knife.

  An acidic drop landed on Ariana's cheek. Paige smirked a halfhearted apology and went back to her

  grapefruit. "Write a few pages while you pack?" Daniel offered. "You haven't even read the book!" Ariana

  laughed. "Doesn't matter," Dash said over a mouthful of bagel. "Dude can pull any assignment out of his ass.

  He wrote Gage's Western civ term paper in an hour and a half last year and he got an A- minus." Ariana

  glanced quizzically at Daniel, and he shrugged. "Lost a bet," he explained.

  "Thanks," Ariana smiled, happy that, for the moment, things seemed back to normal. "But I have to finish this

  on my own. If you want to help, you can take my bags up to Vermont so I don't have to deal with them on the

  train." "You got it. Anything else?" "You can try on your present," she said playfully. She grabbed the fleece

  hat off the table and tugged it over his head. Daniel pulled that hat down over his eyes, then pushed it up

  again so that it was just above his brow. He smiled adorably at Ariana. "What do you think?" he asked.

  "Very sexy," she replied with a laugh.

  Noelle rolled her eyes and took a sip of her coffee. Daniel tugged the hat off and stuffed it in his backpack. "I

  love it. Thanks. Really." "You're-" The sound of Ariana's cell vibrating on the table cut her off. It buzzed

  loudly, vibrating slowly across the table. Isobel and Paige watched as Ariana reached out and picked it up.

  The blue screen flashed the words 1 new txt msg. She flipped the phone open, curious. Everyone who would

  text her was sitting right here.

  Old chapel, 7 p.m. Don't be late, naughty girl.Her heart stopped and she glanced up. Thomas was still sitting

  with Gage just a few tables away. But this time, he was looking directly at her. She blushed and immediately

  snapped the phone shut. "Who's that?" Daniel was looking at her curiously. She forced herself to look back.

  "Hmmm?" she asked, still gripping the phone in her hand. "On the phone," Daniel said impatiently. He

  reached for her cell, but Ariana stuffed it into her Kate Spade bag, hoping Daniel couldn't see her clenched

  jaw, the nervous energy that was now racing through her. "Nobody," she said quickly. "What's the matter

  with you?" Daniel demanded, his shoulders rigid and angry. "Why won't you let me see it?"

  "Why won't you let me have any privacy?" Ariana shot back. Her face burned. Isobel, Dash, Noelle, and