Not Quite Beowulf

by Will Shand

  ‘Help!’ shouted Bjorn and the two guards ran over.

  ‘Ach!’ Steelstrom said to the guards, ‘I’m getting to old to be out. Could you help me up and on to my room?’

  Miraculously, it seemed to Bjorn, that the plan had worked. Suddenly full of confidence he stepped up to the door and knocked, quietly, but firmly.

  ‘Rosamunde! Rosamunde! It’s me, Bjorn!’

  The Queen opened the door and for a moment Bjorn’s banker’s heart was alive with joy. Then he saw that she was furious. She pulled him in and slammed the door.

  ‘You fool!’ she hissed, ‘Are you trying to get us killed!’

  He was too taken aback to reply at first, but then his breath returned.

  ‘Your note. You said to come! Rosamunde!’

  ‘Don’t call me that!’ she snapped, her face a white mask of anger. ‘I am the Queen. I am called Majesty, Grace or Highness!’

  Bjorn’s face fell.

  ‘I don’t understand?’

  The Queen seemed to take pity, or at least her level of anger reduced slightly.

  ‘If people hear you call me that, what will they think? It is only a King who can call a Queen by her true name!’

  Bjorn understood that,

  ‘Then I will be your King!’

  He took her in his arms, as he had long desired. He felt her respond. She was soft and warm and in his arms. He found her lips and the kissed. Bjorn was delighted. He had known this day would come. He tried to pull her towards the bed, but again she shocked him by pushing him firmly away.

  ‘Do you think I summoned you here for that?’

  She glared at him furiously. ‘Do you understand nothing?’

  This was an accurate appraisal of Bjorn’s understanding of the situation although he was unwilling to admit to this. He looked blankly at Rosamunde. The Queen? He had no idea what she wanted from him.

  Suddenly the Queen grasped this fact. She almost laughed.

  ‘Bjorn,’ she said, much more softly, ‘I am so sorry! But the danger I am in. What if the King should know, what if he found out? What would we do?’

  Again, Bjorn had no answer. She continued,

  ‘He would kill you. And without you, I too, would die.’ She paused and now almost sobbed,

  ‘We have only one chance. Tonight, after Beowulf slays the troll, there will be a great feast. The King will drink a great deal and when he and I return here you will kill him, you can hide in my wardrobe. I have arranged for a servant to tell the King that you are sick and will not attend the feast. You can hide there now. You have brought a weapon?’

  He showed her the dagger in a state of incredulity and disbelief. He had assumed that Beowulf would kill the King. After all, he was the warrior, but now he saw; if he, Bjorn was to be King, he would need to act in a kingly way. It was his kingly duty to kill Lars in order to take his throne and win his wife.

  ‘I’ll do it!’ he said.

  ‘I knew you would not fail me,’ the Queen replied.

  Nothing was still happening at the lake.

  Grendel’s Mother was watching from her vantage point. She had been amazed when the little naked man had come out and spoken to the crowd and further astonished when he had dived into the lake! For a short time she had been very worried, but when the minutes passed she had begun to feel relieved. Clearly the fool had drowned! He would not have found the cave; and if he had found the cave he would have been no match for Grendel. The man was not even armed!

  But still she felt uneasy. Experience told her that humans could not be trusted. She settled down to watch and while she watched her thoughts returned to the problem of what to do about the humans in the Beer Hall and their desecration of the lake area. What she wanted to do was get inside their Hall at night and kill as many as she could; especially the King. He was clearly the source of the problem, but she could not think how she could get in. They had gates and locks, as well as guards. The guards she was less afraid of, but she had no knowledge of how their mechanisms worked. There was no straightforward answer. She continued to watch and think.

  Also watching and thinking was Klug. He was very puzzled by Beowulf’s actions. It seemed, to Klug, that Beowulf had taken an enormous risk; the troll was twice his size. It could easily kill him. Klug deduced that Beowulf must have some kind of trick that he would use. Klug had listened carefully to what the small man had said. He had given very precise instructions, appearing entirely confident that his plan would succeed. He could not understand how Beowulf would persuade the troll to come to the surface and sit on a chair and talk to him, yet everything else he said or did seemed to work in his favour. Klug was envious of anyone whose life showed some sense and order. He decided to watch and wait with the rest.

  After almost twenty minutes had passed, the King beckoned to Thwurp, who lumbered over and bowed.

  ‘Majesty?’

  ‘What do you think is happening, Thwurp? He cannot still be alive. No man can hold his breath for this long.’

  Thwurp knew this, but had no solution.

  ‘There is no body,’ he pointed out, ‘but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t drowned.’

  ‘You were in the beast’s cave, weren’t you Thwurp? Before you escaped; did you think it was under the water?’

  Thwurp thought back. He remembered when it had appeared that Grendel had let him go and suddenly, much to his embarrassment, he understood.

  ‘I think it was; but I didn’t know. I think it bought me there while I was unconscious and I escaped by another way.’

  Thwurp thought about it.

  ‘He’s probably in the cave.’

  They both thought about it.

  ‘Rather him than me,’ said Lars honestly.

  ‘I’m with you on that, sir,’ Thwurp agreed.

  ‘What do you think we should do?’ Lars asked.

  ‘Wait and see?’

  Some of the soldiers and villagers were getting impatient. They had enjoyed the morning’s hunt and the meal at the lakeside. They had been amused by the naked man and his plan seemed almost unbelievable and this combined with his courage in going to a Troll’s cave on his own, with no weapons, had created a mood of awe that had lasted for quite a while, but as the afternoon dragged on the suspense gave way to doubt and frustration. Occasionally there were angry murmurings from the crowd about what was happening and why it was taking so long. Roscow was unhappy with this and stepped onto the platform to address the crowd, who immediately fell silent. None of them wanted to face an angry Roscow.

  ‘People!’ he boomed, ‘Ve must vait as Beovulf has commandment! He is the vileyest man alive and he vill bring zhe Troll out as he has told you. You must be quiet and have patience. Have none of you ever been a fishermen? Fishermen vaits by the vater for a long time quietly to catch a fish. Zhat is vot ve are here to do. Does anyone disagree?’

  No one disagreed, for the obvious and basic reason, and the crowd sat down and tried to be restless more quietly. After what seemed like an eternity there was a shout from the people nearest the lake. They were coming out!

  Roscow was quick to hush the crowd; but everyone could see that Beowulf had surfaced and was swimming towards the shore. For a moment the crowd felt a sense of disappointment and let out something of a sigh, until a sharper eyed soldier pointed out into the lake. The troll was following behind! A pulse of excitement and exhilaration went through the crowd. He had done it! They did not know how, but it was clear that Beowulf had achieved the impossible. The troll was following him! Spontaneous applause began to break out, until it was curtailed by Roscow and the rest of Beowulf’s stony faced guards. Nevertheless, the crowd hummed with anticipation as the small man climbed onto the bank and walked to the platform. The crowd gasped as the troll followed, Beowulf having beckoned to it. Somewhere near the back a voice said in admiration,

  ‘The man must be a sorcerer!’

  Beowulf stood, ready to speak, the troll near his side. The crowd were entirely silent, waiting to hear
what he would say.

  ‘Good King Lars, people and soldiers of the Kingdom of Lars, this is the troll, Grendel. He is here under my protection and he must not be harmed!’

  This brought a low growl of disapproval from the crowd. Beowulf immediately continued.

  ‘I repeat; this troll must not be harmed; he has come freely to negotiate with me and in plain view of you all. I shall now ask him to sit.’

  Beowulf gestured to one of the chairs and they both sat down.

  Grendel’s mother was shocked to see her son accompanying the man and surrounded by all his enemies. She realised that she was much too far away to call, but as soon as Grendel sat, she turned and began to climb down the slope. To reach the lake she had to go around the back of the hill, as the side facing the lake was too steep. When she could not see Grendel, she began to run. As she ran and scrambled she was desperately worried. She had no plan for what she would do when she reached the gathering; she just felt an overwhelming need to be there.

  ‘Troll Grendel,’ Beowulf began, ‘we have spoken at length about the conflict between you and the Kingdom of Lars and how this may be resolved. My proposal is that we discuss this again in front of King Lars and these witnesses, so it is clear that justice and honour prevail and a fair and lawful settlement to this dispute is found, do you consent?’

  Before Grendel could reply he was interrupted by an angry human voice from the crowd.

  ‘Monster! That is a monster and cannot be reasoned with. It is a beast and should be destroyed!’

  The speaker was one of the larger members of King Lars’ army; he pushed his way to stand at the side of the platform. Beowulf stood up and went over to the man.

  ‘That is an interesting contention,’ Beowulf observed, ‘what is your test for rationality? What is the difference between a monster and a man? How do you judge?’

  The soldier answered without thinking.

  ‘It kills; it eats the flesh of men!’

  Beowulf left a pause for the crowd to murmur its assent; that was their view.

  ‘And we are different in what way?’ he inquired, ‘We kill, we eat the flesh of other species. Men kill men, for greed, jealousy and anger; or sometimes justly in defence of what is ours. How is the troll different?’

  ‘He is a beast. He has no reason. He is a vile, evil monster!’

  ‘Let us see.’ said Beowulf, deliberately lowering his voice so that the crowd would need to quieten in order to hear him. ‘Let us see. Please be so good as to sit down again,’ he said to the soldier. He then turned to the crowd.

  ‘I will show you something else!’ he turned and went back to his seat. When he had sat, he turned to Grendel and said,

  ‘I was asking whether you consented to be part of these negotiations, regarding your dispute with the Kingdom of Lars. Do you consent?’

  Grendel replied solemnly, his strength had been going into controlling his body and emotions in this terrifying situation. Everywhere he looked he could see his enemies; they were angry and full of hate. He doubted Beowulf could persuade the mob, but there were no other options left open to him from where he was.

  ‘I do consent to play my part

  In these negotiations, and

  I swear that I will speak truthfully

  At all times, even to my own

  Detriment. Where I am at fault

  I will admit it and swear also

  That I shall try and set it right.’

  ‘Thank you Grendel, for your word,’ Beowulf then stood up, smiling, ‘That sounded rational to me.’

  He quickly sat down again and asked his next question, barely giving the crowd time to argue or disagree.

  ‘Grendel, there was no dispute between you and King Lars or the men of King Lars’ Kingdom before the building of the Great Beer Hall was there?’

  ‘No. I and my family have lived

  Here by the lake, all the days that

  I have known. We had no quarrel

  With men before the Beer Hall came.’

  ‘Could you tell us what effect the building of the Beer hall had on the lives of yourself and your mother?’

  Grendel paused and looked at the mass of men. He wanted to speak with courage and honesty, but without anger. He also wanted the people to understand.

  ‘The lake used to be full of fish. We would catch the fish and that was our food. When the brewery came it poisoned the lake and all the fish died. The food that we had depended on was destroyed.’

  Many of the villagers nodded and murmured agreement; they had also used to fish in the lake.

  ‘And this was your grievance with King Lars? This was why you began to kill and eat men? Because King Lars had taken your fish?’

  Beowulf asked this question as if it was of only minor importance, a fact that needed to be checked. Grendel was anxious that he was being led into a trap.

  ‘No!’ he replied immediately, when the fish were gone we talked with important men and tried to make other arrangements. When this did not work we hunted around for scraps and lived as best as we could. We became hungry, but that did not make us killers. That came later.’

  ‘Tell us about that.’

  As Grendel became more heated, Beowulf became even more calm and controlled. Grendel found that he was unable to resist telling the truth and so continued recklessly.

  ‘I was attacked! I got lost and wandered into the orchard. I was trying to leave, but guards chased me and when they attacked me I defended myself.’

  ‘And killed one?’

  ‘Yes, I killed one. He tried to kill me.’

  ‘And then you ate him?’

  Beowulf pronounced this as provocatively as he could, his question produced uproar from the watching humans, who began to get to their feet and shout. Roscow called for silence, which uneasily returned. Grendel looked at Beowulf as if to ask, ‘why are you doing this to me?’ Beowulf met his eye and continued.

  ‘You ate him.’

  ‘Yes,’ said Grendel, ‘I had not eaten. I had fought and run. I was angry and I ate him.’

  This time Roscow and Beowulf’s guards were ready to try and stem the uproar that came from the crowd. All the men were now on their feet and shouts of ‘Monster!’ and ‘Murderer!’ where quite clear; eventually the crowd was quietened.

  Beowulf continued with a tone of sadness,

  ‘And after that, you got a taste for it?’

  ‘No,’ Grendel replied and then stopped, ‘I mean…I suppose..’

  ‘Well?’

  Grendel was looking down, the crowd were hissing with fury. Then to everyone’s surprise Grendel began to cry. The crowd were puzzled by this and grew quieter; none of them had ever seen a troll cry. At length Grendel pulled himself together. He looked directly at Beowulf.

  ‘To some extent. I justified myself- I said that it was right to eat my enemies. That they would kill me if I did not kill them.’

  Beowulf stood up and turned to the crowd,

  ‘We can all understand this,’ he said, ‘when threatened we respond with anger and we justify our aggression as self-defence.’

  He sat down again and asked another question,

  ‘But this changed?’

  ‘Yes,’ replied Grendel, ‘I was out walking and I came across the unconscious body of this man.’ He pointed to Thwurp. ‘I had begun to feel it was wrong to kill and so, when I found him, I took him to my cave and spoke with him. I let him go, but he returned and stabbed me in the leg.’

  Thwurp looked embarrassed, but did not intervene.

  ‘And have you killed since then?’

  ‘No. I have not.’

  Suddenly there was a shout from the crowd,

  ‘What about the child?’

  This was generally taken up by the crowd until Thwurp, who had now fully understood that Grendel had not tricked or tried to kill him shouted;

  ‘That was not this troll, it was another one.’

  This caused some confusion, until Thwurp explained how
he had escaped, and then seen the other troll carrying the body of the child. People from the village were also prepared to confirm that Grendel was not the troll from the village.

  The mood had now changed in the crowd. They had begun to see Grendel as a creature that was much more like them than they would have believed. Some pitied him and others empathised with his fight against the autocratic authority of King Lars. Grendel began to fully appreciate the manipulative skills of Beowulf, somehow by showing the best and worst of him he had made the crowd understand.

  King Lars was not happy. ‘What is he doing?’ he thought, ‘Trying to justify it! He is supposed to be killing it, not inviting it to join us!’ He wanted to interrupt the proceedings, but before he could Beowulf continued;

  ‘I think we can all see that you have spoken truly and from the heart. However we now must clear up some legal points. The lake and all in it belong, do they not, to the Great King Lars who has lawfully seized them, by right of conquest and eminent domain?’

  ‘I do not know,’ replied Grendel, ‘we do not have laws like this. The lake is there, the fish belong to the troll who catches them.’

  Beowulf looked stern and magisterial,

  ‘Well troll, there are laws; and by right the lake belongs to King Lars and to fish in it you should have requested royal permission.’

  ‘I did not know.’

  ‘In order to settle this dispute, you must acknowledge the law. Then we can come to a lawful agreement. Do you understand this?’

  ‘Yes,’ replied Grendel.

  ‘Then do you consent to be bound by the laws of the Kingdom of Lars?’

  Grendel thought very hard.

  ‘It seems unfair. The Trolls were here before Lars and the lake should belong to itself. But I do not wish to fight, I will accept the laws.’

  ‘Very wise,’ agreed Beowulf. He stood up and addressed the King,

  ‘King Lars! We have heard from the troll. All can see that he speaks plainly and honestly, even to his own discredit. He fell into a state of discord with your most revered Majesty due to his bestial ignorance of human law, which we have now corrected. He will agree to no longer steal from the royal lake and to seek legal employment. He has killed members of your guard, as one would in a state of war. I believe you can now accept his surrender, he may pledge allegiance and your realm will have gained an honest and hard-working subject. The troll is clearly innocent of the murder of the child and will assist in finding the guilty troll. I propose that your Highness should accept the troll as a subject and he should then return home.’