Hoping for Hawthorne

by Ericson, Tara Grace

  The week had passed with all the hurry of a lame turtle. Instead of his usual evening outings, he’d begged off and wallowed at home. Since the woman at the bar, he couldn’t bring himself to spend another evening with his friends. Considering his options, Hawthorne tugged his phone out of his jeans and thumbed through his contacts until he saw Josh’s name.

  Hey man. It’s been awhile. You free tonight?

  Josh’s reply came quickly.

  Good to hear from you! I’ve got a portrait session at five, but I’d be free around 6:30. Want to hit the bistro?

  Sounds good. I’ll meet you there.

  His mood brightened at the plans for the evening. Josh had been his friend for twenty years, and even though they didn’t see each other much anymore, Josh was likely to be better company than any of his friends from college.

  That evening, Hawthorne opened the door to the bistro and surveyed the space, admiring the completed renovations. He’d heard nothing but rave reviews since Chrissy hired a chef from Chicago who could apparently turn an ordinary sandwich into something that would knock your socks off. Chrissy was a couple years younger and was close friends with Josh’s younger sister, Mandy.

  Chrissy greeted him with a smile. “Hey, stranger. Long time no see.”

  “The place looks great, Chrissy.”

  Hawthorne grabbed a table along the wall and waited for his friend. A flash of black leather caught his eye through the front window, and he couldn’t help but smile. Josh was an eclectic mix of biker and artist; covered with tattoos Hawthorne could never imagine having. Somehow, it worked for Josh, though. He slipped through the door and scanned the room before spotting Hawthorne against the wall.

  Hawthorne stood and extended his hand to his friend, who pulled him into a hug. A few slaps on the back from each of them and they parted.

  Slipping off his jacket, Hawthorne spotted several new tattoos on Josh’s arms. “Is there even any ink left at the tattoo parlor?”

  “Probably just enough for you to get that heart with my name in it you’ve been wanting,” Josh joked as they sat down. “Wow, it’s been a minute, hasn’t it? What’s new in your world?” he asked.

  “Not much, man. Same old stuff around the farm, you know how it is.”

  Josh shook his head. “E-I-E-I-O? Picking goats and riding carrots isn’t really my thing,” he joked. “I’m glad somebody does it though,” he said with a grin. “Actually, I am shooting Chrissy and Todd’s wedding there in a few weeks.”

  “Oh, nice. Lily’s done a good job with the event barn. She’s booked almost every weekend,” Hawthorne said proudly.

  Instead of asking more about the event venue like Hawthorne thought he would, Josh gave a non-committal hum and changed the subject. “Mandy said Daisy’s fixing up the old homestead?”

  Hawthorne chuckled. “Yeah, I’m not sure she realized what she was biting off. Mom and Dad invested in it, but I think her budget is about maxed out. She was in a heated discussion with the contractor before I left.” He shook his head at his sister’s antics. “She’s passionate, which is cool. But she’s also… Daisy.” He didn’t know how to explain it, but he knew Josh would understand. Daisy had always been a whirlwind of activity and ideas, all wrapped up in one over-caffeinated package.

  Josh laughed. “That makes sense. Cool for her, though. That’s a big project.”

  After they ordered their dinner, Josh pushed him for answers. “What’s going on, man? I don’t think we’ve hung out since that birthday party. What was that, two years ago, now?”

  With a sigh, Hawthorne ran a hand through his hair. “I know, I’m sorry I kind of disappeared on you. I envy you, you know?” At Josh’s confused look, he continued. “You’ve got your thing. Your photography, your motorcycle,” He gestured to his friend’s tattoo-covered arms, “your body-as-a-canvas thing. You’ve got good friends and, I don’t know, it just seems like I don’t have any of that.”

  Josh raised an eyebrow at him. “What do you have?”

  “That’s the problem. I’m Mr. Fix-it around the farm, which I actually do like. It keeps me busy and I get a paycheck. And I’ve got my friends, but Shayne and Craig…” Hawthorne hesitated. Josh had met his friends and didn’t approve. Which is one of the reasons they hadn’t seen each other in so long.

  “Shayne and Craig what?” Josh wasn’t going to drop it.

  “They just… Well, the other night, they were flirting with the waitress and being kind of over-the-top.” Hawthorne didn’t miss the wrinkle in Josh’s brow. “It wasn’t a big deal, nothing obnoxious,” he tried to defend his friends, but the memory of the beautiful stranger’s face appeared in his mind. “Okay, maybe a little obnoxious. Actually, this girl from the other table called them out on it.”

  “You go, girl,” Josh muttered under his breath.

  Hawthorne couldn’t help but share the rest. “The strangest part was that she knew me. Like, she knew my full name and she acted so disappointed in me.”

  Josh narrowed his eyes. “And you didn’t know her?”

  Holding up his hands in surrender, Hawthorne replied, “Nope. She looked familiar, but I could not place her for the life of me. It was so weird.”

  Josh gave him a skeptical look. “Was she someone you met on a night you might not remember?”

  “What? No!” he said firmly. “Look, I know I might not be a saint, but I’ve never been like Craig and Shayne. Probably too many dang sisters.”

  Josh smiled, “Probably. But if it had been one of your sisters and people were treating her like Craig and Shayne did?” Josh gave him a questioning glance, pointing out his own hypocrisy.

  Hawthorne’s jaw clenched, his protective instinct flaring at the hypothetical situation. One thing he always liked about Josh was his no-nonsense attitude about things. “I get your drift. I would never let someone treat my sisters like that.”

  The food arrived and conversation shifted to lighter topics, but after the food was gone, Josh circled back to what was still on Hawthorne’s mind. “What are you going to do?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean about this girl. Clearly she made an impression, or you wouldn’t be talking about her four days later. Do you think you can find her?” Josh asked.

  Hawthorne held up his hands in surrender and shook his head. “No way, man. You should have seen the way she looked at me. Like I was manure on the bottom of her boot. I don’t know how she knows me, but I’ll never see her again anyway.”

  “If you say so, H. But I wouldn’t bet on it.” Josh smirked. “Women who tie us up in knots have a habit of never really disappearing.”

  Seeing a chance to divert attention away from himself, Hawthorne jumped on the comment, “Oh? Just who exactly is tying you up in knots?” Josh had never mentioned a girlfriend in the entire time they’d known each other. Nearly twenty years with no relationships to speak of made a guy wonder. Hawthorne studied Josh’s eyes closely.

  Josh cleared his throat. “Don’t worry about me. You just worry about making sure the next time you see this mysterious stranger, you are proud of how she sees you. I think that has more to do with it than anything. If you aren’t proud of who you are, it’s easy to be defensive when someone else says something that hits a nerve.”

  Hawthorne let Josh deflect the question about his own love life, but after a silent moment he followed up. “Do you think she was right about me?”

  “The question isn’t whether I think she was right. The real question is whether or not you do.”

  3

  Hawthorne and Daisy stepped down from his truck and walked across the driveway to the front door of the main house. They still lived at the farm, but it was almost a full mile from the old homestead to the main house, and on a chilly Saturday morning, it was worth driving instead of hoofing it.

  Opening the door, Hawthorne waved Daisy in ahead of him. The smell of bacon and cinnamon wafted through the air and enveloped him while visions of cinnamon rolls made his
mouth start to water. Saturday morning brunch had been a Bloom family tradition ever since Hawthorne could remember. Some of his earliest memories were getting up to help his dad with the animals and coming back to the house for warm plates of bacon, eggs, and pancakes. As they all got older and weeknight dinners were replaced with dance classes, softball, or baseball, Saturday mornings became the one time a week the whole family was guaranteed to be around.

  When he and Daisy walked into the open-concept dining room and kitchen, his mom was spreading icing on a full sheet tray of giant cinnamon rolls. Swiping icing from the corner of the pan with his finger, he gave his mom a grateful smile.

  His mom tipped her butter knife at him and gave him a pointed look. “Knock it off, Hawthorne Philip.”

  He gave her a sheepish smile in return, “Is there coffee?”

  Laura gestured to the pot behind her. “Should be done by now.”

  Daisy walked to the refrigerator and dug around until she found the Diet Dr. Pepper she kept stashed in the back of the bottom drawer. “Ah-hah!”

  Hawthorne gave her a disgusted look. “Isn’t it too early for that?”

  Daisy twirled to a seat at the bar, “Never!” She tucked one foot up onto the bar stool where she was perched and rested her soda on her legging-clad thigh.

  Poppy wandered in, still wrapping a ponytail holder onto the end of a braid.

  “Good morning, sweetheart,” Laura said.

  “Where’s Dad?” Poppy looked around for him.

  “I think he just got out of the shower,” Laura replied with a glance toward their bedroom door.

  Lavender walked through the laundry room and into the kitchen, carrying a jug of orange juice from the refrigerator in the garage. “Oh, hey guys!” She set it on the table and then grabbed a stack of plates from the cupboard by the sink.

  Laura spoke up, “We’ve got an extra this morning, Lovey. Could you set the table for eight?”

  Eyebrows rose around the kitchen, but Hawthorne was the first to speak. “Who’s coming? Is Andi back in town?” he asked, referring to their sister stationed in Afghanistan with the Army.

  “I wish,” his mother said kindly. “No, actually I ran into an old friend at the grocery store and invited her to join us. Do you all remember Avery Chase?”

  “Avery Chase?” Hawthorne repeated slowly, testing the name and trying to place it.

  Daisy straightened, “Oh my goodness, Avery is back?” Daisy’s eyes shone with excitement. Avery must be another one of his sisters’ friends.

  Lavender grabbed another plate and began to set the table while Poppy and Daisy chattered about memories of Avery. Hawthorne sipped his coffee and gathered from the ongoing prattle that Avery had moved away when Daisy was seventeen, which meant Hawthorne would have been twenty-one. At that age he was hardly concerned with his younger sisters’ friends. It was still interesting that his mom had invited the young woman over for brunch, since brunch was typically reserved for family. Maybe this Avery had been closer to his sisters than he realized.

  Rose walked in from the laundry room and pulled off her boots. “Good morning, everybody.”

  Greetings for their youngest sister filled the kitchen as she made her way toward the living room. “I’m going to change my shirt real quick before breakfast. One of the dogs rolled in something before he decided I needed a hug.” Rose seemed unbothered, but Hawthorne could smell the foul odor as she passed him.

  “I don’t smell anything other than your usual delightful scent, sis,” he teased. Rose rolled her eyes and gave him a sharp tap on the back of the head before dancing away toward the bedrooms when he tried to retaliate.

  Lavender gave an exaggerated gag. “Gross. I’m so glad I don’t have to help with animals anymore.” Despite growing up on the farm, Lavender was the least “country” girl Hawthorne had ever met. She adored fashion and spent far too much time online, but Lavender had carved out a nice little niche by managing the farm’s social media and website, which was growing more and more important for business. With Daisy’s added Bed and Breakfast, it would take on a life of its own.

  Just then, a knock on the front door sounded. Daisy jumped up and exclaimed, “I’ll get it!” before jogging to the door. Hawthorne heard her squeals and the soft thumps as Daisy jumped on the tile in her socks. He shook his head and took a deep swig of the coffee, finally at a drinkable temperature, as Daisy turned the corner. A familiar flash of blonde hair and an emerald green headband registered with a coffee-filled gasp caught in his throat. Hawthorne felt a stab of pain as he forced himself to swallow and the coughing began.

  * * *

  Avery followed Daisy through the living room and turned the corner to the expansive kitchen. Immediately, her eyes landed on Hawthorne, his coffee cup to his lips. Their eyes met for a split second before he began to cough and sputter and Avery, panicked at the sight of him, turned her gaze to friendlier faces.

  Laura cracked eggs into a mixing bowl. “Oh Avery, I’m so glad you’re here!” She glanced at her son with concern. “Are you okay, Hawthorne?”

  He waved a hand, still coughing. Then, he walked past Avery and into the other room, the noise of his coughing fit dampened by the walls between them.

  Poppy came up and gave Avery a quick hug. “It’s so good to see you, Avery! It’s been so long.”

  “It really has,” Avery replied.

  “Can I get you a cup of coffee or hot chocolate?”

  “Or a Diet Dr. Pepper?” Daisy grinned, holding up her can of soda.

  Avery couldn’t help but chuckle at her long-time friend. “Coffee would be wonderful, thank you,” she said to Poppy. To Daisy she said, “When did you make the switch to diet?”

  Daisy rolled her eyes, “Ugh. Don’t remind me. The freshman fifteen finally caught me during senior year and I gave up regular soda after I graduated. When I had to stop dancing, it was a lot harder to burn those extra calories.”

  Poppy handed Avery a warm mug and Avery inhaled the rich aroma of fresh coffee. This was worlds better than the coffee in the professors’ lounge.

  Avery shifted her weight uncomfortably for a moment, but the silence didn’t last long. A young woman came into the kitchen and Avery wondered which sister it was. It was hard enough to keep track back when she saw them every day.

  “Rose, did you see your father?” Laura asked, answering Avery’s question. Avery tried to remember Rose from before she moved, but Rose had only been eleven or twelve. Now, she was a grown woman. It really had been a long time.

  Mr. Bloom entered the kitchen with the loud voice Avery remembered fondly. “Good morning, family! Surely, this is the day the Lord has made!” Avery smiled at his exuberance. “And good morning, Avery. Laura told me she invited you; what a wonderful surprise.”

  Keith kissed his wife on the cheek and swiped some frosting from the edge of a sheet tray filled with cinnamon rolls the size of Avery’s face. Laura blushed at his affection, and half-heartedly swatted at his hand.

  “Are we all ready to eat?” she asked, handing her husband a plate piled with bacon.

  Lavender spoke up, “Looks like we are just waiting on Lily and Hawthorne.”

  Laura looked toward the living room, “Go make sure he didn’t cough up a lung and tell him to get in here or I’m giving his cinnamon roll to Apollo.” She set the skillet of scrambled eggs on a trivet on the table, along with the sheet pan of giant cinnamon rolls.

  “Apollo?” Avery asked Daisy quietly as Lavender went to find her brother.

  They made their way to the table as Daisy explained. “Mom’s dog. When Titan died, Mom swore she’d never get another dog. But about six months later, Apollo showed up on the farm. He’s the most spoiled dog you’ve ever seen,” she said with obvious affection for her mother.

  They settled at the table and Lavender came back in with Hawthorne. Avery watched him, but he never looked in her direction. Lily rushed in behind them, a thick notebook under her arm, apologizing for her tardiness. Ha
wthorne focused all his attention toward Keith who was about to pray. Keith held out his hands and slowly, each member of the family joined hands in a complete circle. Daisy squeezed Avery’s left hand and Poppy held her right, filling her with the familiar sense of belonging she’d always felt with the Bloom family.

  Keith began to pray, filling the dining room with his warm, confident tone. “Father God, thank you for this beautiful morning. There is nothing I value more than the family you’ve blessed me with. We ask your continued hand over Dandelion, stationed overseas. Protect her and bring her home to us safely. Thank you for bringing Avery here this morning, and thank you for this food and the continued blessing of our home and farm. We love you. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

  A chorus of ‘amens’ echoed around the table and a flurry of activity erupted as people reached for fruit, bacon, or orange juice. It was worlds different from the family dinners she’d shared over the years with her parents and single sister, Brielle. Brie was four years younger and couldn’t be more different from Avery. She still lived in Colorado, happy to live in the small tourist town and work at the mountain resort and ski lodge. Avery’s parents were serious and studious, and family dinners at the Chase household felt more like moderated discussions on current events or scientific trivia.

  Amidst the sudden chatter, Avery looked across the table, trying to catch Hawthorne’s eyes, but he was caught in conversation with Rose two seats down. Was he avoiding her on purpose? Of course he was; she’d humiliated him at the bar in front of his friends. Avery shifted in her seat and sat up straight, absolving herself of the twinge of guilt. Hawthorne was the one hanging out with those lowlife womanizers. She shouldn’t feel guilty about what happened; he should.