Love or Lust 2

by Rachael Brownell

  “You could say that,” I start, turning and tossing my purse on the counter. After walking back into the living room, I take a seat on the sofa and wait for him to join me. When he doesn’t, I let out a sigh. “I made my decision.”

  “And?” he counters quickly.

  “And he didn’t like what I had to say.”

  “Which was what exactly? I need to hear you say the words, Presley,” Jace states. Each word punctuated with purpose as he slowly stalks over to where I’m seated, stopping in front of me.

  When I look up, I find his green eyes pleading with me.

  “I chose you, Jace. To fight for you. To be with you. Damn the game. Damn the consequences. If nothing else, I want to walk away from here with you and only you.”

  Jace’s eyes never leave mine as he kneels and takes my hands in his.

  “Are those the words you wanted to hear?” I tease when he doesn’t respond.

  Jace nods before placing a kiss on the back of my hands, pulling me off the couch and into his lap on the floor. I’m straddling him, pressing against him in the most intimate places.

  More than anything, I’m home in his arms. I feel safe. Comfortable to be myself. Loved.

  Chapter Seven

  Day 22

  Sunday.

  My least favorite day of the week.

  I’m reminded exactly what day it is when Claudia knocks on my door early as shit, hands me a package, and walks away without a word. This week’s packet of information, all stuff I’ll look at later once I’m awake and in the mood, along with a card to vote for immunity. At least I know who I’m nominating this week, not that he’ll be granted it.

  Because two people are going to leave today. Two people that I like. One of those people could be me depending on how the votes go.

  It’s probably a good thing that we only vote for the opposite sex. I feel like the other girls would like to see me leave. It didn’t dawn on me until this morning that I haven’t really seen or heard from any of them this week. I mean, I know we’ve all been a little preoccupied with our own stuff, but the more I think about it, the more it feels like I’m being left out.

  Everyone was at the pool the other morning when I was leaving Jace’s villa.

  Everyone except me and Jace.

  No one knocked on his door to invite him.

  I doubt anyone came looking for me.

  Was that intentional? Did they know we were together?

  Lennon knew. He saw me run into his place the night before. Courtney might have as well. I’m not sure if she followed Lennon when he chased after me or not.

  Ugh!

  Why do I even care? It’s not like I’ll stay close to any of them after this. We’re from different parts of the country. Once we’re voted off, that’s it. Our friendship is more than likely over. There’s no reason for us to stay in contact.

  Still, as I lie on the couch staring at my ceiling, I dread what I know is going to happen tonight. I don’t want to see any of them sent home. It doesn’t seem fair in a way. You get one shot to impress the guys. Either they think you try too hard or not hard enough. You’re in competition with other women to gain their attention.

  And vice versa for the guys.

  Will the girls try and vote Lennon or Jace off? Knowing that their sights are set on me?

  That doesn’t seem fair either. To eliminate someone just because they don’t have any interest in you.

  My mind bounces between how unfair the rules are, hating the game, and thoughts of Jace for the next hour before I finally pull myself out of bed. My phone has chimed at least five times since waking up, and I’ve ignored it every single time, not ready to deal with whoever is trying to get in contact with me.

  After making coffee and showering, I settle in on the couch and pray for time to slow down. I still have a few hours before I need to start getting ready for tonight’s meeting. Ready to vote off a good guy that deserves to stay here as much as anyone else.

  Rolling my eyes, I reach for my phone when it chimes again. Not once, or twice, but three times in a row. I regret the decision as soon as I see who’s texting me.

  WREN: A TV show? Really, Presley?

  WREN: I can’t believe you fucking told everyone why we broke up!

  WREN: We have to talk. Please call me.

  WREN: Or text me.

  WREN: You can’t ignore me forever.

  WREN: Answer your phone.

  WREN: We need to talk about this. You aired our dirty laundry on national television. Everyone knows what happened.

  WREN: Listen, I know you didn’t think they would put it on TV, but they did. You need to do damage control while the cameras are rolling.

  WREN: Presley. Please answer your damn phone. I’m sorry for what I did, but that was between us.

  I stare at the text messages, reading them over and over again. The first two were from last night after I fell asleep. The rest are from the last few hours.

  Reading between the lines, I can almost hear the panic in his voice. He’s freaking out. He should. Maybe if he’d cared enough back then, he would have thought twice about what he did. Maybe he wouldn’t have made the same decision. Maybe he wouldn’t have stuck his dick in her, in our house, over and over again.

  Honestly, I don’t care who knows what happened anymore. I did nothing to deserve it. I was good to him. For years. Gave him everything he wanted, or so I thought.

  My fingers hover over the keyboard, poised to type a witty reply when I stop myself.

  He doesn’t deserve anything from me. Not a reply. He’s sure as hell not getting an apology. Not even a goodbye.

  But unless I reply, he’s not going to stop texting. There’s only one thing I can think of that will make him go away willingly.

  ME: I think you have the wrong phone number, dude.

  Ha! I had to throw in the “dude” so he assumed he messaged a guy.

  Ten minutes later when my phone is still silent, I praise myself for being the bigger person and walking away without a fight. Honestly, I don’t have enough fight left in me to go toe to toe with him anymore. He’s a part of my past, and I want him to stay there.

  WREN: Nice try. This conversation isn’t over. As soon as you’re back in town, we will talk. Whether you want to or not.

  Well, fuck me. Now I actually have to change my phone number. I probably should have a long time ago anyway.

  A sudden knock at my door has me dropping my phone on the floor and kicking it under the sofa as I jump. The door opens as I’m bent over, trying to grab it with my fingertips, but it’s out of reach.

  “Need a hand?” Jace asks.

  That voice. God . . . it’s probably a good thing I didn’t ask him to stay last night. He wanted to. I saw it in his eyes but knew if I let him, things would get physical, and as much as the idea of being with Jace excites me, I’d rather not have the moment captured on camera.

  Not that things were purely innocent. We made out for over an hour. Hands were roaming. I felt how turned on he was as I sat on his lap. There was no doubt in my mind what would have happened if he stayed, which was why he had to leave.

  Looking over my shoulder I find him appraising me with his eyes. The tiny shorts I’m wearing leave little to the imagination, especially with me on my hands and knees.

  Pushing myself off the floor, I motion toward the sofa, and Jace kneels, reaches under, and retrieves my phone. The screen is lit up with another text, I’m assuming from Wren. Handing it back to me, Jace raises his left brow in curiosity.

  “I’m guessing he saw me on the show. He’s pissed I let the entire world know what an ass he was to me,” I explain as I look down at the last text Wren sent.

  WREN: Have fun with your new boy toys. Not that either of them will ever treat you as well as I did.

  “And you’re talking to him, why? Seems to me he doesn’t deserve a second of your attention.”

  “He doesn’t, but he won’t shut up. I even tried telling him he ha
d the wrong number, but he called me out.”

  “May I?” Jace asks, extending his hand for the phone.

  “Knock yourself out,” I state firmly, dropping my phone into his palm.

  He spends a few minutes typing, pausing, typing again, and when he’s satisfied, hands my phone back to me for approval.

  JACE: You really shouldn’t threaten women. It makes you less of a man, dude. You should treat them like they’re your queen. Show a little respect. If this chick doesn’t want to talk to you anymore, let her go. Also, your text had me intrigued, so I did a little digging, and this Presley chick is hot. You royally fucked yourself there. Hope the new chick was worth it.

  “That’s going to piss him off even more. I think I might need to actually change my number as soon as this is over. Until then, I’ll ignore him.”

  Jace nods in understanding before pulling me into his arms and pressing a kiss to my temple. “If you need me to send more taunting texts, just let me know. I’ll fuck with his mind for you. It’ll be fun.”

  I can’t help but giggle at the thought of Jace texting with Wren, the pissed off look on Wren’s face as he reads the messages while Jace smirks as he sends each one. God, if they ever met . . . all hell would break loose. Jace towers over him by at least three inches and is built like a brick house. Wren is muscular but nothing compared to Jace.

  It wouldn’t be a fair fight. Fine by me. Maybe a little physical pain would be good for Wren since he seems to be on the giving end of pain normally.

  Jace spent the next two hours distracting me. Not only from Wren’s texts that kept coming but also from the elimination tonight. I knew what he was doing. He was making the most of the time we had left together in case this was the last day for one of us.

  Nothing is certain.

  One of us could go home. Hell, both of us could be voted off.

  Which is probably why when he kissed me goodbye, it felt final. My heart hurt and tears threatened to fall as he closed my door behind him.

  Gold.

  I only wear it when I need to feel bold. In control. On top of the world.

  Right now, I feel none of those things, so when I caught sight of the gold dress hanging in my closet, I instinctively reached for it. It’ll give the appearance of confidence even though I feel anything but.

  With only a few minutes to spare, I grab my phone—ignoring the twelve texts from Wren I still need to read—and take a quick selfie in the full-length mirror, sending it off to Naomi. She replies immediately with wishes of luck and tells me I look stunning.

  What are best friends for?

  The girls are all congregating outside the villas. They fall silent when I approach. It’s a bit awkward until Bella pulls me in for a hug and the rest of the girls join.

  “What’s going on?” I ask, Courtney’s hair getting stuck to my lip gloss.

  “We plan to walk in united. One of us is going home, and it doesn’t matter who it is. Right now, we’re all here and . . .” Teegan’s voice trails off as her she begins to stutter.

  I get the message loud and clear. No matter what happens, we’re saying our goodbyes right here and now. Kind of like what Jace and I did earlier just in case.

  Arms linked, Bella, Courtney, Teegan, Natasha, and I all make our way to the main house where the guys are waiting for us outside the door. Next to them is an irritated-looking Claudia, tapping her heel against the pavement.

  Without a word, she opens the door. The guys usher us through first, and Claudia hands each of us a voting slip and pens as we pass her, taking our immunity slips in exchange. My hands shake as I try to fill out my form. I made my decisions this morning, but now that the moment is here, I’m second-guessing everything.

  Because I don’t want anyone to go home.

  And I don’t want to go home. Not yet. I’m not ready.

  I may have hated this idea in the beginning. It may have taken Naomi a shit-ton of booze to get me to agree. Still, at the end of the day, I’m glad I’m here, and I’m ready to fight until the bitter end. Whenever that may be.

  After turning in our slips, Claudia arranges us on the platform, pushing us as close together as she can get us. The spotlights seem brighter tonight, the cameras closer. It’s all I can focus on until Ed’s voice interrupts my thoughts.

  “How’s everyone doing tonight?” he asks, addressing us. The cameras aren’t rolling yet, so he lacks the usual amount of swagger he puts on for the camera.

  There is a mumble of fines and goods before he nods his head and turns to face the nearest camera, shouting at the man behind it. We stand there for ten minutes before I notice the light above the camera begin blinking and hear the soft countdown as Claudia motions at us behind the camera to smile.

  “Welcome back to Love or Lust,” Ed begins. Motioning to the ten of us, he keeps his eyes focused on the camera. “Right now, there are ten hearts still in the game. By the time the night is over, two of them will be sent home, voted off by their peers. Who’s going to make the cut? And who will be packing their bags tonight? You’ll find out soon, but first, let’s take a look at what the contestants have been up to this week.

  “After a group date on Monday, each guy was given the opportunity to impress the ladies. They were given some additional information about each of the ladies and asked to pick an activity they thought the ladies would enjoy. Let’s hope they did well because only one person will be granted immunity tonight. Here are some of the highlights of this week’s dates . . .”

  His voice trails off as the light above the camera changes from green to red.

  Ed pivots in place and steps toward us. “We have a problem. There was a tie for immunity tonight, so it’s been proposed that we have the ladies re-vote.”

  “Can’t you just grant both of them immunity?” Teegan asks.

  “That’s also an option. The third option would be to use the weekly voting as an indicator. The guy with the lower score of the two would be granted immunity.“

  “I like that idea,” Courtney says, looking at the rest of us for confirmation. “It seems to be the fairest way.”

  All of us nod in agreement.

  “That’s what we’ll do, then,” Ed states.

  “Wait,” I hear myself say. “I think you should grant them both immunity. If that’s the way the voting went, that’s what the decision was. It’s not fair to take it away from one person. They should both be able to stay.”

  Ed seems to stare at me for longer than necessary before turning and walking away without a word.

  Claudia approaches with white envelopes for each of us. I take mine just as Jace places his hand on the small of my back, startling me. The envelope slips from my fingers and falls to the ground face down. With a huff, Claudia crouches down and picks it up, placing it in my hand and wrapping my fingers around it dramatically.

  “What a bitch,” Jace whispers behind me, receiving a chuckle from everyone as she storms off.

  I’m about to reply when Ed reappears and immediately jumps back into action.

  “Welcome back . . .” Ed’s voice fades to the background as I stand on the platform, fake smile on my face, fear in my heart.

  Going through the motions, I step forward when all the girls are called down and open my envelope. There’s a golden ticket to match my dress in mine, and I’m relieved to stay another week. Looking left and right, I notice the look of shock on Natasha’s face just as Ed announces she’s been eliminated.

  With tears in her eyes, she walks toward a waiting Claudia and out the door. She’ll be gone before we’re done filming. It’s a good thing we said goodbye earlier.

  The guys are called forward as we return to the platform, and I focus on the sound of Ed’s voice.

  “We had a tie for immunity this week and thus have decided to grant it to both of the individuals. Congratulations to Drake and Jace. You both can step back on the stage. The rest of you gentleman can open your envelopes.”

  Holding my breath, I watch
as each of them rips his envelope open. Milo lets out a little shout, waving his gold ticket above his head. Lennon nods in acceptance, my heart dropping in my chest. He slowly pulls out his golden ticket, and I let out a ragged sigh.

  That leaves Callen, who has a smile on his face even though his envelope is empty.

  “I’m sorry, Callen, but your time on Love or Lust has come to an end.”

  Callen waves and off he goes. I think he was ready. This wasn’t where he wanted to be. He has shit to deal with at home and being eliminated might be the best thing for him. Not that I’m not sad to see him go.

  “Congratulations to the eight of you for surviving another week. I hope you’re ready for what we have in store next. Ladies, you’ll be cooking this week for your guys. They’ll determine who receives immunity and who is going home. You’re halfway to the finish line.”

  Turning back to the camera, Ed winks before saying, “Only two people can make it to the end. Will it be love or lust? You’ll have to stay tuned to find out.”

  Like we did last week, the remaining contestants joined hands and waited for Callen and Natasha. A final farewell. Callen showed up first, a bag in each hand and a huge smile on his face. Natasha wasn’t as pleasant as she walked past us, shooting glares in the guys’ directions. I’m sure her feelings are hurt, they voted her off, but it had to be someone. I’m just glad it wasn’t me this week.

  Let’s hope my fate doesn’t change next Sunday. My cooking skills aren’t that spectacular.

  Chapter Eight

  Day 23

  I’ve survived another day here. Another week. Three down, hopefully three more to go.