“I won’t stay long. Just come to check on you.” I looked at each of them
“Thank you…this…is my family.” His eyes twinkled as he said that. “My wife, my son, and my grandson. Guys, this is Dr. Parker.” His voice trailed off toward the end.
“It’s nice to meet all of you.”
His wife looked to me and gave me a wide smile. “He’s mentioned you a lot,” she stated.
“That’s nice.”
“Hey, don’t you want to know what I said? Suppose I told my family you were horrid to me and treated me like a toad?” Coach cut in.
Still joking around, even when it was clear he was in a bad way.
I chuckled. “Well I hope it was all good things.”
“It was,” his wife said. “Really good things. Thank you for taking such great care of him for us. We’re grateful.”
“You’re very welcome. It’s been a real pleasure.” I smiled and acknowledged them all again as they beamed back at me.
“Hey,” Coach breathed. “Did you…tell him? Captain Pompous? Did you tell him that important thing you were supposed to tell him?”
I looked at him, noticed how his gaze clung to mine and how he seemed to brighten a little at the prospect.
The thing he was talking about was telling Devon that I loved him.
That important thing.
That oh so important thing I should have done a long time ago.
“No,” I answered and gave him a phony as hell smile. “Not had a chance to yet. I’ve been rushed off my feet busy.”
“Bullshi…” He grimaced when he looked at his grandson. “I mean bull droppings,” he corrected and winced.
I laughed and his wife shook her head at him.
“Nice save,” I complimented.
“I try for the little guy.” He quirked a brow at his grandson. “Anyhow, no point telling others the important thing you should tell him.” He lifted his head slightly off the pillow and gazed at me. “It’s important Kelly. Just do it. It will save you so much time.” He looked around at his family and smiled with appreciation.
“I’ll bear that in mind,” I promised. “Nice meeting you all. Let me know if any of you need anything.”
With a curt nod I left them.
I suspected I might not see much of the coach again after this week. It would get busy again for me with the new patient we were getting Monday.
It was fine though, I would keep tabs on him.
It was nice of him to keep tabs on me.
I just wished that his advice was as easy to follow as it was given.
I couldn’t believe so many years had passed and I’d found myself in the same boat.
Would I make the same mistake?
That really was left to me to decide.
Tell Devon I loved him. It shouldn’t be so hard since I felt it in abundance.
I’d see what happened tonight and test the water from there.
When I saw him tonight I’d see how I felt and maybe the right thing to do was tell him about my encounter with Melanie. Talk to him about it and stop hiding.
It sounded like a plan.
I just hoped I could follow through with it.
Chapter 20
Devon
Things were as weird as I thought they could get.
Whenever something was wrong with Kelly she’d go quiet and it was what she didn’t say and what she did that spoke louder than her words.
I got to her place last night.
I planned to talk and ask her what was up with her. Except the minute I tried to ask her she kissed me and we ended up naked on her sofa, then in her shower, then her bed.
Emotion overload—and while I’d be the last person to complain about wild sex, I knew it extended beyond that.
It went further than the wildness. A lot further.
What was worse was this morning when I woke up in her bed and she was gone. She’d gotten ready and went to work, leaving me there.
If that wasn’t weird I didn’t know what the hell was. It was crazy weird and I’d decided that I’d had enough and wasn’t going to venture into the weekend with whatever it was that was going on with her.
I wanted to talk it out and not pussyfoot around shit.
I found her in the labs again and I knew for certain she wasn’t needed there. The work that they asked her to help out with finished from last night.
She was surprised to see me because I, like her, wasn’t scheduled to be at work for another hour.
I didn’t even bother to say good morning or start off with the usual pleasantries. I just took her hand without any kind of warning and led her into one of the meeting rooms.
The lights came on as we entered, shining down on us and showing her blotchy skin and red eyes. She looked like she’d been crying.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. Straight to the point and I made sure I said it in a “don’t give me any ridiculous answers” kind of way.
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“Kelly, tell me what’s wrong. What is going on with you? It’s fine if you’re upset or something has riled you up the wrong way, but you have to tell me. I can’t just be kept in the dark. Not knowing and seeing that something is going on with you. Tell me what it is.”
She gazed at me, her face blank, that damn worry and wariness in her eyes. “I’m just working some stuff out.”
“Stuff to do with me? Is it me? Is it us?”
“Devon, please just…I just have to think about some stuff then we’ll talk.”
I glared at her, really, really trying not to push. I was trying so hard but it was difficult not to.
“Kelly, this isn’t fair. This feels like us from years ago. You shut me out at the point when we were so close. Please don’t do it again. Please don’t do that to me again.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to. How about I find you later?”
“Will you? Or will you just make up some stupid excuse as to why you can’t see me?” I shook my head.
I loved her, but the woman could be so damn stubborn sometimes.
I didn’t wait for an answer. Instead, I stormed off and left her.
She could figure out what she wanted.
As for me, I could pretend to be so busy I had no time for her either. I could avoid her too and distract myself from the fact that I’d left her from so early in the morning and a whole day had passed and I hadn’t heard from her.
It was the whole day. At the end I was cursing myself for loving her so damn much and I really wasn’t in the mood to see Todd hanging around my car in the parking lot.
It was just after six and there he was, clearly waiting for me. He was even resting on the hood of the car.
“What do you want man?” I asked. My tone reeked of me having had enough of everyone and everything.
He moved away from the car and stood straighter. “I’ve come to see you.”
“Why? Why do you keep trying so damn hard to see me when I don’t want to see you?” I snapped. It actually grieved me to talk to him like that. He was my brother.
As much as I knew he was favored by our parents I never let it get to me so much that it stopped me from having a relationship with him. Todd had done so much for himself that I accepted he was this great person to be admired.
I’d admired him instead of being some jealous prick. I admired what he could do and all he’d achieved. I’d admired that he’d always been there for me, and I trusted him wholeheartedly the way a brother should.
There was, however, nothing admirable about him now standing before me.
All that I used to feel was gone and I couldn’t get it back. I didn’t even want to try. The pushing and coming to see me wasn’t helping. If anything it just annoyed the hell out of me.
“I’m your brother and I’m not going away,” he said with a firm determination. “I’m just trying, whether you want to see me or not. It counts. I have to believe th
at it counts that I try, even if it means nothing.”
God…this was so hard.
I stared at him and he looked back with expectancy. Since this whole ordeal I’d never known what the hell to say to him. I didn’t know what I should say.
“Todd…I need time. I need time and I can’t say how long that might be. You trying says a lot, but I can’t help but feel that you want me to forgive you so that you can feel better. It doesn’t work that way.”
He shook his head. “It’s not that. It’s not that at all. I’m not doing this to feel better about myself. The whole thing is my fault and that’s why I’m trying to be there for you. I am the cause of this. I am the problem. I know that, but it’s me who used to be there for you when you had shit to deal with. So no, it’s not that I want to feel better. This is about you. Even if you were to forgive me right now, it wouldn’t make me feel better. This isn’t about that. What it’s about is you knowing I’m sorry. That’s the part that matters to me. You knowing that and truly believing I’m sorry. My stupid actions lost me my brother. There’s no redemption for that.”
I hung my head down and processed his words. When I met his gaze again I nodded.
“Todd…I can see you’re sorry, but that doesn’t make the pain go away from what you did.”
He sighed. “I know. But…like I said. I won’t stop trying. I thought you should know that.”
I wasn’t surprised by his stubbornness, and maybe that was something. Some ounce of a light at the end of the tunnel I’d been crawling through.
“I know,” I told him and something like hope sparked in his eyes.
“You know where I am if you need me, and just for the record, I’m no longer associating myself with Melanie. You’re right, it was inappropriate, no matter my reasoning. Just like everything else I’ve done.” He bowed his head briefly and left.
As I watched him go it was perhaps the first time since this whole blow up that I felt some inkling of the possibility of forgiveness.
My phone buzzed in my back pocket and I took it out quickly, believing it was Kelly.
I scowled so deep my face hurt when I saw a message from Melanie.
Damn it. Why did those two seem to crop up in sequence of each other? Like it was planned. First Todd, then her.
I opened the message and frowned all the more when I read it.
I’m at your place. Need to talk to you. Melanie.
That was the message.
Fuck!
What the fuck was she doing at my place again?
I jumped in my car and drove home. I expected her to be outside waiting on the balcony and couldn’t have been more livid when I saw that my door was ajar.
As far as I knew no one but me and the building’s super had the keys for the place.
The only person I would have allowed keys to the apartment was Kelly. I hadn’t bothered to get a set cut for her because I planned to move soon. Move into somewhere less dinky.
I pushed the door open and heard the faint sound of music. Jazz music. The kind Melanie and I used to play when we first met.
My grandfather was the guy responsible for getting me into jazz and that was something I never shared with Kelly because she hated it. The music was probably the first real thing that connected me with Melanie.
I went past the kitchen looking for her and there was no sign. As I was already in the living room and saw no sign of her, the only places left to look in my dinky apartment were the bathroom and the bedroom.
I got to the bedroom and found her.
Melanie was in my bed with a sheet wrapped around her. From the look of the sheet pressed up on her body it didn’t look like she had any clothes on.
She was fucking naked.
Naked with a smile on her face.
“What are you doing here?” I asked glaring at her. “How the fuck did you get inside?”
She smiled, giving me a very seductive saucy stare. “I have my ways. Devon, I’ve decided that it’s time to show you just how much I want you back. I’ve given you time to get what happened out of your system.”
I looked at her and wondered if she really thought she was making sense.
What did she mean she’d given me time?
I was under the impression that the only person who got to decide that was me.
“I’m not going into this again. This is shit Melanie. Fucking hell, do you know how insane this is? You can’t just come in here and try to seduce me.”
“I’m trying. Devon, I’m trying to get you back.”
“You can’t get me back. A lot has changed since we broke up. I’m back with Kelly.” I gazed at her long and hard hoping she got the message.
“Oh, her? I had a little chat with her. I wouldn’t worry too much about her.”
My blood ran cold, draining from me.
“What did you just say to me?”
“I said I spoke to her and laid down some hard truths she needed to hear.”
This was it.
This was why Kelly was acting so weird. It was her. Melanie.
“Jesus, Melanie. Something is wrong with you! What the hell gave you the right to do that?”
Great, just great. Who knew what she said to Kelly?
She was the reason why Kelly had been acting so weird all week. And all week I’d wondered what was up with Kelly. Now I knew why she was avoiding me. Why she was so distant.
To my horror Melanie slid off the bed and gave me the answer to the question of whether or not she was naked.
She absolutely was.
The sheets slipped from her and she walked over to me in a slow and purposefully seductive stride.
She came right up to me and stopped with that smile on her face again.
“Devon, please try to remember it’s me you love. We were supposed to get married. You know how sorry I am for what I did, and I don’t think I can be blamed for wanting to fix us.”
Without moving too close I got near enough, just so she could see how serious I was.
“Melanie, get your clothes on and leave. We’re done. We are over,” I told her and the spark in her eyes dimmed.
She shook her head at me. “No, we can’t be. We can’t be done. Remember when you first danced with me under the stars? That was when you first kissed me.” She pressed her hand on my chest and stepped closer to me, closing the space between us. “Remember when you first made love to me?”
A loud smash tore my attention away from her.
I snapped my gaze to the direction it came from and saw Kelly standing by the door. The smash was a bottle of wine. The shattered glass on the floor looked as displaced as the crushed expression on her face.
“Kelly!” I gasped.
She looked from me to Melanie. Melanie was actually smiling.
I couldn’t believe this!
Kelly shook her head and ran back the way she’d come.
“Let her go,” Melanie cried in a menacing tone.
I turned back to her and glared. “Get out of my house Melanie. Don’t come back. Don’t look for me again. Just leave me alone. Just go!”
It was only then she saw I meant it, but I didn’t have time to deal with her.
I ran as fast as I could after Kelly.
I caught up with her in the parking lot. I had to grab her and pull her back to stop her from running away. She was crying so much.
“It’s not what you think,” I cried, holding on to her for dear life. “It’s not what you think Kelly.” The desperation in my own voice shocked me. I didn’t know I could sound so needy. I didn’t realize how badly I never wanted to lose her again.
“Let go of me.” She wriggled out of my arms.
I realized I had to release my grip on her because if I held her any tighter I’d hurt her. As I let go of her she whirled around to face me.
“Kelly, please. It’s not what you think. I didn’t do anything and I wasn’t going to. You have to be
lieve me.”
“How the hell do you explain her in there with no clothes on!” she shot back.
“She was inside my apartment. I got here and saw her like that. You have to believe me,” I pleaded.
She shook her head at me. “It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. It’s only a matter of time before you go back to her.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Because you asked her to marry you!”
“Yes, I did. And yes, I loved her at one point. But I never stopped loving you. I never stopped. I love you. I have always loved you and I always will.”
She stilled and looked at me. There was a point, a split second, when I felt that she believed me, but then that wariness came back in her eyes.
“I’m sorry, I have to go.”
My shoulders slumped like a fifty ton weight had been placed on them. I literally felt crushed.
She turned and left me and all I could do was watch her go.
There was no more I could say that I hadn’t already. It was déjà vu, but the worst version of what happened last time.
This time she left me.
Chapter 21
Kelly
The worst thing about last night was that a part of me saw the truth in what Devon was saying, and I believed him.
That part of me screamed loud and clear in my ears, in my soul, telling me he hadn’t done anything with Melanie.
That part of me believed him.
It was so much more believable with that satisfying smirk that lit up her face. The evil bitch smirk that said look, I have your man.
Part of me believed him.
So, what sent me away?
It was seeing them together and not knowing for sure. Her naked practically against him. Her naked like that and saying those words. Trying to remind him of them making love.
I saw them together and the other part of me that had taken the coward’s way out over the last few days wanted to stay away.
Hide under a rock and stay there forever. Protect my heart.
I didn’t realize just how much I loved him until last night when it seemed that I’d lost him again.
I’d gone to see Devon because I felt I needed to. I was actually going to tell him that she’d spoken to me and that I just needed to wrap my head around what she said. That was all. I’d just wanted him to know what was up with me and that it wasn’t him. I’d brought the wine as a peace offering for my foolishness over the week.
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