A Doctor's Dilemma

by Laura Scott

  “Thank you.” She held his hand tight for a long moment before releasing it.

  “You’re welcome.” He smiled at her, then nodded at Ethan before heading out of the room.

  “He’s out of surgery.” Kate sat down, feeling dazed. “He’s going to be fine.”

  “Yes, he is.” Ethan glanced around the now empty waiting room. “Should we go down to the cafeteria for something to eat?”

  “No.” Kate wasn’t leaving until she’d seen Granddad with her own eyes. “I’m not really hungry.”

  Waiting to hear from the ICU took longer than she expected. Almost an hour passed before a nurse phoned through to the waiting room, asking for her.

  “Dr. Elliott wanted to wean him off the vent, we just took out his breathing tube,” the nurse explained in a rush. “I’m sorry about the long wait.”

  “That’s all right. You’ve really weaned him off the ventilator that quickly?” Kate could hardly believe it.

  “We did. Come in and see for yourself.”

  Kate hung up the phone and turned to Ethan. “They’ve already extubated him. Will you come up with me to see him?”

  “Of course.” He slid his arm around her waist as they headed for the elevator.

  The lights in CICU were low, but the staff nurses were still busy even after midnight. The unit clerk behind the desk directed her to Granddad’s room.

  “He’s awake, but very groggy,” the nurse warned. “I’ve just given him a couple milligrams of morphine for pain.”

  Kate nodded, approaching his bedside with a wide smile on her face. She would be cheerful if it killed her. “Granddad?” She reached for his hand. “I’m so glad to see you.”

  Her grandfather opened his eyes and tried to speak. She couldn’t understand what he was saying.

  “It’s okay, don’t try to talk. Just rest, Granddad. You’re going to be just fine.”

  He shook his head as if frustrated, then tried again. Rather than watching him struggle, she leaned close, straining to hear. “Miranda.”

  “Miranda?” Kate straightened, her gaze perplexed. “You want me to call Miranda?”

  Her granddad closed his eyes and nodded wearily.

  “All right, Granddad, I’ll call her,” she promised, knowing the woman’s number was likely in his phone.

  She was shocked that Miranda was the first person her grandfather had asked for. Clearly, his lady friend was important to him.

  It was nice they’d grown so close in such a short time.

  Still, Kate wasn’t proud of the flare of resentment that slithered through her belly.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Ethan glanced at Kate seated beside him in the Lifeline chopper, trying to figure out what was going on behind those chameleon eyes of hers. She could’ve been on the far side of the moon for all the emotional distance she put between them.

  Reese’s voice crackled through his headset. “Lifeline to base, we’re running into scattered patches of fog. Visibility is still about ninety percent, so we are still on course to reach Cedar Bluff Hospital in fifteen minutes.”

  “Ten-four.”

  They’d received the flight call first thing that morning, which meant he hadn’t had time to ask Kate how her grandfather was feeling. Three days had passed since he’d driven her home the night after her grandfather’s open heart procedure. He’d offered to keep her company that night, to sleep on the sofa, but she’d refused.

  And now, three days later, she still wouldn’t look him in the eye.

  Something was wrong, he wasn’t so stupid he couldn’t figure out at least that much. More was bothering Kate than just her grandfather’s emergency heart surgery. And logic dictated that her avoidance of him was related to his confessing he was falling in love with her.

  Guilt assailed him. Why had he blurted out the truth like that? Obviously, he’d frightened her. He wasn’t sure why, but there was no denying something had changed between them. From the moment he’d seen her bouncing on the Hippity Hop, spraying Silly String at his daughter, he’d fallen for her. Hard.

  Logically, he understood they hadn’t known each other long, barely a couple of weeks. Yet he was old enough to know what he wanted in a woman and in a relationship, and he couldn’t imagine his life without Kate.

  Unfortunately, it was clear she didn’t feel the same way.

  A cement ball of doubt settled in Ethan’s gut. Had he ruined things with Kate by rushing her? They’d only had the one date, but that didn’t stop him from telling her how he felt. Why couldn’t he have just followed his brain that had warned him to take things slow? Waited just a little longer?

  “ETA three minutes.”

  Ethan glanced at Kate. Her attention was intensely focused on the flight report on her clipboard, which only had a few of the lines filled in. Once they landed at Cedar Bluff Hospital to pick up their patient, every line would be completed. He’d already gotten a brief report from the physician on duty. Their patient was a young man, twenty-three years old, with severe pulmonary hypertension. Rick Roberts had been recently placed on the lung transplant list and as a result needed immediate transport to Trinity.

  Reese landed the chopper. He jumped out, Kate right behind him. Together they rounded the helicopter to remove the gurney from the back. He gestured for her to step away so he could pull the gurney out himself; there was no reason to stress her sore shoulder. But she ignored him, taking hold of the opposite end of the gurney and lifting it out with him.

  Stubborn woman. Ethan pushed the stretcher away from the helipad toward the hospital’s emergency room entrance. Inside, he took off his helmet, noticing Kate did the same.

  “How’s your shoulder?” He glanced at her as they made their way to the elevator and the ICU.

  “Fine. It’s better every day.”

  “You never did see the orthopod, did you?”

  “Not yet.” She shrugged “I did make an appointment, though, I believe it’s next week. Trust me, I’d like to get off this lifting restriction as much as you would like me to.”

  He ground his teeth in frustration. She’d misunderstood him again. He cared more about her shoulder and preventing further injury than he did about whether or not he had to take over most of the lifting. Before he could comment and clear the air, they’d reached the ICU.

  “Ginny, the Lifeline crew is here,” someone called when they entered.

  A cute, redheaded nurse hurried over. “Hi there. Rick Roberts is all ready to go.”

  Ethan smiled, though his attention was centered on Kate, whose somber attitude hadn’t improved during the ride in. It was so unlike her. Where was her laughter? Her jokes? He really missed her smile. “Great. Is there a physician here who can update me on Mr. Robert’s condition?”

  “No, I’m sorry he’s not available. I can tell you the patient has been stable.” Ginny gestured to the bedside. “Come on, I’ll introduce you.”

  The three of them entered the room.

  “Rick, this is Dr. Weber and flight nurse Kate Lawrence. They are here to transport you to Trinity Medical Center so you can get your lung transplant.”

  “Hi.” Rick’s voice was faint. Ethan figured the guy was lucky not to be on a ventilator, although the best treatment for pulmonary hypertension was to keep the patient off the breathing machine for as long as possible. Once placed on a ventilator, a patient’s lung disease tended to deteriorate rapidly. “Wow. Guess I’m traveling in style.”

  “Yep, you sure are.” Kate grinned. Ethan was amazed at the transformation, and his chest ached because she hadn’t smiled like that for him. At least not since their one and only date. “Lifeline limousine at your service.” She gave Rick a mock bow and patted the empty gurney. ”Your chariot awaits.”

  “I feel like a fraud,” Rick said as they helped him move over from the bed to the gurney. The young man was very weak, so Ethan made sure to do most of the heavy lifting. “Shouldn’t you be using the helicopter for people who really need it?”
<
br />   “Hey, why should the trauma patients have all the fun?” Kate quickly switched over the cables to their portable equipment. “You know, once in a while it’s nice to transport a patient who can appreciate our luxurious accommodations.”

  Ethan strapped him on the gurney, and Rick gave a weak smile. “Luxurious. Yeah. Right.”

  “Besides, you are on some pretty high doses of medication that require close monitoring,” Ethan added. He knew looks could be deceptive. Rick seemed to be doing very well, but actually, he was breathing heavily from the small act of transferring onto the gurney. Ethan took note of how the patient’s heart rate had also increased dramatically while the oxygen level in his blood had dropped by several points.

  Rick hadn’t been intubated and placed on a ventilator yet, but in all honesty, Ethan suspected if he didn’t get a lung transplant soon, the young man would die.

  The realization was sobering.

  “Ready to roll?” Kate patted Rick’s arm. “You’re the boss on this flight. Customer service is our specialty. We aim to please.”

  Ethan couldn’t help but smile as Kate continued her lighthearted routine. She kept calling Rick sir as if they were really boarding some exclusive chartered flight.

  They wheeled Rick out to the waiting helicopter. Reese came out to quickly assist with lifting the patient through the hatch, then once they were all settled inside, prepared for the return flight.

  Kate placed the headphones over Rick’s ears so she could continue to chat with him. “Hmmm. We seem to be all out of coffee, tea, and soda. How about a little normal saline instead?” She grinned as she connected a new IV bag to his nearly empty line.

  Ethan lost his balance as Reese banked the chopper, and he shook his head, feeling as if he’d entered a time warp. Kate’s sunny face suddenly reminded him of the very first time they’d met, when he’d been so preoccupied with Carly and his childcare problems. He’d assumed she’d been coming on to him. But now he knew that was mostly because deep down he’d been fighting a strong attraction to her.

  But what about the men in her life before him? She claimed she had a few male friends, but now he thought that might not be the case at all. The more he thought about it, the harder it was for him to believe it. Kate was beautiful, inside and out, with a great, if quirky, sense of humor. Her strong family loyalty was also endearing. It was possible each of her relationships had started out the same way his had, with Kate’s lighthearted fun approach. Was it possible the other men she’d seen had wanted more but she’d shut them down?

  He was beginning to think this on the surface type of relationship had been her specialty, until she crossed the line with him. They’d hugged and kissed and grown close. But now it was obvious she was backing off. Somehow, he didn’t think her sudden need for distance was because she didn’t like his kiss but simply because of his declaration of falling in love.

  Could it be that he’d given his heart to a woman who didn’t want a serious relationship? His hope sank as he considered the painful truth. Especially, perhaps, because a relationship with him came with a ready-made family.

  Kate was trying her best to focus on Rick, but Ethan’s magnetic presence overwhelmed the cramped interior of the helicopter to the exclusion of everything else.

  She couldn’t even explain why she’d been trying to avoid him. At first, fear and worry over Granddad had kept her from thinking about how Ethan had professed his love. But last night she hadn’t been able to sleep, replaying that moment over and over in her mind.

  How was it possible that his kisses had changed her? Each and every one of her nerve endings seemed to be in tune with him, distracting her with the urge to touch him.

  This obsession of hers had to stop. Ethan had a daughter, and even if he did think he was in love with her, she knew he probably only said the words out of wanting a mother for his daughter not true love. Whatever feelings he had for her would soon fade, and he’d move on to someone else. They always did. She had no reason to think Ethan would be any different.

  “Kate? I don’t feel so good.” Rick’s quiet voice was barely above a whisper.

  Her gaze instantly sought the heart monitor, verifying that his vital signs were stable. “What’s wrong, Rick? You feel sick to your stomach? Or light-headed and dizzy?”

  “Let’s verify his medication infusion,” Ethan suggested, pulling out his phone calculator app. “Let’s make sure we didn’t miscalculate the infusion rate.”

  “Sick to my stomach,” Rick confided. He managed a weak smile. “Maybe I’m airsick.”

  “Well, that’s impossible because we don’t allow air sickness to bother our patients while they are enjoying Lifeline’s limousine service,” she teased. “There must be something else going on here.”

  “His IVs are all running at the correct rates,” Ethan informed her. “Give him five milligrams of Compazine.”

  “All right.” Taking medication out of the bag, she dropped the dose and injected it into Rick’s normal saline IV line. “This medication is for nausea,” she told him. “Hopefully, you’ll feel better soon.”

  “Thanks.” Rick closed his eyes, his face pale and drawn. Her heart squeezed painfully in her chest. He was only twenty-three years old and facing possible death if he didn’t get a lung transplant. And even then, how long would he have to live? Another ten to fifteen years? Antirejection meds made every transplant patient more susceptible to illnesses, so anything longer than that was highly unlikely.

  The thought made her sad.

  “Reese, how long until we reach Trinity?” Ethan asked.

  “ETA eighteen minutes,” Reese responded.

  Kate trusted Ethan, but she also glanced at the medication bags, making sure everything was running correctly. Some of this medication was powerful stuff. One minor miscalculation could have harsh consequences. She traced the IV tubing back to the catheter, twisting the connecting ports to make sure they weren’t loose.

  “Ethan, take a look at this.” Kate tugged Rick’s hospital gown out of the way to show him the central line site. “I think it’s leaking at the site.”

  Ethan’s solemn gaze met hers. “You’re right—good catch. I’ll try to start another line on the other side.”

  They worked together. Kate handed Ethan supplies before he asked for them, trying to reassure Rick as Ethan slid another catheter into a vein in the side of his neck. Ethan was good, he hit the vein on the first try, and Kate transferred the medication infusion from the leaky catheter to the new one.

  She took her time flushing the old line, not wanting to bolus Rick with whatever medication was left over in the catheter.

  Reese landed at Trinity Medical Center’s heliport a short while later. She stayed with Rick as Ethan went out to withdraw him out from the back, then jumped down after him.

  Once inside the ICU, Rick was feeling better, and they were able to transfer his care without difficulty. Rick clutched her hand tight when she bent over him to say goodbye.

  “Take care of yourself, Rick. I’ll come back and visit after you get your transplant,” she promised.

  “Good. I’d like that.” His voice was weak, but his smile was all heart.

  On the way out to the chopper, Ethan glanced at her. “I didn’t get a chance to ask this morning, but how is your grandfather doing?”

  “Oh, he’s doing great. He was transferred out of the ICU yesterday. I’m heading over to visit him after work tonight.” Kate didn’t add how her granddad didn’t seem to need her much now that Miranda was with him. Her disgruntled feelings were petty, but she couldn’t seem to get a grip. Granddad was obviously happy. And honestly, she’d secretly investigated Miranda only to find the woman was as nice as she seemed to be, not the gold-digger she’d originally thought. Kate knew she should be doing cartwheels to see her granddad doing so well.

  So why wasn’t she?

  “I can go with you, if you’d like,” Ethan offered.

  “Oh, thanks, but I’m fine. I k
now you have to get home for Carly.” Kate ducked her head and jabbed the elevator button. She was being an idiot, but she couldn’t seem to help herself. It would be better to break away from Ethan now rather than wait until later.

  But she hadn’t anticipated just how much she would miss him. A part of her wanted to pull him close, the other part of her wanted to run as fast and as far as she could.

  “Kate, Carly is doing much better. She hasn’t tormented the nanny in almost three days.” He paused and cleared his throat. “I’d like to come with you.”

  Panicked, she glanced at him. Why was he doing this? Didn’t he know how difficult it was for her to be with him? But what could she say? No? “I guess that’s fine.”

  He frowned at her less than enthusiastic response, and she stared at the elevator floor, praying they reached the rooftop helipad quickly. The silence hung thick and heavy like wet snow between them.

  Once on board the chopper, they didn’t have time to talk because another call came in—this time a scene call from a multiple motor vehicle crash.

  It was a bad one. Black smoke billowed out of a pile of burning cars. Although they landed nearby and hauled out their gear, rushing over to offer aid, Kate was fairly certain there wouldn’t be many survivors

  The semitruck had crossed the center line and crashed head-on into several other cars in the oncoming lane of traffic. Kate and Ethan helped as much as they could at the scene, but each person they pulled from the record wreckage was beyond hope.

  By the time they’d finished, seven people were dead, including the truck driver.

  Not a single survivor.

  The ride back to Lifeline was especially quiet. Ethan’s flight suit, as well as hers, smelled of smoke and was stained with blood. Once they reached the hangar, they both changed into fresh flight suits and tossed theirs into the washing machine that was kept in the hangar just for this purpose.

  They spent so much time at the crash scene their shift was nearly over. Still deeply bothered by the needless loss of life, Kate busied herself with paperwork as a way to avoid another conversation with Ethan. By the time the oncoming shift arrived, she was more than ready to go.